in that heathen author about Christ. His narrative proceeds: "My health, at the same time, failing, it was not long before I sunk away into the most distressing melancholy, soon became entirely discouraged and went home, with a view to be a farmer, if God should spare my life, despairing of ever being a minister of the Gospel. The distresses of these days and weeks, no one can have any idea of, except by experience. My soul hath the bitterness of that season still fresh in remembrance. The laughing school cared nothing for me, neither did the stupid world. I knew that my friends would be mortified to have me return discouraged. I was like one aloft, on a rolling pole, and on the verge of destruction. I was ready to conclude, that all was against me as a Christian, and trembled for fear I should become an apostate. But, he who pitieth the afflicted and heareth the cries of the distressed and helpless, kept me in this dreadful day from total despair and utter ruin, and praised be his name. To the Lord Jesus I made my sorrows known, and looked for relief. I greatly feared, that, having given up all idea of the ministry, I should soon get buried up in the world, and care nothing about religion.” In this state of discouragement he returned to the business of husbandry, and, for about three months, his studies were suspended. Of the state of his mind, in the time, he gives the following account: "My mind became more calm, and, contrary to my dismal fear, I found, that, though I had given up all hope of the ministry, yet, if ever I loved reli gion, I loved it still. This, instead of destroying my hope, strengthened it. On the seventh of September, I wrote: 'Things appeared to me more clear to-day-my soul seemed to long after God-his people and his kingdom still appeared lovely.' After bitter complaint of coldness, worldly-mindedness and the like, I find written, November fourth : Last Wednesday night, I experienced a great revival of religious feeling,-whether true or false God knoweth, I felt grieved to see or hear any thing done against the ministers of Jesus, and I think they looked beautiful for their work's sake. I also felt a desire to be made, though unworthy, an instrument of the glory of God and of good in the world.' In the forepart of December, my hope, respecting the Gospel ministry, began to revive, and on the fifteenth of this month, I went to school again to Mr. Barker. After writing, December ninth, 'It appears to me, that I am the most ignorant, and that I never shall be fit for any service in the world,' are these lines: 'Though I am dark, yet Christ is light, And in his service make me strong." Mr. Hallock spent the next year in the study of Latin-part of it at Northampton, in the academic school of the late Dr. Dwight. He afterwards pursued his studies, for about eighteen months, with Rev. Mr. Strong, of Williamsburgh. "On the eighth of March, 1781, I made a public profession of Christ, and united with his church in Goshen. Among the things I then wrote are these words: 'O, the solemn oath that I have made this day. O that God would give me grace to live according to my promise, that I might so walk as not to bring a reproach upon the religion of his dear Son.' In September, 1782, when I suppose I was fitted for college, I felt for some time unwell, and was threatened with serious illness. I then wrote: Dark symptoms of sickness seem very different from what they once did. They do not appear terrifying or awful, but more like friends than enemies, because they are many times used as instruments to open the way for saints to their Father's house. O Lord, search me, and try me, and leave me not to build upon a false foundation.' One thing, that greatly tried me for a year, was an unmanning bashfulness, so that sometimes I could hardly repeat my lesson. It attended me in prayer, and almost every kind of performance, and I greatly feared, it would effectually disqualify me for the ministry. I believe now, though I did not think so at the time, that it was owing to the state of my nerves, weakened by study. "About this time, I began to make the following resolves, and, from time to time, continued to make them, according to my situation and the occurrences of my life. These I resolved to renew, once a week, unless unavoidably interrupted; which I have done, and I trust, to my spiritual profit.* Endeavoring to lean on the Beloved for strength to perform : The reader will recollect, that Mr. Hallock wrote this account of his life in the years 1815 and 1821. "1. I am resolved to avoid all known sins, and to practise all known duties; to read the word of God, and other good books, and go according to the light I find in them. "2. Resolved to watch over my conduct respecting my aged parents, never to give them an unkind word, but to love and honor them, as enjoined in the fifth commandment, and to obey and follow them, wherein they follow Christ. "3. I am resolved, three times a day, unless my circumstances render it impossible, to retire and read a portion of Scripture and pray ;-to be much in ejaculatory prayer, and in times of unusual trouble to be more than commonly prayerful. "4. Resolved to keep a general journal of the most remarkable occurrences of my life. "5. Am resolved to be faithful to my dear consort, to seek to instruct, watch over, and bring up my children in the fear of God, and to pray and travail in birth for them, until Christ is formed in them the hope of glory. "6. I am resolved to show my superiors, inferiors and equals due respect at all times, and not to have the faith of our Lord Jesus Christ with respect to persons. "7. Am resolved to be careful of another's character, and to say nothing against him directly or indirectly, unless I think the interest of religion and the honor of God call me to it. "8. Resolved, never to look upon myself to have attained, but to press forward. "9. Resolved, never to put myself forward in any thing, especially in matters of religion, but always to take the lowest place. "10. Resolved, in all my troubles, to be careful how I complain or speak of them; and to say and do that which may be most for the glory of God, who is as worthy of praise in my adversity as in my prosperity. "11. Resolved, the first thing in the morning, to give myself up to the Lord; to study what I can do most for his glory that day, and by prayer to set about it; and that this shall be the last thing at night. "12. Resolved to receive all unkindnesses with patience, to keep counsel and speak against no persons, unless I think I am in duty called to it. "13. Resolved, if in my power, to read at least four portions of Scripture, or hear them read, every day. "14. Resolved, to try all my sermons by God's word, and endeavor to get good from them before I preach them, and to deliver them as if I was about to give up my last account. "15. I am resolved, not only to preach what I find agreeable to the word of God to others, but to endeavor to practise it myself. "16. Resolved, that nothing be lost, but, that what little time and strength I have, be spent in the service of God. "17. I am resolved to pray for all people, especially for the church and my enemies. "18. Resolved, never to be too much lifted up, |