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Sir F. Well, well, make haste then
[Moody goes out and returns. Moody. Odds flesh! here's master Monly come to wait upo' your worship!
Sir F. Wheere is he?
Man. I heard you were come, sir Francis-and-
Man. I wish you may think it so, consin! for, I confess, I should have been better pleased to have seen you in any other place.
Sir F. How soa, sir?
Man. Nay, 'tis for your own sake; I'm not concerned.
Sir F. Look you, cousin; tho'f I know you wish me well, yet I don't question I shall give you such weighty reasons for what I have done, that you will say, sir, this is the wisest journey that ever I made in
Man. I think it ought to be, cousin; for I believe you will find it the most expensive one-your election did not cost you a trifle, I suppose.
Sir F. Why, ay! it's true! That-that did lick a little; but if a man's wise (and I han't fawnd yet that I'm a fool), there are ways, cousin, to lick one's self whole again.
Man. Nay, if you have that secretSir F. Don't you be fearful, cousin-you'll find that I know something.
Man. If it be any thing for your good, I should be glad to know it too.
Sir F. In short then, I have a friend in a corner, that has let me a little into what's what at Westminsterthat's one thing.
Man. Very well! but what good is tbat to do you?
Sir F. Why not me, as much as it does other folks?
Man. Other people, I doubt, have the advantage of different qualifications.
Sir F. Why, ay! there's it naw! you'll say that I have lived all my days i'the country--what then?-I'm o'the quorum- I have been at sessions, and I have made speeches there! ay, and at vestry too—and, mayhap, they may find here that I have brought my tongue up to town with me! D'ye take me naw?
Man. If I take your case right, cousin, I am afraid the first occasion you will have for your eloquence here, will he, to show whether you have any right to make use of it at all.
Sir F. How d'ye mean?
Mun. That sir John Worthland has lodged a petition against you.
Sir F. Petition ! why, ay! there let it lie-we'll find a way to deal with that, I warrant you!--Why you forgel, cousin, sir John's o’lhe wrung side, mon!
Man. I doubt, sir Francis, that will do you but little service; for, in cases very notorious, which I take yours to be, there is such a thing as a short day, and dispatching them immediately.
Sir F. With all my heart! the sooner I send him home again the better.
Man. And this is the scheme you have laid down to repair your fortune?
Sir F. In one word, cousin, I think it my duty. The Wrongheads have been a considerable family ever since England was England : and since the world knows I have talents wherewithal, they shan't say it's my fault, if I don't make as good a figure as any that ever were at the head on't.
Man. Nay, this project, as you have laid it, will come up to any thing your ancestors have done these five hundred years.
Sir F. And let me alone to work it: mayhap I hav'n't told you all, neither
Man. You astonish me! what, and is it full as practicable as what you have told me?
well grown up
Sir F. Ay, tho'f I say it-every whit, cousin. You'll find that I have more irons i'the fire than one; I doan't come of a fool's errand!
Man. Very well.
Sir F. In a word, my wife has got a friend at court as well as myself, and her dowghter Jenny is naw pretty
Man. And what, in the devil's name, would he do with the dowdy?
(Aside. Sir F. Naw, if I doan't lay in for a husband for her, mayhap, i'this tawn, she may be looking out for lerselt
Man. Not unlikely.
Sir F. Therefore I have some thoughts of getting her to be inaid of honour.
Man. Oh, he has taken my breath away! but I must hear him out. [Aside] Pray, sir Francis, do you think her education has yet qualified her for a coart.
Sir F. Why, the girl is a little too mettlesome, it's true; but she has tongue enough: she woan't be dash'd ! Then she shall learn to dance forthwith, and that will soon teach her how to stond still, you know.
Man. Very well, but when she is thus accomplished, you must still wait for a vacancy.
Sir F. Why I hope one has a good chance for that every day, cousin ; for if I take it right, that's a post that folks are not more willing to get into than they are to get out of— It's like an orange-tree upon that accawnt it will bear blossoms, and fruit that's ready to drop, at the same time.
Man. Well, sir, you best know how to make good your pretensions. But pray where is my lady and my young cousin? I should be glad to see them too.
Sir F. She is but just taking a dish of tea with the count and my landlady-I'll call her dawn.
Man. No, no; if she's engaged, I shall call again.
Sir F. Odds heart! but you mun see her vaw, cousin : what! the best friend I have in the world !
-Here, | sweetheart! (To a Servant without] prythee desire the lady and the gentleman to come down a bit; tell her "here's cousin Manly come to wait upon her.
Man. Pray, sir, who may the gentleman be?
Sir F. You mun know him to be sore; why, it's count Basset.
Man. Oh, is it he!-Your family will be infinitely happy in his acquaintance.
Sir F. Troth, I think so too: he's the civilest man that ever I knew in my life-Wliy, here he would go out of his own lodgings, al an hour's warning, purely to oblige my family. Wasn't that kind naw?
Man. Extremely civil — The family is in admirable hands already.
[Aside. Sir F. Then my lady likes him hugely—all the time of York races she would never be without him.
Man. That was happy indeed! and a prudent man, you know, should always take care that his wife may have innocent
company. Sir F. Why, ay! that's it! and I think there could not be such another!
Man. Why truly, for her purpose, I think not.
Sir F. Only naw and tan, he--he stonds a leetle too much upon ceremony; that's his fault.
Man. Oh, never fear! he'll mend that every dayMercy on us! what a head he has !
[Aside. Sir F. So here they come. Enter LADY WRONCHEAD and Count Basset.
Lady W. Cousin Manly, this is infinitely obliging; I am extremely glad to see you.
Man. Your most obedient servant, madam; I am glad to see your ladyship look so well after your journey.
Lady W. Why really coming to London is apt to put a little more life in one's looks.
Man. Yet the way of living here is very apt to deaden the complexion--and give me leave to tell you, as a friend, madam, you are come to the worst place in the world for a good woman to grow better in.
Lady W. Lord, cousin, how should people ever make any figure in life, that are always moped up in the country
Count B. Yoar ladyslip certainly takes the thing in
a quite right light, madam. Mr. Manly, your humble servant-a hem.
Man. Familiar puppy! [Aside] Sir, your most obedient-I must be civil to the rascal, to cover my suspicion of him.
[Aside. Count B. Was you al Wbite's this morning, sir? Man. Yes, sir, I just called in. Count B. Pray
-what- -was there any thing done there?
Man. Much as usual, sir; the same daily carcasses, and the same crows about them.
Count B. The Demoivre baronet bad a bloody tumble yesterday,
Man. I hope, sir, you had your share of him.
-I think I just made a couple of bels with him, took up a cool hundred, and so went to the King's
Lady W. What a genteel easy manner he has !
[Aside. Man. A very hopeful acquaintance I have made here.
[Aside. Enter SQUIRE RICHARD, with a wet brown Paper on
his' Face. Sir F. How naw, Dick; wbat's the matter with thy forehead, lad?
Squire R. I ha' gotten a knock upon't.
Lady W. And bow did you come by it, you heedless creature?
Squire R. Why, I was but running after sister, and l'other young woman, into a little room just naw: and so with that they slapped the door full in my face, and gave me such a whurr here-I thought they had beaten my brains out; so I gut a dab of whet brown paper here to swage it awhile.
Lady W. They served you right enough; will you never have done with your horse play?
Sir F. Pooh, never heed it, lad; it will be well by to-morrow the boy has a strong head.