IN my yesterday's paper I propofed, that the honeft men of all parties fhould enter into a kind of affociation for the defence of one another, and the confufion of their common enemics. As it is defigned this neutral body should act with a regard to nothing but truth and equity, and diveft themselves of the little heats and prepoffeffions that cleave to parties of all kinds, I have prepared for them the following form of an affociation, which may exprefs their intentions in the most plain and fimple manner.

We whofe names are hereunto fub* fcribed do folemnly declare, that we do in our confciences believe two and two make four; and that we shall adjudge any man whatfoever to be our enemy who endeavours to perfuade us to the contrary. We are likewife ready to 'maintain with the hazard of all that ' is near and dear to us, that fix is lefs 'than feven in all times and all places; and that ten will not be more three years hence than it is at prefent. We do alfo firmly declare, that it is our refolution as long as we live to call 'black black, and white white. And 'we shall upon all occafions oppofe fuch perfons that upon any day of the year

all call black white, or white black, with the utmost peril of our lives and 'fortunes.'

Were there fuch a combination of honeft men, who without any regard to places, would endeavour to extirpate all fuch furious zealots as would facrifice one half of their country to the paffion and intereft of the other; as alfo fuch infamous hypocrites, that are for promoting their own advantage, under colour of the public good; with all the profligate immoral retainers to each fide, that have nothing to recommend them but an implicit fubmiffion to their leaders; we thould foon fee that furious party-fpirit extinguished, which may in time expofe us to the derifion and contempt of all the nations about us.

DRYDEN.

A member of this fociety, that would thus carefully employ himself in making room for merit, by throwing down the worthlefs and depraved part of mankind from thofe confpicuous ftations of life to which they have been sometimes advanced, and all this without any regard to his private intereft, would be no small benefactor to his country.

I remember to have read in Diodorus Siculus an account of a very active little animal, which I think he calls the Ichneumon, that makes it the whole bufinefs of his life to break the eggs of the crocodile, which he is always in fearch after. This inftinct is the more remarkable, because the Ichneumon never feeds upon the eggs he has broken, nor any other way finds his account in them. Were it not for the inceffant labours of this induftrious animal, Egypt,' fays the hiftorian, would be over-run with crocodiles; for the Egyptians are fo far from destroying thofe pernicious creatures, that they worship them as gods.'

If we look into the behaviour of ordinary partizans, we fhall find them far from refembling this difinterested animal, and rather acting after the example of the wild Tartars, who are ambitious of deftroying a man of the most extraordinary parts and accomplishments, as thinking that upon his decease the same talents, whatever poft they qualified him for, enter of course into his deftroyer.

Ás in the whole train of my specula. tions, I have endeavoured as much as I am able to extinguish that pernicious fpirit of paffion and prejudice, which rages with the fame violence in all parties, I am ftill the more defirous of doing fome good in this particular, becaufe I obferve that the fpirit of party reigns more in the country than in the town. It here contracts a kind of brutality and ruftic fierceness, to which men of a politer conversation are wholly

strangers.

ftrangers. It extends itself even to the return of the bow and the hat; and at the fame time that the heads of parties preferve towards one another an outward thew of good-breeding, and keep up a perpetual intercourfe of civilities, their tools that are difpetfed in thefe outlying parts will not fo much as mingle together at a cock-match. This humour fills the country with feveral periodical meetings of Whig jockies and Tory foxhunters; not to mention the innumerable curfes, frowns, and whifpers, it produces at a quarter-feffions.

I do not know whether I have obferved in any of my former papers, that my friend Sir Roger de Coverley and Sir Andrew Freeport are of different principles, the firit of them inclined to the landed, and the other to the monied intereft. This humour is fo moderate in each of them, that it proceeds no farther than to an agreeable raillery, which very often diverts the rest of the club. I find, however, that the knight is a much ftronger Tory in the country than in town, which, as he has told me in my ear, is abfolutely neceffary for the keeping up his intereft. In all our journey from London to his houfe we did not fo much as bait at a Whig-inn; or if by chance the coachman ftopped at a wrong place, one of Sir Roger's fervants would ride up to his mafter full speed, and whifper to him that the mafter of the houfe was against fuch an one in the last election. This often betrayed us into hard beds and bad cheer; for we were not fo inquifitive about the inn as the inn-keeper; and provided our landlord's principles were found, did not take any notice of the ftalenefs of his provifions. This I found ftill the more inconvenient, because the better the hoft was, the worfe generally were his accommodations; the fellow knowing very well that thofe who were his friends would take up with coarfe diet and an hard lodging. For thefe reafons, all the while I was upon the road I dreaded

entering into an houfe of any one that Sir Roger had applauded for an honeft

man.

Since my ftay at Sir Roger's in the country, I daily find more inftances of this narrow party-humour. Being upon the bowling-green at a neighbouring market-town the other day, for that is the place where the gentlemen on one fide meet once a week, I observed a ftranger among them of a better prefence and genteeler behaviour than ordinary; but was much furprised, that notwithstanding he was a very fair better, nobody would take him up. But upon enquiry I found, that he was one who had given a difagreeable vote in a former parliament, for which reafon there was not a man upon that bowling-green who would have fo much correfpondence with him as to win his money of him.

Among other inftances of this nature, I must not omit one which concerns myself. Will Wimble was the other day relating several strange storics that he had picked up nobody knows where of a certain great man; and upon my ftaring at him, as one that was furprifed to hear fuch things in the country, which had never been fo much as whifpered in the town, Will ftopped fhort in the thread of his discourse, and after dinner asked my friend Sir Roger in his ear if he was fure that I was not a fanatic.

It gives me a ferious concern to fee fuch a spirit of diffenfion in the country; not only as it deftroys virtue and common fenfe, and renders us in a manner barbarians towards one another, but as it perpetuates our animofities, widens our breaches, and transmits our prefent paffions and prejudices to our pofterity. For my own part, I am fometimes afraid that I difcover the feeds of a civil war in these our diverfions; and therefore cannot but bewail, as in their firft principles, the miferies and calamities of our children.

C

N° CXXVIL

PERS. SAT. I. V. I.

MR. SPECTATOR,

You have diverted the town almost

a whole month at the expence of the country, it is now high time that you should give the country their revenge. Since your withdrawing from this place, the fair-fex are run into great extravagancies. Their petticoats, which began to heave and fwell before you left us, are now blown up into a moft enormous concave, and rife every day more and more: in short, Sir, fince our women know themselves to be out of the

eye of the Spectator, they will be kept within no compafs. You praised them a little too foon, for the modesty of their head-dreffes; for as the humour of a fick perfon is often driven out of one limb into another, their fuperfluity of ornaments, instead of being entirely banifhed, feems only fallen from their heads upon their lower parts. What they have loft in height they make upin breadth, and contrary to all rules of architecture widen the foundations at the fame time that they fhorten the fuperstructure. Were they, like Spanish jennets, to impregnate by the wind, they could not have thought on a more proper invention. But as we do not yet hear any particular use in this petticoat, or that it contains any thing more than what was fuppofed to be in thofe of fcantier make, we are wonderfully at a lofs about it.

The women give out, in defence of thefe wide bottoms, that they are

airy, and very proper for the seafon; but this I look upon to be only a pretence, and a piece of art, for it is well known we have not had a more moderate fummer these many years, fo that it is certain the heat they complain of cannot be in the weather: befides, I would fain afk these tender-conftitutioned ladies, why they fhould require more cooling than their mothers before them?

I find feveral fpeculative perfons are of opinion that our fex has of late years been very faucy, and that the hoop-petticoat is made ufe of to keep us at a dif tance. It is moft certain that a woman's honour cannot be better intrenched than after this manner, in circle within circle, amidst such a variety of out-works and lines of circumvallation. A female who is thus invested in whalebone is fufficiently fecured against the approaches of an ill-bred fellow, who might as well think of Sir George Etherege's way of making love in a tub, as in the midst of fo many hoops.

Among thefe various conjectures, there are men of fuperftitious tempers, who look upon the hoop-petticoat as a kind of prodigy. Some will have it that it portends the downfal of the French King, and observe that the farthingal appeared in England a little before the ruin of the Spanish monarchy. Others are of opinion that it foretels battle and bloodshed, and believe it of the fame prognoftication as the tail of a blazing star. For my part, I am apt to think it is a fign that multitudes are coming into the world rather than going out of it.

The first time I saw a lady dreffed in one of these petticoats, I could not forbear blaming her in my own thoughts for walking abroad when he was fo near her time, but foon recovered myself out of my error, when I found all the modif part of the fex as far gone as herself. It is generally thought fome crafty women have thus betrayed their companions into hoops, that they might make them acceffary to their own concealments,

2 I

and

and by that means efcape the cenfure of the world; as wary generals have fometimes drefled two or three dozen of their friends in their own habit, that they might not draw upon themselves any particular attacks from the enemy. The trutting petticoat fmooths all diftinctions, levels the mother with the daugh ter, and fets maids and matrons, wives and widows, upon the fame bottom. In the mean while, I cannot but be troubled to fee fo many well-fhaped innocent virgins bloated up, and waddling up and down like big-bellied wo

men.

Should this fashion get among the ordinary people, our public ways would be fo crouded that we should want ftretroom. Several congregations of the best fashion find themielves already very much ftraitened, and if the mode increases I wish it may not drive many ordinary women into meetings and conventicles. Should our fex at the fame time take it into their heads to wear trunk breeches, as who knows what their indignation at this female treatment may drive them to, a man and his wife would fill a whole pew.

You know, Sir, it is recorded of Alexander the Great, that in his Indian expedition he buried several fuits of armour, which by his direction were made much too big for any of his foldiers, in order to give pofterity an extraordinary idea of him, and make them believe he had commanded an army of giants. I

am perfuaded that if one of the prefent petticoats happens to be hung up in any repofitory of curiofities, it will lead into the fame error the generations that lie fome removes from us; unlefs we can believe our pofterity will think fo difrefpectfully of their great grandmothers, that they made themfelves monftrous to appear amiable.

When I furvey this new-fashioned rotunda in all it's parts, I cannot but think of the old philofopher, who, after having entered into an Egyptian temple, and looked about for the idol of the the place, at length difcovered a little black monkey enshrined in the midft of it, upon which he could not forbear crying out, to the great fcandal of the 'worth ppers- What a magnificent palace is here for fuch a ridiculous in'habitant!'

Though you have taken a resolution, in one of your papers, to avoid descending to particularitics of drefs, I believe you will not think it below you, on fo extraordinary an occafion, to unhoop the fair-fex, and cure this fashionable tympany that is got among them. I am apt to think the petticoat will shrink of it's own accord at your first coming to town; at least a touch of your pen will make it contract itself, like the fenfitive plant, and by that means oblige feveral who are either terrified or aftonished at

this portentous novelty, and among the reft, your humble fervant, &c. C

HARMONIOUS DISCORD.

nature are

LUCAN. L. I. v. 98.

them out of the paths of reason. This

than men; whether it be that their blood is more refined, their fibres more delicate, and their animal fpirits more light and volatile; or whether, as fome, have imagined, there may not be a kind of fex in the very foul, I fhall not pretend to determine. As vivacity is the gift of women, gravity is that of men. They should each of them, therefore, keep a watch upon the particular bias which nature has fixed in their minds, that it may not draw too much and lead

word and action affects the character of being rigid and severe, and the other of being brisk and airy. Men fhould beware of being captivated by a kind of favage philofophy, women by a thoughtlefs gallantry. Where these precautions are not obferved, the man often degenerates into a cynic, the woman into a coquette; the man grows fullen and morofe, the woman impertinent and fantastical.

By what I have faid, we may conclude,

elude, men and women are made as counterparts to one another, that the pains and anxieties of the hufband might be relieved by the sprightlinefs and good humour of the wife. When these are rightly tempered, care and chearfulnefs go hand and hand; and the family, like a fhip that is duly trimmed, wants neither fail nor ballast.

Natural historians obferve, for whilft I am in the country I mult fetch my allufions from thence, that only the male birds have voices; that their fongs begin a little before breeding-time, and end a little after; that whilft the hen is covering her eggs, the male generally takes his ftand upon a neighbouring bough within her hearing; and by that means amufes and diverts her with his fongs during the whole time of her fitting. This contract among birds lasts no longer than till a brood of young ones arifes from it; fo that in the feathered kind, the dares and fatigues of the married ftate, if I may fo call it, lie principally upon the feniale. On the contrary, as in our fpecies the man and the woman are joined together for life, and the main burden refts upon the former, nature has given all the little arts of foothing and blandishment to the female, that he may chear and animate her companion in a conftant and affiduous application to the making a provifion for his family, and the educating of their common children. This however is not to be taken fo ftrictly, as if the fame duties were not often reciprocal, and incumbent on both parties; but only to fet forth what feems to have been the general intention of nature, in the different inclinations and endowments which are bestowed on the different fexes.

But whatever was the reason that man and woman were made with this variety of temper, if we obferve the conduct of the fair-fex, we find that they choose rather to affociate themselves with a person who resembles them in that light and volatile humour which is natural to them, than to fuch as are qualified to moderate and counter-balance it. It has been an old complaint, that the coxcomb carries it with them before the man of fenfe. When we fee a fellow loud and talkative, full of infipid life and laughter, we may venture to pronounce him a female favourite; noife and flutter are fuch accomplishments as

they cannot withstand. To be fhort, the paffion of an ordinary woman for a man is nothing elfe but felf love diverted upon another object: she would have the lover a woman in every thing but the fex. I do not know a finer piece of fatire on this part of womankind, than thofe lines of Mr. Dryden,

Our thoughtlefs fex is caught by outward form And empty noife, and loves itself in man.

This is a fource of infinite calamities to the fex, as it frequently joins them to men, who in their own thoughts are as fine creatures as themfelves; or if they chance to be good-humoured, ferve only to diffipate their fortunes, inflame their follies, and aggravate their indifcretions.

The fame female levity is no lefs fatal to them after marriage than before: it reprefents to their imaginations the faithful prudent husband as an honest tractable and domeftic animal; and turns their thoughts upon the fine gay gentleman that laughs, fings, and dreffes, fo much more agreeably.

As this irregular vivacity of temper leads aftray the hearts of ordinary women in the choice of their lovers and the treatment of their husbands, it operates with the fame pernicious influence towards their children, who are taught to accomplish themselves in all thofe fublime perfections that appear captivating in the eye of their mother. She admires in her fon what the loved in her gallant; and by that means contributes all he can to perpetuate herself in a worthlefs progeny.

The younger Fauftina was a lively inftance of this fort of women. Notwithstanding fhe was married to Marcus Aurelius, one of the greatest, wilest, and beft of the Roman emperors, fhe thought a common gladiator much the prettier gentleman; and had taken such care to accomplish her fon Commo-" dus according to her own notions of a fine man, that when he afcended the throne of his father, he became the mott foolish and abandoned tyrant that was ever placed at the head of the Roman empire, fignalizing himself in nothing but the fighting of prizes, and knocking out mens brains. As he had no tafte of true glory, we fee him in feveral medals and ftatues which are still extant of him, equipped like an Hercules with a club and a lion's skin.