ÆäÀÌÁö À̹ÌÁö
PDF
ePub

And I once offer'd, very prettily,

To patch up Frenchnien kill'd in Italy,

Pride may be picked from the composition of an upstart mushroom of a nobleman, impudence from a quack, knavery from a lawyer, moroseness from a monk, testiness from an old bachelor, peevishness from an old maid, in short, man. kind altered from what they are to what they ought to be, by a method at once cheap, practicable, easy and expeditious.

The only difficulty which has ever opposed itself to my carrying this sublime invention to the highest possible pitch of perfection, has been the almost utter impossibility of procuring any man, woman, or child, who is willing to become the subject of operation. Now if either of your worships would loan me his carcase to be picked to pieces, and again botched together in the manner above stated, provided the experiment should not fully succeed, I will engage to pay all the damages thereby accruing to community out of one tenth part of the profits of this publication.

29 The Gods of old folks could make young ones.

stricto Medea recludit

Ense senis jugulum: veteremque exire cruorem
Passa, replet succis. Quos postquam combibit Æson
Aut ore acceptos, aut vulnere barba, comæque
Canitie posita nigrum rapuere colorem.

Pulsa fugit macies,

This passage, with a condensation of thought and

Tho' shot, or stabb'd, or hack'd with fell blows, As wives patch coats when out at elbows!

Profoundly vers'd in chemic science,
I could bid matter's laws defiance;

felicity of expression peculiar to myself, I have thus happily hit into English.

Media cut the wither'd weasand
Of superannuated Eson,

Then fill'd him with the acrid juices
Of nettle-tops and flower-de-luces;
Till from the defunct carcase, lo!
Started a dashing Bond-Street beau!!

30 As well as when alive, I dare say!

The feats which our daily and monthly publications have informed us were achieved in Paris by this magician, before his arrival in England, must be fresh in the recollection of every person. The only reason why he did not exhibit dead people in hornpipes and contradances, while in London, was the want of proper subjects for Galvanic experiments. The tedious operation of English gallowscs in extinguishing life renders the bodies cold and unsusceptible of any excitement; whereas the clipping French Guillotine will instantly turn them over to the operator in a state susceptible of the slightest stimulus. This fact affords a scientific and conclusive argument in favour of the French Revolution.

And I once offer'd, very prettily,

To patch up Frenchnien kill'd in Italy,

Pride may be picked from the composition of an upstart mushroom of a nobleman, impudence from a quack, knavery from a lawyer, moroseness from a monk, testiness from an old bachelor, peevishness from an old maid, in short, mankind altered from what they are to what they ought to be, by a method at once cheap, practicable, easy and expeditious.

The only difficulty which has ever opposed itself to my carrying this sublime invention to the highest possible pitch of perfection, has been the almost utter impossibility of procuring any man, woman, or child, who is willing to become the subject of operation. Now if either of your worships would loan me his carcase to be picked to pieces, and again botched together in the manner above stated, provided the experiment should not fully succeed, I will engage to pay all the damages thereby accruing to community out of one tenth part of the profits of this publication.

[graphic]

Tho' shot, or stabb'd, or hack'd with fell blows, As wives patch coats when out at elbows!

Profoundly vers❜d in chemic science,
I could bid matter's laws defiance;

felicity of expression peculiar to myself, I have thus happily hit into English.

Media cut the wither'd weasand
Of superannuated Eson,

Then fill'd him with the acrid juices
Of nettle-tops and flower-de-luces;
Till from the defunct carcase, lo!
Started a dashing Bond-Street beau!!

30 As well as when alive, I dare say!

The feats which our daily and monthly publications have informed us were achieved in Paris by this magician, before his arrival in England, must be fresh in the recollection of every person. The only reason why he did not exhibit dead people in hornpipes and contradances, while in London, was the want of proper subjects for Galvanic experiments. The tedious operation of English gallowses in extinguishing life renders the bodies cold and unsusceptible of any excitement; whereas the clipping French Guillotine will instantly turn them over to the operator in a state susceptible of the slightest stimulus. This fact affords a scientific and conclusive argument in favour of the French Revolution.

Was up to Nature, or beyond her,

In mimic earthquakes, rain, and thunder? 37

31 In mimic earthquakes, rain, and thunder!

Chemistry furnishes us with a method of manufacturing artificial earthquakes, which will have all the great effects of those that are natural. The old fashioned receipt for an earthquake, however, of iron filings and sulphur mixed in certain proportions and immersed in the earth, I shall not take the trouble to state to your worships; as most of you have, perhaps, read Mr. Martin's. Philosophy nearly half through. But my plan is to make such an earthquake as no mortal, except Dr. Darwin and myself, ever supposed possible. The former gentleman made shift to explode the moon from the Southern Hemisphere of our earth, and I propose to forward another moon, by an artificial earthquake of my own invention, from the Northern Hemisphere, unless Dr. Young's comet, as mentioned in Note 10, should render such moon unnecessary. I will give your worships a specimen of Dr. Darwin's moon-producing earthquake, from 'Botanic Garden,' Canto ii.

Gnomes! How you shriek'd! When through the troubled air,

Roar'd the fierce din of elemental war;

'When rose the continents, and sunk the main, 'And earth's huge sphere exploding burst in twain.

'Gnomes! How you gaz'd! When from her wounded side,

Where now the south sea heaves its waste of

tide,

« ÀÌÀü°è¼Ó »