His Notions fitted things fo well,
That which was which he could not tell
But oftentimes miftook the one
For t' other, as Great Clerks have done.
He could reduce all things to Acts,
And knew their Natures by Abftracts;
Where Entity and Quiddity,
The Ghoft of defunct Bodies fly;
Where Truth in Perfon does appear,
Like Words congeal'd in Northern Air.
He knew what's what, and that's as high
As Metaphyfick Wit can fly.
In School-Divinity as able
As he that hight Irrefragable,
A fecond Thomas, or at once
'To name them all, another Duns.
Profound in all the Nominal
And Real ways beyond them all
For he a Rope of Sand could twist
As tough as Learned Sorbonift.
And weave fine Cobwebs, fit for Scull:
That's empty when the Moon is full;' a
Such as take Lodgings in a Head
That's to be let Unfurnished..
He could raife Scruples dark and nice,
And after folve 'em in a trice:
As if Divinity had catch'd
The Itch, on purpose to be fcratch'd;
Or, like a Mountebank, did wound
And ftab her self with Doubts profound, T
Only to fhew with how small pain
The Sores of Faith are curd again;
Altho' by woful Proof we find,..
They always leave a Scar behind.
He knew the Seat of Paradife,
Could tell in what Degree it lies:
And, as he was difpos'd, could prove it,
Below the Moon, or else above it.
What Adam dreamt of when his Bride
Came from her Clofet in his fide:
Whether the Devil tempted her
By a High Dutch Interpreter:
If either of them had a Navel;
Who firft made Mufick malleable:
Whether the Serpent at the Fall
Had Cloven Feet, or none at all.
All this without a Glofs, or Comment,
He would unriddle in a moment
proper Terms, fuch as Men fmatter
When they throw out and miss the Matter.
For his Religion it was fit
To match his Learning and his Wit:
'Twas Prefbyterian true Blue,
For he was of that ftubborn Crew
Of Errant Saints, whom all Men grant
To be the true Church Militant :
Such as do build their Faith upon
The holy Text of Pike and Gun
Decide all Controverfie by
Infallible Artillery
And prove their Doctrine Orthodox
By Apoftolick Blows aud Knocks
Call Fire and Sword and Defolation,
A godly-thorough-Reformation,
Which always must be carry'd on,
And ftill be doing, never done:
As if Religion were intended
For nothing else but to be mended.
A Sect, whose chief Devotion lies
In odd perverse Antipathies:
In falling out with that or this,
And finding fomewhat still amifs:
More peevish, cross, and fplenetick,
Than Dog distract, or Monkey fick.
That with more care keep Holy-day
The wrong, than others the right way:
Compound for Sins, they are inclin'd to,
By damning thofe they have no mind to;
Still fo perverfe and oppofite,
As if they worship'd God for fpight.
The felf-fame thing they will abhor
One way, and long another for.
Free-will they one way difavow,
Another, nothing else allow.
All Piety confifts therein
In them, in other Men all Sin.
Rather than fail, they will defie
That which they love moft tenderly;
Quarrel with Minc'd Pies, and difparage
Their best and dearest Friend Plum-Porridge
Fat Pig and Goofe it felf oppofe,
And Blafpheme Custard through the Nofe.
Th' Apostles of this fierce Religion,
Like Mahomet's, were Afs and Widgeon,
To whom our Knight by fast Instinct
Of Wit and Temper was fo linkt,
As if Hypocrifie and Non-fence
Had got th Advowson of his Confcience.
Thus was he gifted and accouter'd,
We mean onth' infide, not the outward.
That next of all we fhall difcufs
Then liften, Sirs, it follows, thus.
His tawny Beard was th' equal Grace
Both of his Wifdom and his Face;
In Cut and Dye fo like a Tile,
A fudden View it would beguile:
The
upper part thereof was Whey,
The nether Orange mixt with Grey. dit! This hairy Meteor did denounce
The Fall of Scepters and of Crowns; t
|