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again while I lire!
Capt. Abs. Nay, sir, bat hear me.
Sir Anth. Sir, I won't bear a word.—196 a word ! not one word! so give me your promise by a nodand I'll tell you what, Jack-I mean, you dog—if you don't, by
Capt. Abs. What, sir, promise to link myself to some mass of ugliness ! to
Sir Anth. 2 ds! Sirrab ! the lady shall be as agly as I choose: sbe shall have a hamp on each shoulder ; she shall be as crooked as the crescent; her une eye shall roll like the ball's in Cox's Moseum -she shall have a skin like a mummy, and the beard of a Jew—sbe shall be all this, sirrah !-yet, I'll make you ogle her all day, and sit op all night, to writo sonnets on ber beauty. Capt. Abs. This is reason and moderation indeed!
Sir Anth. None of your sneering, poppy! no grin. ning, jackanapes !
Capt. Abs. Indeed, sir, I never was in a worse bumour for mirth in my life.
Sir Anth. 'Tis false, sir; I know you are laughing in your sleeve; I know you will grin when I am
Capt. Abs. Sir, I hope I know my duty better.
Sir Anth. None of your passion, sir! none of your violence, if you please-It won't do with me, I pro
Capt. Abs. Indeed, sir, I never was cooler in my life.
Sir Anth. 'Tis a confounded lie!- I know you are in a passion in your heart ; I know you are, you by. pocritical young dog—but it won't do.
Capt. Abs. Nay, sir, apon my word
Sir Anth. So you will fly out! can't you be cool, like me? What ibe devil good can passion do ?--passion is of no service, you impudent, insolent, overbearing reprobate !—There, you sneer again !don't
provoke me !—but you rely upon the mildness of my temper- you do, you dog! you play opon the meekness of my disposition! Yet take care-ibe patience of a saint may be overcome at last!-but mark! I give you six hours and a half to consider of this : if you then agree, without any condition, to do every thing on earth that I choose, why-copfound you ! I may in time forgive you-If not, 2-ds! don't enter the same hemisphere with ine! don't dare to breathe the same air, or use the samne light with me ; but get an atmosphere and a sun of your own! I'll strip you of your commission; I'll lodge a five-andthreepence in the bands of Irastees, and you shall live on tbe interest.-I'll disown you, I'll disinherit you, I'll unget you ! and d-n me! if ever I call you Jack again!
[Eait. Capt. Abs. Mild, gentle, considerale father! I kiss your bands.
Enter Fag. Fag. Assuredly, sir, your father is wrath to a degree ; be comes down stairs eight or ten steps at a time--muttering, growling, and thumping the banisters all the way ; I, and the cook's dog, stand bowing at the door-rap he gives me a stroke on the head witta bis cane ; bids me carry that to my master,tben kicking the poor tarnspit into the area, d-08 is all for a puppy triumvirate! Upon my credit, sir, were I in your place, and found my father such bad company, 1 should certainly drop his acquaintance.
Capt. Abs. Cense your impertinence, sir—did you come in for nothing more?-Stand out of the way.
[Pushes him aside, and erit.
Fag, solus. So ! Sir Anthony trims my master-be is afraid to reply to bis father, and vents his spleen on poor Fag! Wlien one is vexed by one person, to revenge one's self on another who happens to come in the way, shows the worst of tempest, the
Enter Errand Boy.
Fag. Well, yoa little dirty poppy, you needu't bawl 80—the mennesl disposition, the
Boy. Quiok ! quick, Mr. Fag.
Fug. Quick ! quick! you impudent jackanapes ! am I to be commauded by you too, you little impertinent, iusolent, kitchen-bred (Kicks him off SCENE II. The North Parade,
Enter Lucy. Lucy. So, I shall bave another rival to add to my mistress' list-captain Absolute, --however, I sball pot euter bis uame till my purse has received due notioe in form. Sir Lucius is generally more
punctoal, when be expects lo hear from his dear Delia, as be calls ber ;-I wonder he's not here.
Enter SIR LUCIUS O'TRIGGER. Sir L. Ha! my little ambassadress-upon my conscience I bave been looking for you ; I have been on ibe South Parade ibis lalf hour.
Lucy. [Speaking simply.) O gemini! and I bare been waiting for your worsbip here on tbe Norib.
Sir L. 'Faith! may be that was the reason we did not meet; and it is very comical too, bow you could go out, and I not see you for I was only taking a nap at the Parade Coffee-bouse, and I chose the wiodow, on purpose that I might sol miss you.
Lucy. My stars ! Now I'd wager a sixpence I went by wbile you were asleep.
Sir L. Sure enough it must have been so and I never dreamt it was so late, till I waked. Well, but my littlo girl, bave you got nothing for me?
Lucy. Yes, but I bave-I've got a letter for you in my poeket.
Sir L. I'faith! I guessed you weren't come emptybanded-well let me see what the dear creature says.
Lucy. There, sir Lacios. [Gives him a letter.
Sir L. (Reads] SirThere is often a sudden incentive impulse in love, that has a greater induction than years of domestic combination : such was the commotion I felt at the first superfluous view of sir Lucius O'Trigger. Very pretty opon my word ! Female punctuation forbids me to say more ; yet let me add, that it will give me joy infallible to find sir Lucius worthy the lust criterion of my affections. Yours, while meretricious.
DeLIA. Upon my conscience, Luoy, your lady is a great mis. tress of language ! 'Faith! she's quite the queen of the dictionary!
Lucy. Ay, sir, a lady of her experience.
Lucy. 0, true, sir-but then she reads 80-my stars ! bow she will read off band !
Sir L. 'Faith, she mast be very deep read, to write this way-hough she's rather an arbitrary writer, too-for here are a great many poor words pressed into the service of this note, that would get their habeas corpus from any court in Cbristendom. However, when affection guides the pen, be must be a brate who finds fault witb the style.
Lucy. Al, sir Lucius, if you were to hear how she talks of you !
Sir L. Ob, tell her, I'll make her the best husband in the world, and lady O'Trigger into the bargaio !-Bat we must get the old gentlewoman's consenland do every thing fairls.
Lucy. -Naç, sir Lucius, I thought you wan't rich enough to be so nice.
Sir L. Upon my word, young woman, you have bit it :- I am so poor, that I can't afford to do a dirty action. If I did not want money, I'd steal your mistress and her fortane with a great deal of pleabure. However, my pretty girl, [Gives her Money] bere's a little something to bay you a riband; and
meet me in the evenivg, avd I will give you an answer to this. So, hussy, take a kiss beforehand, to put you in mind.
[Kisses her. Lucy. O lad! sir Lucius—I never seed such a gemman! My lady won't like you if you are so inpudent.
Sir L. 'Faith she will, Lucy—that same-pbo! what's the name of it?-mudesty !--is a quality in a lover inore praised by the women than liked ; so, if your mistress asks you whether sir Lucias ever gave you a kiss, tell her fifty, my dear,
Lucy. What, would you bave me tell ber a lie ?
Sir L. Ab then, you baggage ! I'll make it a trath presently.
Lucy. For shame now; here is some one coming. Sir L. O'faith I'll quiel your conscience !
[Sees Fag. Erit, humming a tune.
Enter Fag. Fag. So, so, ma'am. I buinbly beg pardon. Lucy. O lud!~now, Mr. Fag--you flurry one so! Fag. Come, come, Lacy, here's no one by-s0 a little less simplicity, with a grain or two more since. rity, if you please-You play false with inadamI saw you give the barovet a letter.--My master sball know this and if we don't call hiin out-I will,
Lucy. Ha! ba! ha! you gentlemen's genlleinen are so basty !--That letter was from Mrs. Dalaprop, simpleton.-She is taken with sir Lucius' address.
Fag. How! wbat tastes some peoplo bave! Why, I suppose I have walked by her window a hundred times.—But what says our young lady ?-any message to iny master?
Lucy. Sad news, Mr. Fag! A worse rival than Acres! Sir Arithony Absolute has proposed bis son.
Fag. What, captain Absolute ?
Fag. Ha! ha! ha! very good, 'faith ! Good b'ye, Lucy, I must away with this news.