1769. Talking of our feeling for the diftreffes of others;-JOHNSON. "Why, Sir, there is much noise made about it, but it is greatly exaggerated. No, Etat. 60. Sir, we have a certain degree of feeling to prompt us to do good: more than that, Providence does not intend. It would be mifery to no purpose." BOSWELL. "But fuppofe now, Sir, that one of your intimate friends were. apprehended for an offence for which he might be hanged." JOHNSON. "I should do what I could to bail him, and give him any other assistance; but if he were once fairly hanged, I fhould not suffer." BOSWELL. "Would you eat your dinner that day, Sir?" JOHNSON. "Yes, Sir; and eat it as if he were eating it with me. Why, there's Baretti, who is to be tried for his life to-morrow, friends have risen up for him on every side; yet if he should be hanged, none of them will eat a flice of plumb-pudding the lefs. Sir, that fympathetick feeling goes a very little way in depreffing the mind." I told him that I had dined lately at Foote's, who fhewed me a letter to him from Tom Davies, telling him that he had not been able to sleep from the concern which he felt on account of this fad affair of Baretti, begging of him to try if he could fuggeft any thing that might be of fervice to him; and at the fame time recommending to him an industrious young man who kept a pickle-shop. JOHNSON. "Aye, Sir, here you have a fpecimen of human fympathy; a friend hanged, and a cucumber pickled. We know not whether Baretti or the pickle-man has kept Davies from fleep, nor does he know himself. And as to his not fleeping, Sir; Tom Davies is a very great man; Tom has been upon the stage, and knows how to do thofe things: I have not been upon the stage, and cannot do those things." BoswELL. "I have often blamed myself, Sir, for not feeling for others as fenfibly as many fay they do." JOHNSON. "Sir, don't be duped by them any more. You will find these very feeling people are not very ready to do you good. They pay you by feeling." BOSWELL. "Foote has a great deal of humour ?" JOHNSON. "Yes, Sir." BOSWELL. "He has a fingular talent of exhibiting character." JOHNSON. "Sir, it is not a talent, it is a vice; it is what others abstain from. It is not comedy, which exhibits the character of a species, as that of a miser gathered from many mifers; it is farce, which exhibits individuals." BosWELL. "Did not he think of exhibiting you, Sir?" JOHNSON. "Sir, fear reftrained him; he knew I would have broken his bones. I would have faved him the trouble of cutting off a leg; I would not have left him a leg to cut off." BOSWELL. "Pray, Sir, is not Foote an infidel?" JOHNSON. "I do not know, Sir, that the fellow is an infidel; but if he be an infidel, he is an infidel as a dog 1769. is an infidel; that is to fay, he has never thought upon the fubject "." Etat. 60. BOSWELL. "I fuppofe, Sir, he has thought fuperficially, and seized the firft notions which occurred to his mind." JOHNSON. "Why then, Sir, ftill he is like a dog, that snatches the piece next him. Did you never observe that dogs have not the power of comparing? A dog will take a fmall bit of meat as readily as a large, when both are before him." "Buchanan (he obferved,) has fewer centos than any modern Latin poet. He not only had great knowledge of the Latin language, but was a great poetical genius. Both the Scaligers praise him." He again talked of the paffage in Congreve with high commendation, and faid, "Shakspeare never has fix lines together without a fault. Perhaps you may find seven: but this does not refute my general affertion. If I come to an orchard, and fay there's no fruit here, and then comes a poring man, who finds two apples and three pears, and tells me, Sir, you are mistaken, I have found both apples and pears,' I fhould laugh at him: what would that be to the purpose ?" BOSWELL. "What do you think of Dr. Young's Night Thoughts,' Sir ?"" JOHNSON. "Why, Sir; there are very fine things in them." BOSWELL. "Is there not less religion in the nation now, Sir, than there was formerly?" JOHNSON. "I don't know, Sir, that there is." BOSWELL. "For instance, there used to be a chaplain in every great family, which we do not find now." JOHNSON. "Neither do you find many of the ftate fervants which great families used formerly to have. There is a change of modes in the whole department of life." Next day, October 20, he appeared, for the only time I fuppofe in his life, as a witness in a Court of Justice, being called to give evidence to the character of Mr. Baretti, who having stabbed a man in the street, was arraigned s When Mr. Foote was at Edinburgh, he thought fit to entertain a numerous Scotch company with a great deal of coarse jocularity, at the expence of Dr. Johnfon, imagining it would be acceptable. I felt this as not civil to me, but fat very patiently till he had exhausted his merriment on that fubject; and then obferved, that furely Johnfon must be allowed to have fome sterling wit, and that I had heard him say a very good thing of Mr. Foote himself. "Ah, my old friend Sam, (cried Foote,) no man says better things: do let us have it." Upon which I told the above ftory, which produced a very loud laugh from the company. But I never faw Foote fo disconcerted. He looked grave and angry, and entered into a serious refutation of the juftice of the remark. "What, Sir, (faid he,) talk thus of a man of liberal education ;-a man who for years was at the University of Oxford;-a man who has added fixteen new characters to the English drama of his country!" at 1769. at the Old Bailey for murder. Never did fuch a conftellation of genius enlighten the aweful Seffions Houfe; Mr. Burke, Mr. Garrick, Mr. Beau- Etat. 60. clerk, and Dr. Johnson: and undoubtedly their favourable teftimony had due weight with the Court and Jury. Johnson gave his evidence in a flow, deliberate, and diftinct manner, which was uncommonly impreffive. It is well known that Mr. Baretti was acquitted. On the 26th of October, we dined together at the Mitre tavern. I found fault with Foote for indulging his talent of ridicule at the expence of his visitors, which I colloquially termed making fools of his company. JOHNSON. "Why, Sir, when you go to fee Foote, you do not go to see a faint: you go to see a man who will be entertained at your house, and then bring you on a publick stage; who will entertain you at his house, for the very purpose of bringing you on a publick stage. Sir, he does not make fools of his company; they whom he expofes are fools already: he only brings them into action." Talking of trade, he obferved, "It is a mistaken notion that a vast deal of money is brought into a nation by trade. It is not fo. Commodities come from commodities; but trade produces no capital acceffion of wealth. However, though there fhould be little profit in money, there is a confiderable profit in pleasure, as it gives to one nation the productions of another; as we have wines and fruits, and many other foreign articles, brought to us." BOSWELL. "Yes, Sir, and there is a profit in pleasure, by its furnishing occupation to fuch numbers of mankind." JOHNSON. "Why, Sir, you cannot call that pleasure to which all are averse, and which none begin but with the hope of leaving off; a thing which men dislike before they have tried it, and when they have tried it." BOSWELL. " But, Sir, the mind must be employed, and we grow weary when idle." JOHNSON. "That is, Sir, because, others being bufy, we want company; but if we were all idle, there would be no growing weary; we should all entertain one another. There is, indeed, this in trade-it gives men an opportunity of improving their fituation. If there were no trade, many who are poor would always remain poor. But no man loves labour for itself." BOSWELL. "Yes, Sir, I know a perfon who does. He is a very laborious Judge, and he loves the labour." JOHNSON. “Sir, that is because he loves respect and distinction. Could he have them without labour, he would like it lefs." "He tells me he likes it for itfelf.""Why, Sir, he fancies fo, because he is not accustomed to abstract." We went home to his house to tea. Mrs. Williams made it with fufficient dexterity, notwithstanding her blindness, though her manner of fatisfying Tt 2 herfelf 1769. herself that the cups were full enough, was a little aukward: fhe put her Etat, 60, finger down a certain way, till fhe felt the tea touch it. In my firft elation at being allowed the privilege of attending Dr. Johnfon at his late vifits to this lady, which was like being è fecretioribus confiliis, I willingly drank cup after cup, as if it had been the Heliconian fpring. But as the charm of novelty went off, I grew more faftidious; and befides, I difcovered that she was of a peevifh temper. There was a pretty large circle this evening. Dr. Johnson was in very good humour, lively, and ready to talk upon all fubjects. Mr. Ferguffon, the selftaught philofopher, told him of a new-invented machine which went without horses: a man who fat in it turned a handle, which worked a spring that drove it forward. Then, Sir, (faid Johnfon,) what is gained is, the man has his choice whether he will move himself alone, or himself and the machine too.” Dominicetti being mentioned, he would not allow him any merit. "There is nothing in all this boasted system. No, Sir; medicated baths can be no better than warm water: their only effect can be that of tepid moisture." One of the company took the other fide, maintaining that medicines of various forts, and fome too of moft powerful effect, are introduced into the human frame by the medium of the pores; and, therefore, when warm water is impregnated with falutiferous fubftances, it may produce great effects as a bath. This appeared to me very fatisfactory. Johnfon did not answer it; but talking for victory, and determined to be master of the field, he had recourse to the device which Goldsmith imputed to him in the witty words of one of Cibber's comedies: "There is no arguing with Johnson; for when his pistol misses fire, he knocks you down with the butt end of it.". He turned to the gentleman, "Well, Sir, go to Dominicetti, and get thyfelf fumigated; but be fure that the fteam be directed to thy head, for that is the peccant part."' This produced a triumphant roar of laughter from the motley affembly of philofophers, printers, and dependents, male and female. I know not how fo whimsical a thought came into my mind, but I afked, "If, Sir, you were shut up in a caftle, and a new-born child with you, what would you do?" JOHNSON. "Why, Sir, I fhould not much like my company." BOSWELL. "But would you take the trouble of rearing it?" He seemed, as may well be fuppofed, unwilling to purfue the fubject; but upon my perfevering in my question, replied, "Why yes, Sir, I would; but I must have all conveniencies. If I had no garden, I would make a fhed on the roof, and take it there for fresh air. I fhould feed it, and wash it much, and with warm water to please it, not with cold water to give it pain." BOSWELL, “Buż, 1769. Sir, does not heat relax?" JOHNSON. "Sir, you are not to imagine the BOSWELL. "Do you think, Sir, that what is called natural affection is born with us? It seems to me to be the effect of habit, or of gratitude for kindnefs. No child has it for a parent whom it has not feen." JOHNSON. "Why, Sir, I think there is an inftinctive natural affection in parents towards their children." Ruffia being mentioned as likely to become a great empire, by the rapid Why, Sir, I fee no profpect of their increase of population;-JOHNSON. propagating more. They can have no more children than they can get. I know of no way to make them breed more than they do. It is not from reapoor; fon and prudence that people marry, but from inclination. A man is he thinks, I cannot be worfe, and fo I'll e'en take Peggy." BoSWELL. "But have not nations been more populous at one period than another?" JOHNSON. "Yes, Sir; but that has been owing to the people being lefs thinned at one period than another, whether by emigrations, war, or peftilence, not by their being more or lefs prolifick. Births at all times bear the fame proportion to the fame number of people." BOSWELL. "But, to confider the state of our own country;-does not throwing a number of farms into one hand hurt population?" JOHNSON. "Why no, Sir; the fame quantity of food being produced, will be confumed by the fame number of mouths, though the We fee, if corn be dear, people may be difpofed of in different ways. and butchers' meat cheap, the farmers all apply themfelves to the raising of corn, till it becomes plentiful and cheap, and then butchers' meat becomes dear; fo that an equality is always preferved. No, Sir, let fanciful men do as they |