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I wish my self a Pseudo-Prophet, But fure some Mischief will come of it ; Unless by Providential Wit, Or Force, we averruncate it. For what Design, what Interest Can Beast have to encounter Beaft? They fight for no espoused Cause, Frail Privilege, Fundamental Laws; Nor for a thorough Reformation, Nor Covenant, nor Protestation; Nor for free Liberty of Conscience, Nor Lords and Commons Ordinances; Nor for the Courch, nor for Church-Lands, To get them in their own no Hands; Nor evil Counsellours to bring To Justice that feduce the King; Nor for the Worship of us Men, Though we have done as much for them. Th’ Ægyptians worship'd Dogs, and for Their Faith made internecine War. Others ador'd a Rat, and some For that Church suffer'd Martyrdome.
The Indians fought for the Truth
Of th’ Elephant, and Monkey's Tooth:
And many, to defend that Faith,
Fought it out mordicus to Death.
But no Beast ever was fo slight,
For Man, as for his God to fight.
They have more Wit, alas! and know
Themselves and us better than fo.
But we, who only do infuse
The Rage in them like Boute-feus.
'Tis our Example that instills
In them th' Infection of our Ills.
For as some late Philosophers
Have well observ'd, Beasts that converse
With Man, take after him, as Hogs
Get Pigs all th’ Year, and Bitches Dogs.
Just so, by our Example, Cattel
Learn to give one another Battel.
We read in Nero's time, the Heathen,
When they destroy'd the Christian Brethren,
They few'd them in the Skins of Bears,
And then set Dogs about their Ears :
From whence, no doubt, th' Invention came
Of this lewd Antichristian Game.
To this, quoth Ralpho, Verily,
The point seems very plain to be.
It is an Antichristian Game,
Unlawful both in Thing and Name.
First for the Name, the word Bear-Baiting
Is carnal, and of Man's creating :
For certainly there's no such Word
In all the Scripture on Record,
Therefore unlawfull and a Sin;
And so is (secondly) the Thing.
A vile Assembly ’tis, that can
No more be prov'd by Scripture, than
Provincial, Classick, National,
Mere Human Creature-Cobwebs all.
Thirdly, It is Idolatrous.
For when Men run a-whoring thus
With their Inventions, whatsoe’er
The thing be, whether Dog or Bear,
It is Idolatrous and Pagan,
No less than worshiping of Dagon.
Quoth Hudibras, I smell a Rat;
Ralpho, thou dost prevaricate.
For though the Thesis which thou lay'ft
Be true ad amusim, as thou say'st,
(For that Bear-Baiting should appear
Jure Divino lawfuller
Than Synods are, thou doft deny,
Totidem Verbis ; fo do I:)
Yet there's a Fallacy in this,
For if by fly Homæofis,
Tuffis procrepitu, an Art
Under a Cough to slur a F---t,
Thou wouldft Sophistically imply
Both are unlawful, I deny.
And I (quoth Ralpho) do, not doubt
But Bear-Baiting may be made out
In Gospel-times, as lawful as is
Provincial or Parochial Clasis :
And that both are so near of Kin,
And like in all, as well as Sin,
That put them in a Bag and shake 'em,
Your self o'th sudden would mistake 'em,
And not know which is which, unless
You measure by their Wickedness:
For 'tis not hard to imagine whether
O'th' two is worst, though I name neither.
Quoth Hudibras, Thou offer'st much,
But art not able to keep touch,
Mira de lente, as 'tis i' th' Adage,
, to make a Leek a Cabbage,
Thou'lt be at best but fuba Bull
Or Shear Swine, All Cry and no Wool;
For what can Synods have at all
With Bears that's Analogical ?
Or what relation has debating
Of Church-Affairs with Bear-Baiting
A just Comparison still is
Of things ejusdem generis.
And then what Genus rightly doth
Include and comprehend them both?
If Animal, both of us inay
As justly pass for Bears as they ;
For we are Animals no less,
Although of different Speciefes.