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Fag. Ob, no, sir

r-no-no-not a syllable, upon my veracity!--He was, indeed, a little inquisitive; bat I was sly, sir-devilish sly!—My master (said 1) bonest Thomas (you know, sir, one says bonest to one's inferiors) is come to Batb to recruit-yes, sir-I said to recruit-and whether for men, money, or constitution, you know, sir, is nothing to bim, por any one else.

Capt. Abs. Well-recruit will do let it be so

Fag. Ob, sir, recruit will do surprisingly;-indeed, to give the thing an air, I told Tbomas, that your honour had already enlisted five disbanded obairmen, seven minority waiters, and thirteen billiard markers.

Capt. Abs. You blockhead, never say more tban is necessary.

Fag. I beg pardon, sir-I beg pardon.-Bot, with submission, a lie is nothing unless one supports it.Sir, whenever I draw on my invention for a good car. rent lie, I always forge endorsements as well as the bill.

Capt. Abs. Well, take care you don't hurt yoar credit by offering too mucb secarity. Is Mr. Faulkland returned?

Fag. He is above, sir, changing his dress.

Capt. Abs. Can you tell whether he has been informed of sir Anthony's and miss Melville's arrival ?

Fag. I fupcy not, sir; be bas seen no one since le came in, but his gentleman, who was with bin at Bristol.--I tbink, sir, I hear Mr. Faulkland coming down

Capt. Abs. Go, tell him I am here.

Fag. Yes, sir-[Going] I beg pardon, sir, but should sir Anthony call, yon will do me the favour to remember that we are recruiling, if you please.

Capt. Abs. Well, well.

Fag. And in tenderness to my character, if your bonoor could bring in the cbairmen and waiters, I shall esteem it as an obligation ;-for though I never scruple a lie to serve my master, yet it barts one's conscience to be found out.


Capt. Abs. Now for my whimsical friend :-If he does not know that bis mistress is bere, I'll tease bim a little before I tell bim

Enter Fag.
Fag. Mr. Faulkland, sir.

Capt. Abs.. Faulkland, you're welcome to Bath
again : yoo are punctual in your return.

Faulk. Yes; I bad nothing to detain me when I bad finished the business I went on. Well, what news since I left you ? How stand matters between you and Lydia?

Capt. Abs. 'Faith, much as they were.

Faulk. Nay, then, yon trifle too long-if you are sure of ber, propose to the aunt, in yoar own charao. ter, and write to sir Anthony for lis consent.

Capt. Abs. Softly, softly, for though I am convinced my little Lydia would elope with me as ensign Beverley, yet am I by no means certain that she would take me with the impediment of oar friends' consent, a regular hamdrum weddiog, and the reversion of a good fortune on my side. Well, but Faulk. land, you'll dine with us to-day at the hotel?

Faulk. Iudeed, I cannot; I am not in spirits to be of sucb a party.

Capt. Abs. By heavens! I sball forswear your company. You are the most teasing, captious, incorrigible lover!- Do love like a man.

Faulk. Ah! Jack, yoаr heart and soul are not, like mine, fixed immutably on one only object. You throw for a large stake, but, losing you could stake and lbrow again ;--but I bare set my sain of Lappiness on this cast, and not to succeed were to be stripped of all.

Capt. Abs. But, for heaven's sake! wbat grounds for apprebension can your wbimsical brain conjure up at present?

Faulk. What grounds for apprehension, did you

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say? Heavens! are there not a thousand ? I fear for her spirits-her health-her life--0! Jack, wben delicate and feeling sools are separated, there is not a feature in the sky, not a movement of the elements, not an aspiration of the breeze, bat bints some cause for a lover's apprehension !

Capt. Abs. Ay, but we may choose wbether we will take the bint or not.--Su then, Faulkland, if you were convinced that Julia were well, and in spirits, you would be entirely content ?

Faulk. I should be bappy beyond measureanxious only for that.

Capt. Abs. Tben cure your anxiety at ooce-Miss Melvillo is in perfect health, and is at this moment in Batb.

Faulk.. Nay, Jack-don't trifle with me.

Capt. Abs. She is arrived here with my father, within this hour.

Faulk. Can you be serious ??

Capt. Abs. I thought you koew sir Anthony better than to be surprised at a sadden whim of this kiad. Seriously then, it is as I tell you—apon my bonour.

Faulk. My dear Jack—now nothing on earth can give me a moment's aneasiness.

Enter Fag.
Fag.. Sir, Mr. Acres, just arrived, is below.

Capt. Abs. Stay, Faulkland, this Acres lives within a milo of sir Anthony, and be shall tell you how your mistress bas beeu ever since you left ber.-Fag, show the gentleman up:

[Exit Fag. Faulk. Wbat, is be much acquainted in the family?

Cupt. Abs. Oh, very intimate : He is likewise a rival of mine that is, of my other self's, for be does not tbiok bis friend, captain Absolute, ever saw the lady in question ;-and it is ridiculous enough to hear him complain to me of one Beverley, a concealed, skulking rival, wbo

Faulk. Hasb! He's here!


Enter ACRES. Acres. Hah! my dear friend, noble captain, and bonest Jack, how dost thou ? just arrived, 'faith, as you see.Sir, your bumble servanl, Warto work on ibe roads, Jack-odds whips and wheels! I've travelled like a comet, with a tail of dust all the way as long as the Mall.

Capt. Abs. Ah! Bob, you are indeed an eccentric planet; but we know your attraction bithermgive me leave to introduce Mr. Faulkland to you; Mr. Fauikland, Mr. Acres.

Acres. Sir, I am most beartily glad to see you: sir, I solicit your connexions.--Hey, Jack-what, this is Mr. Faulkland, who

Capt. Abs. Ay, Boh, miss Melville's Mr. Faulkland.

Acres. Ah! Mr. Faulkland, you are indeed a bappy man!

Faulk. I bave not seen miss Melville yet, sir,-I hope she enjoyed full bealth and spirits in Devonsbire ?

Acres. Never knew her better in my life, sir-never betler.-Odils blushes and blooms! she has been as bealthy as the German spa.

Faulk. Iudeed! I did hear that she had been a Jittle indisposed.

Acres. False, false, sir-only said to vex goa: quite the reverse, I assure you.

Faulk. There, Jack, you see sbe bas tbe advantage of me; I bad almost fretted myself ill.

Capt. Abs. Now are you angry with your njistress for not baviog been sick!

Faulk. No, no, you misunderstand me :-yet surely a little trilling indisposition is not an unnatural consequence of absence from those we love.--Now confess -isn't there something unkind in tbis violent, robust, unfeeling healll'

Capt. Abs. Ob, it was very unkind of ber lo be well in your absenoe, to be sure!

Acres. Good apartments, Jack.

Faulk. Well, sir, but you was saying that miss Melville bas been so exceedingly well-what, then, she has been merry and gay, I suppose ?-always in spirits, bey?

Acres. Merry! odds crickets ! she bas been the bell and spirit of tbe company wherever she bas been—90 lively and entertaining ! so fall of wit and humour !

Faulk. By my soul! there is an innate levity in woman that nothing can overcome!—Wbat! bappy, and I away!

Capt. Abs. Just now, you were only apprehensive for your mistress' spirits.

Faulk. Why, Jack, have I been the joy and spirit of the company?

Capt. Abs. No, indeed, you bave not.
Faulk. Have I been lively and entertaining?
Capt. Abs. 05, npon my word, I acquit you.
Faulk. Have I been fall of wit and bamoor?

Capt. Abs. No, 'faith, to do you justice, you bave been confoundedly stupid, indeed.

Acres. What's the maller with the gentleman ?

Capt. Abs. He is only expressing his great satisfaction at hearing that Jolia bas been so well and Lappy -hat's all-hey, Faulkland ?

Fauik. Yes, yes, she has a lappy disposition!

Acres. That she has, indeed—then she is so accomplished-so sweet a voice--so expert at her harpsichord—such a mistress of fat and sharp, squallanie, rumblante, and quiverante!--there was this time month-odds minnums and crotchets ! how sbe did chirrup at Mrs. Piano's concert! [Sings] My heart's my own, my will is free. That's very like her.

Faulk. Fool! fool that I am! to fix all my bappiness on such a trifer! 'Sdeatb! 10 make berself the pipe and ballad-monger of a cirole! to soothe ber light heart with calches and glees!-What can you say to this, sir?

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