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A fish-boat seems a grand flotilla,
To frighten Addington or Billy;
Appears a dreadful French invasion
T'annihilate the British nation.

Could tell, and never be mistaken,
What future oaks were in an acorn;
And even calculate, at pleasure,

The cubic inches they would measure,

Discover'd worlds within the pale
Of tip end of a tadpole's tail,

* A soldier in my glass's focus.

Somewhat similar to the microscope described by Mr. Adams.

* Leuwenhoek discovered in the eyes of the * Libellula 12544 triangular lenses, each forming * a distinct image of the object placed before it. * On turning your eye towards a soldier, by the ‘ aid of the mirror of the microscope, you will have

an army of pigmies, performing every motion * in the same instant of time.”

. Adama on the Microscope, p. 339.

My improvement of the glasses renders each # of these pigmies' as big as a Polyphemus.

And took possession of the same
In my good friend, Sir Joseph's name; *

And soon shall publish, by subscription,
A topographical description
Of worlds aforesaid, which shall go forth
In fool's cap folio, gilt, and so forth.

Could tell how far a careless fly
Might chance to turn this globe awry,
If flitting round, in giddy circuit,
With leg or wing, he kick or jerk it! 19

18 In my good friend, Sir Joseph's name.

This was immensely proper, as I propose colonising these hitherto Terre Incognita, and know of no person in existence, except myself, (who am now decrepid with age, and, alas, sadly povertystriken) whose scientific qualifications, knowledge of the coast, and well-known ardent zeal in the science of Tadpolism, so well entitle him to command such an important expedition.

19 With leg or wing, he kick or jerk it.

Could I command the years of a Nestor, “the indelible ink’ of a Lettsom, and the diligence of a Dutch commentator, I should still readily ackno

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ledge that my powers were totally inadequate to the task of eulogising, in proportion to their merits, the philosophical and literary performances of that profound sage Dr. James Anderson, LL.D. FRS.Scotland, (b) &c. &c. &c. &c. whose mysterious hints afforded a clue by which I have been enabled to add lustre to the present age, by many of my own sublime discoveries and inventions. In his derfi work called ‘Recreations in Agriculture. and Natural History,’ the Doctor says, among other things not less marvellous, ‘The mathematician can ‘demonstrate, with the most decisive certainty, “that no fly can alight on this globe which we in‘habit, without communicating motion to it ; and “he can ascertain, with the most accurate precision, “if so he choose to do,” (by the bye this sine gua mon part of the sentence is very beautiful, and not at all redundant) ‘what must be the exact amount of the “motion thus produced." Vol. ii. p. 350.

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More wonderful matter, perfected from hints of T}r. A.! After telling the public how to propagate rabbits with one ear, which would be no less useful than the renowned Gulliver's breed of “naked sheep,' the Doctor says, “I know another instance • of a dog, which was brought forth with three legs * only the fourth being wanting :' (which last curious. circumstance might possibly happen, if it had three legs only.) “It chanced to be a female ; she

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And matters conical have moulded,

For docking colts that were not foaled. **

* has had several litters of puppies, and among these * several individuals were produced that had the .* same defect with herself; but no pains were taken .* to perpetuate this breed by pairing them with “others of the same kind.' To be sure a most lamentable circumstance Vol. i. p. 68.

- * For docking colts that were not foaled.

Another Andersonianism. “It has been several times,’ says the Doctor, “taken notice of by natura* lists that in England, where the practice of dock‘ing horses very short, for a long time prevailed, ‘the horses naturally produced have fewer joints * in their tails than those of other countries; and, “ though I have never heard it noticed, that any “were produced, without having a tail, that re“quired to be docked, yet it may have often happen‘ed without being remarked ; for as it would not * be known, when old, from one that had been dock‘ed it might pass unobserved.” The Doctor afterowards appears surprised, (as well he might be, at such an extraordinary phenomenon) that many men, who have lost a leg, or an arm, have had children after the accident, and these, for the most part, free from any blemish But the above quotations are but puny crackers, compared with some great guns this writer can occasionally let off. Pray how then can the public withstand the artillery of the indignant Doctor when plied against the Metallic Tractors, those

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And could prepare a puny fry

Of yet unborn homunculi

fetty instruments of firetended mighty power which, as will hereafter more fully appear, have been the fruitful source of woes unnumbered to Doctor Caustic ;

At a time when I was all dismay for some new argument against Perkinism, my ingenious friend, to shew its falling reputation, among other conceptions equally happy and equally well founded, published in one of his ‘ Recreations,’ ‘ that the price * of the Tractors was now reduced to four guineas * the set,” when, in fact, no such thing was ever in contemplation. On the contrary, an advance has since taken place in their price to six guineas. Indeed I may challenge any son of Galen to exceed my worthy friend in intrepidity of this sort.

As to any ill-natured report Mr. Knight * may raise against the integrity of this philosopher, or any notion the public may entertain respecting his collusive operations with honest Forsyth, I shall merely assert that I would not believe a syllable to that effeet, were it ever so true. I confess, however, if Forsyth were my particular friend, I might whisper in the good man's ear, that so useful is it to preserve the good graces of that old

* See a Letter, published by White, from Thomas Andrews Knight, Esq to ijr. Anderson, in which he most uncourteously imputes unworthy motives to the said Doctor; and without any remorse, or the fear of shame before his eyes, talks about a private interest to answer, of a greater deficit of veracity, &c. T

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