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Sir S. What, have you found your senses at last then? In good time, sir.

Val. You were abused, sir; I never was distracted. For. How? not mad, Mr, Scandal?

Scand. No, really, sir; I'm his witness, it was all counterfeit.

Val, I thought I had reasons

-but it was a poor

contrivance the effect has shown it such.

Sir S. Contrivance! what, to cheat me? to cheat your father! Sirrah, could you hope to prosper?

Val. Indeed, I thought, sir, when the father endea voured to undo the son, it was a reasonable return of

nature.

Sir S. Very good, sir, Mr. Buckram, are you ready? Come, sir, will you sign and seal?

Val. If you please, sir; but first I would ask this lady one question.

Sir S. Sir, you must ask me leave first That lady! No, sir; you shall ask that lady no questions, till you have asked her blessing, sir; that lady is to be my wife,

Val. I have heard as much, sir; but I would have it from her own mouth.

Sir S. That's as much as to say, I lie, sir; and you don't believe what I say,

Val. Pardon me, sir. But I reflect, that I very lately counterfeited madness: I don't know but the frolic may go round.

Sir S. Come, chuck, satisfy him, answer him.Come, Mr. Buckram, the pen and ink.

Buck. Here it is, sir, with the deed; all is ready. [VALENTINE goes to ANGELICA. Ang. "Tis true, you have a great while pretended love to me; nay, what if you were sincere? Still you must pardon me, if I think my own inclinations have a better right to dispose of my person, than yours. Sir S. Are you answered now, sir?

Val. Yes, sir.

Sir S. Where's your plot, sir? and your contri

vance now, sir? Will you sign, sir? Come, will you sign and seal, sir?

Val. With all my heart, sir.

Scand. 'Sdeath, you are not mad, indeed? to ruin yourself?

Val. I have been disappointed of my only hope; and he, that loses hope, may part with any thing. I never valued fortune, but as it was subservient to my pleasure; and my only pleasure was to please this lady: I have made many vain attempts; and find at last that nothing but my ruin can effect it; which, for that reason, I will sign to.- -Give me the Ang. Generous Valentine! Buck. Here is the deed, sir.

paper.

[Aside.

Val. But where is the bond, by which I am obliged to sign this?

Buck. Sir Sampson, you have it.

Ang. No, I have it; and I'll use it, as I would every thing that is an enemy to Valentine.

Sir S. How now?

Val. Ha!

[Tears the Paper.

Ang. Had I the world to give you, it could not make me worthy of so generous and faithful a passion. Here's my hand; my heart was always yours, and struggled very hard to make this utmost trial of your virtue. [To VALENTINE. Val. Between pleasure and amazement, I am lost→ but on my knees I take the blessing.

Sir S. Oons, what is the meaning of this?

Ben. Mess, here's the wind changed again. Father, you and I may make a voyage together now!

Ang. Well, Sir Sampson, since I have played you a trick, I'll advise you how you may avoid such another. Learn to be a good father, or you'll never get a second wife. I always loved your son, and hated your unforgiving nature; and it is hardly more pleasure to me, that I can make him and myself happy, than that I can punish you.

Sir S. Gons, you're à crocodile.

For. Really, Sir Sampson, this is a sudden eclipse. Sir S. You're an illiterate old fool; and I'm another. The stars are liars; and if I had breath, I'd curse them and you, myself, and all the world. Tatt. Sir, sir, if you are in all this disorder for want of a wife, I can spare you mine.

Sir S. Confound you and your wife together.

[Exeunt SIR SAMPSON and FORESIGHT. Tatt. Oh, are you there, sir? I am indebted to you for my happiness. [TO JEREMY.

Jer. Sir, I ask you ten thousand pardons: it was an arrant mistake. You see, sir, my master was never mad, nor any thing like it.-Then how can it be otherwise?

Kal. Tattle, I thank you; you would have interposed between me and heaven; but Providence laid purgatory in your way. You have but justice.

Scand. [To ANGELICA.] Well, madam, you have done exemplary justice, in punishing an inhuman father, and rewarding a faithful lover: but there is a third good work, which I, in particular, must thank you for: I was an infidel to your sex, and you have converted me- -for now I am convinced that all women are not, like fortune, blind in bestowing favours, either on those who do not merit, or who do not want them.

Ang. It is an unreasonable accusation that you lay upon our sex. You tax us with injustice, only to cover your own want of merit. You would all have the reward of love; but few have the constancy to stay till it becomes your due. How few, like Valentine, would persevere even to martyrdom, and sacrifice their interest to their constancy? In admiring me, you misplace the novelty.

The miracle to-day is, that we find

A lover true; not that a woman's kind. [Exeunt.

THE END

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