me now, in the old jog-trot way, again. expensive plan for a trader, truly. What, What a fool was I, to leave London for would you have a man of business come foreign parts!―That ever I should leave Thread-abroad, scamper extravagantly here and there needle-street, to thread an American forest, and every where, then return home, and have where a man's as soon lost as a needle in a nothing to tell, but that he has been here and bottle of hay! there and every where? 'sdeath, sir, would Med. Patience, Trudge! patience! If we you have me travel like a lord? Travelling, once recover the shipuncle, was always intended for improvement; Trudge. Lord, sir, I shall never recover and improvement is an advantage; and ade what I have lost in coming abroad. When vantage is profit, and profit is gain. Which, my master and I were in London, I had such in the travelling translation of a trader, means, a mortal snug birth of it! why, I was factotum. that you should gain every advantage of imMed. Factotum to a young merchant is no proving your profit. I have been comparing such sinecure, neither. the land, here, with that of our own country. Trudge. But then the honour of it. Think Med. And you find it like a good deal of of that, sir; to be clerk as well as own man. the land of our own country-cursedly enOnly consider. You find very few city clerks cumbered with black legs 1), I take it. made out of a man 1), now-a-days. To be Inkle. And calculating how much it might king of the counting-house, as well as lord be made to produce by the acre. of the bed-chamber. Ah! if I had him but now in the little dressing room behind the office; tying his hair, with a bit of red tape, as usual. Med. Yes, or writing an invoice with lampblack, and shining his shoes with an ink-bottle, as usual, you blundering blockhead! Trudge. Oh! if I was but brushing the accounts, or casting up the coats! mercy on us! what's that? Med. That! what? Trudge. Did'nt you hear a noise? Med. Y-es-but-hush! Oh, heavens be praised! here he is at last. "Med. You were? Inkle. Yes; I was proceeding algebraically upon the subject. Med. Indeed! Inkle. And just about extracting the square root. Med. Hum! Inkle. I was thinking too, if so many natives could be caught, how much they might fetch at the West Indian markets. Med. Now let me ask you a question, or two, young cannibal catcher, if you please. Inkle. Well. Med. Aren't we bound for Barbadoes; partly to trade, but chiefly to carry home the daughter of the governor, Sir Christopher Curry, who has till now been under your father's care, in Threadneedle-street, for polite English education? Inkle. Granted. Med. Zounds, one would think, by your confounded composure, that you were walking in St. James's Park, instead of an American Med. And isn't it determined, between the Forest; and that all the beasts were nothing old folks, that you are to marry Narcissa as but good company. The hollow trees, here, soon as we get there? centry boxes, and the lions in 'em soldiers; the jackalls, courtiers; the crocodiles, fine women; and the baboons, beaus. What the plague made you loiter so long? Inkle. Reflection. Inkle. A fixed thing. Med. Then what the devil do you do here, hunting old hairy negroes, when you ought to be ogling a fine girl in the ship? Algebra, too! you'll have other things to think of when Med. So I should think; reflection generally you are married, I promise you. A plodding comes lagging behind. What, scheming, 1 fellow's head, in the hands of a young wife, suppose; never quiet. At it again, eh: what like a boy's slate after school, soon gets alí a happy trader is your father, to have so pru- its arithmetic wiped off: and then it appears dent a son for a partner! why, you are the in its true simple state; dark, empty, and carefullest Co. in the whole city. Never losing bound in wood, Master Inkle. sight of the main chance; and that's the rea- Inkle. Not in a match of this kind. Why, son, perhaps, you lost sight of us, here, on it's a table of interest from beginning to end, the main of America. old Medium. Inkle. Right, Mr. Medium. Arithmetic, I Med. Well, well, this is no time to talk. own, has been the means of our parting at Who knows but, instead of sailing to a wedpresent. ding, we may get cut up, here, for a wedding Trudge. Ha! a sum in division, I reckon. dinner: tossed up for a dingy duke perhaps, [Aside. or stewed down for a black baronet, or eat Med. And pray, if I may be so bold, what raw by an inky commoner? mighty scheme has just tempted you to em- Inkle. Why, sure, you aren't afraid? ploy your head, when you ought to make Med. Who, I afraid! ha! ha! ha! no, not use of your heels? I! what the deuce should I be afraid of? thank Inkle. My heels! here's pretty doctrine! do heaven, I have a clear conscience, and need you think I travel merely for motion? a fine not be afraid of any thing. A scoundrel might 1) Double entendre. The second meaning, generally given not be quite so easy on such an occasion; by the actor with an arch look at the upper-boxes, but it's the part of an honest man not to bethe place of resort of the London clerks at the The-have like a scoundrel: I never behaved like a atres, is, that there are very few clerks really men now-a-days, they being rather dandyish and effeminate in their dress. 1) Black legs, (slang) for Gamesters; and the blacks, or negroes, have, of course, black legs. scoundrel-for which reason I am an honest And the Eagle, I warrant you, Inkle. Slow and sure, my good, virtuous, Mr. Medium! our companions can be but half a mile before us: and, if we do but double their steps, we shall overtake 'em at one mile's end, by all the powers of arithmetic. Med. Oh, curse your arithmetic! how are we to find our way? goose. looks like a But we merchant lads, tho' the foe we can't maul, Nor are paid, like fine king-ships, to fight at a call, Why we pay ourselves well, without fighting at all. 1st Sail. Avast! look a-head there. Here Inkle. That, uncle, must be left to the doc-they come, chased by a fleet of black devils, trine of chances. [Exeunt. Midsh. And the devil a fire have I to give 'em. We han't a grain of powder left. What must we do, lad? SCENE II.-Another part of the Forest. A ship at anchor in the bay, at a small 2nd Sail. Do? sheer off, to be sure. distance. All. Come, bear a hand, Master Marlin- Mate. Come, come, bear a hand 1), my must [Going to the other side and halloing lads. Tho'f the bay is just under our bow-to Inkle, etc.] Yoho, lubbers! crowd all the sprits, it will take a damned deal of tripping sail you can, d'ye mind me! to come at it-there's hardly any steering clear [Exit. of the rocks here. But do we muster all Enter MEDIUM, running, as pursued by hands? all right, think ye? the Blacks. 1st Sail. All to a man besides yourself, Med. Nephew! Trudge! run — - scamper! and a monkey-the three land lubbers 2), that scour-fly! zounds, what harm did I ever do, edged away in the morning, goes for nothing, to be hunted to death by a pack of bloodyou know they're all dead may-hap, by this. hounds? why, nephew! Oh, confound your Mate. Dead! you be-why, they're friends long sums in arithmetic! I'll take care of my of the captain; and, if not brought safe aboard self; and if we must have any arithmetic, dot to-night, you may all chance to have a salt and carry one for my money. [Runs off. eel for your supper-that's all. Moreover, the young plodding spark, he with the grave, foul-weather face, there, is to man the tight little frigate, Miss Narcissa, what d'ye call her, that is bound with us for Barbadoes. Rot 'em for not keeping under way, I say! but come, let's see if a song will bring 'em to. Let's have a full chorus to the good merchant ship, the Achilles, that's wrote by our Captain. The Achilles, though christen'd, good ship, 'tis surmis'd, From that old man of war, great Achilles, so Was he, like our vessel, pray, fairly baptiz'd? Poets sung that Achilles-if, now, they've an itch Enter INKLE and TRUDGE, hastily. Trudge. Oh! that ever I was born, to leave pen, ink, and powder, for this! Inkle. Trudge, how far are the sailors before us? Trudge. I'll run and see, sir, directly. Inkle. Blockhead, come here. The savages are close upon us; we shall scarce be able to trees with me; they'll pass us, and we may recover our party. Get behind this tuft of then recover our ship with safety. Trudge. [Going behind] Oh! Threadneedlestreet, Thread! Inkle Peace. Trudge. [Hiding] needle-street. [They hide behind trees. Natives cross. After a long pause, Inkle looks from the trees. Inkle. Trudge, Trudge. Sir. [In a whisper. Inkie. Are they all gone by? Trudge. Won't you look and see? Inkle. [Looking round] So, all's safe at last. [Coming forward] Nothing like policy in these cases; but you'd have run on, like a booby! A tree, I faucy, you'll find, in future, the best resource in a hot pursuit. Trudge. Oh, charming! It's a retreat for a king), sir. Mr. Medium, however, has not got up in it; your uncle, sir, has run on like this time, I take it; who are now most likely a booby; and has got up with our party by at the shore. But what are we to do next, sir? Inkle. Reconnoitre a little, and then proceed. Trudge. Then pray, sir, proceed to reconnoitre; for, the sooner the better. Inkle. Then look out, d'ye hear, and tell me if you discover any danger. Trudge. Y-ye-s-yes; but-[Trembling." 1) Charles 2d. hid himself in a tree. Inkle. Well, is the coast clear? This cavern may prove a safe retreat to us Trudge. Eh! Oh lord!-Clear? [Rubbing for the present. I'll enter, cost what it will. his eyes] Oh dear! oh dear! the coast will Trudge. Oh Lord! no, don't, don't - We soon be clear enough now, I promise you-shall pay too dear for our lodging, depend on't. The ship is under sail, sir! Inkle. This is no time for debating. You Inkle. Confusion! my property carried off are at the mouth of it: lead the way, Trudge. in the vessel. Trudge. All, all, sir, except me. Trudge. What! go in before your honour! I know my place better, I assure you-I might Inkle. They may report me dead, perhaps; walk into more mouths than one, perhaps. and dispose of my property at the next island. [Aside. [Vessel under sail. Inkle. Coward! then follow me. [Noise again. Trudge. Ah! there they go. [A gun fired] Trudge. I must, sir; I must! Ah Trudge, That will be the last report 1) we shall ever Trudge! what a damned hole are you getting hear from 'em, I'm afraid. That's as much into! [Exeunt. as to say, good by to ye. And here we are SCENE III.—A cave, decorated with skins left-two fine, full-grown babes in the wood! Inkle. What an ill-timed accident! just too, of wild beasts, feathers, etc. a rude kind of curtain, as door to an inner part. when my speedy union with Narcissa, at Barbadoes, would so much advance my interests. Enter INKLE and TRUDGE, from mouth of Something must be hit upon, and speedily; but what resource? the cavern. [Thinking. Trudge. Why, sir! you must be mad to Trudge. The old one-a tree, sir-'tis all go any farther. we have for it now. What would I give, Inkle. So far, at least, we have proceeded now, to be perched upon a high stool, with with safety. Ha! no bad specimen of savage our brown desk squeezed into the pit of my elegance. These ornaments would be worth stomach-scribbling away an old parchment! something in England.-We have little to fear But all my red ink will be spilt by an old here, I hope: this cave rather bears the pleasing black pin of a negro. face of a profitable adventure. A voyage over seas had not enter'd my head, bread. But the only sign here, is of nothing to eat. Oho! I shall die a lost mutton! Heigho! that I-for hunger should die! For my bacon, I fancy, I never shall save. Trudge. Very likely, sir; but, for a pleasing face, it has the cursed'st ugly mouth I ever saw in my life. Now do, sir, make off as fast as you can. If we once get clear of the natives' houses, we have little to fear from the lions and leopards; for, by the appearance of their parlours, they seem to have killed all the wild beasts in the country. Now pray, do, my good master, take my advice, and run away; Inkle. Rascal! Talk again of going out, and I'll flea you alive. Trudge. That's just what I expect for coming their skin stript over their cars; and ours will in. All that enter here appear to have had be kept for curiosities-We shall stand here, stuffed, for a couple of white wonders. Inkle. This curtain seems to lead to another apartment: I'll draw it. Trudge. No, no, no, don't; don't. We may be called to account for disturbing the company: you may get a curtain lecture, perhaps, sir. Inkle. Peace, booby, and stand on your guard. Trudge. Oh! what will become of us! some grim. seven-foot fellow ready to scalp us. Inkle. By heaven! a woman! [Yarico and Wowski, discovered asleep. Trudge. A woman! [Aside-loud] But let him come on; I'm ready-dam'me, I don't fear facing the devil himself-Faith, it is a woman— fast asleep, too. Inkle. And beautiful as an angel! Inkle. Scoundrel! is this a time to jest? Trudge. No, faith, sir! hunger is too sharp to be jested with. As for me, I shall starve for want of food. Now you may meet a Trudge. And, egad! there seems to be a luckier fate: you are able to extract the square nice, little, plump, bit in the corner; only root, sir; and that's the very best provision she's an angel of rather darker sort. you can find here to live upon. But I! [Noise at a distance] Mercy on us! here they come again. Inkle. Hush! keep back-she wakes. Inkle. Confusion! deserted on one side, and pressed on the other, which way shall I turn?-Yarico. 1) Report of a gun: and report, an account of any thing that has happened. [Yarico comes forward - Inkle and When the chace of day is done, Which, for us, our warriors win, Decks our cells, at set of sun; Again, in sullen haste, he flies, Inkle. Our language! Yarico. Hark! I heard a noise! Wowski, awake! whence can it proceed? [She wakes Wowski, and they both come forward Yarico towards Inkle; Wowski towards Trudge. Yar. Ah! what form is this?-are you a man? Inkle. True flesh and blood, my charming heathen, I promise you. Yar. What harmony in his voice! what a shape! How fair his skin too!- [Gazing. Trudge. This must be a lady of quality, by her staring. Far. Say, stranger, whence come you? Inkle. From a far distant island; driven on this coast by distress, and deserted by my companions. Yar. And do you know the danger that surrounds you here? our woods are filled with beasts of prey-my countrymen, too(yet, I think they couldn't find the heart)might kill you. It would be a pity if you fell in their way — I think I should weep if you came to any harm. Trudge. O ho! it's time, I see, to begin making interest with the chambermaid. [Takes Wowski apart. Inkle. How wild and beautiful! sure, there's magic in her shape, and she has rivetted me to the place. But where shall I look for safety? let me fly, and avoid my death. decked in silks, my brave maid, and have a Yar. Nay, do not laugh at me—but is it so? Yar. Oh, wonder! I wish my countrywomen could see me-But won't your warriors kill us? Inkle. No, our only danger, on land, is here. Yar. Then let us retire further into the cave. Come-your safety is in my keeping. Inkle. I follow you-Yet, can you run some risque in following me? DUET T. Inkle. O say, simple maid, have you form'd any notion Of all the rude dangers in crossing the ocean? When winds whistle shrilly, ab! won't they remind you, To sigh, with regret, for the grot left behind you? Yar. Ah! no, I could follow, and sail the world over, Nor think of my grot, when I look at my lover! The winds which blow round us, your arms for my pillow, Will lull us to sleep, whilst we're rock'd by each billow. Both. O say then, my true love, we never will sunder, Nor shrink from the tempest, nor dread the big thunder: While constant, we'll laugh at all changes of weather, And journey, all over the world, both together. Trudge. Why, you speak English as well as I, my little Wowski. Wows. Iss. Trudge. Iss! and you learnt it from a strange man, that tumbled from a big boat, many moons ago, you say! Wows. Iss-teach me-teach good many. Trudge. Then, what the devil made 'em so surpris'd at seeing us! was he like me? [Wows. Yar. Oh! no-But-[as if puzzled] well shakes her head] Not so smart a body, maythen, die stranger, but, don't depart. But I hap. Was his face, now, round, and comely, will try to preserve you; and if you are kill-and-eh! [Stroking his chin] Was it like ed, Yarico must die too! Yet, 'tis I alone can mine? save you your death is certain without my Wows. Like dead leaf-brown and shrivel. assistance; and indeed, indeed, you shall not Trudge. Oh, oh, an old shipwrecked sailor, want it. I warrant. With white and grey hair, eh, my pretty beauty spot? Inkle. My kind Yarico! what means, then, must be used for my safety? Wows. Iss; all white. When night come, Yar. My cave must conceal you: none enter he put it in pocket. believe." Wows. Iss. it, since my father was slain in battle. I will Trudge. Oh! wore a wig. But the old boy bring you food, by day, then lead you to our taught you something more than English, 1 unfrequented groves, by moonlight, to listen to the nightingale. If you should sleep, I'll watch you, and wake you when there's danger. Inkle. Generous maid! then, to you I will owe my life; and whilst it lasts, nothing shall part us. Yar. And shan't it, shan't it indeed? Inkle. No, my Yarico! for, when an opportunity offers to return to my country, you shall be my companion. Yar. What! cross the seas! Inkle. Yes. Help me to discover a vessel, and you shall enjoy wonders. You shall be Trudge. The devil he did! What was it? Wows. Teach me put dry grass, red hot, in hollow white stick. Trudge. Aye, what was that for? Trudge. And what became of him at last? What did your countrymen do for the poor fellow? Wows. Eat him one day-Our chief kill him. Trudge. Mercy on us! what damned sto- a little after their spouses. Well, as my master machs, to swallow a tough old tar! though, seems king of this palace, und has taken his for the matter of that, there's many of our Indian queen already, I'll e'en be usher of the captains would eat all they kill, I believe! Ah, black rod here. But you have had a lover or poor Trudge! your killing comes next. two in your time; eh, Wowski? Wows. Oh iss-great many-I tell you. Wows. No, no-not you-no [Anxiously. [Running to him. Trudge. No? why what shall I do, if I get in their paws? Wows. I fight for you! Trudge. Will you? ecod she's a brave, good-natured, wench! she'll be worth a hundred of your English wives-Whenever they fight on their husband's account, it's with him instead of for him, I fancy. But how the plague am I to live here? Wows. I feed you-bring you kid. While man, never go away- Cold moons are now coming in: And when all the sky is blue, I'll catch you a cockatoo, When cold comes, or when 'tis hot Ah don't go grieve me! White man, don't leave me! Trudge. Who? Wows. You. Trudge. Yes, pretty little Wowski! Wows. Iss, you're like the snow! Trudge. Never, not for any white one: Wows. Wars, jars, scars, can't expose ye, Trudge. So snug and cosey! Trudge. Coying, toying, Both. With a rosy posey, When I'm dosey, Bear-skin night-caps, too, shall warm my head. Bear-skin night-caps, etc. etc. ACT II. Trudge. Zounds! leopard's skin for winter wear, and feathers for a summer's suit! Ila, ha! I shall look like a walking hammer-cloth, at Christmas, and an upright shuttlecock, in the dog-days. And for all this, if my master and I find our way to England, you shall be SCENE I-The Quay at Barbadoes. part of our travelling equipage; and, when I Enter several PLANTERS. get there, I'll give you a couple of snug rooms, 1st Plant. I saw her this morning, gentleon a first floor, and visit you every evening men, you may depend on't. as soon as I come from the counting house. never fails me. My telescope I pop'd upon her as I was Do you like it? taking a peep from my balcony. A brave tight ship, I tell you, bearing down directly for Barbadoes here. Wows. Iss. Trudge. Damme, what a flashy fellow shall seem in the city! I'll get her a white boy 1) to bring up the tea-kettle. Then I'll teach you to write and dress hair. 2d Plant. Ods my life! rare news! We have not had a vessel arrive in our harbour these six weeks. Wows. You great man in your country? 3d Plant. And the last brought only madam Trudge. Oh yes, a very great man. I'm Narcissa, our Governor's daughter, from Enghead clerk of the counting-house, and first land; with a parcel of lazy, idle, white folks valet-de-chambre of the dressing-room. Ipounce about her. Such cargoes will never do for parchments, powder hair, black shoes, ink pa-our trade, neighbour. per, shave beards, and mend pens. But, hold; 4th Plant. No, no: we want slaves. A terI had forgot one material point-you arn't rible dearth of 'em in Barbadoes, lately! but married, I hope? your dingy passengers for my money. Give Wows. No: you be my chum-chum! me a vessel like a collier, where all the lading Trudge. So I will. It's best, however, to tumbles out as black as my hat. But are you be sure of her being single; for Indian hus- sure, now, you aren't mistaken? bands are not quite so complaisant as English ones, and the vulgar dogs might thing of looking 1st Plant. Mistaken! 'sbud, do you doubt [To 1st Planter. 1) In the time when people easily made great fortunes, my glass? I can discover a gull by it six leain a short time, in the Indies, it was customary for gues off: I could see every thing as plain as these persons to bring over with them a black boy to if I was on board. wait at table, and act as lady's footman, (probably from the idea that they would make better servants, as not having the same ideas of liberty as an English servant) so that Trudge's idea of having a white boy: for black Wowski makes a laughable contrast, not only of the lady with that of the boy; but also the or custom that was, with that he pretended to introduce. 2d Plant. Indeed! and what were her coours? 1st Plant. Um! why English-or DutchFrench-I don't exactly remember. 3d Plant. What were the sailors aboard? |
