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, ribands, bugles, and catgut ; my next day I had the satisfaction of finding wife herself retained a passion for her crim- my daughters, at their own request, enison paduasoy, because I formerly hap- ployed in cutting up their trains into Sunpened to say it became her.
day waistcoats for Dick and Bill, the two The first Sunday, in particular, their little ones; and, what was still more satisbehaviour served to mortify me. I had factory, the gowns seemed improved by desired my girls the preceding night to be this curtailing. dressed early the next day; for I always lored to be at church a good while before
CHAPTER V. the rest of the congregation. They punc- A new and great Acquaintance introduced. tually obeyed my directions; but when we What we place most Hopes upon, generally were to assemble in the morning at break- prozes most fatal. fase, down came my wife and daughters, At a small distance from the house, my dressed out in all their former splendour; predecessor had made a seat, har hair plastered up with pomatum, shadowed by a hedge of hawthorn and their faces patched to taste, their trains honeysuckle. Here, when the weather bundled up in a heap behind, and rustling was fine and our labour soon finished, at every motion. I could not help smiling we usually sat together, to enjoy an exat their vanity, particularly that of my wife, tensive landscape in the calm of the evenfrom whom I expected more discretion. ing. Here, too, we drank tea, which now In this exigence, therefore, my only re- was become an occasional banquet; and, scurce was to order my son, with an im- as we had it but seldom, it diffused a new portant air, to call our coach. The girls joy, the preparations for it being made were amazed at the command ; but I re- with no small share of bustle and cererated it with more solemnity than before. mony. On these occasions, our two little " Sarely, my dear, you jest,” cried my ones always read for us, and they were reaile ; “ we can walk it perfectly well: gularly served after we had done. Some* want no coach to carry us now." times, to give a variety to our amusements, "You mistake, child,” returned I, we the girls sang to the guitar; and while b want a coach ; for if we walk to church they thus formed a little concert
, my wife a this trim, the very children in the parish and I would stroll down the sloping field, ni boot after us.”_" Indeed,” replied that was embellished with blue-bells and 37 pife, “I always imagined that my centaury, talk of our children with rapture, harles was fond of seeing his children and enjoy the breeze that wafted both
at and handsome about him.”_" You health and harmony. ay be as neat as you please,” interrupted In this manner we began to find that 1, "and I shall love you the better for it ; every situation in life may bring its own ut all this is not neatness, but frippery. peculiar pleasures : every morning waked These rufflings, and pinkings, and patch. us to a repetition of toil; but the evening ogs willonly make us hated by all the wives repaid it with vacant hilarity.
bir neighbours. No, my children,” It was about the beginning of autumn, Tigged I, more gravely, " those gowns on a holiday-for I kept such as intervals asy be altered into something of a plainer of relaxation from labour—that I had
; for hnery is very unbecoming in us, drawn out my family to our usual place bo want the means of decency. I do of amusement, and our young musicians Tot know whether such flouncing and began their usual concert. As we were shredding is becoming even in the rich, if thus eng ed, we saw a stag bound nimbly me visider, upon a moderate calculation, by, within about twenty paces of where hat the nakedness of the indigent world we were sitting, and by its panting it = stir be clothed from the trimmings of seemed pressed by the hunters. We had the vain."
not much time to reflect upon the poor This remonstrance had the proper effect: animal's distress, when we perceived the they went with great composure, that very dogs and horsemen come sweeping along Estant, to change their dress; and the at some distance behind, and making the
very path it had taken. I was instantly trary, gave him a question or two from the for returning in with my family ; but ancients, for which he had the satisfaction either curiosity, or surprise, or some more of being laughed at. My little ones were hidden motive, held my wife and daugh- no less busy, and fondly stuck close to ters to their seats. The huntsman who the stranger. All my endeavours could rode foremnost passed us with great swift. scarce keep their dirty fingers from hand ness, followed by four or five persons ling and tarnishing the lace on his clothes more, who seemed in equal haste. At and lifting up the Haps of his pocket-boles last, a young gentleman of more genteel to see what was there. At the approach appearance than the rest came forward, of evening he took leave; but not till be and for a while regarding us, instead of had requested permission to renew hi pursuing the chase, stopped short, and visit, which, as he was our landlord, w giving his horse to a servant who attended, most readily agreed to. approached us with a careless superior air. As soon as he was gone, my wife called He seemed to want no introduction, but a council on the conduct of the day. She was going to salute my daughters as one was or opinion, that it was a most fortu. certain of a kind reception; but they had nate hit; for she had known even strange early learnt the lesson of looking presump- things than that brought to bear. Si tion out of countenance. Upon which he hoped again to see the day in which v let us know that his name was Thornhill, might hold up our heads with the best and that he was owner of the estate that them; and concluded, she protested sl lay for some extent round us. Ile again could see no reason why the two Mi therefore offered to salute the female part Wrinklers should marry great fortune of the family, and such was the power of and her children get none. As this la fortune and fine clothes, that he found no argument was directed to me, I proteste second repulse. As his address, though I could see no reason for it neither, no confident, was easy, we soon became more why Mr. Simpkins got the ten thousan familiar; and, perceiving musical instru. pound prize in the lottery, and we say ments lying near, he begged to be favoured down with a blank. “I protest, Charles,"
As I did not approve of such cried my wife, “this is the way you alway disproportioned acquaintances, I winked damp my girls and me when we are in upon my daughters in order to prevent spirits. Tell me, Sophy, my dear, what their compliance; but my hint was coun. do you think of our new visitor? Don't teracted by one from their mother; so you think he seemed to be good-natured?" that, with a cheerful air, they gave us a -“Immensely so, indeed, mamma, favourite song of Dryden's. Mr. Thorn- plied she: “I think he has a great deal hill seemed highly delighted with their per- to say upon everything, and is never at a formance and choice, and then took up the loss; and the more trifling the subject, guitar himself. He played but very indif- the more he has to say. -“ Yes,” cried ferently; however, my eldest daughter re- Olivia,“ he is well enough for a man; bul, paid his former applause with interest, and for my own part, I don't much like himi, assured him that his tones were louder he is so extremely impudent and familiar; than even those of her master. At this but on the guitar he is shocking.” These compliment he bowed, which she returned two last speeches I interpreted by conwith a curtsey. He praised her taste, and traries. I found by this, that Sophia in she commended his understanding; an ternally despised, as much as Olivia se age could not have made them better ac. cretly admired him. “Whatever may be quainted : while the fond mother too, your opinions of him, my children,” cried equally happy, insisted upon her landlord's Í,“ to confess the truth, he has not prestepping in, and tasting a glass of her possessed me in his favour. Disprogooseberry. The whole family seemed portioned friendships ever terminate in earnest to please him: my girls attempted disgust; and I thought, notwithstar ling to entertain him with topics they thought all his case, that he seemed perfectly sen. most modern; while Moses, on the con- sible of the distance between us. Let us
with a song.
keep to companions of our own rank. i was known in our neighbourhood by the There is no character more contemptible character of the poor gentleman, that than a man that is a fortune-hunter; and would do no good when he was young, I can see no reason why fortune-hunting though he was not yet thirty. He would Honen should not be contemptible too. at intervals talk with great good sense ; Thus, at best, we shall be contemptible if but, in general, he was fondest of the
views are honourable; but if they be company of children, whom he used to otherwise !-I should shudder but to think call harmless little men. He was famous, of that. It is true, I have no apprehen. I found, for singing them ballads, and was from the conduct of my children ; telling them stories, and seldom went out that I think there are some from his cha- without something in his pockets for them racter." I would have proceeded, but -a piece of gingerbread, or an halfpenny for the interruption of a servant from tlie , whistle. He generally came for a few. Spire, who, with his compliments, sent days into our neighbourhood once a year, 3 a side of venison, and a promise to dine and lived upon the neighbours' hospitality. with us some days after. This well-timed He sat down to supper among us, and my present pleaded more powerfully in his wife was not sparing of her gooseberryour than anything I had to say could : wine. The tale went round; he sung us orate. I therefore continued silent, old songs, and gave the children the story et sned with just having pointed out of the Buck of Beverland, with the history danar, and leaving it to their own discre.. of Patient Grissel, the adventures of Cat. go to avoid it. That virtue which re- skin, and then Fair Rosamond's Bower. pares to be ever guarded is scarce worth Our cock, which always crew at eleven, the sentinel.
now told us it was time for repose ; but
an unforeseen difficulty started about lodg. CHAPTER VI.
ing the stranger--all our beds were al. The Happiness of a Country Fireside. ready taken up, and it was too late to As we carried on the former dispute send him to the next alehouse. In this with some degree of warmth, in order to dilemma, little Dick offered him his part 2. conmo late matters, it was universally of the bed, if his brother Moses would let Teed that we should have a part of the him lie with him : “And I,” cried Bill, Tilson for supper; and the girls under- " will give Mr. Burchell my part, if my crois the task with alacrity. “I am sisters will take me to theirs." _“Well $ Ty," cried I, “ that we have no neigh- done, my good children,” cried I,“ hospar cm stranger to take part in this good pitality is one of the first Christian duties. sheer: feasts of this kind acquire a double The beast retires to its shelter, and the relish from hospitality.”—“ Bless me," bird flies to its nest; but helpless man ched my wife," here comes our good can only find refuge from his fellow-creafriend Mr. Burchell, that saved our Sophia, ture. The greatest stranger in this world and that run you down fairly in the argu
was He that came to save it. He never “ Confute mein argument, had a house, as if willing to see what d!" cried I. “You mistake there, hospitality was left remaining among us. my dear; I believe there are but few that Deborah, my dear,” cried I to my wife, cor do that : I never dispute your abilities "give those boys a lump of sugar each ; 2 naking a goose-pie, and I beg you'll and let Dick's be the largest, because he lare argument to me. As I spoke, poor spoke first." Mr. Burchell entered the house, and was In the morning early I called out my rele med by the family, who shook him ' whole family to help at saving an afterbeartily by the band, while little Dick growth of hay, and our guest offering his <sciously reached him a chair.
assistance, he was accepted among the I was pleased with the poor man's number. Our labours went on lightly ; friendship for two reasons: because I knew we turned the swath to the wind. I went that he wanted mine, and I knew him to foremost, and the rest followed in due be friendly as far as he was able. He succession. I could not avoid, however,
observing the assiduity of Mr. Burchell in eyes, yet the animal itself finds the apart assisting my daughter Sophia in her part ment sufficiently lightsome. And, to con of the task. When he had finished his fess a truth, this man's mind seems fitted own, he would join in hers, and enter into to his station ; for I never heard any one a close conversation; but I had too good more sprightly than he was to day, wher. an opinion of Sophia's understanding, and he conversed with you.”—This was said was too well convinced of her ambition, without the least design ; however, it exto be under any uneasiness from a man of cited a blush, which she strove to cover broken fortune. When we were finished by an affected laugh, assuring him that for the day, Mr. Burchell was invited as she scarce took any notice of what he on the night before, but he refused, as he said to her, but that she believed he might was to lie that night at a neighbour's, to once have been a very fine gentleman. whose child he was carrying a whistle. The readiness with which she undertook When gone, our conversation at supper to vindicate herself, and her blushing, turned upon our late unfortunate guest. were symptoms I did not internally ap. “What a strong instance,” said I, is prove ; but I repressed my suspicions. that poor man of the miseries attending As we expected our landlord the next a youth of levity and extravagance. He day, my wife went to make the venison by no means wants sense, which only pasty. Moses sat reading, while I taught serves to aggravate his former folly. Poor the little ones. My daughters seemed forlorn creature ! where are now the re- equally busy with the rest ; and I observed vellers, the flatterers, that he could once them for a good while cooking something inspire and command ! Gone, perhaps, over the fire. I at first supposed they to attend the bagnio pander, grown rich were assisting their mother, but little Dick by his extravagance. They once praised informed me, in a whisper, that they were hiin, and now they applaud the pander : making a wash for the face. Washes of their former raptures at his wit are now all kinds I had a natural antipathy to; converted into sarcasms at his folly: he is for I knew that, instead of mending the poor, and perhaps deserves poverty; for complexion, they spoil it. I therefore he has neither the ambition to be inde. | approached my chair by sly degrees to pendent, nor the skill to be useful.” the fire, and grasping the poker, as if it Prompted perhaps by some secret reasons, wanted mending, seemingly by accident I delivered this observation with too much overturned the whole composition, and it acrimony, which my Sophia gently re- was too late to begin another. proved. “Whatsoever his former conduct may have been, papa, his circumstances
CHAPTER VII. should exempt him from censure now.
A Town Wit described. The dullest Fellcas His present indigence is a sufficient punish
may learn to be comical for a Night or Tre. ment for former folly; and I have heard WHEN the morning arrived on which wc my papa himself say, that we should never were to entertain our young landlord, it strike one unnecessary blow at a victim, may be easily supposed what provisions over whom Providence holds the scourge were exhausted to make an appearance. of its resentment.”—“You are right, It may also be conjectured that my wife Sophy,” cried my son Moses ; "and one and daughters expanded their gayest plu: of the ancients finely represents so mali- mage on this occasion. Mr. Thornhill cious a conduct, by the attempts of a rustic came with a couple of friends, his chap, to flay Marsyas, whose skin, the fable lain and feeder. The servants, who were tells us, had been wholly stripped off by numerous, he politely ordered to the next another. Besides, I don't know if this alehouse : but my wise, in the triumph of poor man's situation be so bad as my her heart, insisted on entertaining them father would represent it. We are not to all ; for which, by the by, our family was judge of the feelings of others by what pinched for three weeks after. we might feel in their place. However Burchell had hinted to us the day before, dark the habitation of the mole to our that he was making some proposals
marriage to Miss Wilmot, my son George's part is less than the whole.”—“I grant forener mistress, this a good deal damped that too,” cried Moses; “it is but just and se heartiness of his reception : but acci- reasonable."— "I hope," cried the Squire, dent in some measure relieved our em- "you will not deny, that the two angles barrassment; for one of the company of a triangle are equal to two right ones. leppening to mention her name, Mr. -“Nothing can be plainer, returned Toomhill observed with an oath, that he't'other, and looked round with his usual never knew anything more absurd than importance. “Very well,” cried the cling such a fright a beauty ; "For, Squire, speaking very quick, “the prestrike me ugly, continued he, “if I misses being thus settled, I proceed to suald not find as much pleasure in observe, that the concatenation of selfcbwasing my mistress by the information existences, proceeding in a reciprocal dia lamp under the clock of St. Dunstan's.” duplicate ratio, naturally produce a pro4: this he laughed, and so did we: the blematical dialogism, which, in some ats of the rich are ever successful. Olivia, measure, proves that the essence of spiri
, could not avoid whispering, loud tuality may be referred to the second preenough to be heard, that he had an infinite dicable.” * Hold, hold !" cried the fai of humour.
other, “I deny that: do you think that I can Aber dinner, I began with my usual thus tamely submit to such heterodox docinate the Church : for this I was thanked trines ?”.
_“What !” replied the Squire, * the chaplain, as he said the Church as if in a passion, not submit! Answer ab the only mistress of his affections.
lain question : Do you think "Cone, tell us honestly, Frank," said the Aristotle right when he says that relatives Fure, with his usual archness, “suppose are related ?”—“Undoubtedly,” replied 2. Church, your present mistress, dressed the other. —"If so, then, cried the
lawn sleeves, on one hand, and Miss Squire, answer me directly to what I siphia, with no lawn about her, on the propose : Whether do you judge the ana
her, which would you be for ? ” —“For İytical investigation of the first part of my buth to be sure," cried the chaplain. enthymem deficient secundum quoad, or “Kisht, Frank,” cried the Squire ; " for quoad minus ; and give me your reasons say this glass suffocate me, but a fine girl -give me your reasons, I say, directly." worth all the priestcraft in the creation ! “I protest, cried Moses, “I don't For what are tithes and tricks but an im- ' rightly comprehend the force of your prestian, all a confounded imposture, and reasoning ; but if it be reduced to one A can prove it.”'_“I wish you would,” simple proposition, I fancy it may then Cakel my son Moses; " and I think," con- have an answer.' —“Oh, sir,” cried the inued he, “that I should be able to answer Squire, “ I am your most humble servant ; 62.”—“Very well, sir,” cried the Squire, I find you want me to furnish you with who immediately smoked him, and winked argument and intellects too. No, sir, in the rest of the company to prepare us there I protest you are too hard for me.' - the sport; “ if you are for a cool argu- This effectually raised the laugh against Fent upon that subject, I am ready to poor Moses, who sat the only dismal figure accept the challenge. And, first, whether in a group of merry faces; nor did he offer are you for managing it analogically or a single syllable more during the whole ta ogically ?”—“ I am for managing it entertainment. Ionally," cried Moses, quite happy at But though all this gave me no pleasure, beg permitted to dispute. "Good it had a very different effect upon Olivia, 3an," cried the Squire ; “and, firstly, who mistook it for humour, though but a * Lie first, I hope you'll not deny, that mere act of the memory. She thought him, atatever is, is. 'If you don't grant me therefore, a very fine gentleman; and car, I can go no further.”—“Why,” re- such as consider what powerful ingredients temed Moses, “I think I may grant that; a good figure, fine clothes, and fortune are at make the best of it." _“I hope, too, in that character, will easily forgive her. returned the other, “you'll grant that a Mr. Thornhill, notwithstanding his real