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Mrs Oak. I say—a—a—[Stammering.] Is she | woman!-No place but my own house to serve handsoine?

Oak. Prodigiously handsome indeed. Mrs Oak. Prodigiously handsome! and is she reckoned a sensible girl?

your purposes?

Oak. Lord, this is the strangest misapprehension! I am quite astonished.

Mrs Oak. Astonished! yes-confused, detected, betrayed by your vain confidence of imposing on me. Why, sure you imagine me an idiot, a driyeller. Charles, indeed! yes, Charles is a fine excuse for you. The letter this morn

Oak. A very sensible, modest, agreeable young lady, as ever I knew. You would be extremely fond of her, I am sure. You can't imagine how happy I was in her company. Poor Charles! she soon made a conquest of him; and no wondering, the letter, Mr Ŏakly! she has so many elegant accomplishments! such an infinite fund of cheerfulness and good humour! Why, she's the darling of the whole country.

Mrs Oak. Lord! you seem quite in raptures

about her.

Oak. Raptures! not at all. I was only telling you the young lady's character. I thought you would be glad to find that Charles had made so sensible a choice, and was so likely to be happy. Mrs Oak. O, Charles! True, as you say, Charles will be mighty happy.

Oak. Don't you think so?

Mrs Oak. I am convinced of it. Poor Charles! I am much concerned for him. He must be very uneasy about her. I was thinking whether we could be of any service to him in this affair.

Oak. Was you, my love? that is very good of you. Let me see? How can we manage it? Gad! I have hit it. The luckiest thought! and it will be of great service to Charles.

Mrs Oak. Well, what is it? [Eagerly.]-You know I would do any thing to serve Charles, and oblige you. [Mildly.

Oak. That is so kind! Lord, my dear, if you would but always consider things in this proper light, and continue this amiable temper, we should be the happiest people

Mrs Oak. I believe so: but what's your proposal?

Oak. I am sure you'll like it. Charles, you know, may perhaps be so lucky as to meet with this lady

Mrs Oak. True.

Oak. The letter! why, sure that

Mrs Oak. Is sufficiently explained. You have made it very clear to me. Now I am convinced. I have no doubt of your perfidy. But I thank you for some hints you have given me, and you may be sure I shall make use of them: nor will I rest, till I have full conviction, and overwhelm you with the strongest proof of your baseness towards me.

Oak. Nay, but

Mrs Oak. Go, go! I have no doubt of your
falsehood: away!
[Erit MRS OAKLY.
Oak. Was there ever any thing like this? Such
unaccountable behaviour! angry I don't know
why! jealous of I know not what! pretending to be
satisfied merely to draw me in, and then creating
imaginary proofs out of an innocent conversa-
tion!Hints!-bints I have given her !—
What can she mean?-

TOILET crossing the stage.
Toilet! where are you going?

Toilet. To order the porter to let in no com-
pany to my lady to-day. She won't see a single
soul, sir.
! Now will she
sit all day feeding on her suspicions, till she has
convinced herself of the truth of them,

Oak. What an unhappy woman rit TOILET.

JOHN crossing the stage,

Well, sir, what's your business?
John. Going to order the chariot, sir.-My la-
dy's going out immediately. [Exit JOHN.
Oak. Going out! what is all this?-But every

Oak. Now, I was thinking, that he might, with way she makes me miserable. Wild and ungo

your leave, my dear

Mrs Oak. Well!

Oak. Bring her home here

Mrs Oak. How!

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SCENE III.-LADY FREELOVE's house. Enter LADY FREELOVE with a card-Servant following.

Lady Free. [Reading as she enters. And 'will take the liberty of waiting on her ladyship en cavalier, as he comes from the menége.'Does any body wait that brought this card?

Ser. Lord Trinket's servant is in the hall, madam.

Lady Free. My compliments, and I shall be glad to see his lordship.-Where is Miss Russet? Ser. In her own chamber, madam.

Lady Free. What is she doing?
Ser. Writing, I believe, madam.
Lady Free. Oh! ridiculous!-scribbling to that
Oakly, I suppose. [Apart.]-Let her know I
should be glad of her company here.

[Exit SERVANT, It is a mighty troublesome thing to manage a simple girl, that knows nothing of the world. Harriot, like all other girls, is foolishly fond of this young fellow of her own chusing, her first love, that is to say, the first man that is particularly civil, and the first air of consequence which a young lady gives herself. Poor silly soul !— But Oakly must not have her positively. A match with lord Trinket will add to the dignity of the family. I must bring her into it. I will throw her into his way as often as possible, and leave him to make his party good as fast as he can But here she comes.

Enter HARRIOT.

have fine eyes, child! And they have made fine work with lord Trinket.

Har. Lord Trinket!

[Contemptuously.

Lady Free. Yes, lord Trinket: you know it as well as I do; and yet, you ill-natured thing, you will not vouchsafe him a single smile. But you must give the poor soul a little encouragement, prithee do.

Har. Indeed, I cannot, madam, for of all ||mankind Lord Trinket is my aversion.

Lady Free. Why so, child? He is counted a well-bred, sensible young fellow, and the women all think him handsome.

Har. Yes, he is just polite enough to be able to be very unmannerly with a great deal of good breeding; is just handsome enough to make him most excessively vain of his person; and has just reflection enough to finish him for a coxcomb; qualifications, which are all very common among those whom your ladyship calls men of quality.

Well! Harriot, still in the pouts? nay, prithee, Lady Free. A satirist, too! Indeed, my dear, my dear little run-away girl, be more cheerful! this affectation sits very awkwardly upon you.your everlasting melancholy puts me into the va-There will be a superiority in the behaviour of pours. persons of fashion.

Har. Dear madam, excuse nie. How can I be cheerful in my present situation? I know my father's temper so well, that I am sure this step of mine must almost distract him. I sometimes wish that I had remained in the country, let what would have been the consequence.

Har. A superiority, indeed! For his lordship alway behaves with so much insolent familiarity, that I should almost imagine he was soliciting me for other favours, rather than to pass my whole life with him.

Lady Free. Innocent freedoms, child, which every fine woman expects to be taken with her, an acknowledgement of her beauty. Har. They are freedoms, which, I think, no innocent woman can allow.

Lady Free. Romantic to the last degree! Why, you are in the country still, Harriot! Enter Servant.

Lady Free. Why, it is a naughty child, that's certain; but it need not be so uneasy about pa-as pa, as you know that I wrote by last night's post, to acquaint him, that his little lost sheep was safe, and that you are ready to obey his commands in every particular, except marrying that oaf, sir Harry Beagle.-Lord! Lord! what a difference there is between a country and town education! Why, a London lass would have jumped out of a window into a gallant's arms, and without thinking of her father, unless it were to have drawn a few bills on him, been an hun

dred miles off in nine or ten hours, or perhaps out of the kingdom in twenty-four.

Har. I fear I have already been too precipiItate. I tremble for the consequences.

Ser. My lord Trinket, madam.

[Exit Servant. Lady Free. I swear now I have a good mind to tell him all you have said.

Enter LORD TRINKET in boots, &c. as from the
Riding-house.

Your lordship's most obedient humble servant.

Lady Free. I swear, child, you are a downright Lord Trink. Your ladyship does me too much prude. Your way of talking gives me the spleen; honour. Here I am en bottine as you see—just so full of affection, and duty, and virtue, 'tis just come from the menege. Miss Russet, I am your like a funeral sermon. And yet, pretty soul! it slave. I declare it makes me quite happy to find can love. Well, I wonder at your taste; a sneak-you together. 'Pon honour, madam, [To HARing simple gentleman! without a title! and when, to my knowledge, you might have a man of quality to-morrow.

Har. Perhaps so. Your ladyship must excuse me, but many a man of quality would make me miserable.

RIOT.] I begin to conceive great hopes of you: and, as for you, Lady Freelove, I cannot sufficiently commend your assiduity with your fair pupil. She was before possessed of every grace that nature could bestow on her, and nobody is so well qualified as your ladyship to give her the Bon Ton.

Lady Free. Indeed, my dear, these antediluvian notions will never do now-a-days; and, at Har. Compliment and contempt all in a the same time, too, those little wicked eyes of breath! My lord, I am obliged to you. But wa yours speak a very different language. Indeed youving my acknowledgements, give me leave to ask

your lordship, whether nature and the Bon Ton (as you call it) are so different, that we must give up one, in order to obtain the other?

and your brother, but tell me the news. Do you know any thing of my father?

Lord Trink. Your father, madam, is now in town. This fellow, you must know, is now groom to sir Harry Beagle, your sweet rural swain, and

Lord Trink. Totally opposite, madam. The chief aim of the Bon Ton is to render persons of family different from the vulgar, for whom, in-informed me, that his master and your father deed, nature serves very well. For this reason, were running all over the town in quest of you; it has, at various times, been ungenteel to see, to and that he himself had orders to enquire after hear, to walk, to be in good health, and to have you; for which reason, I suppose, he came to twenty other horrible perfections of nature. Na- the riding-house stables to look after it, thinking ture, indeed, may do very well sometimes. It made it, to be sure, a very likely place to meet you.— you, for instance, and it then made something Your father, perhaps, is gone to seek you at the very lovely; and if you would suffer us of quali-Tower, or Westminster-Abbey, which is all the ty to give you the Ton, you would be absolutely idea he has of London; and your faithful lover divine: but now→→ -me-madam-me- is probably cheapening a hunter, and drinking nature never made such a thing as me, strong beer at the Horse and Jockey in Smithfield.

Har. Why, indeed, I think your lordship has very few obligations to her.

Lady Free. The whole set admirably disposed

Har. Did not your lordship inform him where I was?

Lord Trink. Then, you really think it's all myof! own? I declare now that is a mighty genteel compliment. Nay, if you begin to flatter already, you improve apace. 'Pon honour, lady Freelove, I believe we shall make something of her at

last.

Lady Free. No doubt on't. It is in your lordship's power to make her a complete woman of fashion at once.

Lord Trink. Hum! Why, ay

Har. Your lordship must excuse me. I am of a very tasteless disposition. I shall never bear to be carried out of nature.

Lord Trink. Not I, 'pon honour, madam:that I left to their own ingenuity to discover.

Lady Free. And, pray, my lord, where, in this town, have this polite company bestowed themselves?

Lord Trink. They lodge, madam, of all places in the world, at the Bull and Gate Inn, in Holborn.

Lady Free. Ha, ha, ha! The Bull and Gate! Incomparable! What, have they brought any

Lord Trink. Very well, lady Freelove! very well, indeed! There they are, like so many graziers; and there, it seems, they have learned that this lady is certainly in London.

Lady Free. You are out of nature, now, Har-hay or cattle to town? riot! I am sure no woman but yourself ever objected to being carried among persons of quality. Would you believe it, my lord? here has she been a whole week in town, and would never suffer me to introduce her to a rout, an assembly, a concert, or even to court, or to the opera; nay, would hardly so much as mix with a living soul that has visited me.

Har. Do, dear madam, send a card directly to my father, informing him where I am, and that your ladyship would be glad to see him here. For my part, I dare not venture into his presence till you have, in some measure, pacified him; but, for Heaven's sake, desire him not to

Lord Trink. No wonder, madam, you do not adopt the manners of persons of fashion, when you will not even honour them with your compa-bring that wretched fellow along with him. ny. Were you to make one in our little coteries, we should soon make you sick of the boors and bumpkins of the horrid country. By the bye, I met a monster at the riding-house this morning, who gave me some intelligence, that will surprize you, concerning your family?

Har. What intelligence?

Lady Free. Who was this monster, as your lordship calls him? A curiosity, I dare say.

Lord Trink. This monster, madam, was formerly my head groom, and had the care of all my running-horses; but, growing most abominably surly and extravagant, as you know all these fellows do, I turned him off; and, ever since, my brother, Slouch Trinket, has had the care of my stud, rides all my principal matches himself—

and

Har. Dear my lord, don't talk of your groom,

Lord Trink. Wretched fellow! Oho! Courage, Milor Trinket! [Aside. Lady Free. I'll send immediately. Who's there?

Enter Servant.

Ser. [Apart to LADY FREELOVE.] Sir Harry Beagle is below, madam.

Lady Free. [Apart to Servant.] I am not at home. Have they let him in? Ser. Yes, madam.

Lady Free. How abominably unlucky this is! Well, then, shew him into my dressing-room. I will come to him there. [Exit Servant.

Lord Trink. Lady Freelove! No engagement, I hope. We won't part with you, 'pon honour.

Lady Free. The worst engagement in the world. A pair of musty old prudes! Lady Formal and Miss Prate.

Lord Trink. O the beldams! As nauseous as ipecacuanha, 'pon honour.

Lady Free. Lud! lud! what shall I do with them? Why do these foolish women come troubling me now? I must wait on them in the dressing-room, and you must excuse the card, Harriot, till they are gone. I'll dispatch them as soon as I can; but Heaven knows when I shall get rid of them, for they are both everlasting gossips; though the words come from her ladyship one by one, like drops from a still, while the other tiresome woman overwhelms us with a flood of impertinence. Harriot, you'll entertain his lordship till I return. [Erit.

Lord Trink. Gone! 'Egad, my affairs here begin to grow very critical-the father in town! lover in town! Surrounded by enemies! What shall I do?-To HARRIOT.]-I have nothing fit for it but a coup de main. 'Pon honour, I am not sorry for the coming in of these old tabbies, and am much obliged to her ladyship for leaving us such an agreeable téte-a-téte.

Har. Your lordship will find me extremely bad company;

Lord Trink. Not in the least, my dear! we'll entertain ourselves one way or other, I'll warrant you. 'Egad, I think it a mighty good opportunity to establish a better acquaintance with

you.

Har. I don't understand you.

Lord Trink. No? Why, then, I'll speak plainer.-[Pausing, and looking her full in the face.] You are an amazing fine creature, 'pon honour.

Har. If this be your lordship's polite conversation, I shall leave you to amuse yourself in soliloquy. [Going.

Lord Trink. No, no, no, madam; that must not be.-[Stopping her.]-This place, my passion, the opportunity, all conspire

Har. How, sir! You don't intend to do me any violence?'

Lord Trink. 'Pon honour, madam, it will be doing great violence to myself, if I do not. You

must excuse me.

[Struggling with her. Har. Help! Help! Murder! Help! Lord Trink. Your yelping will signify nothing; nobody will come. [Struggling. Har. For Heaven's sake! Sir! My lord! [Noise within.

Lord Trink. Pox on't! what noise? Then I must be quick. [Still struggling. Har. Help! Murder! Help! Help!

Enter CHARLES hastily.

Cha. What do I hear? My Harriot's voice calling for help? Ha!-[Seeing them.]—Is it possible? Turn, ruffian! I'll find you employment.

[Drawing. Lord Trink. You are a most impertinent

scoundrel, and I'll whip you through the lungs, 'pon honour.

[They fight, HARRIOT runs out, screaming help, &c.

Enter LADY FREELOVE, SIR HARRY BEAGLE, and Servants.

Lady Free. How's this? Swords drawn in my house!-Part them-[They are parted.]—This is the most impudent thing!

Lord Trink. Well, rascal, I shall find a time; I know you, sir!

Cha. The sooner the better; I know your lordship, too.

Sir Har. I'faith, madam,-[To LADY FREE.] we had like to have been in at the death.

Lady Free. What is all this? Pray, sir, what is the meaning of your coming hither to raise this disturbance? Do you take my house for a brothel? [TO CHA. Cha. Not I, indeed, madam! but I believe his lordship does.

Lord Trink. Impudent scoundrel! Lady Free. Your conversation, sir, is as insolent as your behaviour. Who are you? What brought you here?

Cha. I am one, madam, always ready to draw my sword in defence of innocence in distress, and more especially in the cause of that lady I delivered from his lordship's fury; in search of whom troubled your ladyship's house.

Lady Free. Her lover, I suppose, or what? Cha. At your ladyship's service; though not quite so violent in my passion as his lordship

there.

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Enter a Servant.

Where is Miss Russet?
Ser. Gone out, madam.

Lady Free. Gone out! Where?

Ser. I don't know, madam: but she ran down the back stairs crying for help, crossed the servants' hall in tears, and took a chair at the door. Lady Free. Blockheads! to let her go out in a chair alone! Go, and inquire after her immediately. [Exit Ser. Sir Har. Gone! What a pox, had I just rum

her down, and is the little puss stole away at last?

Lady Free. Sir, if you will walk in-[To SIR HAR. with his lordship and me, perhaps you may hear some tidings of her; though it is most probable she may be gone to her father. I don't know any other friend she has in town.

Cha. I am heartily glad she is gone. She is safer any where than in this house.

Lady Free. Mighty well, sir! My lord! Sir Harry! I attend you.

Lord Trink. You shall hear from me, sir!

[TO CHA.

Cha. Very well, my lord. Sir Har. Stole away! Pox on't-stole away. [Exeunt SIR HAR. and LORD TRINK. Lady Free. Before I follow the company, give me leave to tell you, sir, that your behaviour here has been so extraordinary

Cha. My treatment here, madam, has indeed been very extraordinary.

Lady Free. Indeed! Well-no matter-permit me to acquaint you, sir, that there lies your way out, and that the greatest favour you can do me, is to leave the house immediately.

Cha. That your ladyship may depend on.Since you have put Miss Russet to flight, you may be sure of not being troubled with my company. I'll after her immediately-I cannot rest till I know what is become of her.

Lady Free. If she has any regard for her reputation, she'll never put herself into such hands as yours.

Cha. O, madam, there can be no doubt of her regard for that, by her leaving your ladyship. Lady Free. Leave my house!

Cha. Directly. A charming house! And a charming lady of the house, too! Ha, ha, ha! Lady Free. Vulgar fellow ! Cha. Fine lady!

[Exeunt severally.

ACT III.

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best way.

Lady Free. For shame, for shame, my lord! I am quite hurt at your want of discretion.Leave the whole conduct of this affair to me, or I'll have done with it at once. How strangely you have acted! There, I went out of the way on purpose to serve you, by keeping off that looby sir Harry Beagle, and preventing him or her father from seeing the girl, till we had some chance of managing her ourselves. And then you chose to make a disturbance, and spoiled all.

Lord Trink. Devil take sir Harry and t'other Scoundrel, too! That they should come driving hither just at so critical an instant! And that the wild little thing should take wing, and fly away the lord knows whither!

Lady Free. Ay-And there again you was indiscreet past redemption. To let her know, that her father was in town, and where he was to be found, too! For there I am confident she must be gone, as she is not acquainted with one creature in London.

Lord Trink. Why a father is, in these cases, the pisaller I must confess. 'Pon honour, lady

Freelove, I can scarce believe this obstinate girl a relation of yours. Such narrow notions! I'll swear, there is less trouble in getting ten women of the premiere volée, than in conquering the scruples of a silly girl in that style of life.

Lady Free. Come, come, my lord, a truce with your reflections on my niece! Let us consider what is best to be done.

Lord Trink. E'en just what your ladyship thinks proper-For my part, I am entirely dérangée.

Lady Free. Will you submit to be governed by me, then?

Lord Trink. I'll be all obedience—your ladyship's slave, 'pon honour.

Lady Free. Why, then, as this is rather an ugly affair in regard to me, as well as your lordship, and may make some noise, I think it absolutely necessary, merely to save appearances, that you should wait on her father, palliate matters as well as you can, and make a formal repetition of your proposal of marriage.

Lord Trink. Your ladyship is perfectly in the right- -You are quite au fait of the affair. It shall be done immediately, and then your reputation will be safe, and my conduct justified to all the world-But, should the old rustic continue as stubborn as his daughter, your ladyship, I hope, has no objections to my being a little rusée, for I must have her, 'pon honour.

Lady Free. Not in the least.

Lord Trink. Or, if a good opportunity should offer, and the girl should be still untractable

Lady Free. Do what you will, I wash my hands of it. She's out of my care now, you know- -But you must beware your rivals. One, you know, is in the house with her, and the other

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