From whence they start up chofen veffels,
Made by contact, as men get meazles.
So cardinals, they fay, do grope

At t'other end the new-made pope.

Hold, hold, quoth Hudibras, foft fire,

They fay, does make sweet malt. Good fquire, Feftina lente, not too fast;

For hafte, the proverb fays, makes waste.

The quirks and cavils thou doft make

Are falfe, and built upon mistake.

And I fall bring you,

with your pack

Of fallacies, t'elenchi back;

And put your arguments in mood
And figure, to be understood.

I'll force you by right ratiocination

To leave your vitilitigation,

And make you keep to th'question close,
And argue dialectics.

The question then, to state it first,
Is which is better, or which worst,
Synods or bears? Bears I avow
To be the worst, aud fynods thou.
But to make good th'affertion,
Thou fay'ft th'are really all one.
If fo, not worft; for if th'are idem,
Why then, tantundem dat tantidem.
For if they are the fame, by courfe
Neither is better, neither worse.
But I deny they are the fame,
More than a maggot and I am.

That both are animalia,

I grant; but not rationalia:

For though they do agree in kind,
Specific difference we find;

And can no more make bears of these,
Than prove my horfe is Socrates.
That fynods are bear-gardens too,
Thou dost affirm; but I fay, no:
And thus I prove it, in a word;
Whats'ever affembly's not impower'd
To cenfure, curfe, abfolve, and ordain,
Can be no fynod: but bear-garden
Has no fuch power; ergo, 'tis none:
And fo thy fophiftry's o'erthrown.

But yet we are beside the queftion,
Which thou didft raife the first conteft on;
For that was, Whether bears were better
Than fynod-men? I fay, Negatur.
That bears are beafts, and fynods men,
Is held by all: they're better then :
For bears and dogs on four legs go,
As beafts; but fynod-men on two.
"Tis true, they all have teeth and nails;
But prove that fynod-men have tails;
Or that a rugged, fhaggy fur
Grows o'er the hide of prefbyter;
Or that his fnout and fpacious ears.
Do hold proportion with a bear's.
A bear's a favage beaft, of all.
Moft ugly and unnatural;

Whelp'd without form, until the dam
Has lick'd it into shape and frame:
But all thy light can ne'er evict,
That ever fynod-man was lick'd;
Or brought to any other fashion,
Than his own will and inclination.

But thou doft further yet in this
Oppugn thyfelf and fenfe; that is,
Thou wouldst have prefbyters to go
For bears and dogs, and bearwards toog
A ftrange chimera of beafts and men,
Made up of pieces heterogene,

Such as in nature never met

In eodem fubjecto yet.

Thy other arguments are all

Suppofers, hypothetical,

That do but beg, and we may chufe

Either to grant them, or refufe.

Much thou haft faid; which I know when
And where thou ftol'ft from other men,
(Whereby 'tis plain thy light and gifts
Are all but plagiary shifts:)

And is the fame that ranter faid,
Who, arguing with me, broke my head,
And tore a handful of my beard.
The felf-fame cavils then I heard,

When b'ing in hot difpute about
This controverfy, we fell out;

And what thou know'ft I answer'd then

Will ferve to answer thee agen.

Quoth Ralpho, Nothing but th'abuse Of human learning you produce; Learning, that cobweb of the brain, Profane, erroneous, and vain; A trade of knowledge, as replete As others are with fraud and cheat: An art t'incumber gifts and wit, And render both for nothing fit; Makes light inactive, dull, and troubled, Like little David in Saul's doublet; A cheat that scholars put upon Other mens reafon and their own; A fort of error, to enfconce Abfurdity and ignorance, That renders all the avenues To truth, impervious and abftrufe, By making plain things, in debate, By art perplex'd and intricate: For nothing goes for fenfe or light, That will not with old rules jump right: As if rules were not in the schools Deriv'd from truth, but truth from rules. This Pagan, Heathenith invention Is good for nothing but contention. For as, in fword-and-buckler fight, All blows do on the target light: So when men argue, the great'ft part O'th'conteft falls on terms of art, Until the fustian stuff be spent, And then they fall to th'argument.

Quoth Hudibras, Friend Ralph, thou hast Outrun the conftable at laft:

For thou art fallen on a new

Difpute, as fenfeless as untrue,
But to the former oppofitę,
And contrary as black to white;
Mere difparata, that concerning
Presbytery, this human learning;
Two things f'averfe, they never yet
But in thy rambling fancy met.
But I fhall take a fit occafion
T'evince thee by ratiocination,

Some other time in place more proper
Than this w'are in; therefore let's stop here,

And reft our weary'd bones a while,

Already tir'd with other toil.