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OF old, when Scarron his companions invited,

Each guest brought his dish, and the feast was


If our landlord * supplies us with beef and with fish, Let each guest bring himself, and he brings the best


Our deant shall be venison, just fresh from the


Our Burket shall be tongue, with a garnish of brains,

Our Will § shall be wild-fowl, of excellent flavour, And Dick with his pepper shall heighten the sa


Our Cumberland's ¶ sweet-bread its place shall obtain,

And Douglas** is pudding, substantial and plain :

The master of St. James's coffee-house, where the doctor, and his friends he has characterised in this poem, occasionally dined.

+ Doctor Bernard, dean of Derry in Ireland. Mr. Edmund Burke.

Mr. William Burke, late secretary to general Conway, and member for Bedwin.

Mr. Richard Burke, collector of Granada.

Mr. Richard Cumberland, author of the West Indian, Fashionable Lover, the Brothers, and other dramatic pieces.

** Doctor Douglas, canon of Windsor, an inge

Our Garrick's a salad; for in him we see
Oil, vinegar, sugar, and saltness, agree:
To make out the dinner, full certain I am,
That Ridget is anchovy, and Reynolds is lamb
That Hickey's § a capon, and by the same rule,
Magnanimous Goldsmith a gooseberry-fool.
At a dinner so various, at such a repast,
Who'd not be a glutton, and stick to the last?
Here, waiter, more wine, let me sit while I'm able,
Till all my companions sink under the table;
Then, with chaos and blunders encircling my head,
Let me ponder, and tell what I think of the dead,
Here lies the good dean,|| re-united to earth,
Who mix'd reason with pleasure, and wisdom with
mirth :

If he had any faults, he has left us in doubt;
At least, in six weeks I could not find 'em out;
Yet some have declar'd, and it can't be denied 'em
That sly boots was cursedly cunning to hide 'em.
Here lies our good Edmund, ¶ whose genius was


We scarcely can praise it, or blame it, too much;

nious Scotch gentleman, who has no less distinguished himself as a citizen of the world, than a sound critic, in detecting several literary mistakes (or rather forgeries) of his countrymen; particularly Lauder on Milton, and Bower's History of the Popes.

David Garrick, Esq.

+ Counsellor John Ridge, a gentleman belonging to the Irish bar.

Sir Joshua Reynolds.

§ An emiment attorney. Vide page 191.


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Who, born for the universe, narrow'd his mind, And to party gave up what was meant for mankind; Though fraught with all learning, yet straining his


To persuade Tommy Townshend * to lend him a


Who, too deep for his hearers, still went on re


And thought of convincing while they thought of dining:

Though equal to all things, for all things unfit,
Too nice for a statesman, too proud for a wit;
For a patriot, too cool; for a drudge, disobedient;
And too fond of the right to pursue the expedient.
In short, 'twas his fate, unemploy'd, or in place, sir,
To eat mutton cold, and cut blocks with a razor.

Here lies honest William, whose heart was a mint,

While the owner ne'er knew half the good that was in't;

The pupil of impulse, it forc'd him along,

His conduct still right with his argument wrong;
Still aiming at honour, yet fearing to roam,
The coachman was tipsy, the chariot drove home;
Would you ask for his merits? alas! he had none;
What was good was spontaneous, his faults were
his own.

Here lies honest Richard, whose fate I must sigh at! Alas, that such frolic should now be so quiet! What spirits were his! what wit and what whim! Now breaking a jest, and now breaking a limb;

Mr. T. Townshend, member for Whitchurch. + Vide page 191.

Mr. Richard Burke; vide page 191. This gen

Now wrangling and grumbling to keep up the ball;
Now teazing and vexing, yet laughing at all.

In short, so provoking a devil was Dick,

That we wish'd him full ten times a day at old Nick ;
But, missing his mirth and agreeable vein,

As often we wish'd to have Dick back again.

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Here Cumberland* lies, having acted his parts,
The Terence of England, the mender of hearts;
A flattering painter, who made it his care

To draw men as they ought to be, not as they are.
His gallants are all faultless, his women divine,
And Comedy wonders at being so fine:
Like a tragedy-queen he has dizen❜d her out,
Or rather like Tragedy giving a rout.

His fools have their follies so lost in a crowd
Of virtues and feelings, that Folly grows proud ;
And coxcombs, alike in their failings alone,
Adopting his portraits, are pleas'd with their own.
Say, where has our poet this malady caught?
Or wherefore his characters thus without fault!
Say, was it that, vainly directing his view
To find out men's virtues, and finding them few,
Quite sick of pursuing each troublesome elf,
He grew lazy at last, and drew from himself?

Here Douglas + retires from his toils to relax,
The scourge of impostors, the terror of quacks:
Come, all ye quack bards, and ye quacking divines,
Come, and dance on the spot where your tyran t

tleman having slightly fractured one of his arms and legs, at different times, the doctor has rallied him on those accidents, as a kind of retributive justice for breaking his jests upon other people. * Vide page 191. + Ibid.

But now he is gone, and we want a detector,
Our Dodds* shall be pions, our Kenricks† shall


When satire and censure encircled his throne,

I fear'd for your safety, I fear'd for my own; Macpherson write bombast, and call it a style, Our Townshend § make speeches, and I shall compile;

New Lauders and Bowers the Tweed shall cros


No countryman living their tricks to discover;
Detection her taper shall quench to a spark,

And Scotchman meet Scotchman and cheat in the dark.

Here lies David Garrick,¶ describe him who can, An abridgment of all that was pleasant in man; As an actor, confest without rival to shine: As a wit, if not first, in the very first line: Yet, with talents like these, and an excellent heart, The man had his failings, a dupe to his art. Like an ill-judging beauty, his colours he spread, And beplaster'd with rouge his own natural red. On the stage he was natural, simple, affecting; 'Twas only that, when he was off, he was acting. With no reason on earth to go out of his way, He turn'd and he varied full ten times a day;

The Rev. Dr. Dodd.

+ Dr. Kenrick, who read lectures at the Devil Tavern, under the title of The School of Shakspeare.'

James Macpherson, esq. who lately, from the mere force of his style, wrote down the first poet of all antiquity.

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