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A splinter knock'd my nose off;

My bowsprit's gone! I cries,
Yet well it kept their ijlows off,

Thank God, 'twas not my eyes;
Chance, if it again send6 that sort,

.Let's hope I've had my share.
Thus, if bold tars, etc.

Scarce with these words I'd outed,

Glad for my eyes and limbs,
When'a cartridge buret, arid douted

Both my two precious gliiiss;
Well then, they're gone, I cry'd, in short,

Yet fate my life did spare.

And thus, tho' tars, &c.

I'm blind, and I'm a cripple,

Yet cheerfully wou'd sing,
VVere my disasters triple;

'Cause why,—'twas for my King;
Besides each Christian exhort,

Pleas'd with some pittance spare.
And thus, tho' tars are Fortune's sport,
They still are Fortune's care.

AT the very best of houses, where the best qf
people dine,
And the very best of eatables they cater,
Give the very best of spirits, and decant the

best of wine,
I attend as a very merry waiter.

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Then a table-cloth can spread, neat decant my white and red, Manage matters to a charm, and with napkin , under arm, Can a skinflint or jolly fellow tell, whether they'll come down, Gold, a tissey, or a crown; so treats 'em as I find them, ill or well. And when noisy, roaring, drumming, tingling, ringling, I cries coming, coming, coming, coming, coming, coming, coming, coming; going in, Madam; going up, Sir; damn the bells, they're all ringing at once!

In their very merry meetings, why I always likes to share; Whole bottles, sometimes broke, why then I snack' it: In that I'm quite at home, so it travels, youknow where, Sally chambermaid and I slily crack it; She a little fortune's made, just by warming a bed, So I think it not amiss, now and then to snatch a kiss; For you know I love Sally very well. So hob-nobbing as-we chat, looking, loving, and all that, In our ears they're ever ringing such a peal: Missus, maids, all bawling, drumming, Tinkling, jingling, I cries coming, &c. John, devil some biscuits, and take them up to the Angel.—Tom, you take care of No. 21; I shall take care of No. 1 myself.

A snipe

A snipe there once was order'd, such an article we'd not; Yet to disappoint a customer unwilling, A plover was serv'd up, the geinman swore no bill 't had got; Says I swallow it, I'll soon bring the bill in. Thus I jokes, and gaily talk, while poor master jokes with chalk, And jingling glasses drink, while I jingle in the chink,. Cod! he breaks, and T buy in, who can tell; Sally Missus then is made;—up to every servant's trade, We are certain sure, your honours, to do well; Brisk and busy, no hum drumming, Tinkling, jingling, I cries coming, &c. James, take care of No. 4, and see that Sam Celler-Man sends up prick'd bottles; they're a shabby sot, and wc may never sec them again. —Mrs. Napkin, show my Lord the Star and Garter; and Lawyer Lattitat to the Devil. He's going there himself, Sir; he knows the way very well.

MOW we're all met here together,
In spite of wind or weather,
To moisten well our clay;
Before we think of jogging,
Let's take a cheerful nogging;

Where's the waiter? ring away:
Where's the glees, and the catches,
The tobacco-pipes and matches,

And

And plenty of brown stout;
Yet the ghoses, e'er we start 'em,
Let's proceed secundem urtem;

Let die clerk all the names read out. Spoken—Gentlemen of theQuizzical Society ,pleas« to answer to your names—Fanner Scroggins; why I be here—Doctor Horseleach; here—Parson Paunch; here—Taylor Tit; here—So he goes on for about twenty; at last—You're here, are you, all assembled ?—AH ! all! all! all! So here's to you, Mr. Wiggftis, Here's to you Master Higgius, So put the beer about, &c.

Come tell us what the news is,
Who wins and who loses,

Of the times what do people say;
Hard,hard! the landlord racks us,
Then we've such a load of taxes \

Indeed! well, and how goes hay? Why, now, there's master Wiseman, He tells the Exciseman That the cause of this bother and routOrder! order, and sobritty, The rules of this society, Let the Clerk read them out /Spoken—Every member of thissocietythat spills his liquor in his neighbour's pocket shall forfeit 2d. —Every member of this society that singes his neighbour's wig with his pipe, shall forfeit 2d.— Every member of this society that refuses to laugh at a joke, shall forfei 12d—Every member of this society who reproaches his neighbour with coming to distress by unavoidable misfortunes, ttsnw, shall forfeit 3d.—Mr. President, I move that this forfeit be a shilling; and L second the motion.—Are you all agreed? I am unanimously.—A noble resolution!—D'ye think so? Why, then, here's to you, Mr. Higgins, Here's to you, Mr. Wiggins, etc.

And now the potent liquor

Is ot even spares the vicar,

But in all their noddles mounts;

While among this set of queerers,

All talkers and no iiearem,
Each his fav'rite tale recounts.'

The soldier talks of bat A:!

The grazier sells his cattle!
Conversation to provoke;

Till the juice of the barrel

Begets some curious quarrel,

While the company's lost in smoke.

Spoke*.—Upon my soul, neighbour, I had no hand in the death of your wife; it was all in the way of business :—Nay, but Doctor, 'twere a cursed unneighbourly thing of you, not that the w 01 nan .were any sitch great things, but to put a body to siteh an expense.—Why, you don t tell me so! kill'd fifteen with your own hand!—Fifteen by , my laurels! D'ye hear it, Butchers ?—Hear it, yes: but I'll lay' n what he dares, he has not kill'd to many as 1 have by hundreds—Powder my whiskers—Come, come, gentlemen, says the. Bellows-maker, no breezes.—Let me exhort you to temperance, says the Parson.—Amen, says the Clerk.—-That's right, says the Undertaker, let's bury all animosity.—That's what I like, F 'said

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