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that would carry a single or double upon
an occasion, and make a pretty appearFortune sermes resolred to humble the Family of ance at church, or upon a visit. This at Hatfield. Mortifications are often more first I opposed stoutly; but it was stoutly poznajul thar real Calumities.
defended. However, as I weakened, my When we were returned home, the antagonist gained strength, till at last it myht was dedicated to schemes of future was resolved to part with him. cuaquest. Deborah exerted much sagacity As the fair happened on the following in conjecturing which of the two girls was day, I had intentions of going myself ; libely to have the best place, and most but my wife persuaded me that I had got opportunities of seeing good company. a cold, and nothing could prevail upon The only obstacle to our preferment was her to permit me from home. “No, my m obtaining the Squire's recommendation; dear,” said she, “ our son Moses is a dislat he had already shown us too many creet boy, and can buy and sell to a very instances of his friendship to doubt of it good advantage : you know all our great 20w. Even in bed, my wife kept up the bargains are of his purchasing. He always tal theme : “Well, faith, my dear stands out and higgles, and actually tires Charles
, between ourselves, í think we them till he gets a bargain.” have made an excellent day's work of it.” As I had some opinion of my son's
pru--- Pretty well !” cried I, not knowing dence, I was willing enough to entrust him what to say. “What, only pretty well !" with this commission : and the next mornreturned she: “I think it is very well. ing I perceived his sisters mighty busy in Suppose the girls should come to make fitting out Moses for the fair; trimming zoquaintances of taste in town! This I his hair, brushing his buckles, and cockam assured of, that London is the only ing his hat with pins. The business of place in the world for all manner of hus the toilet being over, we had at last the bands, Besides, my dear, stranger things satisfaction of seeing him mounted upon happen every day: and as ladies of quality the colt, with a deal box before him to are so taken with my daughters, what will bring home groceries in. He had on a hot men of quality be? Entre nous, I coat made of that cloth they call thunderprotest I like my Lady Blarney vastly -
-Soand-lightning, which, though grown too Very obliging. However, Miss Carolina short, was much too good to be thrown Wilhelmina Amelia Skeggs has my warm away. His waistcoat was of gosling green, heart. But yet, when they came to talk and his sisters had tied his hair with a of places in town, you saw at once how broad black riband. We all followed him I nailed them. Tell me, my dear, don't several paces from the door, bawling after pop think I did for my children there?" him, “ Good luck! good luck!” till we -* Ay," returned I, not knowing well could see him no longer. what to think of the matter; “ Heaven He was scarce gone, when Mr. Thorngrant they may be both the better for it hill's butler came to congratulate us upon this day three months!” This was one of our good fortune, saying that he overheard those observations I usually made to im- his young master mention our names with press my wise with an opinion of my sa great commendation. gacity : for if the girls succeeded, then it
Good fortune seemed resolved not to was a pious wish fulfilled; but if any come alone. Another footman from the
sing unfortunate ensued, then it might be same family followed, with a card for my looked upon as a prophecy. All this con- daughters, importing that the two ladies Sersation, however, was only preparatory had received such pleasing accounts from to another scheme ; and indeed I'dreaded Mr. Thornhill of us all, that after a few as much. This was nothing less than that, previous inquiries they hoped to be per: as we were now to hold up our heads á fectly satisfied. “Ay,” cried my wife, “I litle higher in the world, it would be pro- now see it is no easy matter to get into the per to sell the colt, which was grown old, families of the great; but when one once at a neighbouring fair, and buy us a horse gets in, then, as Moses says, one may go
to sleep.” To this piece of humour, for yonder comes Moses, without a horse, she intended it for wit, my daughters and the box at his back." assented with a loud laugh of pleasure. As she spoke, Moses came slowly on In short, such was her satisfaction at this foot, and sweating under the deal box, message, that she actually put her hand in which he had strapt round his shoulders her pocket, and gave the messenger seven- like a pedlar. *Welcome, welcome, pence halfpenny.
Moses ! well, my boy, what have you This was to be our visiting day. The brought us from the fair?”—“I have next that came was Mr. Burchell, who brought you myself,” cried Moses, with a had been at the fair. He brought my little sly look, and resting the box on the ones a pennyworth of gingerbread each, dresser. “Ay, Moses,” cried my wife, which my wife undertook to keep for "that we know; but where is the horse." them, and give them by letters at a time. _“I have sold him," cried Moses, "for He brought my daughters also a couple three pounds five shillings and two; of boxes, in which they might keep wafers, pence. Well done, my good boy, snuff, patches, or even money, when they returned she; “I knew you would touch got it. My wife was usually fond of a them off. Between ourselves, three weasel-skin purse, as being the most lucky; pounds five shillings and twopence is no but this by the by. We had still a regard bad day's work. Come, let us have it for Mr. Burchell, though his late rude be- then.”—“I have brought back no money, haviour was in some measure displeasing; cried Moses again. I have laid it all nor could we now avoid comniunicating out in a bargain, and here it is,” pulling our happiness to him, and asking his ad- out a bundle from his breast : "here they vice: although we seldom followed advice, are ; a gross of green spectacles, with we were all ready enough to ask it. silver rims and shagreen cases.”—“A gross When he read the note from the two ladies, of green spectacles !” repeated my wife, he shook his head, and observed, that an in a faint voice. And you have parted affair of this sort demanded the utmost cir- with the colt, and brought us back cumspection. This air of diffidence highly nothing but a gross of green paltry specdispleased my wife. “I never doubted, tacles !”—“ Dear mother,” cried the boy, sir,” cried she, “your readiness to be “why won't you listen to reason? I had against my daughters and me. You have them a dead bargain, or I should not more circumspection than is wanted. have brought them. The silver rims However, I fancy when we come to ask alone will sell for double the money.' advice, we will apply to persons who seem 'A fig for the silver rims," cried my to have made use of it themselves." wise, in a passion : “I dare swear they
Whatever my own conduct may have won't sell for above half the money at the been, madam,” replied he, “is not the rate of broken silver, five shillings an present question: though, as I have made ounce.”—“ You need be under no uneasi. no use of advice myself, I should in con- ness,” cried I, “ about selling the rims, science give it to those that will. As I for they are not worth sixpence ; for I was apprehensive this answer might draw perceive they are only copper varnished on a repartee, making up by abuse what over.”- “ What !” cried my wife, “not it wanted in wit, I changed the subject, silver ! the rims not silver?"-"No," by seeming to wonder what could keep cried I," no more silver than your sauceour son so long at the fair, as it was now
And so," returned she, almost nightfall. “ Never mind our son, have parted with the colt, and have only cried my wise; “depend upon it he knows got a gross of green spectacles, with what he is about. I'll warrant we'll never copper rims and shagreen cases ? A mursee him sell his hen of a rainy day. I rain take such trumpery! The blockhead have seen him buy such bargains as would has been imposed upon, and should have
I'll tell you a good story known his company better.”—“There, about that, that will make you split your my dear,” cried I, "you are wrong ; he sides with laughing.– But, as I live, should not have known them at all.”.
“ Marry, hang the idiot!" returned she, “a Giant and a Dwarf were friends, and to bring me such stuff: if I had them I kept together. They made a bargain, would throw them in the fire.”—“ There that they would never forsake each other, again you are wrong, my dear,” cried I ; but go seek adventures. The first battle for though they be copper, we will keep they fought was with two Saracens, and them by us, as copper spectacles, you the Dwarf, who was very courageous, dealt know, are better than nothing.
one of the champions a most angry blow. By this time the unfortunate Moses was !t did the Saracen very little injury, who, undeceived. He now saw that he had been lifting up his sword, fairly struck off the imposed upon by a prowling sharper, who, poor Dwarf's arm. He was now in a observing his figure, had marked him for woful plight; but the Giant,coming to his an easy prey. I therefore asked the cir. assistance, in a short time left the two
cumstances of his deception. He sold the Saracens dead on the plain, and the Dwarf borse, it seems, and walked the fair in cut off the dead man's head out of spite. search of another. A reverend-looking They then travelled on another adventure. rar
: brought him to a tent, under pretence This was against three bloody-minded of having one to sell. “Here,” con- Satyrs, who were carrying away a damsel tinued Moses, "we met another man, very in distress. The Dwarf was not quite so well dressed, who desired to borrow fierce now as before; but for all that struck , twenty pounds upon these, saying that he the first blow, which was returned by wanted money, and would dispose of them another that knocked out his eye; but the for a third of the value. The first gentle Giant was soon up with them, and, had man, who pretended to be my friend, they not fled, would certainly have killed whispered me to buy them, and cautioned them every one. They were all very joyme not to let so good an offer pass, I ful for this victory, and the damsel who sent for Mr. Flamborough, and they talked was relieved fell in love with the Giant, him up as finely as they did me; and so and married him. They now travelled far, a! last we were persuaded to buy the two and farther than I can tell, till they met grass between us.”
with a company of robbers. The Giant,
for the first time, was foremost now; but CHAPTER XIII.
the Dwarf was not far behind. The battle Mr. Burchell is found to be an Enemy, for he has was stout and long. Wherever the Giant the confidence to give dlsagreeable Advice.
came, all fell before him; but the Dwarf Ol's family had now made several attempts had like to have been killed more than to be fine; but some unforeseen disaster once. At last the victory declared for the demolished each as soon as projected. I two adventurers; but the Dwarf lost his leg. i endeavoured to take the advantage of The Dwarf had now lost an arm, a leg, every disappointment to improve their and an eye, while the Giant was without good sense, in proportion as they were a single wound. Upon which he cried out frustrated in ambition. “You see, my to his little companion, ‘My little hero, this children," cried I, “how little is to be got is glorious sport! let us get one victory by attempts to impose upon the world in more, and then we shall have honour for coping with our betters. Such as are ever.'— 'No,' cries the Dwarf, who was by poor, and will associate with none but the this time grown wiser, 'no, I declare off; rich, are hated by those they avoid, and I'll fight no more: for 1 find in every battle despised by those they follow.
Unequal that you get all the honours and rewards, combinations are always disadvantageous but all the blows fall upon me.'”. to the weaker side: the rich having the
I was going to moralize this fable, when pleasure, and the poor the inconveniences our attention was called off to a warm
But come, Dick, dispute between my wife and Mr. Burchell, my boy, and repeat the fable that you were upon my daughters' intended expedition to reading to-day, for the good of the com- town. My wife very strenuously insisted
upon the advantages that would result “Once upon a time,” cried the child, from it: Mr. Burchell, on the contrary,
that result from them.
dissuaded her with great ardour; and I versation with me, sir," replied my daugh. stood neuter. His present dissuasions ter," has ever been sensible, modest, and seemed but the second part of those which pleasing. As to aught else—no, never. were received with so ill a grace in the Once, indeed, I remember to have heard morning. The dispute grew high; while him say, he never knew a woman who poor Deborah, instead of reasoning could find merit in a man that seemed stronger, talked louder, and at last was poor.”—“Such, my dear," cried I, “is the obliged to take shelter from a defeat in common cant of all the unfortunate or idle. clamour. The conclusion of her harangue, But I hope you have been taught to judge however, was highly displeasing to us all: properly of such men, and that it would be she knew, she said, of some who had their even madness to expect happiness from one own secret reasons for what they advised; who has been so very bad an economist of but, for her part, she wished such to his own. Your mother and I have non stay away from her house for the future. better prospects for you. The next winter,
Madam,” cried Burchell, with looks of which you will probably spend in town, great composure, which tended to inflame will give you opportunities of making a her the more,
as for secret reasons you more prudent choice.' are right: I have secret reasons, which I Wnat Sophia's reflections were upon forbear to mention, because you are not this occasion I cannot pretend to deterable to answer those of which I make no mine; but I was not displeased at the secret: Ibut I find my visits here are become bottom that we were rid of a guest from troublesome; I'll take my leave therefore whom I had much to fear. Our breach now, and perhaps come once more to take of hospitality went to my conscience a a final farewell when I am quitting the little; but I quickly silenced that monitor country.” Thus saying, he took up his by two or three specious reasons, which, | hat, nor could the attempts of Sophia, served to satisfy and reconcile me to my. whose looks seemed to upbraid his pre- self. The pain which conscience gives cipitancy, prevent his going.
the man who has already done wrong is When gone, we all regarded each other soon got over.
Conscience is a coward ; for some minutes with confusion. My and those faults it has not strength enough wife, who knew herself to be the cause, to prevent, it seldom has justice enough strove to hide her concern with a forced smile, and an air of assurance, which I was willing to reprove: “How, woman,” cried
CHAPTER XIV. I to her, “is it thus we treat strangers ? Fresh Mortifications, or a Demonstration that Is it thus we return their kindness? Be seeming Calamities may be reai Blessings. assured, my dear, that these were the The journey of my daughters to town harshest words, and to me the most un- was now resolved upon, Mr. Thornhill pleasing, that ever escaped your lips !"- having kindly promised to inspect their
Why would he provoke me then?” re- conduct himself, and inform us by letter plied she; “but I know the motives of his of their behaviour. But it was thought advice perfectly well. He would prevent indispensably necessary that their appear my girls from going to town, that he may ance should equal the greatness of their have the pleasure of my youngest daughter's expectations, which could not be done company here at home. But, whatever without expense. We debated therefore happens, she shall choose better company in full council what were the easiest than such low-lived fellows as he.”. methods of raising money, or, " Low-lived, my dear, do you call him?" properly speaking, what we could most cried I; "it is very possible we may mis- conveniently sell." The deliberation was take this man's character, for he seems, soon finished: it was found that our reupon some occasions, the most finished maining horse was utterly useless for the gentleman I ever knew. Tell me, Sophia, plough without his companion, and my girl, has he ever given you any secret equally unfit for the road, as wanting an
inces of his attachment?"-"His con- eye : it was therefore determined that we
should dispose of him for the purpose possessed me more favourably. His locks above mentioned, at the neighbouring of silver grey venerably shaded his temples, fair; and, to prevent imposition, that I and his green old age seemed to be the should go with him myself
. Though this result of health and benevolence. Howwas one of the first mercantile transactions ever, his presence did not interrupt our of my life, yet I had no doubt about ac- conversation : my friend and I discoursed quitting myself with reputation. The on the various turns of fortune we had opinion a man forms of his own prudence met ; the Whistonian controversy, my last is measured by that of the company he pamphlet, the archdeacon's reply, and the keeps: and as mine was most in the hard measure that was dealt me. But
family way, I had conceived no unfavour- our attention was in a short time taken able sentiments of my worldly wisdom. off, by the appearance of a youth, who, My wife, however, next morning, at entering the room, respectfully said someparting, after I had got some paces from thing softly to the old stranger. “Make the door, called me back to advise me, in no apologies, my child," said the old a whisper, to have all my eyes about me. man; “to do good is a duty we owe to
I had, in the usual forms, when I came all our fellow-creatures : take this, I wish to the fair
, put my horse through all his it were more ; but five pounds will relieve paces, but for some time had no bidders. your distress, and you are welcome.” At last a chapman approached, and after The modest youth shed tears of gratitude, he had for a good while examined the and yet his gratitude was scarce equal horse round, finding him blind of one to mine, I could have hugged the good ese, he would have nothing to say to old man in my arms, his benevolence bim; a second came up, but observing he pleased me so.
He continued to read, had a spavin, declared he would not take and we resumed our conversation, until bim for the driving home ; a third per- my companion, after some time, recollectceived he had a windgall, and would ing that he had business to transact in the bid no money; a fourth knew by his eye fair, promised to be soon back; adding, that he had the botts; a fifth wondered that he always desired to have as much what a plague I could do at the fair with of Dr. Primrose's company as possible. a blind, spavined, galled hack, that was the old gentleman, hearing my name only fit to be cut up for a dog kennel. mentioned, seemed to look at me with By this time, I began to have a most attention for some time; and when my hearty contempt for the poor animal my friend was gone, most respectfully desell
, and was almost ashamed at the manded if I was any way related to the approach of every customer : for though great Primrose, that courageous monoga
I did not entirely believe all the fellows mist, who had been the bulwark of the told me, yet I reflected that the number Church. Never did my heart feel sincerer of witnesses was a strong presumption rapture than at that moment. “Sir," they were right ; and St. Gregory, upon cried I, “ the applause of so good a man Good Works, professes himself to be of as I am sure you are, adds to that happi
ness in my breast which your benevolence . I was in this mortifying situation, when has already excited. You behold before a brother clergyman, an old acquaintance, you, sir, that Dr. Primrose, the monoga. who had also business at the fair, came mist, whom you have been pleased to call up, and, shaking me by the hand, pro- great. You here see that unfortunate posed adjourning to a public-house, and divine, who has so long, and it would ill
taking a glass of whatever we could get. become me to say, successfully, fought I readily closed with the offer, and enter against the deuterogamy of the age. ing an alehouse, we were shown into a Sir,” cried the stranger, struck with little back room, where there was only a awe, “I fear I have been too familiar, venerable old man, who sat wholly intent but you'll forgive my curiosity, sir : I beg over a large book, which he was reading. pardon,' -“Sir," cried I, grasping his I never in my life saw a figure that pre: hand, “ you are so far from displeasing
the same opinion.