669. Spinus his choyce.

Spinus would wed, but he would have a wench
That hath all tongues, Italian, Spanish, French,
But I disswade him; for if she hath any,
She hath enough, if two, she hath two too many.

670. Backbiters.

When Codrus catches fleas, what e'r he ailes,
He kils them with his teeth, not with his nails;
Saying, that man by man may blamelesse go,
If every one would use Backbiters so.

671. In Salonum.

Oft in the night Salonus is inclin'd,

To rise and pisse, and does as oft break wind: If's Urinall be glasse, as 'tis no doubt,

I wonder it so many cracks holds out.

672, In Leonatum.

The filthiest, the fowlest, deformedst lasse,

That is, will be, I think or ever was,

Leonatus loves; wherewith should she him draw, Except as she's like jet, he be like straw?

673. Nosce teipsum.

Walking and meeting one not long ago,
I ask't who 'twas, he said he did not know:
I said, I know thee; so said he, I you,

But he that knows himselfe I never knew.

674. On old Silvius.

Silvius by Simony a living got,

And he liv'd well upon it; pray why not?
For he the poor did pill, the rich did lurch,
And so became a pillar of the Church.

675. On Perfumes.

They that smell least, smell best: which intimates, They smell like Beasts that smell like Civet Cats.

676. Arcades ambo..

Fack and Dick both with one woman dealt
So long till she the pains of woman felt:
Now Dick he thinks to put a trick on Fack,
And Fack again to hang it on Dicks back:
Which got the Child, it seems à double case,
It hath so like (they say) Facks nose, Dicks face.
But by both marks my judgement should be quick,
Et vitulo tu dignus Fack & Dick.

677. On Punchin.

Give me a reason why men call

Punchin a dry plant-Animall.

Because as plants by water grow,

Punchin by Beer and Ale spreads so.

678. Ne fide colori.

When Bassa walks abroad she paints her face, And then she would be seen in every place, For then your Gallants who so e'r they are, Under a colour will account her faire.

679. In Flavium.

When Flavius once would needs praise Tin,
His brain could bring no reasons in ;

But what his belly did bethink,
Platters for meat, and Pots for drink.

680. Ad Quintum.

Thy lawfull wife, fair Lelia needs must be,
For she was forc'd by Law to marry thee.

681. In Virtutem.

Vertue we praise, but practise not her good,
(Athenian-like) we act not what we know ;
So many do talk of Robin-Hood,
Who never yet shot arrow in his bow.

682. A good wits diet.

That which upholds our tottering walls of flesh,
Is food and that which doth our wits refresh,
Is wholsome study: for like stronger fare,
Be solid Arts, but sweet meats Poems are..

683. On Womens tongue.

Things that be bitter, bitterer than gall,
Physitians say, are alwayes Physicall.
Then womens tongues, if into powder beaten,
And in a potion, or a pill be eaten,
Nothing more bitter is. I therefore muse,
That womens tongues in Physick they ne'r use:
There's many men who live unquiet lives,
Would spare that bitter member of their wives.
Then prove them Doctor, use them in a pill;
Things oft help sick men, that do sound men kill.

684. A proper comparison.

As there are three blue beans in a blue bladder,
As there are thrice three rounds in a long ladder,
As there are three nooks in a corner'd cap,
And three corners and one in a map,

Even so like all these,

There are three Universities.

685. Of Death.

He that fears death, or mourns it in the just,
Shews of the resurrection little trust.

686. Woman.

Woman was once a rib, (as truth hath said)
Else sith her tongue runs wide from every point,
I should have dream'd her substance had bin made
Of Adams whirle-bone, when 'twas out of joynt.

687 Peperit, &c.

Nels husband said, she brought him nought but toys,
But yet (without his help) she brings him boys.

688. Insipiens..

Two friends discoursing that together stood,

The one enquiring if the other could
Tell whether such a man were wise?

He answer'd no, but he is otherwise.

689. Romes wifelesse Clergy.

Long did I wonder, and I wonder❜d much,
Rome should her Clergy that contentment grudge
As to debar them of their proper due ;

What, doth she all with continence indue?

O no; they find a womans lips so dainty,

They'l tye themselves from one, 'cause they'l have twenty.

690. On Eves Apples.

Eve for thy fruit thou gav'st too dear a price,

What? for an apple give a Paradise ?

If now adayes of fruit such gaines were made,
A Coster-monger were a devilish trade.

691. Will the Perfumer.

Will the Perfumer met me in the street,
I stood amaz'd, he ask'd me what I meant ;
In faith, said I, your gloves are very sweet,
And yet your breath doth cast a stronger sent.