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all this company.
we'll there clear up the affair before the whole Mrs Tem. (Behind.] I say, you feather-headcompany,
ed puppy, he is in this house; my own servant Tor. [Speaking apart to Lesson and Con.] saw bim come in, and I will not stir till I find This gentleman's letter has already cleared it up
him. to my entire satisfaction; and I don't know whe Gen. Sao. She here ! then, deliberation is over, ther I am most pleased with his wit, or charmed and I am entirely blown up. with his probity. However, Mr Leeson, I used Lady Rach. I'll take notes of this affair. the bailiffs sadly. Bailiffs are generally sad fel
Enter MRS TEMPLE. lows to be sure; but we must love justice for our own sakes.
Mrs Tem. Mighty well, sir ! So you are in Lee. Unquestionably, sir; and they shall be love, it seems and you want to be married, it amply recompensed for the merit of their suffer- seems? ings.
Lee. My blessed aunt ! O, how proud I am of Con. And the merit of suffering, I fancy, is the the relation ! only merit that is ever likely to fall to the share Gen. Sav. Dear Bab, give me quarter before of a sherift's officer.
Tor. One word—one word more, Mr Leeson. Mrs Tem. You are in love, you old fool, are I have inquired your character, and like it you? and you want to marry Miss Walsingham, like it much. Forgive the forwardness of an old indeed! You must not want money you must
Con. I never heard a pleasanter spoken gennot, indeed
tlewoman -O honey, if I had the taming of Lee. Sir
her, she should never be abusive, without keepTor. Pray don't be offended-I mean to give ing a civil tongue in her head. my friends but little trouble about iny affairs Mrs Tem. Well, sir, and when is the happy when I am gone. I love to see the people hap- day to be fixed ? py that my furtune is to make so; and shall Bel. What the devil, is this true, general? think it a treason against humanity to leave a Gen. True-Can you believe such an absurshilling more than the bare expences of my fune- dity? ral. Breakfast with me in the morning.
Mrs Tem. Why, will you deny, you miserable Lee. You overwhelm me with this generosity; old mumıny, that you made proposals of marbut a happy revolution in my fortunes, which riage to her? you will soon know, renders it wholly unneces Gen. Sav. Yes I do—no, I don't-proposals of sary for me to trouble you.
marriage ! Čon. (Wiping his eyes.] Upon my soul, this is Miss Wal. In favour of your son—I'll help a most worthy old crater—to be his own execu- him out a little.
[Aside. If I was to live any long time among Gen. Sav. Yes, in favour of my sonsuch people, they would soon be the death of what the devil shall I do? me, with their very goodness.
Mrs Bel. Shall I take a lesson from this lady, · Mrs Bel. Miss Walsingham, captain Savage Mr Belville? Perhaps, if the women of virtue has been telling Mr Belville and me of a very were to pluck up a little spirit, they might be extraordinary mistake.
soon as well treated as kept mistresses. Miss Wal. 'Tis very strange, indeed; mistake Mrs Temp. Hark'e, general Savage, I believe on mistake
you assert a falsehood; but if you speak the Bel. 'Tis no way strange to find every body truth, give your son this moment to Miss Walproperly struck with the merit of Miss Walsing-singham, and let me be fairly rid of my rival. ham.
Gen. Sav. My son! Miss Walsingham! Miss Miss Wal. A compliment from you, now, Mr Walsingham, my son! Belville, is really worth accepting.
Bel. It will do, Horace; it will do. Gen. Suv. If I thought the affair could be kept Mrs Tem. No prevarications, general Savage ! a secret, by making the town over to my son, Do what I bid you instantly, or, by all the wrongs since I am utterly shut out myself
of an enraged woman, I'll so expose you! Capt. Sav. He seems exceedingly embarras Con. What a fine fellow this is to have the sed.
command of an army! Gen. Sao. If I thought that why, mortified Gen. Sav. If Miss Walsingham can be preas I must be in giving it up, I think I could re-vailed ponsolve upon the manæuvre, to save myself from Tor. O, she'll oblige you readily--but you universal ridicule: but it can't be; it can't be ; | must settle a good fortune upon your son. and I only double my own disappointment in re Mirs Tem. That he shall do. warding the disobedience of the rascal who has Mrs Bel. Miss Walsingham, my dear supplanted me. There! there! they are all Miss Wal. I can refuse nothing either to your talking of it, all laughing at me, and I shall run request, or to the request of the general. mad.
Gen. Sar. Oblige me with your hand, then, ma
dam: come here, you come here, captain. Lee. So there is, madam; and Mr Torrington, There, there is Miss Walsingham's hand for you. to whose goodness I am intinitely obliged, could
Con. And as pretty a little tist it is, as any in tell you some diverting anecdotes, that would enthe three kingdoms.
rich a comedy considerably.
to the credit of your character, young man. Capt. Sad. Mine is beyond the power of ex Bel. The day has been a busy one, thanks to pression.
the communicative disposition of the captain. Miss Wal. (Aside to the company.) And so is Mrs Bel. And the evening should be cheerful. the general's, I believe.
Bel. I shan't, therefore, part with one of you, Con. O, faith, that may be easily seen, by the till we have had a hearty laugh at our general sweetness of his countenance,
adventures. Tor. Well, the cause being now, at last, de Miss Wal. They have been very whimsical, termined, I think we may all retire from the indeed; yet, if represented on the stage, I hope
they would be found not only entertaining, but Gen. Sao. And without any great credit, I instructive. fear, to the general.
Lady Rach. Instructive ! why the modern criCon. By my soul, you may say that!
tics say, that the only business of comedy is to Mrs Tem. Do you murmur, sir? Come this make people laugh. moment home with me.
Bel. That is degrading the dignity of letters Gen. Sav. I'll go any where to hide this mi exceedingly, as well as lessening the utility of the serable head of mine : what a damned campaign stage. A good comedy is a capital effort of gehave I made of it!
nius, and should, therefore, be directed to the [Ereunt GENERAL SAVAGE and Mrs
noblest purposes. TEMPEST.
Miss Wal. Very true; and unless we learn Con. Upon my soul, if I was in the general's something while we chuckle, the carpenter, who place, I would divide the house with this devil; nails a pantomime together, will be entitled to I would keep within doors myself, and make her more applause, than the best comic poet in the take the outside.
(Exeunt omnes Lady Rach. Here's more food for a comedy.
SCENE I.- A street in Bath.
mind to gi't the slip, and whip! we were all off Coachman crosses the stage, Enter Fag, looking
at an hour's warning.
Fug. Ay, ay! hasty in every thing, or it would after him.
not be sir Anthony Absolute. Fag. WHAT! Thomas! Sure 'tis he? -What! Coach. But tell us, Mr Fag, how does young Thomas ! Thomas !
master? Odd! sir Anthony will stare to see the Coach, Hey! Odds life! Mr Fag! give us captain here ! your hand, my old fellow-servant.
Fug. I do not serve captain Absolute now.
Coach. I doubt, Mr Fag, you ha'n't changed
Coach. No! why, didn't you say you had left
you no farther-briefly then-Captain Absolute polish a little ; indeed you must Here, now, and ensign Beverley are one and the same per this wig! what the devil do you do with a wig,
Thomas ? none of the London wbips of any deCoach. The devil they are !
gree of ton wear wigs now. Fag. So it is indeed, Thomas; and the en Coach. More's the pity! more's the pity, I sign-half of my master being on guard at pre- say! Odd's life! when I heard how the lawyers sent—the captain has nothing to do with me. and doctors had took to their own hair, I thought
Coach. So, so! what, this is some freak, I how 'twould go next: Odd rabbit it! when the warrant! Do tell us, Mr Fag, the meaning o't- fashion had got foot on the bar, I guessed 'twould you know I ha' trusted you.
mount to the box ! but 'tis all out of character, Fag. You'll be secret, Thomas ?
believe me, Mr Fag: and look'ee, I'll never gi' Coach. As a coach-horse.
up mine; the lawyers and doctors may do as Fag. Why, then, the cause of all this is--they will. love-love, Thomas, who (as you may get read to Fug. Well, Thomas, we'll not quarrel about you) has been a masquerader ever since the days that. of Jupiter.
Coach. Why, bless you, the gentlemen of they Coach. Ay, ay; I guessed there was a lady in professions ben't all of a mind; for, in our vilthe case : but pray, why does your master pass lage now, thof Jack Gauge, the exciseman, bas only for ensign? now, if he had shammed ge- ta’en to his carrots, there's little Dick, the farneral indeed
rier, swears he'll never forsake bis bob, though Fag. Ah! Thomas, there lies the mystery of all the college should appear with their own the matter. Hark'e, Thomas; my master is in heads ! love with a lady of a very singular taste : a lady, Fag. Indeed! well said, Dick! but holdwho likes him better as a half-pay ensign, than mark! mark! Thomas. if she knew he was son and heir to sir Anthony Coach. Zooks ! 'tis the captain! Is that the Absolute, a baronet of three thousand a-year. lady with him?
Coach. That is an odd taste indeed - but has Fag. No, no! that is madam Lucy, my mas. she got the stuff
, Mr Fag? is she rich, hey? ter's mistress's maid. They lodge at that house. Fag. Rich! why, I believe she owns half the But I must after him, to tell him the news. stocks! Zounds! I'homas, she could pay
the Coach. Odd! he's giving her money! well, tional debt as easily as I could my washerwoman! | Mr FagShe has a lap-dog that eats out of gold; she Fag. Good by, Thomas ! I have an appointfeeds her parrot with small pearls; and all her ment in Gyde's Porch this evening at eight; meet thread papers are made of bank-notes !
me there, and we'll make a little party. Coach. 'Bravo! faith! Odd! I warrant she
(Ereunt severally, has a set of thousands at least : but does she draw kindly with the captain? Fag. As fond as pigeons.
SCENE II.-A dressing-room in Mrs MALACoach. May one hear her name?
Prop's lodgings. Fag. Miss Lydia Languish. But there is an Lydia sitting on a sopha, with a book in her old tough aunt in the way; though, by the by,
hand. she has never seen my master; for he got acquainted with miss while on a visit in Glouces
Enter Lucy, as just returned from a message. tershire.
Coach. Well, I wish they were once harnessed Lucy. Indeed, ma'am, I traversed half the together in matrimony. But pray, Mr Fag, what town in search of it: I don't believe there's a kiud of a place is this Bath?" I ha' heard a deal circulating library in Bath I ba’n’t been at. of it; here's a mort o' merry making-hey? Lydia. And could not you get 'The Reward
Fag. Pretty well, Thomas, pretty well; 'tis a of Coustancy?' good lounge : In the morning we go to the pump Lucy. No, indeed, ma'am. room (though neither my master nor I drink the Lydia. Nor “ The Fatal Connection? waters); after breakfast, we saunter on the pa Lucy. No, indeed, ma'am. rades, or play a ganie at billiards; at night we Lydia. Nor • The Mistakes of the fleart!' dance : but damn the place, I'm tired of it; their Lucy. Ma'am, as ill luck would have it, Mr regular hours stupify me! not a fiddle nor a card Bull said Miss Sukey Saunter had just fetched it aiter eleven ! however, Mr Faulkland's gentle- away. man and I keep it up a little in private parties. Lydia. Heigh-ho!-Did you inquire for "The I'll introduce you there, Thomas; you'll like hiin Delicate Distress?' much.
Lucy. Or, « The Memoirs of Lady Coach. Sure I know Mr Du-Peign; you know Woodford? Yes indeed, ma'am. I asked every his master is to marry madam Julia.
where for it; and I might have brought it from Fuy. I had forgot. But, Thomas, you must | Mr Frederick's; but lady Slattern Lounger, who
had just sent it home, had so soiled and dog's- known to him—But it is a Delia or a Celia, I eared it, it wa'n't fit for a christian to read. assure you !
Lydia. Heigh-ho!-Yes, I always know when Julia. Then, surely, she is now more indulLady Slattern has been before me. She has a gent to her niece? most observing thumb; and, I believe, cherishes Lydia. Quite the contrary. Since she has disher nails for the convenience of making marginal covered her own frailty, she is become more sus
Well, child, what have you brought me? picious of mine. Then I must inform you of Lucy. Oh! here, ma'am.
another plague! That odious Acres is to be in [Taking books from under her cloak, and Bath to-day; so that I protest I shall be teased froin her pockets.
out of all spirits! This is The Gordian Koot,' and this · Pere Julia. Come, come, Lydia, hope for the best. grive Pickle.' Here are • The 'Tears of Sensibi- Sir Anthony shall use his interest with Mrs Mality,' and Humphrev (Tinker.' This is · The laprop. Memoirs of a Lady of Quality, written by her Lydia. But you have not beard the worst : self,' and here the second volume of · The Sen- Unfortunately I had quarrelled with my poor timental Journey
Beverley, just before my aunt made the disLydia. Heigh-ho! What are those books by covery, and I have not seen him since, to make the glass?
Lucy. The great one is only « The Whole Julia. What was his offence? Duty of Man,' where I press
few blonds, Lydiu. Nothing at all! But, I don't know how ma'am.
it was, as often as we had been together, we had Lydia. Very well. Give me the sal volatile. pever had a quarrel : And, somehow, I was afraid Lucy. Is it in a blue cover, ma'am ?
he would never give me an opportunity. So, last Lydia. My smelling bottle, you simpleton ! Thursday, I wrote a letter to myself, to inform Lucy. O, the drops! here, ma’am.
myself that Beverley was at that time paying his Lydia. Hold! here's some one coming--quick, addresses to another woman. I signed iť • Your see who it is
[E.rit Lucy Friend Unknown,' shewed it to Beverley, charged Surely I heard my cousin Julia's voice!
bim with his falsehood, put myself in a violent
passion, and vowed I'd never see him more. Re-enler Lucy.
Julia. And you let himn depart so, and have Lucy. Lud! ma'am, here is Miss Melville ! not seen hin since ? Lydia. Is it possible?
Lydia. 'Twas the next day my aunt found the
matter out. I intended only to have teased him Enter JULIA.
three days and a half, and now I've lost him for My dearest Julia, bow delighted am I! [Em Julia. If he is as deserving and sincere as you brace.] How unexpected was this happiness! have represented bim to me, he will never give
Julia. True, Lydia; and our pleasure is the you up so. Yet consider, Lydia; you tell me he greater; but what has been the matter? You is but an ensigo, and you have thirty thousand were denied to me at first !
pounds! Lydia. Ah, Julia, I have a thousand things to Lydia. But you know I lose most of my fortell you ! but first inform me what has conjured tune if I marry without my aunt's consent, till of you to Bath? Is sir Anthony here?
age; and that is what I have determined to do, Julia. He is; we are arrived within this hour; ever since I knew the penalty. Nor could I love and, I suppose, he will be here to wait on Mrs the man, who would wish to wait a day for the Malaprop as soon as he is dressed.
alternative. Lydia. Then, before we are interrupted, let Julia. Nay, this is caprice! me impart to you some of my distress! I know Lydia. What, does Julia tax me with caprice? your gentle nature will sympathize with me, I thought her lover Faulkland had inured her though your prudence may condemn me: My to it. letters have informed you of my whole connec Julia. I do not love even his faults. tion with Beverley--but I have lost him, Julia ! Lydiu. But apropos! you have sent to him, I My aunt has discovered our intercourse, by a suppose ? note she intercepted, and has confined me ever Julia. Not yet, upon my word ! nor has lie the since. Yet, would you believe it? she has fallen least idea of my being in Bath. Sir Anthony's absolutely in love with a tall Irish baronet she resolution was so sudden, I could not inform him met one night since we have been here, at lady of it. Macshuftle's rout.
Lydia. Well, Julia, you are your own mistress, Julia. You jest, Lydia?
(though under the protection of sir Anthony) yet Lydia. No, upon my word! She really carries have you, for this long year, been a slave io the on a kind of correspondence with bim, under a caprice, the whim, the jealousy of this ungrateful feigned name though, till she chooses to be Faulktand, who will ever delay assuming the VOL. II.