Coin their fresh tales, and live upon the lie; Like bees for honey, forth for news they spring,Industrious creatures! ever on the wing; Home to their several cells they bear the store, [From Law.] SLY LAWYERS. Lo! that small office! there th' incautious guest Goes blindfold in, and that maintains the rest; There in his web, th' observant spider lies, flies; And peers about for fat, intruding Culled of all kinds, then roam abroad Doubtful at first, he hears the distant for more. [From Physic.] QUACKS. TINCTURE or syrup, lotion, drop, or pill, All tempt the sick to trust the lying bill; And twenty names of cobblers turned to squires, Aid the bold language of these blushless liars. There are among them those who cannot read, And yet they'll buy a patent, and succeed; Will dare to promise dying sufferers aid, IN silent ease, at least in silence, dine, For who, when dead, can threaten or Nor one opinion start of food or wine: upbraid? Men snatched from graves, as they were dropping in, Their lungs coughed up, their bones pierced through their skin; Their liver all one scirrhus, and the frame Poisoned with evils which they dare not name; Men who spent all upon physicians' fees, Thou know'st that all the science thou canst boast, Is of thy father's simple boiled and roast, Nor always these; he sometimes saved his cash, By interlinear days of frugal hash: Wine hadst thou seldom; wilt thou be so vain As to decide on claret or champagne ? Dost thou from me derive this taste sublime, Who order port the dozen at a time? When (every glass held precious in our eyes) We judged the value by the bottle's size: [sume, Then never merit for thy praise asAre now as roaches sound, and all as Its worth well knows each servant in Who never slept, nor had a moment's ease, No, Tom, you may banter as much as you please; And I'd better jest let 'em alone, do you see? But you would n't have thought it; that girl never keered The snap of a pea-pod for Jim's bushy beard. Well, here's how it was. I was takin' some berries Across near her garden to leave at Aunt Mary's; When, jest as I come to the old ellum-tree, All alone in the shade, that June mornin', was she- I swan, she was handsomer 'n ever I seen, Well, there wasn't no use; so, says I, I'll jest linger But she heard me a movin', and looked a bit frightened, For she sot with a monstrous big dish full of peas Then I looked in her eyes, but she only looked down With a blush she tried to chase off with a frown. "Then it's somebody else you like better," says I. "No, it ain't though," says she; and I thought she would cry. Then I tried to say somethin'; it stuck in my throat, And all my idees were upset and afloat. But I said I knew somebody 'd loved her so long Though he never had told her—with feelin's so strong He was ready to die at her feet, if she chosed, If she only could love him!-I hardly supposed That she cared for him much, though. And so Tom,-and so,For I thought that I saw how the matter would go, With my heart all a jumpin' with rapture, I found I had taken her hand, and my arm was around Her waist ere I knew it, and she with her head I tell you the world was a new world to me. I can talk of these things like a book now, you see. You may tease me now, Tom, just as much as you please. the dispute OF THE SEVEN DAYS. ONCE on a time the days of the week Quarrelled and made bad weather. The point was which of the seven was best; So they all disputed together. And Monday said, "I wash the clothes"; And Tuesday said, "I air 'em"; And Wednesday said, "I iron the shirts"; And Thursday said, "I wear 'em." And Friday, "I'm the day for fish"; And Saturday, "Children love me"; And Sunday, "I am the Sabbath day, I'm sure there are none above me." "You. Sunday, sir, with your starched cravat, Tell me the cause of this angry spat; Black coat, and church-veneering: Speak loud, I am hard of hearing. "You are the foremost talker here; Then Sunday said, "Good Father The case is clear as noonday; For ever since the world was made, The Lord's day has been Sunday. Here Monday "The church 99 started up: "The folks are glad when you leave 'em; One said, "I am the fittest for They all want me to give 'em work, work"; And one," I am fittest for leisure." Another, "I'm best for prayer and praise"; Jure." And another, "I'm best for pleas Arguing thus, they flapped their wings, And puffed up every feather; They blew and rained and snowed and hailed: There never was seen such weather. Old Father Time was passing by, wrong; It's well I was up so early. And the pleasures of which you bereave 'em." But Father Tempus cut them short: "My children, why this pother? "These children of mine have lost There is no best, there is no worst; their wits And seem to be all non compos. I never knew them to gabble thus. "I should think you a flock of angry geese, One day's just like another. "To God's great eye all shine alike That day is best whose deeds are best, To hear your screaming and bawl-"Where Justice lights the passing AUSTIN DOBSON. MORE POETS YET! MORE poets yet!" - I hear him say, "Despite my skill and swashing blow,' I killed a host but yesterday!" Slash on, O Hercules! You may; Your task's at best a Hydra-fray; And though you cut, not less will grow Too arrogant! For who shall stay |