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Face. No, my smock rampart. The right is, my master Knows all, has pardoned me, and he will keep them; Doctor, 'tis true — you look — for all your figures : I sent for him indeed. Wherefore, good partners, Both he and she be satisfied : for here Determines the indenture tripartite 'Twixt Subtle, Dol, and Face. All I can do Is to help you over the wall, o' the back-side, Or lend you a sheet to save your velvet gown, Dol. Here will be officers presently, bethink you Of some course suddenly to escape the dock: For thither you will come else. - [Loud knocking.]— Hark you,
thunder. Sub. You are a precious fiend ! Offi. [Without. Open the door.
Face. Dol, I am sorry for thee, i' faith; but hear'st thou?
It shall go hard but I will place thee somewhere :
Thou shalt have my letter to Mistress Amo-
Dol. Hang you !
Face. Or Madame Cæsarean.
Dol. Out upon you, rogue !
Would I had but time to beat thee!
Let's know where you set up next; I will send you
A customer now and then, for old acquaintance :
What new course have you?
Sub. Rogue, l'll hang myself,
That I may walk a greater devil than thou,
And haunt thee in the flock-bed and the buttery,
SCENE III. - AN OUTER ROOM IN THE SAME
Enter Lovewit in the Spanish dress, with the Parson.
[Loud knocking at the door.] Love. What do you mean, my masters ?
Mam. [Without.] Open your door,
Cheaters, thieves, conjurors.
Offi. [Without] Or we will break it open.
Love. What warrant have you?
Offi. [Without.] Warrant enough, sir, doubt not,
If you 'll not open it.
Love. Is there an officer, there?
Offi. [1Vithout] Yes, two or three for failing.
Love. Have but patience,
And I will open it straight.
Enter Face as butler.
Face. Sir, have you done?
Is it a marriage? perfect?
Love. Yes, my
Face. Off with your ruff and cloak then; be yourself, sir.
Sur. [Without] Down with the door.
Kas. [Without.] 'Slight, ding it open.
Love. [ Opening the door.] Hold,
Hold, gentlemen, what means this violence ?
MAMMON, SURLY, KASTRIL, ANANIAS, TRIBULATION, and Officers
Mam. Where is this collier?
Sur. And my Captain Face?
Mam. These day owls
Sur. That are birding in men's purses.
Mam. Madam Suppository.
Kas. Doxy, my suster.
Of the foul pit.
Tri. Profane as Bel and the Dragon.
Ana. Worse than the grasshoppers or the lice of Egypt.
Love. Good gentlemen, hear me. Are you officers,
And can not stay this violence?
First Offi. Keep the peace.
Love. Gentlemen, what is the matter? Whom do you seek?
Mam. The chemical cozener.
Sur. And the captain pander.
Kas. The nun, my suster.
Mam. Madam Rabbi.
Love. Fewer at once, I pray you.
Second Ofi. One after another, gentlemen, I charge you, By virtue of my staff.
Ana. They are the vessels Of pride, lust, and the cart.
Love. Good zeal, lie still A little while.
Tri. Peace, Deacon Ananias.
Love. The house is mine here, and the doors are open. If there be any such persons as you seek for,
Use your authority, search on, o' God's name.
I am but newly come to town, and finding
This tumult 'bout my door, to tell you true,
It somewhat 'mazed me; till my man here, fearing
My more displeasure, told me he had done
Somewhat an insolent part, let out my house
(Belike, presuming on my known aversion
From any air o' the town while there was sickness)
To a doctor and a captain : who, what are they,
Or where they be, he knows not.
Mam. Are they gone?
Love. You may go in and search, sir. [MAMMON, ANA. and
TRIB. go in. Here, I find
The empty walls worse than I left them, smoked,
A few cracked pots and glasses, and a furnace :
The ceiling filled with poesies of the candle.
Only one gentlewoman, I met here,
That is within, that said she was a widow
Kas. Ay, that's my suster; I'll go thump her. Where is she?
[Goes in. Love. And should have married a Spanish count, but he, When he came to 't, neglected her so grossly, That I, a widower, am gone through with her.
Sur. How! have I lost her then?
Love. Were you the don, sir?
Good faith, now, she does blame you extremely, and says
You swore, and told her you had taken the pains
To dye your beard, and umbre o'er your face,
Borrowed a suit, and ruff, all for her love;
And then did nothing. What an oversight,
And want of putting forward, sir, was this !
Well fare an old harquebuzier, yet,
Could prime his powder, and give fire, and hit,
All in a twinkling!
Mam. The whole nest are fled !
Love. What sort of birds were they?
Mam. A kind of choughs,
Or thievish daws, sir, that have pick'd my purse
Of eight score and ten pounds within these five weeks,
Beside my first materials; and my goods,
That lie in the cellar, which I am glad they have left,
have home yet.
Love, Think you so, sir?
Love. By order of law, sir, but not otherwise.
Mam. Not mine own stuff !
Love. Sir, I can take no knowledge
That they are yours, but by public means.
If you can bring certificate that you were gulld of them,
Or any formal writ out of a court,
did cozen yourself, I will not hold them. Mam. I'll rather lose them.
Love. That you shall not, sir,
By me, in troth: upon these terms, they are yours.
What! should they have been, sir, turn'd into gold, all?
I can not tell — It may be they should What then?
Love. What a great loss in hope have you sustain'd !
Mam. Not I, the commonwealth has.
Face. Ay, he would have built
The city new; and made a ditch about it
Of silver, should have run with cream from Hogsden;
That, every Sunday, in Moorfields, the younkers,
And tits and tom-boys should have fed on, gratis.
Mam. I will go mount a turnip-cart, and preach
The end of the world, within these two months. Surly,
What! in a dream?
Sur. Must I needs cheat myself
With that same foolish vice of honesty !
Come, let us go and hearken out the rogues :
That Face I'll mark for mine, if e'er I meet him.
Face. If I can hear of him, sir, I'll bring you word,
Unto your lodging; for in troth, they were strangers
To me, I thought them honest as myself, sir.
[Exeunt Mam. and SUR. Re-enter ANANIAS and TRIBULATION. Tri. 'Tis well, the saints shall not lose all yet. Go, And get some carts
Love. For what, my zealous friends?
Ana. To bear away the portion of the righteous Out of this den of thieves.
Love. What is that portion?
Ana. The goods sometimes the orphan's, that the brethren Bought with their silver pence.
Love. What, those in the cellar, The knight, Sir Mammon, claims?
Ana. I do defy
The wicked Mammon, so do all the brethren,
Thou profane man! I ask thee with what conscience
Thou canst advance that idol against us,
That have the seal? were not the shillings number'd,
That made the pounds; were not the pounds told out,
Upon the second day of the fourth week,
In the eighth month, upon the table dormant,
The year of the last patience of the saints,
Six hundred and ten?
Love. Mine earnest vehement botcher,
And deacon also, I can not dispute with you:
But if you get you not away the sooner,
I shall confute you with a cudgel,
Tri. Be patient, Ananias.
Ana. I am strong,
And will stand up, well girt, against an host
That threaten Gad in exile.
Love. I shall send you
To Amsterdam, to your cellar.
Ana. I will pray there,
Against thy house : may dogs defile thy walls,
And wasps and hornets breed beneath thy roof,
This seat of falsehood, and this cave of cozenage !
[Exeunt ANA. and TRIB.
Love. Another too?
Drug. Not I, sir, I am no brother.
Love. [Beats him.] Away, you Harry Nicholas ! do you talk?
[Exit Druc. Face. No, this was Abel Drugger. Good sir, go,
[To the PARSON. And satisfy him; tell him all is done : He staid too long a-washing of his face. The doctor, he shall hear of him at West-chester; And of the captain, tell him, at Yarmouth, or Some good port-town else, lying for a wind. [Exit PARSON. If you can get off the angry child, now, sir
Enter KASTRIL dragging in his sister. Kas. Come on, you ewe, you have match'd most sweetly, have
'Slight, you are a mammet! O, I could touse you, now. Death, mun' you marry, with a plague !