페이지 이미지
PDF
[ocr errors]

SSun's declination S. *

u

m

s

[ocr errors][ocr errors][ocr errors][ocr errors][ocr errors][subsumed]

21

[ocr errors]

D
kiss is called tetenamequilitzle.
your APPLICATION..
only had the text.
Parishioner.-Do you mean ME, sir?"

It feels just the way it is spelt.
Humboldt gives some amusing words heard in the conversation of the native Mexican.
Parson.-Oh! my good woman, you will never make a good sermonizer; you are too soon in

Parson.-Oh! if a text is all you want, I will furnish that.
better to dwell in a corner of the house-top, than with a brawling woman in a wide house."

Parishioner.-Yes; but then you are so long about it. I could write one in half the time, if I

Parson.But it is no easy matter, my good woman, to write good sermons. amazes me ministers don't write better sermons. I'm sick of the dull, prosy affairs. DIALOGUE BETWEEN A CLERGYMAN AND ONE OF HIS FEMALE PARISHIONERS.-Parishioner-It)

Take this one from Solomon :-" It is

just the way it is spelt.

[ocr errors]

Day of Week.
Day of Month. I mam mancor- ESSES
ZEBE BOEEBEE NOZEBEECOZEBEDO

?

[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]

atentir for

ale:

mar

alonar for

[ocr errors][ocr errors][ocr errors][ocr errors]

Sun's declination South.

Wee
Day of Month. 1 w OU MO THOT

Moon's Place. | CEE home and got the skin of a bear which I had killed some time before, and having supplied myself) down in a place where hogs use, that they would never show their snouts there again. I went I heard him make the remark, that if a foot, or an ear, or even a small piece of bear-skin was thrown him several times, but could get no relief, when, being at ola Erasmus Culpepper's house one day, My crop was too small to feed my own family and John Champion's hogs, too : so I complained to overbearing man too, was not particular whether his stock broke into other people's fields or not. gang of hogs, and feeling a little above his neighbors on account of his wealth, and being rather an lowing recipe for getting rid of one's neighbor's hogs :those days. My nearest neighbor, John Champion, being better off than the rest of us, had a nice? ted a few acres in corn and cotton, besides a small potato patch, and bit of garden, as was usual in

About the year 1830, I settled at the Lower Peach Tree, in Wilcox County, Alabama, and cultiva-
CAPTAIN SMITH'S BEAR STORY.-A correspondent of the Newark Daily Advertiser gives the fol->

E
Day of Week. I ZEBÊ ROZEBÊ ROZEBENE MOZEBETE )

SOE
E E***393|XL&XOX656969cocco

&

?

[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]

II

[ocr errors]

all

[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[merged small][merged small][ocr errors][ocr errors][ocr errors][ocr errors]

one smelt: hogs stayed at home after that. fish. Waiter.-Only brought up two, I think, sir. Diner.--No, three; I had two mackerels, and) can eating house. It is a good one, happen where it might: Now, waiter, what's to pay? Waiter. -Let me see, sir; what have you had, sir? Diner.-Three)

THREE FISH FOR DINNER.-A Liverpool paper tells this story as having its origin in an Ameri) on the road, having literally run themselves to death. It is needless to add that John Champion's from his fellow sewed up in the skin, and he trying to catch the other-the rest were found dead (them was at Bassett's Creek, near forty miles from my house, only two being alive-one runnings (loose, when he ran after the rest, who flew from the supposed bear. The last that was seen of

"tolled them up," and catching a good runner, sewed him up in the bear-skin, and then turned him Swith some corn, I went out and saw about twenty fine year-olds munching away in my field. 15

[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors][subsumed][ocr errors][merged small][ocr errors][ocr errors][ocr errors][ocr errors][ocr errors][ocr errors]

No, sir-r-ree !"
wake me when I get dry !"
S “Oh! just wake me up any time; I'm always dry !"

When pride cometh, then cometh shame; but with the lowly is wisdom. and when he sits down has to stand up

"How shall I know when you get dry?" asked his mother. posited something in a rickety old cupboard, and laid himself down upon the floor, “I want you to

ALWAYS DRY.-" I say, mother,” said a regular street loafer the other night, after he had de-S it usually is heard in a mill pond. He is a warmint what ain't so bad when broiled on a griddle. every night, he does, himself. He perwides music for the million, which has been so called because

Being a lover of native melodies, he gives free concerts water, and consekwently invented the teetotal society. He always walks with a jump, he does ;

SCIENCE.-"A frog," says Professor Pump, “is an amphibious animal, as what lickers on colds

[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors][ocr errors][ocr errors][ocr errors][ocr errors][ocr errors]

', replied the cond Mr. B. abstras the prompt rejoina

[ocr errors]

D was not lighted up by gentleness and humanity.”

"Two," replied the constable. >fly up before the door, “ Mister, your sign has fallen down !" 5" how many cows do you own ?" ? “I never knew,” said Lord Erskine, "a man remarkable for heroic bravery, whose very aspect

“Why do you ask?" was the query. (would make haste and send the other along, as I have n't but one!"

A temperance man cried out to the keeper of a rum shop on seeing a drunken man's heels) "Two,” said Mr. B., with good-natured astonishment, “Well, if the law allows me two, I wish it "Because I wish to levy on them," was the prompt rejoinder. “ Well, let me see,” said Mr. B. abstractedly, "how many cows does the law allow me?" A KNOWING ONE.-“Mr. Brown,” said a constable to this ubiquitous personage the other day,

[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
« 이전계속 »