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Sangling after me every where, like a tantony I wish I was a maid again, pig ): find some other road, can't you; and And in my own country.
[Erit. Hon't keep wherreting me with your nonsense, Scene IV.-A Green, with the Prospect of Madge. Nay, pray you, Hodge, stay, and
a Village, and the Representation of a et me speak to you a bit.
Statute or Fair. Hodge. Well; what sayn you?
Madge. Dear beart, how can you be so Enter Justice Woodcock, HAWTHORN, Mrs. barbarous? and is this the way you serve me
DEBORAH Woodcock, LUCINDA, ROSETTA, ifter all; and won't you keep your word, Hodge? young MEADOWS, Hodge, and several
Hodge. Why po I won't, I tell you; I have country People. -hang'
Hodge. This way, your worship, this way. Madge. Nay but surely, surely Consider Why don't you stand aside there? Here's his lodge, you are obligated in conscience to worship a coming. make me an honest woman.
Countrymen. His worship! Hodge. Obligated in conscience! How am Jus. W. Fie, fie, what a crowd's this! Odd, I obligated ?
I'll put some of them in the stocks. [Striking Madge. Because you are; and none but the a Fellow) Stand out of the way, sirrah. vasest of rogues would bring a poor girl to Haw. For shame, neighbour. Well, my lad, bame, and afterwards leave her to the wide are you willing to serve the king? world.
Countryman. Why, can you list me? Serve Hodge. Bring you to shame! Don't make the king, master? no, no, I pay the king, that's me speak, Madge; don't make me speak. enough for me. Ho, ho, ho! Nadge. Yes do, speak your worst.
Haw. Well said, Sturdy-boots. Hodge. Why then, if you go to that, you Jus. W. Nay, if you talk to them, they'll were fain to leave your own village down in answer you. he west, for a bastard you had by the clerk Haw. I would have them do so, I like they of the parish, and I'll bring the man shall say should.-Well, madam, is not this a fine sight? I to your face.
I did not know my neighbour's estate bad Madge. No, no, Hodge, 'tis no such thing, been so well peopled.- Are all these his own tis a base lie of farmer Ploughshare's—But I tenants ? know what makes you false-hearted to me, Mrs. D. More than are good of them, Mr. that you may keep company with young ma- Hawthorn. I don't like to see such a parcel dam's waiting-woman; and I am sure she's of young hussies fleering with the fellows. no fit body for a poor man's wife.
Haw. There's a lass. [Beckoning to a Hodge. How should you know what she's country Girl]-Come bither, my prolly maid. Gt for. She's fit for as much as you, may- What brings you here? [Chucking her under bap; don't find fault with your betters, Madge. the Chin] Do you come to look for a service ?
Country G. Yes, an't please you.
Haw. Well, and what place are you for? Ob! master Thomas, I have a word or two Country G. All work, an't please you. to say to you; pray did not you go down the Jus. W. Ay, ay, I don't doubt it; any work village one day last week with a basket of you'll put her to. something upon your shoulder?
Mrs. D. She looks like a brazen one- -Go, Young M. Well, and what then?
hussy. Hodge. Nay, not much, only the hostler at Haw. Here's another. (Catching a Girl that The Greenman was saying, as how there was goes by] What health, what bloom!- This a passenger at their house as see'd you go by, nature's work; no art, no daubing. Don't be and said he know'd you; and axt'a mort of asham'd, child; those cheeks of thine are enough questions So I thought I'd tell you. to put a whole drawing-room out of counte
Young M. The devil! ask questions about nance. me! I know nobody in this part of the coun- Hodge. Now, your honour, now the sport try; there must be some mistake in it.-Come will come: The gut-scrapers are here, and hither, Hodge.
[Erit with Hodge. some among them are going to sing and dance. Madge. Å nasty, ungrateful fellow, to use Why there's not the like of our statute, mun, me at this rate, after being to him as I have.- in five counties; others are but fools to it. Well, well, I wish all poor girls would take Servant-man. Come, good people, make a warning by my mishap, and never have nothing ring; and stand out, fellow servants, as many lo say to none of them.
of you as are willing, and able, to bear a bob ?). We'll let my masters and mistresses
can do something at least; if they How happy were my days, till now! won't hire us, it sban't be our fault. Strike I ne'er did sorrow feel;
the Servants' Medley. I rose with joy to milk any cow,
MEDLEY and CHORUS. Or turn my spinning-wheel.
pray ye, gentles, list to me: My heart was lighter than a fly,
I'm young, and strong, and clean, you see:
I'll not turn tail to any she,
For work that's in the county.
Of all your house the charge I take,
I wash, I scrub, I brew, I bake; Oh the fool, the silly, silly fool,
And more can do than here l'll speak, Who Irusts what man may be;
Depending on your bounty. 1) SL Anthony's pig.
1) To take a part in the song.
Footm. Behold a blade, who knows his trade Luc. My father, and my aunt !
Eust. The devil! What shall we do?
Luc. Take no notice of them, only obserne
A footman would you have, word, sir, I don't know wbat to say to it,
; On a message I can go,
but, if you'll sit down a moment, I dare swear And slip a billet-doux,
he will return-[Pretends to see the Justice] With your humble servant, madam. -0! sir, here is my papa! Cookm. Who wants a good cook, my hand Jus. W. Here is your papa, bussy! Who's they must cross;
this you have got with you? Hark you, sitrab, For plain wholesome dishes I'm ne'er at a loss; who are you, ye dog ? and wbat's your busiAnd what are your soups, your ragouts, and ness here? your sauce,
Eust. Sir, this is a language I am not used to. Compard to the beef of old England,
Jus. W. Don't answer me, you rascal-| 25 Compar'd to old English roast beef? a justice of the peace; and if I hear a word Cart. If
you want a young man, with a out of your mouth, I'll send you to jail, for true honest heart,
all your lac'd hat. Who knows how to manage a plough and a Árs. D. Send bim to jail, brother, ibat's right cart,
Jus. W. And how do you know it's right Here's one for your purpose, come take me How should you know any thing's rigti?
Sister Deborah, you are never in the right You'll say you ne'er met with a better nor I. Mrs. D. Brother, this is the map I have beec
Ge bo, Dobbin, etc. telling you about so long. Chorus. My masters and mistresses, bither Jus. W. What man, goody Wiseacre? repair;
Mrs. D. Why the man your daughter basi What servants you want, you'll find in our fair; an intrigue with: but I hope you will not beMen and maids fit for all sorts of stations lieve it now, though you see it with your owi there be;
eyes—Come, hussy, consess, and don't let your And, as for the wages, we shan't disagree. father make a fool of himself any longer.
Luc. Confess what, aunt? This gentleman ACT II.
is a music-master: he goes about the country, Scene I. – A Parlour in JUSTICE Wood-teaching ladies to play and sing; and has beez Cock's House.
recommended to instruct me; I could not tam
him out when he came to offer his service; Enter LUCINDA and EUSTACE. and did not know what answer to give his Luc. Well, am I not a bold adventurer, to till I saw my papa. bring you into my
falber's house at noon-day? Jus. W. Å music-master? Though, to say the truth, we are safer here Eust. Yes, sir, that's my profession. than in the garden; for there is not a human Mrs. D. It's a lie, young man; it's a lie. creature under the roof besides ourselves. Brother, he is no more a music-masler, thas Eust
. Then why not put our scheme into I am a music-master. execution this moment?'I have a post-chaise Jus. W. What then you know better than ready.
the fellow himself, do you ? and you will be Luc. Fie: how can you talk so lightly? I wiser than all the world ? protest I am afraid to have any thing to do Mrs. D. Brother, he does not look like a with you; and my aunt Deborah says
music-master. Eust. What! by all the rapture my heart Jus. W. He does not look! ha! ha! ha! now feels
Was ever such a poor stupe! Well, and what Luc. Ob, to be sure, promise and vow; it does he look like, then? 'But I suppose poa sounds preltily, and never fails to impose upon mean he is not dressed like a music-master
. a fond female.
Why, you silly wretch, these whipper-snappers Eust. Well, I see you've a mind to divert set up for gentlemen now-a-days, and give yourself with me; but I wish I could prevail themselves as many airs as if they were people on you to be a little serious.
of quality. – Hark you, friend, I suppose Luc. Seriously then, what would you desire you don'i come within the vagrant act? You me to say? I have promised to run away with have some settled habitation-'Where do you you; which is as great a concession as any live? reasonable lover can expect from his mistress. Mrs. D. It's an easy matter for him to tell
Eust. Ycs; but, you dear provoking angel, you a wrong place. you have not told me when
Jus. W. Sister Deborah, don't provoke me.
Mrs. D. I wish, brother, you would let me Luc. Why that, I confess, requires some examine him a little. consideration.
Jus. W. You shan't say a word to him, you Eust. Yet remember, while you are deliber- shan't say a word to hini. ating, the season, now so favourable to us, Mrs.
D. She says he was recommended bere, may elapse, never to return.
brother; ask him by wbom. Enter JUSTICE WOODCOCK and Mrs. Debo- desire it.
Jus. W. No, I won't now, because you RAH Woodcock.
Luc. If my papa did ask the question, sust, Jus. W. Hoity-loity; who have we bere? it would be very easily resolved.
will run away
Mrs. D. Who bid you speak, Mrs. Nimble- Then hoity-toity, lops ? I suppose the man has a tongue in Whisking, frisking, s head to answer for himself.
Green was her gown upon the grass ; Jus. W. Will nobody stop that prating old Oh! such were the joys of our dancing days. oman's mouth for me? Get out of the room. Eust. Very well, sir, upon my word. Mrs. D. Well, so I can, brother; I don't Jus. W. No, no, I forget all those things ant to stay: but, remember, I tell you, you now; but I could do a little at them once;ill make yourself ridiculous in this affair: Well, slay and eat your dinner, and we'll ir through your own obstinacy, you will have talk about your teaching the girl-Lucy, take our daughter run away with, before your face. your master to your spinnet, and show him Jus. W. My daughier! who will run away what you can do-I must go and give some ith my daughter?
orders; then boity-loity, etc.
Exit. Mrs. D. That fellow will.
Luc. My sweet, preliy papa, your most obeJus. W. Go, go, you are a wicked, censo- dient humble servant; ha, ha, ha! was ever jous woman.
so whimsical an accident? Well, sir, what do Luc. Why sure, madam, you must think you think of this ? 1e very forward, indeed.
Eust. Think of it! I am in amaze. Jus. W. Ay, she judges of others by herself; Luc. O your awkwardness! I was frightenremember when she was a girl, her mother ed out of my wils, lest you should not take ared not trust her the length of her apron- the hint; and, if I had not turned matters so Iring; she was clambering upon every fel- cleverly, we should have been utterly undone. ow's back.
Eust. 'Sdeath! why would you bring me Mrs. D. I was not.
into the house? we could expect nothing else: Jus. W. You were.
besides, since they did surprise us, it would Luc. Well, but why so violent?
have been better to have discovered the truth.
Luc. Yes, and never have seen one another
afterwards. I know my father better than you, Believe me, dcar aunt,
do; he has taken it into his head I have no If you rave thus and rant,
inclination for a husband; and let me tell you You'll never a lover persuade; that is our best security; for if once he bas The men will all fly,
said a thing, he will not be easily persuaded And leave you to die,
to the contrary. Oh, terrible chance! an old maid.
Eust. And pray what am I to do now? How happy the lass,
Luc. Why, as I think all danger is pretty Must she come in this pass,
well over, since he hath invited you to dinner Who ancient virginity 'scapes !
with him, stay; only be cautious of your be"Twere better on earth
haviour; and, in the mean time, I will consiHave five brats at a birth,
der what is next to be done. Than in bell be a leader of apes.
Eust. Had not I better go to your father? [Erit' Mrs. D. Luc. Do so, while I endeavour to recover
myself a liule out of the flurry this affair has Jus. W. Well done, Lucy, send her about put me in.
[Exeunt her business; a troublesome, foolish creature, does she think I want to be directed by her!
SCENE II.-A Garden, - Come hither, my lad, you look tolerable Enter Rosetta, musing. honest.
Ros. If ever poor crcature was in a pitiable Eust. I hope, sir, I shall never give you condition, surely I am. The devil take this cause to alter your opinion.
fellow, I cannot get him out of my head; and Jus. W. No, no, I'am not easily deceived, yet I would fain persuade myself I don't care I am generally pretty right in my conjectures. for him: well, but surely lam not in love: - You must know, I had once a little notion let me examine my heart a little: I saw him of music myself, and learned upon the fiddle; kissing one of the maids the other day ; I could I could play the Trumpet Minuet, and But- bare boxed his ears for it, and have done tered Peas, and two or three tunes. I remem-nothing but find Sault and quarrel with the ber, when I was in London, about thirty years girl ever since. Why was I uncasy at his ago, there was a song, a great favourite at ioying with another woman? what was it to our club at Nando's Coffee-house; Jack Pickle me? Then I dream of him almost every night used to sing it for us, a droll fish! but 'lis an-but that may proceed from his being gene, old thing, lodare swear you have heard of it rally uppermost in my thoughts all day : Oh!
worse and worse!- Well, "he is certainly a AIR.
pretty lad; be bas something uncommon about When I followed a lass that was froward him, considering his rank:— And now let me and shy,
only, put the case, if he was not a servant, Ob! I stuck to her stuff, till I made her would 1, or would I not, prefer him to all the comply;
men I ever saw? Why, to be sure, if he was Oh! I took her so lovingly round the waist, not a servant — In short, I'll ask myself no And I smack'd her lips and held her fast: more questions, for the further I examine, the When hugg'd and baul'd,
less reason I shall have to be satisfied. She squeal'd and squallid; But, though she vow'd all I did was in vain, Yet I pleas'd her so well that she bore it How bless'd the maid, whose bosom again :
No headstrong passion knows ;
Her days in joy she passes,
Ros. When things are not fit,
We should calmly submit; Where'er her fancy leads her,
No cure in reluctance we find: No pain, no fear invades ber;
Young M. Then thus I obey,
Tear your image away;
And banish you quite from my From every object flows.
Ros. Well, now I think I am somewhat Enter Young MEADOWS.
easier: I am glad I have come to this explaYoung M. Do you come into the garden, nation with him, because it puts an end to Mrs. Rosetla, to put my lilies and roses out things at once. of countenance; or, to save me the trouble of Young M. Hold, Mrs. Rosetta, pray stay : watering my flowers, by reviving them? The moment--The airs this girl gives' berself are sun seems to bave hid himself a little, to give intolerable: I find now the cause of her beyou an opportunity of supplying his place. haviour; she despises the meanness of my con
Ros. Where could he get that now? he dition, thinking a gardener below the notice never read it in the Academy of Compliments. of a lady's waiting-woman; 'sdeath, I have a
Young M. Corne, don't affect to treat me good mind to discover myself to her. with contempt; I can suffer any thing belter Ros. Poor wretch! he does not know what than that. In short, I love you; there is no to make of it: I believe he is beartily mortimore to be said: I am angry with myself for fied, but I must not pity bim. it, and strive all I can against it; but, in spite Young M. It shall be so: I will discover of myself, I love you.
myself to her, and leave the bouse directlyRos. Really, Mr. Thomas, this is very im- Mrs. Rosetta-[Starting back) --Plague on it, proper language; it is what I don't understand; yonder's the justice come into the garden! I can't suffer it, and, in short, I don't like it. Ros. O Lord! he will walk round this way:
Young M. Perhaps you don't like me? pray go about your business; I would not for Ros. Well, perhaps I don't.
ibe world he should see us together. Young M. Nay, but 'tis not so; come, con- Young M. The devil take him; he's gone sess you love me.
across the parterre, and can't hobble here this Ros. Confess! indeed I shall confess no such half hour: I must and will have a little conthing: besides, to what purpose should I con- versation with you. fess it?
Ros. Some other time. Young M. Why, as you say, I don't know Young M. This evening, in the greenhouse, to what purpose; only, it would be a satis- at the lower end of the canal; I have some faction to me to hear you say so; that's all. thing to communicate to you of importance
Ros. Wby, if I did love you, I can assure Will you meet me there? you, you would never be the better for it Ros. Meet/you! Women are apt enough to be weak! we can- Young M. Ay; I have a secret to tell you, not always answer for our inclinations, but it and I swear, from that moment, there sball be is in our power not to give way to them; an end of every thing betwist us. and if I was so silly, I say if I was so indis- Ros. Well, well, pray leave me now. creet, which I hope I am not, as to entertain Young M. You'll come iben? an improper regard, when people's circum- Ros. I don't know, perhaps
may. stances are quite unsuitable, and there are Young M. Nay, but promise. obstacles in the way that cannot be surmounted- Ros. What signifies promising; I may break
Young M. Oh! to be sure, Mrs. Rosella, to my promise—but, I tell you, I will. be sure: you are entirely in the right of it, Young M. Enough-Yet, before I leave you 1-know well
you and I can never come let me desire you to believe, I love you more together.
than ever man loved woman; and that we Ros. Well then, since that is the case, as I relinquish you, I give up all that can make I assure you it is, I tbink we had better be- my life supportable. have accordingly.
Young M. Suppose we make a bargain, then, never to speak to one another any more? Oh! how shall I, in language weak, Ros. With all my heart.
My ardent passion tell; Young M. Nor look at, nor if possible think Or form my falt'ring tongue to speak of, one another?
That cruel word, farewell? Ros. I am very willing.
Farewell—but know, though ihus we part, Young M. And as long as we stay in the My thoughts can never stray: house together, never to take any notice? Go where I will, my constant heart Ros. It is the best way.
Must with my charmer slay. [Eru Young M. Why, I believe it is-Well, Mrs. Rosetta
Enter JUSTICE WOODCOCK,
Ros. What can this be that he wants to DUET T.
tell me? I bave a strange curiosity to hear it. Ros. Be gone—I agree;
Already, the matter I've sworn: Ros, So, I thought the devil would throw Young M. Yet let me co
him in my way; now for a courtship of: Of the fates that ordain- different kind; but I'll give hina a serleitA trial so hard to be borne. you call me, sir?
Jus. W. Ay, where are you running so fast? Ros. Won't you, sir?
Jus. W. Well, but come here ; come here, Ros. But won't you indeed, sir ?
Ros. Ha, ha, ha! Ros. Thank you, sir, pretty well.
Jus. W. Hussy, bussy! Jus. W. Why you look as fresh and bloomy Ros. Ha, ha, ha!- Your servant, sir, your to-day-Adad, you little slut, I believe you are servant.
Jus. W. Why, you impudent, audaciousRos. () sir! you are pleased to compliment. Jus. W. Adad, I believe you are -- let me try
Enter Hawthorn. Ros. Lord, sir!
Haw. So, so, justice at odds with gravity! Jus. W. What brings you into this garden his worship playing at romps!- Your servant, so often, Rosetta? I hope you don't get eating sir. green fruit and trash; or have you å hanker- Jus. W. Ha! friend Hawthorn! ing after some lover in dowlass, who spoils Haw. I hope I don't spoil sport, neighbour: my trees by engraving truelovers'-knots on them, I thought I had the glimpse of a petticoat as with your horn- and buck-handled knives? 1 I came in here. see your name written upon the ceiling of the Jus. W. Oh! the maid. Ay, she has been servants’-ball, with the smoke of a candle; gathering a sallad-But come hither, master and I suspect,
Hawthorn, and I'll show you some alterations Ros. Not me, I hope, sir-No, sir, I am of I intend to make in my garden. another guess mind,
assure you; for I have Haw. No, no, I am no judge of it; besides, beard say, men are false and fickle
I want to talk to you a little more about this Jus. Ay, that's your flaunting, idle, - Tell me, sir Justice, were you helping your young fellows; so they are: and they are so maid to gather a sallad here, or consulting damn'd impudent, I wonder a woman will her taste in your improvements, eh? Ha, ha, have any thing to say to them; besides, all ha! Let me see, all among the roses; 'egad, I that they want is something to brag of, and like your notion : but you look a little blank tell again.
it: you are ashamed of the business then, Ros. Why I own, sir, if ever I was to make are you? a slip, it should be with an elderly gentleman
AIR. -about seventy, or seventy-five years of age.
Jus. W. No, child, that's out of reason; Oons! neighbour, ne'er blush for a trifle though I have known many a man turned of
like this; threescore with a hale constitution,
What harm with a fair one to toy and to Ros. Then, sir, he should be troubled with
kiss ? the gout, have a good, strong, substantial, The greatest and gravest--a truce with griwinter cough-and I should not like him the
mace worse-ishe had a small touch of the rheumatism. Would do the same thing, were they in the Jus. W. Pho, pho, Rosetta, this is jestimg.
same place. Ros. No, sir; every body has a taste, and
No age, no profession, no station is free; I have mine. Jus. W. Well but, Rosetta, have you thought
To sovereign beauty mankind bends the knee: of what I was saying to you?
That power, resistless, no strength can oppose,
We all love a pretty girl-under the rose. Ros. What was it, sir?
Jus. W. Ab, you know, you know well Jus. W. I profess, master Hawthorn, this is enough, hussy.
all Indian, all Cherokee language to me; I Ros. Dear sir, consider what has a poor don't understand a word of it. servant to depend on but her character? And Haw. No, may be not: well, sir, will you I have heard you gentlemen will talk one thing read this letter, and try whether you can unbefore, and another after.
derstand that it is just brought by a serrant, Jus. W. I' tell you again, these are the idle, who stays for an answer. flashy, young dogs: but when you have to do Jus. İ. A letter, and to me? [Taking the with a staid, sober man
Letter] Yes, it is to me; and yet I am sure Ros. And a magistrate, sir?
it comes from no correspondent that I know Jus. W. Right; it's quite a different thing of. Where are my spectacles? not but I can -Well, shall we, Roseita, shall we? see very well without them, master Hawthorn; Ros. Really, sir, I don't know wbat to say but this seems to be a sort of a crabbed hand.
Sir,-I am nshamed of giving you this Young I am, and sore afraid :
trouble ; but I am 'informed there is an Would you hurt a harmless maid? unthinking boy, a son of mine, now disLead an innocent astray?
guised and in your service, in the capacity Tempt me not, kind sir, I pray.
of a gardener:-Tom is a little wild, but
an honest lad, and no fool either, though Men too often we believe;
I am his father that say it. Tom-ob, this Aud, should you my faith deceive, is Thomas, our gardener; I always thought Ruin first, and then forsake,
that he was a better man's child than he apSure my tender beart would break.
peared to be, though I never mentioned it. Jus. W: Why, you silly girl, I won't do Haw. Well, well, sir, pray let's hear the
rest of the letter.
you any barm.