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advances of a character bold and obvious to a gentleman, and still retain a good name in society. Modesty is the only current coin of the sex; nothing can atone for its absence. A self-possessed, yet retiring manner, is at once the index, and the charm, of female worth. It may be needless to speak of the confirmed coquette. She, like the coxcomb, may expect no mercy from others; she is only fit to be despised and shunned.

Opposed to this fault, stands that of Undue Reserve. Some young ladies are so trained as apparently to enshrine themselves from all approach in the society of gentlemen. They are models of decorum, miracles of prudence, and drawn up, as if always anticipating a foe. They inwardly sneer at all sentiment, and deride those who exhibit it, and pride themselves, above all things, in keeping every one completely at

a distance.

We do not deny that a female has a right, and ought, to repel all improper liberties, and to shew those who are unduly familiar, that she can assume, at fit times, a proper dignity. But need she, in doing this, build round herself a wall of ice? Shall she, through fear of seeming forward, put on an eternal frown? The slightest compliment is interpreted as flattery, so that the speaker must do violence to his honest convictions, lest he offend an ever-suspicious maidenly pride.

The true medium between boldness and a chilling reserve may not be easily attained; yet it is worth

years of effort, to even approximate this happy manner. There are women who can invite to easy and pleasant conversation, and yet repel the most trivial impropriety. Can a lady never accept a present from a gentleman, without so doing it as to encourage his particular attentions? Does she, by consenting to walk, or ride with one, bind herself to him for life, or invite his addresses as a suitor?

But let a young woman resolve, that, while she receives the ordinary marks of courtesy with readiness, she will not allow herself to infer that they signify every thing. If the remark of Lord Bacon be correct, in general, that "women, when young, are the idols of men," the reverse of it is not seldom true. A companion for the evening is invested with imaginary dispositions, and she who ought to have exercised her judgment, and waited for decisive tokens of favour, is captivated without the least intention on the part of her fancied lover.

It is certainly desirable that a young lady be acquainted, and that somewhat particularly, with a variety of gentlemen. Thus only can she be qualified to discriminate between the undeserving, the indifferent, and the excellent. How else can you know the indications of those who undervalue your sex,-in general, the worthless, gay, and unprincipled,—and guard against their influence? There are those who delight in making sport of an inexperienced female. To understand the traits of such, you must sometime

have met with them. But be sure you never place yourself in the power of an individual of this character, or one whose principles and designs you suspect. If you doubt the purity of any one who seeks your society frequently, consult a friend older and wiser than yourself; and abide by the judgment of disinterested observers.

.

There are instances in which a young woman is brought into the society of the other sex, by her brothers. Thus situated, you ought to take special heed against those romantic ideas and premature inclinations, that spring from passion and fancy. Here, as at all times, the advice of a judicious brother, before whom those of his own sex are accustomed completely to disclose their true character, should be sought and prized. Do not permit yourself to indulge a predilection for one, against whom, as a companion for life, so near a relative and friend has warned you.

There is one class of young men against whom every young woman should be most especially upon her guard. We mean that class who may with the strictest propriety be designated "danglers," men who are perpetually fluttering around a female, keeping more worthy suitors from approaching; and yet, with all their particular attentions, never coming to a positive and binding declaration. These are more detestable, because more dangerous, than the open and declared profligate. They inflict wounds at once upon the heart of their victim, and destroy her prospects in

life, while they feed the flame of hope, and, in their case, ill-judged preference, without giving occasion for a just exhibition of proper feeling and resentment. Let the young woman who is thus situated discard the dangler at once, without compunction or remorse; he has no soul, so she need be under no apprehension for the consequence. If a gentleman, after a reasonable term of acquaintance, continues to pay particular attentions to a lady, without coming to a declaration, let her, without further question, conclude that his designs are dishonourable, and dismiss him from her presence.

166

CHAPTER XI.

FIRST Love.

Love refines

The thoughts, the heart enlarges; hath his seat
In reason, and is judicious; is the scale

By which to heavenly love thou may'st ascend.

Milton.

We use this expression, because of the importance we attach not only to the sentiment in general, but especially to its earliest development. There are those who sneer at the name of love. There are many who laugh when it is mentioned, if made in sober earnestness, and yet some of those who thus speak in public, do, in the secresy of their hearts, believe in, ay, reverence it, as one of the most sacred impulses of our Because we have witnessed, or read of, a silly sentimentalism, that affected its character, let us not straightway question the possibility of its existence in any one.

nature.

Nor would we encourage the young maiden in musing over novels, or listening to talk on this subject, until she dreams herself in love. There is indeed little danger of this, where friends have not made it a theme for perpetual inuendos and jests, but spoken frankly, simply, and seriously of it, as a reality in

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