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Capt. Abs. Why, that I should be glad to bear my mistress bad been so merry, sir.

Fuulk. Nay, nay, naj I'm not sorry that she bas been uappy-10, no, I am glad of thal—but she has been dancing too, I doubt not?

Acres. Wbat does the gentleman say about dancing ?

Capt. Abs. He says the lady we speak of dauces as well as she sings.

Acres. Ay, Truly does she-there was at our last race ball

Faulk. Hell and the devil! There! there told yoa so! I told you so! oh! she thrives in my absence!— Dancing!

Capt. Abs. For heaven's sake, Faulkland, don't expose yourself so !-Suppose she lias danced, wbat then? -does not the ceremony of society osteu oblige

Faulk. Well, well, I'll oontain myself-perbaps, as you say—for form sake. – I say, Mr.-Mr.- Whut's his d-d name?

Capt. Abs. Acres, Acres. Faulk. O ay, Mr. Acres, you were praising miss Melville's manner of dancing a minuet—hey ?

Acres. Oh, I dare josure her for that but wbat I was going to speak of, was ber country dancing : odds swimmings! sbe las such an air with her!

Faulk. Now, disappointment ou her! defend this, Absolute! why don't you defend this? -country dances ! jigs and reels ! am I to blame now? A ninget I could have forgiven-I should not have minded that -I say, I should not base regarded a minael-but country dances ! Z-ds! had she made one in a cotillion—I believe I could have forgiven even that but to be monkey-led for a uight!-to run the gauntlot through a string of amorous palming puppies ! to show paces, like a managed Giliy !--Oh, Jauk, tbere never can be but one man in the world whom a truly modest and delicate woman ought to pair with iu a country dance; nd, even then, the rest of the couples

should be her great uncles and aunts !

Capt. Abs. Ay, to be sure! grandfathers and grandmothers!

Faulk. If there be bui one vicious enind in the set, it will sprend like a contagion-the action of their pulse beats to the lascivious movement of the jigtheir quivering, warm- breathed sigbs impregnate the air-the atmosphere becomes electrical to love, and each amorous spark daris through every link of the chain! I must leave you I own I am somewhat Qar. ried and that confounded looby bas perceived it.

[Going. Capt. Abs. Nay, but stay, Faulkland, and thank dir. Acres for his good news. Faulk. D-n his news!

(Exit. Capt. Abs. Ha! ha! ha! poor Faulkland ! Fire minutes since-nothing ou earth could give him a woment's uneasiness!'

Acres. The gentleman wasn't angry at my praising liis mistress, was be?

Capt. Abs. A little jealous, I believo, Bob.

Acres. You don't say so? Ha! la! jealous of me! that's a good joke!

Capt. Abs. There's nothing strange in that, Bob; let me tell you, that sprightly grace and insinuating manner of yours will do some mischief among the girls here.

Acres. Ah! yon joko-ba! ha! mischief-a! ha! but you know I am not my own property! my dear Lydia bas forestalled me.-She could never abide me in the country, because J nsed to dress so badly—but, odds frogs and tambours! I sban't take matters so here-now ancient madam bas no voice in it-I'll make my old clothes know who's master-I shall straightway cashier the huuting-frock, and render my leather breeches incapable-My bair bas been in training some time.

Capt. Abs. Indeed !

Acres. Ay—and thoff the side curls are a little restive, my bind part takes it very kindly.

Capt. Abs. Oh, you'll polish, I doubt not.

Acres. Absolutely I propose so-lhen, if I can find out this ensign Beverlev, odds triggers and fints! I'll make him know the difference o't.

Capt. Abs. Spoke like a man—bat pray, Bob, I observe you have got an odd kind of a new method of swearing

· Acres, Ha! ha! you've taken notice of it—'tis genteel, isn't it?- I didn't invent it myself though; but a commander in our militia,' a great scholar, I assure you; says that there is no meaning in the common oaths, and that nothing but their antiquity makes them respectable; because, he says, the ancients would never stick to an oath or two, bat would say, by Jove! or by Bacchus! or by Mars! or by Venas! or by Pallas! according to the sentiment;—so that to swear with propriety, says my little major, the • oath should be an echo to the sense ;' and this'we call the oath referential, or sentimental swearingha! ha! ha! 'tis genteel, isn't it!

Capt. Abs. Very genteel, and very new indeed and I dare say will supplant all other figures of imprecation.

Acres. Ay, ay, the best terms will grow obsoleteDammes have had tbeir day.

Enter Fag. Fag. Sir, there is a gentleman below desires to see you-Shall I show him into the parlour.

Capt. Abs. Ay-you may.
Acres. Well, I must be gone-
Capt. Abs. Stay; who is it, Fag?
Fag. Your father, sir.

Capt. Abs. You poppy, why didn't you shew him up directly?

[Exit Fag. Acres. You have basiness with sir Anthony – expect a message from Mrs. Malaprop at my lodgingx. I have sent also to my dear friend, sir Lucius O'Trigger. --Adieu, Jaok, we must meet at nigbt, when you shall give me a dozen bampers to little Lydia..

Capt. Abs. That I will, with all my heart. [Exit Acres.) Now for the parental lecture-I hope he bas beard nothing of the business that bas brought me here--I wish the gout had held him fast in Devonsbire, with all my soal !

Enter SIR ANTHONY. Sir, I am delighted to see you bere, and looking so well!yoor sudden arrival at Bath made me apprebensive for your bealth.

Sir Anth. Very apprebensive, I dare say, Jack. What, you are recruiting here, bey?

Capt. Abs. Yes, sir, I am on duty.

Sir Anth. Well, Jack, I am glad to see you, though I did not expect it; for I was going to write to you on a little matter of business.Jack, I have been considering that I grow old and infirm, and shall probably not trouble you long.

Capt. Abs. Pardon me, sir, I never saw you look more strong and bearty, and I pray fervently that you may continue so.

Sir Anth. I bope your prayers may he heard, with all my beart. Well then, Jack, I have been considering ibat I am so strong and bearty, I inay continue to plague you a long time.--Now, Jack, I am sensible that the income of your commission, and what I have hitherto allowed you, is but a small pittance for a lad of your spirit.

Capt. Abs. Sir, you are very good.

Sir Anth. And it is my wish, while I yet live, to have my boy make some figare in the world.--I have resolved, therefore, to fix you at once in a noble independence.

Capt. Abs. Sir, yoor kindness overpowors me.Yet, sir, I presume you would not wish me to quit

the army?

Sir Anth. Ob! that shall be as your wife chooses. Capt. Abs. My wife, sir !

Sir Anth. Ay, ay, settle that between you settle tbat between you.,

Capt. Abs. A wife, sir, did you say ?

Sir Anth. Ay, a wife-aliy, did not I mention ber before ?

Capt. Abs. Not a word of hor, sir.

Sir Anth. Odd so!-I must n't forget ber though. -Yes, Jack, the independence I was talking of is by a marriage the fortune is saddled with a wife-bat I suppose that makes no difference?

Capt. Abs. Sir! sir! you amaze me !

Sir Anth. Why, wbat ibe devil's the matter with tbe fool ? Just now you were all gratitude and daty.

Capt. Abs. I was, sir,-you talked to me of indedependence and a fortune, but not a word of a wife.

Sir Anth. Why--wbat difference does that make? Odds life, sir! if you bave the estate, you must take it with the live stock on it, as it stands.

Capt. Abs. Pray, sir, who is the lady?

Sir Anth. What's that to you, sir ? - Come, give me yaar promise to love, and to marry her directly,

Capt. Abs. Sure, sir, this is not very reasonable, to summon my affections for a lady I know nothing of !

Sir Anth. I am sure, sir, 'tis more unreasonable in you to object to a lady you know nothing of,

Capt. Abs. You most excuse me, sir, if I tell you, once for all, tbat in this point I cannot obey you.

Sir Anth. Hark ye, Jack ;-I have heard you for some time with patience-I have been cool,-quite cool; but take care--fou know I am compliance itself-wben I am not thwarted; no one more easily led when I have my own way; but don't put me in a frenzy.

Capt. Abs. Sir, I must repeat it in this I cannot obey you.

Sir Anth. Now do me! if ever I call you Jack

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