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brought out at Padua, which consisted of one hundred virgins, one hundred soldiers, one hundred horsemen in iron armour, forty cornets of horse, six trumpeters on horseback, six drummers, six ensigns, six sack buts, six great flutes, six minstrels playing on Turkish instruments, six others on octave flutes, six pages, three serjeants, six cymbalists, twelve huntsmen, twelve grooms, six coachmen for the triumph, six others for the procession, two lions led by two Turks, two elephants by two others, and sundry two and four legged and nondescript beings to complete the list of the choristers. With the exception of the hundred virgins, which number for particular reasons they will be obliged materially to reduce, the committee propose to rival this celebrated display; and whereas Handel availed himself of kettle-drums and the firing of artillery, it is their intention to introduce upon the stage a company of Macadamisers, breaking up real stones with bona fide hammers, and to terminate with the explosion of two gasometers. If Amphion built up stones by music, it is surely allowable to break them to pieces to the same accompaniment; and men may easily be found to risk their lives in managing the explosion, if they be properly encouraged by small annuities to be doubled in case of death.
It has been thought by some that Handel pushed imitative harmony too far when he attempted to suggest by sound the creation of light and the mercy of Heaven, as well as the hopping of frogs and the buzzing of flies; while in Joshua he has endeavoured by the harmony of one long-extended note to express the arresting the great luminary of the universe, or in other words to make the audience hear the sun stand still. But the committee have engaged a composer who pledges himself to surpass all these exploits, and not only set a tooth-ache to music in such a manner that every one shall instantly recognise it as acutely as if it were in his own jaw, but distinctly to impress upon the ear the hypothenuse of a triangle, and excite a very lively impression, by sound alone, of the peculiar smell of the shape of a drum.
The lion in Hydaspes, that fought and fell to the accompaniment of the orchestra, has received his meed of praise in the thirteenth number of the Spectator; and a recent writer relates that in the Opera-house of San Moise at Venice, he heard the famous David sing a bravura during his combat with the Cretan Minotaur, towards the conclusion of which the monster expired. This song was constantly encored, and the Minotaur as constantly revived without ceremony, and fought and died over again, with increased vigour and proportionate acclamations. This too, admirable as it unquestionably is, will be eclipsed in a forthcoming serious opera, the name of which we are not at liberty to reveal, but from one of the passages we have, as a special favour, been kindly allowed to make a diminutive extract.
The scene represents a dark wood in all the murkiness of midnight, which will however be rendered distinctly visible from all parts of the house by means of additional lamps.-(Adagio movement to express that the moon is behind a cloud, but may shortly be expected to rise.) Enter Florello-whose speech we have translated into English for the benefit of country readers.
"No sound is heard." (Trombones, bassoons, &c. growl their lowest notes to imitate the profundity and depth of the silence.).
"No human form I see." (Here he stares earnestly at a numerous
and fashionable audience, who confirm his assertion with bravos and clapping of hands,)
"I falter--faint-my breath begins to flee." (Wind instruments to suggest his deficiency of breath, and express his want of expression.)
"With two stilettos in my heart I lie." (Adagio movement in F and G sharp. Florello puts his hand to his heart, and draws two sighs, but not one of the daggers. He rises-falls back against the stump of a tree, and the music expresses that he has torn his inexpressibles.)
"Unseen:" (Rubadub-dub) “Unheard :" (Tantara-ra) “Alone”(Jang-jang-crash) "I die-die-die!" (Diminuendo-Tweedledum! Tweedledum! Tweedledum! twee-we-ee !!!) And so the music and the hero die away together.
As this exquisitely pathetic scene will doubtless be encored, the second symphony is made to imitate the application of galvanism to the unfortunate defunct, who rises in the most natural convulsions, recommences, and comes to his end da capo; and as there is reason to apprehend that the whole of Fop's Alley will be delivered of a wailful whimper and simultaneous snivel, which might endanger the baldheads, of the fiddlers, women will be stationed in the pit with white cambric lachrymatories, to exchange for those which have become saturated with the tender tears of sympathy. Cafarelli said, that if Farinelli had not been de facto the prime minister of Spain, he well deserved it, for his voice was inimitable; and we maintain of our composer, that if he be not created first lord of the admiralty, he richly merits that station, for he is the first of imitative harmonists. Should any of the public fall asleep during the performance of his opera, it will be additional proof of his powers as a composer; and should they do the same while reading this paper, or be tempted to ejaculate " What stuff! what nonsense!" they are respectfully informed that the writer, who is not less loyal than musical, has no wish to realise the assertion of Pope :
"That soon, ah soon, rebellion will commence,
Meeting the same People.
COLONEL Nightingale sat in deep meditation in his drawing-room in Albemarle-street, pondering over the Morning Chronicle, and endeavouring to comprehend the merits of the suits and cross-suits Waters v. Ebers, and vice versa, and Benelli v. the same, and vice versa: not to mention a host of Garcia's, De Begnis', and Signor Di Giovanni's similarly circumstanced. "And so it seems," said his lady, who at the same time perused the Morning Post, "that the annual expense of the Opera amounts to between sixty and eighty thousand pounds." "And dog-cheap too," answered the Colonel. "I should not be surprised," said the lady," if the Opera were not to open this season.” "Impos sible!" exclaimed the Colonel with an involuntary shudder. "Sad news from St. Petersburg!" said the lady, still perusing the Morning Post. "Very sad " answered the Colonel, still intent upon the Morning Chronicle. "The Neva has risen forty feet," said the lady.
"And opera-boxes forty pounds," said the Colonel. "The loss of tallow is incalculable," said the lady. "The central chandelier is lighted by gas," said the Colonel." And what a loss of lives!" ejaculated the lady. "Poor Naldi!" sighed the Colonel; "he lost his life by poking over a stew-pan." "It seems, the Emperor has been most humanely attentive to the sufferers."-"Yes, but where will he get such another Leporello ?"
This sentimental colloquy was interrupted by the entrance of a servant, who presented to Mrs. Nightingale, upon a silver waiter, with his thumb cautiously wound up in a napkin, the following document:
"Mr. and Mrs. Wendover present their compliments to Colonel and Mrs. Nightingale, and request the honour of their company to dinner on Thursday the 13th instant, at six o'clock.
Monday, 3 January."
"What! at it again!" exclaimed Colonel Nightingale. "Well! those Wendovers are the most persevering people I ever encountered: they never will let us alone: they must have a comfortable notion of their own attractions, to suppose that we can find any delight in bowling all the way from Albemarle-street to Russell-square. I hate Russellsquare, with its erect bronze Duke of Bedford, looking up towards Bloomsbury-square after his recumbent bronzed friend Fox. Poor Charles! only think of making him, at his time of life, sit down on a white marble sofa bare-headed in the open air! The last time I saw him he had a lap full of snow."-"My dear," said Mrs. Nightingale, "the Wendovers are not responsible for what happened to be cast in metal ten years before they entered the square. You know I had no horses at Cheltenham, and Mrs. Wendover's carriage was always at my disposal."—"Ay, there it is," answered her helpmate: "Mrs. Wendover makes a good thing of that carriage: she is always lying in wait, seeking what people of fashion she may devour: no sooner is one's wife caught without one's horses than in trots Mrs. Wendover with her two long-legged seducers. To my certain knowledge she has already currycombed herself into three houses in Berkeley-square, and now she is creeping up Albemarle-street: somebody ought to put a checkstring on such doings-it's a shame thus to prey on the necessities of the great! But I have a still deeper-rooted objection to dining with the Wendovers. One always meets the same people there: I hate the same people company is like fish-good for nothing after the first day."
Mrs. Nightingale was a prudent wife. Like the Chain-Pier at Brighton, she made it a rule never to oppose a storm. Look at the consequence: that edifice has stood firm during the late gales, where Waterloo-bridge would have gone by the board; and Mrs. Nightingale, on the day which followed the above-recited colloquy, was authorised to write an answer to Mrs. Wendover, undertaking to accept the invitation, in a phraseology similar to that in which it was couched, with the omission of the "compliments," those articles, at that season of the year, being confined to watchmen and parish-beadles in quest of halfcrowns. The Wendover card stood palpable in the chimney-rack, and it was, rather unluckily, printed in huge bulbous characters, insomuch that it caught the Colonel's eye every morning, at breakfast. heartily wish," said the lord of the mansion, one morning, whilst in the Vol. IX. No. 50.-1825.
act of spreading butter on a parallelogram of dried toast, “ that among all these new joint stock-companies, some patriotic banker or disinterested solicitor would establish a New Grand Dining-out Company, with a capital of a few millions to purchase a gigantic lottery-wheel."—“ A gigantic lottery-wheel, my dear! for Heaven's sake, for what purpose?"
"Why to shake London dinner-company in, that one might avoid the chance of meeting the same people twice. I am confident it would answer. I should have no objection to be 'standing counsel' to the concern. I flatter myself I could give them some profitable hints.”— "I doubt whether it would always answer," said Mrs. Nightingale : "shuffle them as you will, dinner-people, like hands at whist, sometimes come together again in a most unaccountable way. You observed last night at Lady Lumley's, I held the knave, ten, and four of diamonds. Before the next deal Sir Samuel Spadille shuffled the cards extremely well, and afterwards stuck them in, heads and feet, in a complete higgledy-piggledy style. Notwithstanding which I held the very same knave, ten, and four at the very next round."-"That I don't object to," resumed the husband: "that 's all chance: I myself entered the pit of the Opera, three successive nights, and found Lindley screwing the same peg of his violincello, But inviting one to meet the same people is malice prepense."-" They may now and then have casually dropped in," said the lady." Phu !" ejaculated the Colonel," nobody, now-a-days, drops casually in to a gentleman's dining room, unless it be a stray sweep that has mistaken his chimney."
On the appointed day, Colonel and Mrs. Nightingale set off from Albemarle-street towards Russell square. It's a long way for the same pair," said the Colonel : "would it not be better to change horses in Tottenham-court Road? It's all very well (a phrase uniformly adopted by the Colonel when he meant that any event was in every particular decidedly bad)" It 's all very well: but another time you won't catch me dining out so far North: these kind of expeditions ought to be left to Captain Parry."-" True," answered his helpmate, endeavouring to combat his sentiments by burlesquing them: "I confess they do live a lamentable long way North. I should not be surprised if we met a parcel of Esquimaux, and were obliged to touch noses."—"I hope we shall," said the Colonel: "that, at all events, will not be meeting the same people. Your mention of the Esquimaux," said the husband, as the carriage crossed Bedford-square, "reminds me of an anecdote of the late Lord Erskine. A lady was listening to that nobleman's account of the people at the North Pole, and when he had mentioned that the natives clothe themselves in the skins of the seals and eat their flesh-What, live upon the seals?' exclaimed the lady with a look of horror. Yes, Madam,' answered Lord Erskine, and devilish good living too, if one could but keep them.'" The Colonel's monolaugh at his own facetiousness had barely subsided, when the carriage stopped at a mansion in Russell-square. "Really I don't think this is the house," said Mrs. Nightingale, as they entered the drawing-room; "the Wendovers' drawing-room furniture is blue." They may have changed it to crimson," said the Colonel: "it would be too much always to meet the same furniture with the same people."-Nobody happened to be in the room except a pretty dark-eyed little girl, of about eight years of age, who sat upon the sofa in a diagonal position, with her legs coiled
under her, reading Sandford and Merton. "Am I right, my dear," said Mrs. Nightingale, addressing the child: "what is your name?" "Caroline, Ma'am."-" And what besides ?"-" Stanfield."-"Is this your papa's house ?”—“Yes.”—“There,” cried the lady, turning to her husband, "I thought we were wrong." At this moment Mrs, Stanfield entered the rooni. Suitable apologies were made and accepted and Mrs. Stanfield informed the intruders that the Wendovers lived next door; adding, with a smile, "They are strangers to us; but we have both dinner-parties to-day, and I suppose our servants took it for granted that you were some of our guests."
"Ah, my dear Julia," said the mortified Colonel, as they ascended the real genuine unadulterated staircase of Mr. and Mrs. Wendover, "what an opening have I let slip of passing a pleasant evening! one never thinks of things until it is too late. What a beautiful opportunity have I suffered to evaporate!"-" An opportunity for what?" inquired the anxious Mrs. Nightingale. "For what!" ejaculated the Colonel : "Oh, Heavens! I might have said to Mrs. Stanfield, 'Let Mrs. Nightingale and myself stay where we are; and do you, Madam, order the first married couple that drives up, to take our place at the Wendover dinner-table. You don't visit in the same circles: they will thus, as well as we, be able to escape the calamity of meeting the same people, and you will make two virtuous couples happy,” ”
APPROACHING DOWNFAL OF THE GOLDEN CALF.
"The lowness of interest, in all other countries a sign of wealth, is with us a proof of misery. Hence the dearuess of necessaries of life; hence our increase of building in this city, because workmen have nothing to do but to employ one another, and one half of them are infallibly undone.”—SWIFT.
"WHEN the Christians of Alexandria received the penal edicts of the Emperor Theodosius against the sacrifice and worship of the Pagan superstition, they immediately proceeded with a fanatical fury to carry the sentence into execution by demolishing the great Temple of Serapis. It was constructed with great strength and massy materials, and the doors being of solid brass, resisted for a very long time the fury of the assailants: in the end, however, they were burst open, and the colossal statue of Serapis discovered to view. It was an extraordinary achievement of art; and the magnitude of the figure, and the majesty of his aspect, for a moment overawed his assailants. He was seated on a throne, and seemed to fill the whole temple; in his left hand he held a sceptre; in his right a symbolic monster. It was believed by many in the crowd, that if any impious hand dared to insult the god, the heavens and the earth would instantly return to their original chaos. This, with the sublime greatness of the statue, and the awful obscurity in which he was throned within the spacious building, had for some time the effect of restraining their impetuosity. But a zealous soldier at last ventured into the sanctuary, armed with a weighty battle-axe; a profound silence ensued, as if every one expected some terrific event. The soldier, however, was undaunted, and struck the statue on the cheek with so much vigour that the plate of metal of which it consisted started off, and fell to the ground with a clang that echoed throughout the building. The multitude shouted; the victorious