Never return to mine own house again? Estif. [within.] I'm going presently. I'm like the people that live in the sweet islands: Let's have our house again immediately; Estif. Not a pin, I warrant ye. Per. And let them instantly depart. Estif. They shall both; there's reason in all courtesy; For by this time I know she has acquainted him, And has provided too: she sent me word, sir, And will give over gratefully unto you. Per. I will walk in the church-yard; The dead cannot offend more than these living. An hour hence I'll expect ye. Estif. I'll not fail, sir. Per. And do you hear? let's have a handsome dinner, And see all things be decent as they have been; But if I come not at my hour, come thither, tesy; And pray you, be brave for my sake. Per. I observe ye. SCENE III-A street. [Exeunt. And if we stay a night, we're gone for company. Enter JUAN DE CASTRO, SANCHIO, and CACAThere's an old woman, that's now grown to mar ble, FOGO. San. Thou'rt very brave. Caca. I've reason, I have money. Caca. Yes, and rhyme too, captain. Caca. Ye've manners; ever thank him, that has money. San. Wilt thou lend me any? Caca. Not a farthing, captain: Captains are casual things. San. Why so are all men. Thou shalt have my bond. Caca. Not bonds, nor fetters, captain. My money is my own, I make no doubt on't. Caca. Put it to pious uses. And you shall, presently, to your own house, sir: Buy wine and wenches, and undo young coxThe remembrance of this small vexation Will be argument of mirth for ever. Is there any thing here to cat But one another, like a race of cannibals? combs Juan. A provident charity. Are you for the wars, sir? Caca. I am not poor enough to be a soldier, Nor have I faith enough to ward a bullet; There is no lining for a trench, I take it. Juan. Ye have said wisely. Caca. Had you but my money, You'd swear it, colonel. I had rather drill at home A hundred thousand crowns, and with more ho nour, Than exercise ten thousand fools with nothing. A wise man safely feeds, fools cut their fingers. San. A right state usurer. Why dost not marry, And live a reverend justice? Caca. Is it not nobler to command a reverend justice, than to be one? And for a wife, what need I marry, captain, When every courteous fool, that owes me money, Owes me his wife too, to appease my fury? Juan. Wilt thou go to dinner with us? Caca. I will go, and view the pearl of Spain, the orient Fair one, the rich one too; and I will be respected. I bear my patent here; I will talk to her; Old Wom. Ha! What would ye have? Old Wom. Are your trunks all open? And chains and jewels. How she smells like hung beef, The palsy, and pick-locks! Fye, how she belches The spirit of garlic! Old Wom. Where's your gentlewoman? Per. What's that to my question? Per. Yes, sir: is that a wonder? Old Wom. Is she duly and truly your wife? Per. Duly and truly my wife! I think so, For I married her. It was no vision, sure! Maid. She has the keys, sir. Per. I know she has; but who has all my goods, spirit? Old Wom. If you be married to that gentle woman, You are a wretched man: she has twenty husbands. Maid. She tells you true. Old Wom. And she has cozened all, sir. Per. The devil she has! I had a fair house with her, Juan. The duke dines there to-day too, the That stands hard by, and furnished royally. duke of Medina. Caca. Let the king dine there! He owes me money, and so far's my creature, And certainly I may make bold with mine own, Old Wom. You're cozened too; 'tis none of her's, good gentleman, It is a lady's. Maid. The lady Margaritta; she was her ser vant, And kept the house; but going from her, sir, Per. Plague o' the devil! Am I, in the full meridian of my wisdom, Old Wom. A young sweet lady. Old Wom. She's indeed but little, but she's wondrous fair. Per. I feel I'm cozened: She had two women at the door attending, -I heard your trunks too Per. They were mine while they were laden; But now they've cast their calves, they're not worth owning, Was she her mistress, say you? Old Wom. Her own mistress, her very mistress, sir; and all you saw About and in that house was hers. Per. No plate, no jewels, nor no hangings? Old Wom. Abominable poor, as poor as we are, Per. I'm mad now: I think I am as poor as she, I'm wild else. Old Wom. You may find the truth as soon. Alas, a thousand concealed corners, sir, she lurks in; And here she gets a fleece, and there another, And lives in mists and smokes where none can find her. Per. Is she a whore too? Old Wom. Little better, gentleman: I dare not say she is so, sir, because She's yours, sir: these five years she has firked A pretty living. Per. She has firked me finely. A whore and thief; two excellent moral learnings In one she saint. I hope to see her legend. Caught in my own noose? Here's a rial left yet; There's for your lodging, and your meat for a week; A silk-worm lives at a more plentiful ordinary, If I do find you were an accessary, 'Tis but the cutting off two smoaking minutes! I'll hang ye presently. Old Wom. And I deserve it-I tell you truth, Per. Not I, I am an ass, mother. Old Wom. O the rogue, the villain! Is this usage for the fair sex. [Exeunt. SCENE V.-A grand apartment. Enter the DUKE OF MEDINA, JUAN DE CASTRO, ALONZO, SANCHIO, CACAFOGO, and Attendants. Duke. A goodly house. Juan. And richly furnished too, sir. Alon. Hung wantonly; I like that preparation; It stirs the blood into a hopeful banquet, And intimates the mistress free and jovial; I love a house, where pleasure prepares wel come. Duke. Now, Cacafogo, how like you this mansion? 'Twere a brave pawn. Caca. I shall be master of it; 'Twas built for my bulk, the rooms are wide and spacious, Airy, and full of ease, and that I love well. How my affection stands to the young lady. Enter MARGARITTA, ALTEA, Ladies, and Mar. All welcome to your grace, and to these soldiers! You honour my poor house with your fair pre sence; Those few slight pleasures, that inhabit here, sir, I do beseech your grace command; they're yours; Your servant but preserves them to delight ye. Duke. I thank ye, lady. I am bold to visit ye, Once more to bless mine eyes with your sweet beauty. It has been a long night, since you left the court, For, till I saw you now, no day broke to me. Mar, Bring in the duke's meat. San. She's most excellent. Juan. Most admirablę fair, as e'er I looked on; I rather would command her than my regiment. Caca. I'll have a fling; 'tis but a thousand ducats, Which I can cozen up in ten days. Enter LEON. Mar. Why, where's this dinner? Nor shall.it be, until I know the guests too, Are miracles a-foot again? Mar. Why, sirrah; why, sirrah, you! Leon. I hear you, saucy woman; And, as you are my wife, command your ab sence, And know your duty; 'tis the crown of modesty. Duke. Your wife! Leon. Yes, good my lord, I am her husband, And, pray, take notice, that I claim that honour, And will maintain it. Caca. If thou be'st her husband, I am determined thou shalt be my cuckold; Leon. Peace, dirt and dunghill! I will not lose my anger on a rascal. Caca. I'll talk with you another time. [Exit. San. Is this the fellow That had the patience to become a fool, I am astonished! Mar. I'll be divorced immediately. You shall not have so much will to be wicked. I am more tender of your honour, lady. You took me to gloss over your discredit, You had thought you had found a coxcomb. Mar. I do command ye from me, thou poor fellow, Thou cozened fool! Leon. Thou cozened fool! I will not be commanded: I'm above ye. And hold it to my use; the law allows it. Mar. Am I braved thus in mine own house? You are deceived, I'm lord of it, I rule it, But as a servant to sweep clean the lodgings, And so I'll keep it. Mar. Tis well. Leon. It shall be better. Mar. As you love me, give way. Leon. I will give none, madam; I stand upon the ground of my own honour, Juan. Brave! a strange conversion; thou shalt lead In chief now. Duke. Is there no difference betwixt her and you, sir? Leon. Not now, my lord; my fortune makes me even, And, as I am an honest man, I'm nobler. Leon. Let me see who dares get it, Till I command; I'll make him draw your coach, I give you liberty; and take your people, She would even now swoon, if she could not cry, Else they were excellent, and I should grieve, too; But falling thus, they shew nor sweet nor orient. And calls the sword of justice to relieve me, [Draws. I have a cause will kill a thousand of ye. band's freedom, The husband's curse stick to him, a tamed cuc kold! His wife be fair and young; but most dishonest, Duke. I've better thought. I pray, sir, use your wife well. Leon. Mine own humanity will teach me that, sir. And now, you're welcome all, and we'll to dinner; This is my wedding-day. Duke. I'll cross your joy yet. She's yours now, why should I look after her? Juan. I've seen a miracle; hold thine own, sol- Since that first hour I came I never saw her. dier! Sure they dare fight in fire, that conquer women. Enter PEREZ. Per. 'Save ye, which is the lady of the house? Leon. That's she, sir, that good-natured pretty lady, If you'd speak with her. Juan. Don Michael! Per. I saw her later-would the devil had had her! It is all true, I find; a wild-fire take her! Art thou a man yet? Alon. When shall we come and visit thee? San. And eat some rare fruit? Thou hast admirable orchards. Per. Pray do not know me, I am full of busi-You are so jealous now! Pox on your jealousy, Per. Was she a maid do you think? Per. Was she your kinswoman? Mar. You may reclaim her; 'twas a wild young girl. Per. Is not this house mine, madam? And ne'er remember yet I gave And every thing you see about the building; Per. Where is your maid? Mar. Do you not know, that have her? SCENE I-A street. Enter PEREZ. How scornfully you look! Per. Prithee leave fooling. I'm in no humour now to fool and prattle, Did she ne'er play the wag with you? Mar. Yes, many times, So often that I was ashamed to keep her. Per. I thank ye; I am blest still; Juan. You'll stay and dine? Per. Certain I cannot, captain. Hark in thine ear, I am the arrantest puppy, The miserablest ass! But I must leave ye. I am in haste, in haste. Bless you, good madam, And may you prove as good as my wife! Leon. What then, sir? Per. No matter, if the devil had one to fetch the other. [Exit PEREZ Leon. Will you walk in, sir? will your grace but honour me, And taste our dinner? You are nobly welcome. All anger's past, I hope, and I shall serve ye. ACT IV. [Exeunt, I'm glad I have found ye; for, in truth, I am weary, Weary and lame with looking out your lordship. Estif. I believe you, and very lately, too. To seek your ladyship, I have been in cellars, At last, I went to church to seek you out; Estif. You had a pretty progress; I'll tell mine now. To look you out, I went to twenty taverns Per. And are you sober? Estif. Yes, I recl not yet, sir; 1 |