The British drama; a collection of the most esteemed tragedies, comedies, operas, and farces, in the English language

When he was rogue Wellborn, no man would believe him;

And then his information could not hurt us:
But now he is right worshipful again,
Who dares but doubt his testimony?
Tap. Undone, undone! methinks
I see thee, Froth, already in a cart,
And my hand hissing, (if I 'scape the halter,)
With the letter R printed upon it.

Froth. Would that were the worst! That were but nine days wonder: as for credit, [money We have none to lose; but we shall lose the He owes us, and his custom; there's the plague on't.

Tap. He has summon'd all his creditors by the drum,

And they swarm about him like so many soldiers [way On the pay-day; and has found out such a new To pay his old debts, as, 'tis very likely, He shall be chronicled for it.

Froth. But you are sure his worship Comes this way to my lady's?

[Cry of brave WELLBORN!

Tap. Hark! I hear him. Froth. Be ready with your petition, and present it

To his good grace.

[Drums within, cry of brave Wellborn.

Enter WELLBORN, in a rich habit, GREEDY, MARRALL, CREDITORS, &C. TAPWELL, kneeling, delivers in his bill.

Well. How's this! petition'd too?
But note what miracles the payment of
A little trash, and a rich suit of clothes,
Can work upon these rascals. I shall be,
I think, prince Wellborn.

Mar. When your worship's married,

Just. Gr. I am changed on the sudden In my opinion-Mum!

I fry like a burn'd marrowbone. [Aside.] Come nearer, rascal;

And now I view him better, did you e'er see One look so like an arch knave? his very countenance, [him, Should an understanding judge but look upon Would hang him though he were innocent. Tap. Froth. Worshipful Sir!

Just. Gr. No; though the great Turk came instead of turkeys,

To beg my favour, I am inexorable.
Thou hast an ill name; I here do damn thy
license,

Forbidding thee ever to tap or draw;
For instantly will I, in mine own person,
Command the constable to pull down thy sign,
Froth. No mercy!
Just. Gr. Vanish!

[me.

if I show any, may my promis'd venison choke Tap. Unthankful knaves are ever so re

warded.

[Exeunt TAPWELL and FROTH. Well. Speak what are you? 1st Cred. A decayed vintner, Sir, That might have thriv'd, but that your wor ship broke me

With trusting you with muscadine and eggs, And five-pound suppers, with your afterdrinkings,

When you lodg'd upon the Bankside.
Well. I remember.

1st Cred. I have not been hasty, nor e'er laid to arrest you;

And therefore, Sir

Well. Thou art an honest fellow : I'll set thee up again; see his bill paid.

What are you?

[TO MARRALL

You may be. [Aside.] I know what I hope to I gave you credit for a new suit of clothes,

Mar. To be known

Your worship's bailiff, is the mark I shoot at.
Well. And thou shalt hit it.
Mar. Pray you, Sir, despatch
These needy followers, and for my admittance
ETAPWELL and FROTH flatter and bribe
JUSTICE GREEDY.

(Provided you'll defend me from Sir Giles,
Whose service I am weary of,) I'll say some-
You shall give thanks for.
[thing
Well. Fear him not.
Just. Gr. Who, Tapwell? I do remember
thy wife brought me,

Last new year's tide, a couple of fat turkeys.
Tup. And shall do every Christmas, let your
But stand my friend now.
[worship

Just. Gr. How! with Mr. Wellborn?
I can do any thing with him, on such terms-
See you this honest couple? they are good souls
As ever drew out spigot; have they not
A pair of honest faces?

Well. I o'erheard you,

And the bribe he promis'd; you are cozen'd

in 'em ;

[riots, For, of all the scum that grew rich by my This for a most unthankful knave, and this For a base woman, have the worst deserv'd; And therefore speak not for them. By your place, [ear, You are rather to do me justice; lend me your Forget his turkeys, and call in his license, And every season I will send you venison' To feast a mayor and corporation.

2d Cred. A tailor once, but now mere botcher. Which was all my stock; but, you failing in payment,

[fin'd

I was remov'd from the shop-board, and conUnder a stall.

Well. See him paid; and botch no more. 2d Cred. I ask no interest, Sir.

Well. Such tailors need not.

If their bills are paid in one and twenty years, They are seldom losers-See these men discharg'd;

And, since old debts are clear'd by a new way,
A little bounty will not misbecome me;
There's something for you all,
[Throws them a purse.

And I am able to spare it.
All the Cred. Brave Mr. Wellborn!
[Exeunt CREDITORS.

Well. Pray you, on before; I'll attend you at dinner.

Just. Gr. For Heaven's sake, don't stay It is almost ready. [long;

[Exeunt all but WELLBORN and MARRALL. Well. Now, Mr. Marrall, what's the weighty You promis'd to impart?

[secret

Mar. Sir, time nor place Allow me to relate each circumstance: This only in a word; I know Sir Giles Will come upon you for security For his thousand pounds; which you must not

consent to.

As he grows in heat, (as I am sure he will,) Be you but rough, and say he's in your debt Ten times the sum, upon sale of your land: I had a hand in't (I speak it to my shame) When you were cozen'd of it.

Well. That's forgiven.

Mar. I shall deserve it then; urge him to
produce

The deed in which you pass'd it over to him,
Which I know he'll have ready to deliver
To the Lord Lovell. I'll instruct you further,
As I wait on your worship; if I play not
my part
[vexation,
To your full content, and your uncle's much
Hang up Jack Marrall.

Well. I rely upon thee.

[Exeunt. SCENE III-A Room in SIR GILES OVERREACH'S House.

ALLWORTH and MARGARET (with a Letter in
her hand) enter.

Allw. Whether to yield the first praise to my
lord's
[sweetness,

Unequall'd temperance,
I yet rest doubtful.

or your constant

Marg. Give it to Lord Lovell;

For what in him was bounty, in me is duty.
I make but payment of a debt, to which
My vows, in that high office register'd,
Are faithful witnesses.

Allw. "Tis true, my dearest;

Yet when I call to mind how many fair ones
Make wilful shipwreck of their faiths and oaths
To God and man, to fill the arms of greatness;
And you, with matchless virtue, thus to hold
Against the stern authority of a father, [out
And spurn at honour when it comes to court

you;

I am so tender of your good, that I can hardly
Wish myself that right you are pleas'd to do me.
Marg. To me what's title, when content is
Or wealth, when the heart pines, [wanting?
In being dispossess'd of what it longs for?
Or the smooth brow

Of a pleas'd sire, that slaves me to his will?
And, so his vain ambition may be feasted
By my obedience, and he see me great,
Leaves to my soul nor faculties nor power
To make her own election.

Allw. But the dangers
That follow the repulse.

Marg. To me they are nothing:

Let Allworth love, I cannot be unhappy.
Suppose the worst, that in his rage he kill me,
A tear or two by you dropp'd on my hearse,
In sorrow for my fate, will call back life
So far as but to say, that I die yours;
I then shall rest in peace.

Allw. Heaven avert

Such trials of your true affection to me!
Nor will it unto you, that are all mercy,
Show so much rigour. But since we must run
Such desperate hazards, let us do our best
To steer between 'em.

Marg. Lord Lovell is your friend;
And, though but a young actor, second me
In doing to the life what he has plotted.

Enter SIR GILES OVERREACH.

'Till death unloose it; is a confidence
In his lordship that will deceive him.
Allw. I hope better, good lady.
Murg. Hope, Sir, what you please; for me,
I must take a safe and secure course. I have
A father, and without his full consent,
Though all the lords i'the land kneel'd for my
I can grant nothing.
[favour,
Sir G. I like this obedience.
[be
But whatsoever my lord writes must and shall
Accepted and embrac'd. [Aside.]-Sweet Mr.
Allworth,
You show yourself a true and faithful servant
To your good lord; he has a jewel of you.
How! frowning, Meg? are these looks to re-
ceive

A messenger from my lord? What's this? give
me it.

Marg. A piece of arrogant paper, like th' inscriptions.

SIR GILES reads the letter.

Fair Mistress, from your servant learn, all
joys

That we can hope for, if deferr'd, prove toys;
Therefore this instant, and in private, meet
A husband, that will gladly at your feet
Lay down his honours, tend'ring them to you
With all content, the church being paid her due.
Is this the arrogant piece of paper? fool!
Will you still be one? In the name of mad-
Could his good honour write more to content
ness, what
[you?
Is there aught else to be wish'd after these two
And lawful pleasure after: what would you
That are already offer'd? Marriage first,

more?

Marg. Why, Sir, I would be married like
your daughter,
[whither,
Not hurried away i'the night, I know not
Without all ceremony; no friends invited,
To honour the solemnity.

Allw. An't please your honour,
(For so before to-morrow I must style you,)
My lord desires this privacy in respect
His honourable kinsmen are far off,
And his desires to have it done brook not
So long delay as to expect their coming;
And yet he stands resolv'd, with all due pomp,
When he has brought your honour up to Lon-
To have his marriage at court celebrated,

don.

Sir G. He tells you true, 'tis the fashion, on
my knowledge;

Yet the good lord, to please your peevishness,
Must put it off, forsooth.

Marg. I could be contented

Were you but by to do a father's part,
And give me in the church.

Sir G. So my lord have you,

morrow

What do I care who gives you? since my lord Does purpose to be private, I'll not cross him. I know not, Mr. Allworth, how my lord May be provided, and therefore there's a purse. Of gold; 'twill serve this night's expense; to[time, The end may yet prove happy. Now, my All-I'll furnish him with any sums. In the meanworth. [Apart to ALLWORTH. Use my ring to my chaplain; [Offers it.] he Allw. To your letter, and put on a seeming is benific'd [Welldo; anger. [Apart. At my manor of Gotham, and call'd parson Marg. I'll pay my lord all debts due to his "Tis no matter for a license, I'll bear him out title; [honour And when with terms not taking from his He does solicit me, I shall gladly hear him; But in this peremptory, nay, commanding way, To fix a time and place without my knowledge; A priest, to tie the knot can ne'er be undone

in't.

Marg. With your favour, Sir, what warrant

is your ring?

He may suppose I got that twenty ways,
Without your knowledge? and then to be

refus'd

Were such a stain upon me: if you please, |
Your presence would do better.
[Sir,

Sir G. Still perverse?

I say again, I will not cross my lord;
Yet I'll prevent you too-Paper and ink there.
Allw. Sir, it's ready here.

Sir G. I thank you; I can write then to my
chaplain.

[Writes. Allw. Sir Giles, you may, if you please, leave out the name of my lord, In respect he would be private, and only write, Marry her to this gentleman.

Sir G. Well advis'd; "Tis done; away [Gives ALLWORTH the paper.] my blessing, girl? thou hast it. [MARGARET kneels. Nay, no reply-Begone, good Mr. Allworth, This shall be the best night's work you ever made.

Allw. I hope so, Sir.

[Exeunt ALLWORTH and MARGARET.
Sir G. Now all's cock-sure.
Methinks, I hear already knights and ladies
Say, Sir Giles Overreach, how is it with
Your honourable daughter.

Lord L. It is a thankfulness that well becomes you.

Lady A. For me, I am happy

That my endeavours prosper'd. Saw you of
Sir Giles, your uncle?
[late

Well. I heard of him Madam,
By his minister, Marrall: he's grown into
strange passions
[for
About his daughter. This last night he look'd
Your lordship at his house; but, missing you,
And Margaret not appearing, his wise head
[widow-Is much perplex'd and troubled.
Lord L. I hope my project took.
Lady A. I strongly hope it.

My ends, my ends, are compass'd! Then for
Wellborn

And the lands? were he once married to the
I have him here I can scarce contain myself,
I am so full of joy; nay, joy all over.

ACT V.

[Exit.

But all the arts that I have us'd to raise
The fortunes of your joy and mine, young
Allworth,

Stand yet in supposition, though I hope well.
For the young lovers are in wit more pregnant
Than their years can promise; and for their
On my knowledge, they are equal. [desires,
Lady A. Though my wishes
[fear
Are with yours, my lord, yet give me leave to
The building, though well-grounded. To de-
Sir Giles (that's both a lion and a fox [ceive
In his proceedings) were a work beyond
The strongest undertakers; not the trial
Of two weak innocents.

Lord L. Despair not, Madam;

Hard things are compass'd oft by easy means.
The cunning statesman, that believes he fa-

thoms

Sir G. [Without.] Ha! find her, booby!
thou huge lump of nothing!
I'll bore thine eyes out else.

Well. May it please your lordship,
For some ends of mine own, but to withdraw
A little out of sight, though not of hearing,
You may perhaps have sport.

Lord L. You shall direct me. [Steps aside.
SIR GILES OVERREACH, with distracted looks,
enters, driving in MARRALL.

Sir G. Idiot! booby!
Mar. Sir, for what cause
Do you use me thus?

Sir G. Cause, slave? why I am angry,
And thou a subject only fit for beating;
And so to cool my choler. Look to the writing;
Let but the seal be broke upon the box
That has slept in my cabinet these three years,
I'll rack thy soul for't.

Mar. I may yet cry quittance,
Though now I suffer, and dare not resist.

[Aside.

Sir G. His fortune swells him; 'Tis rank; he's married.

[Aside. [Aside. Sir G. Sir, in calm language (though I seldom use it)

Lady A. This is excellent.

I am familiar with the cause that makes you Bear up thus bravely; there's a certain buzz Of a stol'n marriage; do you hear? of a stol'n marriage; [cozen'd. In which 'tis said there's somebody hath been I name no parties.

[LADY ALLWORTH turns away. Well. Well, Sir, and what follows? Sir G. Marry, this: since you are peremptory, remember,

Upon mere hope of your great match, I lent you
A thousand pounds; put me in good security,
And suddenly, by mortgage or by statute,
Of some of your new possessions, or I'll have
you

Dragg'd in your lavender robes to the gaol: you know me,

And therefore do not trifle.
Well. Can you be

So cruel to your nephew, now he's in
The way to rise? Was this the courtesy
You did me in pure love and no ends else?'
Sir G. End me no ends; engage the whole
estate,

[have And force your spouse to sign it; you shall Three or four thousand more to roar and swagAnd revel in taverns.

[ger,

Nor bond, nor bill, nor bare acknowledgement.
Your great looks fright not me.
Sir G. But my deeds shall-
[They both draw.
Lady A. Help! murder! murder!

Sir G. That I had thee

But single in the field!

Ludy A. You may; but make not My house your quarrelling scene. Sir G. Wer't in a church,

By heaven and hell I'll do't!
Mur. Now put him to

The showing of the deed.

[To WELLBORN.

Well. This rage is vain, Sir; For fighting, fear not, you shall have your hands Upon the least incitement; and whereas [full You charge me with a debt of a thousand pounds, [science)

If there be law, (howe'er you have no con-
Either restore my land, or I'll recover
A debt that's truly due to me from you,
In value ten times more than what you chal-
lenge.

Sir G. I in thy debt? oh, impudence! did I not purchase

The land left by thy father? that rich land That had continued in Wellborn's name Twenty descents; which, like a riotous fool, Thou didst make sale of?

Two SERVANTS enter with a box.

O, you're come at last. Is not here enclos'd
The deed that does confirm it mine?
Mar. Now, now!

[Aside. [o'er

Well. I do acknowledge none; I ne'er pass'd Such land: I grant, for a year or two, You had it in trust; which, if you do discharge, Surrendering the possession, you shall ease Yourself and me of chargeable suits in law; Which, if you prove not honest (as I doubt it) Must of necessity follow.

Lady A. In my judgment, He does advise you well.

Sir G. Good, good! conspire With your new husband, lady; second him In his dishonest practices; but, when This manor is extended to my use, You'll speak in humbler key, and sue for favour. Lady A. Never; do not hope it. Well. Let despair first seize me.

Sir G. Yet, to shut up thy mouth, and make thee give

Thyself the lie, the loud lie, I draw out The precious evidence; if thou canst, forswear Thy hand and seal, and make a forfeit of [Opens the box, and takes out the deed. Thy ears to the pillory.-See, here's that will My interest clear- Ha! [make

Lady A. A fair skin of parchment! Well. Indented, I confess, and labels too; But neither wax nor words. How! thunderstruck! ['makes Is this your precious evidence; is this that Your interest clear?'

Sir G. I am o'erwhelm'd with wonder! What prodigy is this? what subtle devil Hath raz'd out the inscription? the wax Turn'd into dust-the rest of my deeds whole As when they were deliver'd; and this only Made nothing!-Do you deal with witches, rascal?

There is a statute for you, which will bring Your neck in a hempen circle; yes, there is.And now 'tis better thought; for, cheater, This juggling shall not save you.

Well. To save thee

Would beggar the stock of mercy. Sir G. Marrall!

Mar. Sir.

[know

Sir G. Though the witnesses are dead, [Flatters him.

Your testimony

Help with an oath or two; and for thy master,
Thy liberal master, my good honest servant,
I know you will swear any thing to dash [too
This cunning slight: the deed being drawn
By thee, my careful Marrall, and deliver'd
When you were present, will make good my
Wilt thou not swear this?
[title.

Mur. I! no, I assure you.--
I have a conscience, not sear'd up like yours
I know no deeds.

Sir G. Wilt thou betray me?
Mar. Keep him

From using his hands, I'll use my tongue
To his no little torment.

Sir G. Mine own varlet
Rebel against me?

Mar. Yes, and uncase you too. The idiot; the patch; the slave; the booby; The property, fit only to be beaten For your morning exercise; your foot-ball, or Th' unprofitable lump of flesh; your drudge;Can now anatomize you, and lay open All your black plots, level with the earth Your hill of pride, and shake,

[you.

Nay pulverize, the walls you think defend

Lady A. How he foams at the mouth with
rage!

Sir G. O that I had thee in my gripe, I would
tear thee

Joint after joint!

Mar. I know you are a tearer.
But I'll have first your fangs par'd off, and then
Come nearer to you; when I have discover'd,
And made it good before the judge, what ways
And devilish practices you us'd to cozen with.
Sir G. But that I will live, rogue, to torture
thee,

And make thee wish, and kneel in vain, to die;
These swords that keep thee from me should
fix here,

Although they made my body but one wound,
But I would reach thee.-

I play the fool, and make my anger but ridi-
culous.
There will be a time and place, there will be,
[cowards!
When you shall feel what I dare do.

Well. I think so:

You dare do any ill, yet want true valour
To be honest and repent.

Sir G. They are words I know not,
Nor e'er will learn. Patience, the beggar's
Shall find no harbour here.

Lady A. Whom have we here?
Sir G. My chaplain comes.—

[virtue,

PARSON WELLDO enters, with a letter in his
hand, and LOVELL behind.

Welcome, most welcome:
There's comfort in thy looks; is the deed done?
Is my daughter married? say but so, my chap-
And I am tame.
[lain,

Welldo. Married? yes,
I assure you.
Sir G. Then vanish all sad thoughts!
My doubts and fears are in the titles drown'd
Of my honourable, my right honourable daugh-
ter,

Mar. What think you, Sir; was it not wisely
done

To turn his wicked arts upon himself?

[To WELLBORN.
Sir G. Instantly be here!
[Whispering to WELLDO.
To my wish, to my wish. Now you that plot
against me,
And hop'd to trip my heels up; that contemn'd
[me;
Think on't, and tremble. [Loud music.] They
come, I hear the music.

A lane there for my lord.
Well. This sudden heat
May yet be cool'd, Sir.

Sir G. Make way there for my lady and my
[Music.

lord.

dren!

Baffled and fool'd, and all my hopes and labours
Defeated and made void.

Well. As it appears,
You are so, my grave uncle.
Revenge their wrongs with curses: I'll not
Sir G. Village nurses
Which, wretch! I gave to thee.
A syllable; but thus I take the life [waste

[Offers to kill MARGARET.
Lord L. Hold, for your own sake!
Though charity to your daughter hath quite left
you.

[here,
Will you do an act, though in your hopes lost
Can leave no hope for peace or rest hereafter?
And at thy counsel; and again desire thee,
Sir G. Lord! thus I spit at thee,.
As thou art a soldier, if thy valour
Dare show itself where multitude and example
Lead not the way, let's quit the house, and
Six words in private.
[change

Lord L. I am ready.

Well. You'll grow like him,
Should you answer his vain challenge.
Borrow his help, though Hercules call it odds,
Sir G. Are you pale?
I'll stand against both, as I am hemm'd in thus.
Say, they were a squadron
[mounted
Upon my injuries, shall I fear to charge 'em?
Of pikes, lin'd through with shot, when I am
No, I'll through the battalia, and that routed,
I'll fall to execution.

[Attempts to draw his sword.
Ha! 1 am feeble:
Some undone widow sits upon my arm,
And takes away the use of't! and my sword,
Glu'd to my scabbard with wrong'd orphans'
Will not be drawn.
tears,
Ha! what are these? Sure, hangmen,
[Falls into his Servants' arms.
That come to bind my hands, and then drag
[shapes,
Before the judgment seat!-Now they are new
And do appear like furies, with steel whips,
Ingloriously, and yield? No, spite of fate,
To scourge my ulcerous soul! Shall I then fall
I will be forc'd to hell like to myself.
Though you were legions of accursed spirits,
Thus would I fly among you!

[Servants carry him off.
Mar. Was it not a rare trick,
An't please your worship, to make the deed no-
Certain minerals I us'd,
Incorporated with the ink and wax.
{thing?
With hopes and blows; and that was the in-
Besides, he gave me nothing, but still fed me
To this conundrum.
[ducement
Well. You are a rascal. He, that dares be
false

To any other. Look not for reward
To a master, though unjust, will ne'er be true

Or favour from me; I will shun thy sight
As I would do a basilisk's. Thank my pity,
If thou keep thy ears; howe'er, I will take
Your practice shall be silenc'd.

Just. Gr. I'll commit him,
If you will have me, Sir.

[order

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