EPIGRAMS

BY J. D.*

AD MUSAM. I.

FLY, merry Muse,† unto that merry town, Where thou mayst plays, revels, and triumphs

see;

* Epigrams by J. D.] MS. Harleian 1836 contains a collection of Epigrams, among which are found all the present Epigrams, with the exception of the 8th, 12th, 14th, 20th, 45th, 46th, 47th, and 48th. That MS. has helped me to several important corrections of the text, and in the 40th Epigram has supplied two lines which were necessary to complete a stanza. Though it is of a date considerably posterior to the first appearance in print of Epigrams by J. D., perhaps all the pieces which it exhibits are from the pen of Davies.

Some of these Epigrams are to be found among the Epigrams in Wit's Recreations: see the reprint of that work (1817) from a collation of eds. 1640-41-54-63.

↑ Muse] So eds.-MS. "newes."

and] So eds. -MS. "the."

§ love] So eds.-MS. "loues."

praise and love thee] Eds. (against the rhyme) "loue and praise thee."-MS. "seeme to love thee."

them which] So eds.-MS. "those that "

Oft in my laughing rhymes I name a gull;
But this new term will many questions breed;
Therefore at first I will express § at full,
Who is a true and perfect gull indeed.
A gull is he who fears a velvet gown,

And, when a wench is brave, dares not speak to her;

A gull is he which ** traverseth the town,
And is for marriage known a common wooer;
A gull is he which,†† when ‡‡ he proudly wears
A silver-hilted rapier by his side,

Endures the lie §§ and knocks about the ears, Whilst in his sheath his sleeping sword doth bide;

A gull is he which ¶¶ wears good handsome

clothes,

And stands in presence stroking up his hair,*** And fills +++ up his unperfect speech with oaths, But speaks not one wise word throughout the

year:

* taxeth] So eds.-MS. "carrieth."

+ particular] So eds. A, B; and MS.-Ed. C" pecu

liar."

will] So eds.-MS. "may." Therefore... express] So eds.-MS.

disclose."

[who] So eds.-MS. "that."

brave] i. e. fine, richly dressed. ** which] So eds.-MS. "that."

tt which] So eds.-MS. "that."

"Wherefore

It when] So MS.-Eds. "while" (but we have "Whilst" in the closing line of this stanza). §§ lie] So MS.-Eds. "lies."

Whilst] So eds.-MS. "While." TT which] So eds.-MS. "that." hair] So eds-MS. "heade." ttt Alls] So eds.-MS. "filleth."

A A

But, to define a gull in terms* precise,-
A gull is he which+ seems and is not wise.‡

IN RUFUM. III.

Rufus the courtier, at the theatre,

Leaving the best and most conspicuous place,
Doth either to the stage § himself transfer,

Or through a grate doth show his double T face,

For that the clamorous fry of** Inns of Court
Fills up the private rooms of greater++ price,
And such a place where all may have ‡‡ resort
He in his singularity doth despise.
Yet doth not his particular humour shun
The common stews and brothels of the town,
Though all the world in troops do§§ thither

run,

Clean and unclean, the gentle and the clown:
Then why should Rufus in his pride abhor
A common seat, that loves a common whore?

*terms] So eds.-MS. "words."

t which] So eds.-MS. "that."

is not wise] To this epigram there is an evident allusion in the following one;

"TO CANDIdus.

"Friend Candidus, thou often doost demaund
What humours men by gulling understand.
Our English Martiall hath full pleasantly
In his close nips describde a gull to thee:
I'le follow him, and set downe my conceit
What a gull is-oh, word of much receit !
He is a gull whose indiscretion
Cracks his purse-strings to be in fashion;
He is a gull who is long in taking roote

In barraine soyle where can be but small fruite;
He is a gull who runnes himselfe in debt
For twelue dayes' wonder, hoping so to get;
He is a gull whose conscience is a block,
Not to take interest, but wastes his stock;
He is a gull who cannot haue a whore,

But brags how much he spends upon her score;

He is a gull that for commoditie

Payes tenne times ten, and sells the same for three;
He is a gull who, passing finicall,
Peiseth each word to be rhetoricall;
And, to conclude, who selfe-conceitedly
Thinks al men guls, ther's none more gull then he."
Guilpin's Skialetheia, &c., 1598, Epig. 20.

§ either to the stage] See note ¶ on Epigram xxviii. through a grate] Malone has cited this passage (Shakespeare, by Boswell, iii. 81), and, if he explains it rightly, the allusion is to one of the two boxes (sometimes called private boxes) which were situated on each side of the balcony or upper stage.

double] So eds.-MS. "doubtfull." ** fry of] So eds.-MS. "cry of the." tt greater] So eds.-MS. " greatest."

I may have] So eds.-MS. "men may." $$ do] So eds.-MS. "did."

tinus. . . . Cuma, Pontinus."

Lesbia] So eds.-MS. "Lisba."

Rhodope] So eds. B, C; and MS -Ed. A "Rodpe." ** Staines] So eds.-MS. "Ware."

tt their lodging] So eds.-MS. "3 lodgings' 11 fell] So eds.-MS. "falle."

§§ their..... their] So eds.-Not in MS.

I dissolv'd] So MS.-Eds. "dissolues."

¶¶ rout] i. e. rabble, set.

*** thus] So eds.-MS. "first."

ttt discoursing] So eds.--MS. "discerninge."

Itt as] So eds.-MS. "so."

§§§ thus did] So eds.-MS. "straight would.

IN TITUM. VI.

Titus, the brave and valorous* young gallant, Three years together in this + town hath been; Yet my Lord Chancellor's tomb he hath not

seen,

Nor the new water-work, nor the elephant.
I cannot tell the cause without a smile,-
He hath been in the Counter all this ‡ while.

IN FAUSTUM. VII.

Faustus, nors lord nor knight, nor wise nor old,

To every place about the town doth ride;
He rides into the fields plays to behold,
He rides to take boat at the water-side,
He rides to Paul's, he rides to th' ordinary,
He rides unto the house of bawdry too,-
Thither his horse so often doth him¶ carry,
That shortly he will quite** forget to go.

For that he swears he hath four only swiv'd,
A maid, a wife,* a widow, and a whore:
Then, Liber, thou hast swiv'd all womenkind,
For a fifth sort, I know, thou canst not find.

IN MEDONTEM. X.

Great Captain Medon wears a chain of gold
Which at five hundred crowns is valued,
For that it was his grandsire's + chain of old,
When great King Henry Boulogne conquerèd.
And wear it, Medon, for it may ensue,
That thou, by virtue of this massy chain,
A stronger town than Boulogne mayst subdue,
If wise men's saws be not reputed § vain;
For what said Philip king of Macedon?
"There is no castle so well fortified,
But if an ass laden with gold come || on,
The guard will stoop, and gates fly open wide."

* valorous] So eds.-MS. "valient." this] So eds.-MS. "the."

this] So eds.-MS. "the."

§ nor] So MS.-Eds. "not."

Paul's] Eds. A, B, "Powles."-Ed. C "Paules."MS. "Powels." (But in Ep. xx. ed. A has "Paules"). ¶so often doth him] So ed. A.-Eds. B, C, "doth him so often."-MS. "so often him doth."

** quite] So eds. -Not in MS.

tt In Katam] This Epigram is not in MS.

I been in town, seven years] So ed. A.-Eds. B, C, "bin seauen years in towne."-MS. "knowen this towne 7 yeares."

IN QUINTUM.†† XII.

Quintus his wit‡‡ infus'd into his brain,
Mislikes the place, and fled into his feet;
And there it wanders up and down the street, §§
Dabbled in the dirt, and soaked in the rain.

Doubtless his wit intends not to aspire,
Which leaves his head, to travel in the mire.

* A maid, a wife] So eds.-MS. "A wife, a made."

+ grandsire's] So eds.-MS. "fathers."

virtue of this] So eds.-MS. "wearing of that." § reputed] So eds.-MS, "accounted." come] So MS.-Eds. "comes." rhymes] So eds.-MS. "lynes."

** grinn'st] So eds.-MS. "laughest."
tt In Quintum] This Epigram is not in MS.

1: Quintus his wit] i. e. Quintus's wit.
§§ street] Eds. "streetes."

AAS

IN SEVERUM. XIII.

The puritan Severus oft doth read

This text, that doth pronounce vain speech+

a sin,—

"That thing defiles a man, that doth proceed From out the mouth, not that which enters in."

Hence is it that we seldom hear him swear;
And thereof,|| like ¶ a Pharisee, he vaunts:
But he devours more capons in a** year
Than would suffice an++ hundred protestants.
And, sooth, those sectaries ‡‡ are gluttons all,
As well the thread-bare cobbler as the knight;
For those poor slaves which have not where-
withal,

Feed §§ on the rich, till they devour them quite; And so, like Pharaoh's kine, they eat up clean

Those that be fat, yet still themselves be ¶¶ lean.

"one.

Tlike] So Ed. A, and MS.-Eds. B, C, "as."
** a] So ed. A, and MS.-Eds. B, C,
tt an] So eds. B, C.-Ed. A "a."-MS. "one."
It those sectaries] So eds.-MS. "these scituaries."
§§ Feed] So eds.-MS. "Eate."

like] So ed. A, and MS.-Eds. B, C, "as."

¶¶ be fat, yet still themselves be] So eds.-MS. "are fatt,

yett they themselues are."

*** In Leucam] This Epigram is not in MS.

ttt forsook] So ed. A.-Eds. B, C, "refus'd."

ttt eke] So ed. A.-Eds. B, C, "then."

$$$ my glove"] Something has dropt out of this line.

quod] i. e. quoth.

¶¶¶ yet] So eds.-MS. "of."

IN COSMUM. XVII.

Cosmus hath more discoursing in his head
Than Jove when Pallas issu'd from his brain;
And still he strives to be delivered
Of all his thoughts at once; but all in vain;
For, as we see at all the ** playhouse-doors,
When ended is the play, the dance, and song,
A thousand townsmen, gentlemen, and whores,
Porters, and serving-men, together throng,-
So thoughts of drinking, thriving,++ wenching,
war,++

And borrowing money, ranging §§ in his mind,
To issue all at once so forward are,
As none at all can perfect passage find.

IN FLACCUM. XVIII.

The false knave Flaccus once a bribe I gave; The more fool I¶¶ to bribe so false a knave:

* harsh noise the air dost] So eds.-MS. (nonsensically)

"horse nor sea the ayre doth."

t words] So eds.-MS. "termes."

t a lion] So eds.-MS. "the lions."

§ Who from a] So eds.-MS." Which from the."

I doubt] So eds.-MS. "feare."

¶he] So eds. B, C; and MS.--Not in ed. A.

** at all the] So eds.-MS. "that att the."

†† drinking, thriving] So eds.—MS. "thrivinge, drinckinge."

11 wenching, war] So eds.-MS "wenchinge ware."

§§ ranging] So MS.-Eds. "raging."

at] So eds. B, C; and MS.-Ed. A "a" ¶¶ The more fool 1] So eds.-MS. "I was a foole."