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Inkle. Our language! Trudge. Zounds, she has thrown me into a cold sweat.
Yarico. Hark! I heard a noise! Wowski, awake! whence can it proceed?
[She wakes Wowski, and they both come forward Yarico towards Inkle; Wowski towards Trudge.
Yar. Ah! what form is this?-are you a man? Inkle. True flesh and blood, my charming heathen, I promise you.
Yar. What harmony in his voice! what a shape! How fair his skin too!- [Gazing.
Trudge. This must be a lady of quality, by her staring.
Yar. Say, stranger, whence come you? Inkle. From a far distant island; driven on this coast by distress, and deserted by my companions.
Yar. And do you know the danger that surrounds you here? our woods are filled with beasts of prey-my countrymen, too(yet, I think they couldn't find the heart)might kill you. It would be a pity if you fell in their way I think I should weep if you came to any harm.
Trudge. O ho! it's time, I see, to begin making interest with the chambermaid. [Takes Wowski apart. Inkle. How wild and beautiful! sure, there's magic in her shape, and she has rivetted me to the place. But where shall I look for safety? let me fly, and avoid my death.
decked in silks, my brave maid, and have a
Inkle. No, our only danger, on land, is here.
Nor shrink from the tempest, nor dread the big thunder:
While constant, we'll laugh at a
changes of weather,
And journey, all over the world, both together.
Trudge. Why, you speak English as wel as I, my little Wowski."
Trudge. Iss! and you learnt it from a strange man, that tumbled from a big boat, many moons ago, you say!
Wows. Iss-teach me-teach good many, Trudge. Then, what the devil made 'em se surpris'd at seeing us! was he like me? [ca Yar. Oh! no-But-[as if puzzled] well shakes her head] Not so smart a body, maythen, die stranger, but, don't depart. But I hap. Was his face, now, round, and come, will try to preserve you; and if you are kill-and-eh! [Stroking his chin] Was it lite ed, Yarico must die too! Yet, 'tis I alone can save you your death is certain without my Wows. Like dead leaf-brown and shrive. assistance; and indeed, indeed, you shall not Trudge. Oh, oh, an old shipwrecked sailer, want it. I warrant. With white and grey hair, my pretty beauty spot? Wows. Iss; all white.
Inkle. My kind Yarico! what means, then, must be used for my safety?
Yar. My cave must conceal you: none enter he put it in pocket.
When night come,
it, since my father was slain in battle. I will Trudge. Oh! wore a wig. But the old boy bring you food, by day, then lead you to our taught you something more than English, unfrequented groves, by moonlight, to listen to the nightingale. If you should sleep, I'll watch you, and wake you when there's danger. Inkle. Generous maid! then, to you I will owe my life; and whilst it lasts, nothing shall part us.
Yar. And shan't it, shan't it indeed? Inkle. No, my Yarico! for, when an opportunity offers to return to my country, you shall be my companion.
Yar. What! cross the seas!
Inkle. Yes. Help me to discover a vessel, and you shall enjoy wonders. You shall be
Trudge. The devil he did! What was it' Wows. Teach me put dry grass, red a in hollow white stick.
Trudge. Aye, what was that for?
Trudge. And what became of him at last What did your countrymen do for the pos fellow?
Wows. Eat him one day-Our chief kill
Trudge. Mercy on us! what damned sto- a little after their spouses. Well, as my master machs, to swallow a tough old tar! though, seems king of this palace, und has taken his for the matter of that, there's many of our Indian queen already, I'll e'en be usher of the captains would eat all they kill, I believe! Ah, black rod here. But you have had a lover or poor Trudge! your killing comes next. two in your time; eh, Wowski? Wows. Oh iss-great many-I tell you.
Wows. No, no-not you-no
[Running to him. Trudge. No? why what shall I do, if I get
in their paws?
Wows. I fight for you!
Trudge. Will you? ecod she's a brave,!
White man, never go away-
Sun makes warm weather,
I'll catch you a cockatoo,
When cold comes, or when 'tis hot
White man, don't leave me!
With a rosy posey,
When I'm dosey,
Bear-skin night-caps, too, shall
warm my head.
Bear-skin night-caps, etc. etc.
Trudge. Zounds! leopard's skin for winter wear, and feathers for a summer's suit! Ha, ba! I shall look like a walking hammer-cloth, at Christmas, and an upright shuttlecock, in the dog-days. And for all this, if my master SCENE I.-The Quay at Barbadoes. and I find our way to England, you shall be Enter several PLANTERS. part of our travelling equipage; and, when I get there, I'll give you a couple of snug rooms, 1st Plant. I saw her this morning, gentleon a first floor, and visit you every evening men, you may depend on't. My telescope as soon as I come from the counting house. Do you like it?
Trudge. Damme, what a flashy fellow I shall seem in the city! I'll get her a white boy 1) to bring up the tea-kettle, Then I'll teach you to write and dress hair.
never fails me. I pop'd upon her as I was taking a peep from my balcony. A brave tight ship, I tell you, bearing down directly for Barbadoes here.
2d Plant. Ods my life! rare news! We have not had a vessel arrive in our harbour these six weeks.
Wows. You great man in your country? 3d Plant. And the last brought only madam Trudge. Oh yes, a very great man. I'm Narcissa, our Governor's daughter, from Enghead clerk of the counting-house, and first land; with a parcel of lazy, idle, white folks valet-de-chambre of the dressing-room. Ipounce about her. Such cargoes will never do for parchments, powder hair, black shoes, ink pa- our trade, neighbour.
Wows, No: you be my chum-chum!
per, shave beards, and mend pens. But, hold; 4th Plant. No, no: we want slaves. A terI had forgot one material point-you arn't rible dearth of 'em in Barbadoes, lately! but married, I hope? your dingy passengers for my money. Give me a vessel like a collier, where all the lading Trudge. So I will. It's best, however, to tumbles out as black as my hat. But are you be sure of her being single; for Indian hus-sure, now, you aren't mistaken? bands are not quite so complaisant as English [To 1st Planter. ones, and the vulgar dogs might thing of looking 1st Plant. Mistaken! 'sbud, do you doubt 1) In the time when people easily made great fortunes, my glass? I can discover a gull by it six leain a short time, in the Indies, it was customary for gues off: I could see every thing as plain as these persons to bring over with them a black boy to if I was on board.
wait at table, and act as lady's footman, (probably) 2d Plant. Indeed! and what were her cofrom the idea that they would make better servants,
as not having the same ideas of liberty as an English lours?
servant) so that Trudge's idea of having a white boy for black Wowski makes a laughable contrast, not
1st Plant. Um! why English-or Dutch
only of the lady with that of the boy; but also the or French-I don't exactly remember.
custom that was, with that he pretended to introduce.
3d Plant. What were the sailors aboard?
1st Plant. Eh! why they were English too Patty. Not I, ma'am, not I. But, if our -or Dutch-or French-I can't perfectly re- voyage from England was so pleasant, it collect. wasn't owing to Mr. Inkle, I'm certain. He 4th Plant. Your glass, neighbour, is a little didn't play the fiddle in our cabin, and dance like a glass to much: it makes you forget on the deck, and come languishing with a every thing you ought to remember. glass of warm water in his hand, when we
[Cry without, A sail, a sail. were seasick. Ah, ma'am, that water warm'd Now, your heart, I'm confident. Mr. Inkle; no, no! Captain Cam
1st Plant. Egad, but I'm right tho'.
Enter NARCISSA and PATTY.
Beats in my perturbed breast;
Patty. Lord, madam, how is it possible to help talking? We are in Barbadoes, here, to be sure-but then, ma'am, one may let out a little in a private morning's walk by ourselves. Nar. Nay, it's the same thing with you indoors. [for a gown. Patty. I never blab, ma'am, never, as I hope Nar. And your never blabbing, as you call it, depends chiefly on that hope, I believe. The unlocking my chest, locks up all your faculties. An old silk gown makes you turn your back on all my secrets; a large bonnet blinds your eyes; and a fashionable high handkerchief covers your ears, and stops your mouth at once, Patty.
Nar. There is no end to this! Remember, Patty, keep your secrecy, or you entirely lose my favour.
Paty. Never fear me, ma'am. But if somebody I know is not acquainted with the governor, there's such a thing as dancing at balls, and squeezing hands when you lead up, and squeezing them again when you cast down, and walking on the quay in a morning. Oh, I won't utter a syllable. [Archly] But remember, I'm as close as a patch-box. Mum's the word, ma'am, I promise you.
This maxim let ev'ry one hear,
Proclaim'd from the north to the south;
Should never run out at your mouth.
The judge in dull dignity drest,
In silence hears barristers preach;
He'll get up, and give them a speech.
Is certain to kiss, and cry mum. [Exit. Nar. How awkward is my present situation! promised to one, who, perhaps, may never Patty. Dear ma'am, how can you think a again be heard of; and who, I am sure, if body so mercenary! am I always teasing you he ever appears to claim me, will do it mereabout gowns and gew-gaws, and fal-lals and ly on the score of interest-pressed too by finery? Or do you take me for a conjuror, another, who has already, I fear, too much that nothing will come out of my mouth but interest in my heart-what can I do? What ribbons? I have told the story of our voyage, plan can I follow? indeed, to old Guzzle, the butler, who is very inquisitive; and, between ourselves, is the ugliest old quiz I ever saw in my life.
Nar. Well, well, I have seen him; pitted with the small-pox, and a red face.
Camp. Follow my advice, Narcissa, by all means. Enlist with me, under the best banners in the world. General Hymen for my Putty. Right, ma'am. It's for all the world money! little Cupid's his drummer: he has like his master's cellar, full of holes and li- been beating a round rub-a-dub on our hearts, quor. But, when he asks me what you and and we have only to obey the word of comI think of the matter, why I look wise, and mand, fall into the ranks of matrimony, and cry, like other wise people who have nothing march through life together.. to say-All's for the best.
Nar. And, thus, you lead him to imagine I am but little inclined to the match.
Patty. Lord, ma'am, how could that be? Why, I never said a word about Captain Campley.
Nar. Then consider our situation.
Camp. That has been duly considered. In short, the case stands exactly thus-your intended spouse is all for money: I am all for love: he is a rich rogue: I am rather a poor honest fellow. He would pocket your fortune; I will take you without a fortune in your
Nar. Hush! hush, for heaven's sake. Patty. Ay! there it is now.-There, ma'am, pocket. I'm as mute as a mackarel-That name stri- Nar. Oh! I am sensible of the favour, most kes me dumb in a moment. I don't know gallant Captain Campley; and my father, no how it is, but Captain Campley some how doubt, will be very much obliged to you. or other has the knack of stopping my mouth Camp. Aye, there's the devil of it! Sir oftener than any body else, ma'am.
Nar. His name again!-Consider. mention it; I desire you.
Christopher Curry's confounded good charac Never ter-knocks me up at once. Yet I am not acquainted with him, neither; not known to
him, even by sight; being here only as a private gentleman on a visit to my old relation, out of regimentals, and so forth; and not introduced to the Governor as other officers of the place: but then the report of his hospitality-his odd, blunt, whimsical, friendship—his| whole behaviour
Nar. All stare you in the face, eh, Campley? Camp. They do, till they put me out of countenance: but then again, when I stare you in the face, I can't think I have any reason to be ashamed of my proceedings-I stick here, between my love and my principle, like a song between a toast and a sentiment.
Nar. And, if your love and your principle were put in the scales, you doubt which would weigh most?
Camp. Oh, no! I should act like a rogue, and let principle kick the beam: for love, Narcissa, is as heavy as lead, and, like a bullet from a pistol, could never go through the heart, if it wanted weight.
Nar. Or rather like the pistol_itself, that often goes off without any harm done. Your fire must end in smoke, I believe. Camp. Never, whilst
Trudge. That's right. Somebody might steal 'em perhaps.
Wows. Steal!-What that?
Trudge. Oh, lord! see what one loses by
Nar. Nay, a truce to protestations at pre-not being born in a Christian country. sent. What signifies talking to me, when Run. If you would, sir, but mention to you have such opposition from others? Why your master, the house that belongs to my hover about the city, instead of boldy attack-master; the best accommodations on the quay.— ing the guard? Wheel about, captain! face the enemy! march! charge! rout 'em-Drive 'em before you, and then-
Camp. And then
Nar. Lud have mercy on the poor city!
In the cause of battles hearty,
Hear then, captains, ye who bluster,
Trudge. What's your sign, my lad?
Run. The Crown, sir-Here it is. Trudge. Well, get us a room for half an hour, and we'll come: and hark'ee! let it be light and airy, d'ye hear? My master has been used to your open apartments lately.
Run. Depend on it.-Much obliged to you, [Exit. Wows. Who be that fine man? He great prince?
Trudge. A prince-Ha! ha!-No, not quite But how do you like this, Wows? Isn't it fine? a prince-but he belongs to the crown.
Trudge. Fine men, eh!
Wows. Iss! all white; like you.
Trudge. Yes, all the fine men are like me: as different from your people as powder and ink, or paper and blacking.
Wows. And fine lady-Face like snow. Enter PATTY, hastily. Trudge. What! the fine ladies' complexiPatty. Oh lud, ma'am, I'm frightened out ons? Oh, yes, exactly; for too much heat very of my wits! sure as I'm alive, ma'am, Mr. Ink- often dissolves 'em! Then their dress, too. le is not dead; I saw his man, ma'am, just Wows. Your countrymen dress so? now, coming ashore in a boat with other pas- Trudge. Better, better, a great deal. Why, sengers, from the vessel that's come to the a young flashy Englishman will sometimes island. [Exit. carry a whole fortune on his back. But did Nar. [To Camp.] Look'ye, Mr. Campley, you mind the women? All here- and there; something has happened which makes me waive [Pointing before and behind] they have it ceremonies. If you mean to apply to my fa- all from us in England. And then the fine ther, remember that delays are dangerous. things they carry on their heads, Wowski Camp. Indeed! Wows. Iss. One lady carry good fish
Nar. I mayn't be always in the same mind, fine, she call every body to look at her. you know. [Smiling. Trudge. Pshaw! an old woman bawling Camp. Nay, then-Gad, I'm almost afraid flounders. But the fine girls we meet, here, too-but living in this state of doubt is tor-on the quay-so round, and so plump! ment. I'll e'en put a good face on the mat- Wows. You not love me now. ter; cock my hat; make my bow; and try to reason the Governor into compliance. Faint heart never won a fair lady. Why should I vain fears dicover,
Prove a dying, sighing swain?
Trudge. Not love you! Zounds, have not I given you proofs?
Wows. Iss. Great many: but now you get here, you forget poor Wowski!
Trudge. Not I: I'll stick to you like wax.
Wows. Ah, I fear! What make you love
Trudge. Gratitude, to be sure.
Trudge. Not she-she never went to market in all her life.
Plant. I mean, is she for our sale of slaves? Our Black Fair? .
Trudge. Ha! this it is, now, to live without education. The poor dull devils of her coun-it try are all in the practice of gratitude, without finding out what it means; while we can tell the meaning of it, with little or no practice at all.-Lord, lord, what a fine advantage Christian learning is! Hark'ee, Wows! Wows. Iss.
Trudge. Now we've accomplished our landing, I'll accomplish you. You remember the instructions I gave you on the voyage? Wows. Iss.
Trudge. Let's see now-What are you to do, when I introduce you to the nobility, gentry, and others-of my acquaintance?
Trudge. A black fair! ha, ha, ha! You hold
Plant. Aye, aye, natural enough at sea-
Plant. Pshaw! you mean to sell her? Trudge. [Staring] Zounds! what a devil of a fellow! Sell Wows!-my poor, dear, dingy wife!
Plant. Come, come, I've heard your story from the ship.-Don't let's haggle; I'll bid as Wows. Make believe sit down; then get up. fair as any trader amongst us: but no tricks Trudge. Let me see you do it. [She makes upon travellers, young man, to raise your a low curtesy] Very well! And how are you price. Your wife, indeed! Why she's no to recommend yourself, when you have no-Christian?
thing to say, amongst all our great friends? Trudge. No; but I am; so I shall do as
Trudge. Why would you do that?
Trudge. That's a good girl! and I wish Trudge. Plague on't; there it is. I shall every body could boast of so kind a motive, be laughed out of my honesty, here.—But you for such cursed cruel behaviour.-Lord! how may be jogging, friend; I may feel a little some of your flashy banker's clerks have cut queer, perhaps, at showing her face-but, me in Threadneedle-street. But come, though dam'me, if ever I do any thing to make me we have got among fine folks, here, in an ashamed of showing my own. [xion— English settlement, I won't be ashamed of my Plant. Why, I tell you, her very comple old acquaintance: yet, for my own part, I Trudge. Rot her complexion.-I'll tell you should not be sorry, now, to see my old friend what, Mr. Fair-trader; if your head and heart with a new face. Odsbobs! I see Mr. Inkle were to change places, I've a notion you'd -Go in, Wows;-call for what you like best. be as black in the face as an ink-bottle. Wows. Then, I call for you-ah! I fear I Plant. Pshaw! The fellow's a fool-a rude not see you often now. But you come soon-rascal-he ought to be sent back to the savages, again. He's not fit to live among us
Remember when we walk'd alone,
And heard, so gruff, the lion growl; And when the moon so bright it shone, We saw the wolf look up and howl; I led you well, safe to our cell,
You said to me,
– And kiss'd so sweet-dear Wowski tell, How could I live without ye?
But now you come across the sea,
And tell me here no monsters roar;
Enter first PLAnter.
Plant. Hark'ee, young man! Is that young Indian of your's going to our market?
Trudge. Oh, here he is at last.