THE GUARDIAN: A COMEDY, IN TWO ACTS. BY DAVID GARRICK, Esq. REMARKS. Mr. Garrick, perhaps the best judge of the drama that this or any other nation ever produced, has, in the following ittle piece, presented the theatrical world with a translation of M. Fagan's "Pupille," which was esteemed a very complete little comedy. He has, however, not confined himself to a mere translation, but has, with great judgment, made "such alterations from the original as the difference of the language and manners required." The success with which this piece was attended, so far exceeded the hopes of the author, that he availed himself of "an opportunity to return thanks to the public for their kind indulgence, and to the performers, for their great care." Mr. Heartly the guardian, originally performed by Mr. Garrick himself, and Miss Harriot, his ward, by Mise Pritchard, are two finely-drawn characters, which were well supported. SERVANT. me-Another sign of love.-And whenever I Young C. When I am with her, she's always Sir C. Tell Mr. Heartly, his friend and neigh-grave; and the moment I get up to leave her, bour, Sir Charles Clackit, would say three words then the poor thing begins-"Stay, you agreeto him. able runaway, stay, I shall soon overcome the fears your presence gives me."I could say more- -But a man of honour, uncle-—————— Sir C. What, and has she said all these things to you? Serv. I shall, Sir[Exit. Sir C. Now nephew, consider once again, before I open the matter to my neighbour Heartly, what I am going to undertake for you.-Why don't you speak? Young C. Is it proper and decent, uncle? Sir C. Pshaw; don't be a fool-but answer me-don't you flatter yourself What assurance have you that this young lady, my friend's ward, has a ilking to you? Young C. First then-Whenever I see her she never looks at me-That's a sign of love.Whenever I speak to her she never answers 16 Young C. O yes, and ten times more-with her eyes. Sir C. With her eyes! Eyes are very equivocal, Jack. However, if the young lady has any liking to you, Mr. Heartly is too much a man of the world, and too much my friend, to oppose the match; so do you walk into the gar den, and I will open the matter to him. Young C. Is there any objection to my staying, uncle The business will soon be ended. You Young C. You'll excuse me, Mr. Heartlywill propose the match, he will give his consent, My uncle does not set up for an orator-a little I shall give mine, miss is sent for, and l'affaire confused or so, Sir-You see what I am--But est fait. [Snapping his fingers. I ought to ask pardon for the young lady and Sir C. And so you think that a young beautiful myself.-We are young, Sir.-I must confess we heiress, with forty thousand pounds, is to be had were wrong to conceal it from you-but my uncle, with a scrap of French, and a snap of your fin-1 see is pleased to be angry, and therefore I shall ger?-Pr'ythee, get away, and don't provoke me. say no more at present. Young C. Well, well, I am gone, uncle.When you come to the point, I shall be ready to make my appearance.-Bon voyage! [Exit. Sir C. The devil's in these young fellows, 1I think. We send 'em abroad to cure their sheepishness, and they get above proof the other way. Enter HEARTLY, Good morrow to you, neighbour. Heart. And to you, Sir Charles; I am glad to see you so strong and healthy. Sir C. I can return you the compliment, my friend-Without flattery, you don't look more than thirty-five; and between ourselves, you are on the wrong side of forty-But, mum for that. Heart. Ease and tranquillity keep me as you see. Sir C. Why don't you marry, neighbour? A good wife would do well for you. Heart. For me? you are pleased to be merry, Sir Charles. Sir C. No, faith, I am serious, and had I a daughter to recommend to you, you should say me nay, more than once, I assure you, neighbour Heartly, before I would quit you. Heart. I am much obliged to you. Sir C. And now to my business.-You have no objection, I suppose, to tie up your ward, Miss Harriot, though you have slipped the collar yourself.-Ha, ha, ha! Heart. Quite the contrary, Sir; I have taken her some time from the boarding school, and brought her home, in order to dispose of her worthily with her own inclination. Sir C. If you don't leave the room this moment, and stay in the garden till I call you Young C. I am sorry I have displeased youdid not think it was mal-a-propos; but you must have your way, uncle-You command-I submit-Mr. Heartly, yours. [Exit. Sir C. Puppy! [Aside.] My nephew's a little unthinking, Mr. Heartly, as your see, and therefore I have been a little cautious how I have proceeded in this affair: but indeed he has persuaded me, in a manner, that your ward and he are not ill together. Heart. Indeed! This is the first notice I have had of it, and I cannot conceive why Miss Harriot should conceal it from me; for I have often assured her that I would never oppose her inclination, though I might endeavour to direct it. Sir C. You are right, neighbour.-But here she is. Enter HARRIOT and LUCY. Har. He is with company-I'll speak to him another time. [Retires. Lucy. Young, handsome, and afraid of being seen. You are very particular, Miss. [Apart to HARRIOT. Heart. Miss Harriot, you must not go.-[HARRIOT returns.] Sir Charles, give me leave to introduce you to this young lady.-[Introduces her.] You know, I suppose, the reason of this gentleman's visit to me? Har. Sir! Heart. Don't be disturb'd, I shall not reproach you with any thing but keeping your wishes a Sir C. Her father, I have heard you say, re-secret from me so long. commended that particular care to you, when she had reached a certain age. Heart. He did so—And I am the more desirous to obey him scrupulously in this circumstance, as she will be a most valuable acquisition to the person who shall gain her-for, not to mention her fortune which is the least consideration, her sentiments are worthy her birth; she is gentle, modest, and obliging.-In a word, my friend, I never saw youth more amiable or discreet-but perhaps I am a little partial to her. Sir C. No, no, she is a delicious creature, every body says so. But I believe, neighbour, something has happened that you little think of. Heart. What, pray, Sir Charles? Re-enter YOUNG CLACKIT. Young C. Here I am at your service, Sir.— My uncle is a little unhappy in his manner; but I'll clear the matter in a moment-Miss Harriot, Sir-your ward Sir C. Get away, you puppy! Young C. Miss Harriot, sir, your ward, a most accomplished young lady, to be sure Sir C. Thou art a most accomplished coxcomb, to be sure. Heart. Pray, Sir Charles, let the young gentleman speak. Har. Upon my word, Sir- -Lucy! [Confused. Lucy. Well, and Lucy! I'll lay my life 'tis a treaty of marriage.—Is that such a dreadful thing? Oh, for shame, Madam! Young ladies of fashion are not frightened at such things now-a-days. Heart. [To SIR CHARLES.] We have gone too far, Sir Charles.We must excuse her delicacy, and give her time to recover:-I had better talk with her alone; we will leave her now.-Be persuaded that no endeavours shall be wanting on my part to bring this affair to a happy and speedy conclusion. Sir C. I shall be obliged to you, Mr. Heartly.— Young lady, your servant.-What grace and modesty! She is a most engaging creature, and I shall be proud to make her one of my family. TO HEARTLY. Heart. You do us honour, Sir Charles. [Exeunt SIR CHARLES and HEARTLY. Lucy. Indeed, Miss Harriot, you are very particular. You was tired of the boarding school, and yet seem to have no inclination to be married.--What can be the meaning of all this? That smirking old gentleman is uncle to Mr. Clackit; and, my life for it, he has made some proposals to your guardian. Har. Pr'ythee, don't plague me about Mr. Clackit. Lucy. But why not, Miss? Though he is a VOL. 1....C 2* little fantastical, loves to hear himself talk, and | me in particular.-But that is not all I have is somewhat self-sufficient, you must consider he lately found you thoughtful, absent, and disturbed is young, has been abroad, and keeps good com- Be plain with me-has not somebody been pany. The trade will soon be at an end, if happy enough to please you? young ladies and gentlemen grow over-nice and exceptious. I Har. But if I can find one without these faults, may surely please myself. Lucy. Without these faults! and is he young, Miss! Har. He is sensible, modest, polite, affable, and generous; and charms from the natural impulses of his own heart, as much as others disgust by their senseless airs and insolent affectation. Lucy. Upon my word!-but why have you kept this a secret so long? Your guardian is kind to you beyond conception.-What difficulties can you have to overcome? Har. Why, the difficulty of declaring my sentiments. Lucy. Leave that to me, Miss.-But your spark, with all his accomplishments, must have very little penetration not to have discovered his good fortune in your eyes. Har. I take care that my eyes don't tell too much; and he has too much delicacy to interpret looks to his advantage. Besides he would certainly disapprove my passion; and if I should ever make the declaration, and meet with a denial, I should absolutely die with shame. Lucy. I'll insure your life for a silver thimble.But what can possibly hinder your coming together? Har. His excess of merit. Lucy. His excess of a fiddlestick!-But come, I'll put you in the way :-you shall trust me with the secret-I'll entrust it again to half a dozen friends; they shall entrust it to half a dozen more; by which means it will travel half the world over in a week's time: the gentleman will certainly hear of it, and then if he is not at your feet in the fetching of a sigh, I'll give up perquisites at your wedding. What is his name, Miss? all my Har. I cannot tell you his name—indeed I cannot I am afraid of being thought too singular. But why should I be ashamed of my passion? Is the impression which a virtuous character makes upon our hearts such a weakness that it may not be excused? Lucy. By my faith, Miss, I can't understand voù: you are afraid of being thought singular, and you really are so.-I would sooner renounce all the passions in the universe, than have one in my bosom beating and fluttering itself to pieces. Re-enter HEARTLY. Heart. Leave us, Lucy. Lucy. There's something going forward-'tis very hard I can't be of the party. [Aside, exit. Heart. She certainly thinks, from the character of the young man, that I shall disapprove of her choice. [Aside. Har. What can I possibly say to him? I am as much ashamed to make the declaration, as he [Aside. would be to understand it. Heart. Don't imagine that I would know more of your thoughts than you desire I should; but the tender care which I have ever shown, and the sincere friendship which I shall always have for you, give me a right to inquire into every thing that concerns you.-Some friends have spoken to Har. I cannot deny it, Sir-yes-somebody indeed has pleased me.-But I must entreat you not to give credit to any idle stories, or inquiré further into the particulars of my inclination; for I cannot possibly have resolution enough to say more to you. Heart. But have you made a choice my dear? Har. I have, in my own mind, Sir, and 'tis impossible to make a better;-reason, honour, every thing must approve it. ་ Heart. And how long have you conceived this passion? Har. Ever since I left the country to live with you. [Sighs. Heart. I see your confusion, and will relieve you from it immediately-I am informed of the wholeHar. Sir! Heart. Don't be uneasy, for I can with pleasure assure you that your passion is returned with equal tenderness. Har. If you are not deceived-I cannot be more happy. Heart. I think I am not deceived;-but after the declaration you have made, and the assurances which I have given you, why will you conceal it any longer? Have I not deserved a little more confidence from you? Har. You have indeed deserved it, and should certainly have it, were I not well assured that you would oppose my inclinations. Heart. I oppose 'em! Am I then so unkind to you, my dear Harriot ?-Can you in the least doubt of my affection for you!-I promise you that I have no will but yours. Har. Since you desire it then, I will endeavour to explain myself. Heart. I am all attention-speak. Har. And if I do, I feel I shall never be able to speak to you again. Heart. I see your delicacy is hurt: but let me -Tell entreat you once more to confide in me.me his name, and the next moment I will go to him, and assure him that my consent shall confirm both your happiness. Har. You will easily find him.-And when you have, pray tell him how improper it is for a young woman to speak first-persuade him to spare my blushes, and to release me from so terrible a situation. I shall leave him with you--and hope that this declaration will make it impossible for you to mistake me any longer [Going. Enter YOUNG CLACKIT.-HARRIOT remains on the Stage. Heart. Are we not alone? what can this mean? gether. Young C. By your leave, Mr. Heartly[Crosses him to go to HARRIOT.] Have I caught you at last, my divine Harriot ?--Well, Mr. Heartly, sans façon--But what's the matter?Things look a little gloomy here;-one mutters to himself and gives me no answer, and the other turns her head and winks at me.-How the devil Har. I wink at you, Sir!-Did I, Sir? Heart. Miss Harriot's will is a law to me; and for you, Sir-the friendship which I have ever professed for your uncle is too sincere not to exert some of it on this occasion. Har I shall die with confusion ! [Aside. Young C. I am alive again.-Dear Mr. Heartly, thou art a most adorable creature! What a happiness it is to have to do with a man of sense, who has no foolish prejudices, and can see when a young fellow has something tolerable about him! Heart. Sir, not to flatter you, I must declare that it is from. a knowledge of your friends and family, that I have hopes of seeing you and this young lady happy. I will go directly to your uncle, and assure him that every thing goes on to our wishes. [Going Har. Mr. Heartly-pray, Sir! Young C. And you are very sure now that Har. Then why don't you leave me? But let concealment, like a worm i’th' bud, Take warning, Miss, when you once begin to Re-enter HEARTLY and Sir CHARLES CLACKIT. Heart. Poor Harriot, I see your distress, and am sorry for it; but it must be got over, and the sooner the better.--Mr. Clackit, my dear, will be glad of an opportunity to entertain you for the little time that I shall be absent. Poor Miss Har-That is the age, neighbour Heartly, for happiriot! [Smiles; Exit. ness and pleasure. Young C. Allez, allez, monsieur!—I'll answer for that.-Well, Ma'am, I think every thing succeeds to our wishes.-Be sincere, my adorable-Don't you think yourself a very happy young lady? Har. I shall be most particularly obliged to you, Sir, if you would inform me what is the meaning of all this. Young C. Inform you, Miss ?The matter, I believe, is pretty clear our friends have understandings we have affections-and a marriage follows of course. Har. Marriage, Sir! Pray what relation or particular connection is there between you and me, Sir? Young C. I may be deceived, faith;-but upon my honour, I always supposed that there was a little smattering of inclination between us. Har. And have you spoke to my guardian upon this supposition, Sir? Young C. And are you angry at it? believe not. Har. Indeed, Sir, this behaviour of yours is most extraordinary. Young C. Upon my soul this is very droll.What! has not your guardian been here this moment, and expressed all imaginable pleasure at our intended union? Har. He is in an error, Sir:-and had I not been too much astonished at your behaviour, I had undeceived him long before now. Young C. [Hums a tune.] But pray, Miss, what can be your intention in raising all this confusion in the family, and opposing your own inclinations? Har. Opposing my own inclinations, Sir? Young C. Ay, opposing your own inclinations, Madam. Har. Be assured, Sir, I never in my life had the least thought about you. Heart. I am willing, you see, to lose no time, which may convince you, Sir Charles, how proud I am of this alliance in our families. Sir C. 'Gad, I will send for the fiddles, and take a dance myself, and a fig for the gout and rheumatism. -But hold, hold the lovers methinks are a little out of humour with each other. What is the matter, Jack? Not pouting sure before your time? Young C. A trifle, Sir-the lady will tell you. [Hums a tune. Heart. You seem to be troubled, Harriot! what can this mean? Har. You have been in an error, Sir, about me;--I did not undeceive you, because I could not imagine that the consequences could have been so serious and so sudden;-but I am now forced to tell you that you have misunderstood me that you have distressed me. Heart. How, my dear? Sir C. What do you say, Miss? Young C. Mademoiselle is pleased to be out of humour; but I cant blame her; for, upon my honour, I think a little coquetry becomes her. Sir C. Ay, ay, ay-oh, oh-Is that all? These little squalls seldom overset the lover's boat, but drive it the faster to port-ay, ay, ay Young C. Talk to her a little, Mr. Heartly. She is a fine lady, and has many virtues; but she does not know the world. Heart. For heaven's sake, Miss Harriot, explain this riddle to me. Har. I cannot, Sir.-I have discovered the weakness of my heart-I have discovered it to you, Sir; but your unkind interpretations and reproachful looks convince me that I have already said too much. [Exit; HEARTLY muses. Sir C. Well, but harkye, nephew-this is going a little too far-What have you done to her? Heart. I never saw her so agitated before. Young C. Upon my soul, gentlemen, I am as much surprised at it as you can be-The little brouillerie between us arose upon her persisting that there was no passion, no penchant between us. Sir C. I'll tell you what, Jack-There is a certain kind of impudence about you, that I don't approve of. Young C. But what can the lady object to? I have offered to marry her; is not that a proof sufficient that I like her? A young fellow must have some affection that will go such lengths to indulge it. Ha, ha! Sir C. Why really, friend Heartly, I don't see how a young man can well do more, or a lady desire more. -What say you neighbour? Heart. Upon my word, I am puzzled about it -my thoughts upon the matter are so various and so confused.—Every thing I see and hear is so contradictory- -is so- She certainly cannot like any body else! Young C. No, no, I'll answer for that. Heart. Or she may be fearful then that your passion for her is not sincere; or, like other young men of the times, you may grow careless upon marriage, and neglect her. Young C. Ha! 'Egad, you have hit it; nothing but a little natural, delicate sensibility [Hums a tune. Heart. If so, perhaps the violence of her reproaches may proceed from the lukewarmness of your professions. Young C. Je vous demande pardon-I have sworn to her a hundred and a hundred times, that she should be the happiest of her sex.-But there is nothing suprising in all this; it is the misery of an over-fond heart, to be always doubtful of its happiness. Heart. And if she marries thee, I fear that she'll be kept in a state of doubt as long as she lives. [Half aside. Re-enter LUCY. Lucy. Pray, gentlemen, which of you has affronted my mistress? She is in a most prodigious taking yonder, and vows to return into the country again. Young C. Poor thing! Heart. I must inquire further into this; her behaviour is too particular for me not to be disturbed at it. | defend from every inquietude the most delicate and tender of her sex. Sir C. Most nobly and warmly said, Mr. Heartly.- Go to her, nephew directly,-throw yourself at her feet, and swear how much her beauty and virtue have captivated you, and don't let her go till you have set her dear little heart at rest. Young C. Would you have me say the same thing over and over again?—I can't do it positively-It is my turn to be piqued now. Sir C. Damn your conceit, Jack; I can bear it no longer. Heart. I am very sorry to find that any young lady so near and dear to me, should bestow her heart where there is so little prospect of its being However, I shall not opvalued as it ought.pose my authority to her inclinations; and so— Who waits there? Enter a SERVANT. Let the young lady know that I shall attend her commands in the library. [Exit SERVANT.] Will you excuse me, gentlemen? Sir C. Ay, ay-we'll leave you to yourselves; and pray convince her that I and my nephew are most sincerely her very humble servants. Young C. O yes, you may depend upon me. Heart. A very slender dependence truly. [Aside; Exit. Young C. We'll be with you again to know what your tête à tête produces, and in the meanand yoursAdieu. Come time I am hersuncle-Fal, lal, la, la! Sir C. I could knock him down with pleasure. [Aside; Exeunt. ACT II. SCENE I-A Library. HEARTLY and a SERVANT discovered. Heart. Tell Miss Harriot that I am here.-If she is indisposed, I will wait upon her in her own room. [Exit SERVANT.] However mysterious her conduct appears to me, yet still it is to be deciphered- This young gentleman has certainly touched her-There are some objections to him, and among so many young men of fashion that fall in her way, she certainly might have Lucy. She desires that when she has recovered made a better choice: she has an understanding to be sensible of this; and, if I am not mistaken, herself, she may talk with you alone, Sir. [To HEARTLY. it is a struggle between her reason and her pas sion that occasions all this confusion.-But here Heart. I shall with pleasure attend her. [Exit Lucy. she is. Sir C. I would give, old as I am, a leg or an arm to be beloved by that sweet creature as you are, Jack! Young C. And throw your gout and rheumatism into the bargain, uncle? -Ha, ha, Divine Bacchus. La, la, la, &c. [Sings. Sir C. I wonder what the devil is come to the young fellows of this age, neighbour Heartly? Why a fine woman has no effect upon 'em.-Is there no method to make 'em less fond of themselves, and more mindful of the ladies? Heart. Look ye, Mr. Clackit, if Miss Harriot's affections declare for you, she must not be treated with neglect or disdain- -Nor could I bear it, Sır.-Any man must be proud of her partiality to him; and he must be fashionably insensible indeed, who would not make it his darling care to Enter HARRIOT. Har. I hope you are not angry, Sir, that I left you so abruptly, without making any apology? Heart. I am angry that you think an apology necessary.-The matter we were upon was of such a delicate nature, that I was more pleased with your confusion than I should have been with your excuses. You'll pardon me my dear. Har. I have reflected that the person for whom I have conceived a most tender regard, may, from the wisest motives, doubt of my passion; and therefore I would endeavour to answer all his objections, and convince him how deserving he is of my highest esteem. Heart. I have not yet apprehended what kind of dispute could arise between you and Mr |