But here our Authors make a Doubt,
Whether he were more Wife, or Stout.
Some hold the one, and fome the other,
But how foe'er they make a Pother,
The diff'rence was fo fmall, his Brain
Outweigh'd his Rage but half a Grain.
Which made fome take him for a Tool
That Knaves do work with, call'd a Fool;
For't has been held by many, that
As Mountaigne, playing with his Cat,
Complains the thought him but an Afs,
Much more she would Sir Hudibras,
(For that's the Name our valiant Knight
To all his Challenges did write.)
But they're miftaken very much,
'Tis plain enough he was no fuch
We grant, altho' he had much Wit,
H' was very fhie of ufing it;
As being loth to wear it out,
And therefore bore it not about;
Unless on Holy-Days, or fo,
As Men their beft Apparel do.

Befide, 'tis known he could fpeak Greek,
As naturally as Pigs fqueek:

That Latin was no more difficile,
Than to a Blackbird 'tis to whistle:
Being rich in both, he never fcanted
His Bounty unto fuch as wanted;
But much of either would afford

To many, that had not one Word.
For Hebrew Roots, although th' are found
To flourish moft in barren Ground,

He had fuch Plenty, as fuffic'd

To make fome think him circumcis'd:
And truly fo he was, perhaps,

Not as a Profelyte, but but for Claps.
He was in Logick a great Critick,
Profoundly skill'd in Analytick

He could diftinguish, and divide

A Hair 'twixt South and South West fide:
On either which he would difpute,

Confute, change hands, and ftill confute;

He'd undertake to prove by force

Of Argument, a Man's no Horfe 8 21

5

He'd

He'd prove a Buzzard is no Fowl,
And that a Lord may be an Owl;
A Calf an Alderman, a Goose a fuftice,
And Rooks Committee-Men and Trustees.
He'd run in Debt by Difputation,
And pay with Ratiocination.

All this by Syllogifm, true

In Mood and Figure, he would do.
For Rhetorick, he could not ope
His Mouth, but out there flew a Trope:
And when he hap'ned to break off
I'th' middle of his Speech, or cough,
H' had hard Words, ready to fhew why,
And tell what Rules he did it by.
Elfe when with greatest Art he spoke,
You'd think he talk'd like other Folk.
For all a Rhetorician's Rules

Teach nothing but to name his Tools.
But, when he pleas'd to fhew't, his Speech
In loftinefs of Sound was rich;

A Babylonifh Dialect,

Which learned Pedants much affect 3

It was a Parti-colour'd Drefs

Of patch'd and Py-ball'd Languages:
'Twas English cut on Greek and Latin,
Like Fuftian Heretofore on Satin.

It had an odd promifcuous Toné,
As if h' had talk'd three parts in one,
Which made fome think when he did gabble
Th' had heard three Labourers of Babel;
Or Cerberus himfelf pronounce

A Leafh of Languages at once.

This he as volubly would vent!

As if his ftock would neer be fpent:

And truly, to fupport that Charge,

!

He had Supplies as vaft and large.

For he could coyn or counterfeit pada d
New Words, with little or no Wit: id Eve
Words fo debas'd and hard, no ftone:

Was hard enough to touch them on.
And when with hafty noife he fpoke 'em,
The Ignorant for current took 'em.
That had the Orator, who once

Did fill his Mouth with Pebble ftones'i

When

When he harangu'd, but known his Phrafe,
He would have us'd no other ways.
In Mathematicks he was greater

Then Tycho Brake, or Erra Pater:
For he by Geometrick Scale.

Could take the Size of Pots of Ale
Refolve by Signs and Tangents straight,
If Bread or Butter wanted weight;
And wifely tell what Hour ó' th' Day
The Clock does ftrike by Algebra.

Befide he was a fhrewd Philofopher;
And had read every Text and Glofs over;
What e'er the crabbed'ft Author hath,
He understood b'implicit Faithi :
What ever Sceptick could inquire for ;
For every why he had a wherefore:
Knew more than forty of them do,
As far as Words and Terms could go.
All which he understood by Rote,
And as occafion ferv'd would quote ;
No matter whether Right or Wrong:
They might be either faid or fung.