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wise, in decency, and indeed in national affection, | gives a servant a bad word, nor that does any one being a Scotchman myself, I can have no objection an ill turn, neither behind their back nor before to her on that account:-besides, she is my near their face. relation.

Sid. So I understand. But pray, Charles, how came Lady Rodolpha, who I find was born in England, to be bred in Scotland?

Eger. From the dotage of an old, formal, obstinate, stiff, rich, Scotch grandmother; who, upon a promise of leaving this grandchild all her fortune, would have the girl sent to her to Scotland, when she was but a year old; and there has she been ever since, bred up with this old lady, in all the vanity and unlimited indulgence that fondness and admiration could bestow on a spoiled child, a fancied beauty, and a pretended wit: (in a tone of friendly affection) and is this a woman fit to make my happiness? this the partner that Sidney would recommend to me for life? to you, who best know me, I appeal.

Sid. Why, Charles, it is a delicate point, unfit for me to determine; besides, your father has set his heart upon the match.

Eger. (Impatiently.) All that I know-but still I ask and insist upon your candid judgment-is she the kind of woman that you think could possibly contribute to my happiness? I beg you will give me an explicit answer.

Sid The subject is disagreeable; but, since I must speak, I do not think she is.

Eger. (In a start of friendly rapture.) I know you do not; and I am sure you never will advise Sid. I never will-I never will. [the match Eger. (With a start of joy.) You make me happy! Which, I assure you, I never could be with your judgment against me in this point.

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Sid. Ha, ha, ha! why, you are a mighty wellspoken woman, Mrs. Betty; and I am mightily beholden to you for your good character of me.

Bet. Indeed, it is no more than you deserve, and what all the world and all the servants say of you. Sid. I am much obliged to them, Mrs. Betty; but, pray, what are your commands with me? Betty. Why, I'll tell you, sir;-to be sure, I am but a servant, as a body may say, and every tub should stand upon its own bottom; but-(she looks about cautiously)-my young master is now in the china-room, in close conference with Miss Constantia. I know what they are about, but that is no business of mine; and, therefore, I made bold to listen a little; because, you know, sir, one would be sure, before one took away anybody's reputation.

Sid. Very true, Mrs. Betty; very true, indeed. Betty. O! heavens forbid that I should take away any young woman's good name, unless I had a good reason for it; but, sir, (with great solemnity), if I am in this place alive, as I listened with my ear close to the door, I heard my young master ask Miss Constantia the plain marriage question; upon which I started and trembled, nay, my very conscience stirred within me so, that I could not help peeping through the key-hole.

Sid. Ha, ha, ha! and so your conscience made you peep through the key-hole, Mrs. Betty?

Betty. It did, indeed, sir; and there I saw my young master upon his knees-lord bless us! and what do you think he was doing?-kissing her hand as if he would eat it; and protesting and assuring her he know that you, sir, would consent to the match; and then the tears ran down her cheeks as fast

Sid. Ay.

Betty. They did indeed. I would not tell your reverence a lie for the world.

Sid. I believe it, Mrs. Betty; and what did Constantia say to all this?

Sid. But pray, Charles, suppose I had been so indiscreet as to have agreed to marry you to Constantia, would she have consented, think you? Eger. That I cannot say positively; but I suppose so. [ject, then? Sid. Did you never speak to her upon that subEger. In general terms only; never directly requested her consent in form: (he starts into a warmth of amorous resolution) but I will this very Betty. Oh!-Oh! she is sly enough; she looks as moment, for I have no asylum from my father's ar- if butter would not melt in her mouth; but all is bitrary design, but my Constantia's arms. Pray not gold that glitters; smooth water, you know, do not stir from hence; I will return instantly. sir, runs deepest. I am sorry my young master I know she will submit to your advice; and I am makes such a fool of himself; but, um!-take my sure you will persuade her to my wish, as my life, word for it, he is not the man; for, though she my peace, my earthly happiness, depend on my looks as modest as a maid at a christening,-(hesiConstantia. [Exit. tating)-yet-ah!—when sweethearts meet, in the Sid. Poor Charles! he little dreams that I love dusk of the evening, and stay together a whole Constantia too; but to what degree I knew not my-hour in the dark grove, and embrace, and kiss, and self, till he importuned me to join their hands. weep at parting-why, then, you know, sir, it is Yes, I love; but must not be a rival, for he is dear easy to guess all the rest. to me as fraternal affinity.

Enter BETTY.

Betty. (Running up to Sidney.) I beg pardon for my intrusion, sir, I hope, sir, I don't disturb your reverence.

Sid. Not in the least, Mrs. Betty.

Betty. I humbly beg you will excuse me, sir; but I wanted to break my mind to your honour, about a scruple that lies upon my conscience; and indeed I should not have presumed to trouble you, sir, but that I know you are my young master's friend, and my old master's friend, and, indeed, a friend to the whole family; (curtsying very low), for, to give you your due, sir, you are as good a preacher as ever went into a pulpit.

Sid. Ha, ha, ha! do you think so, Mrs. Betty? Bet. Ay, in truth do I; and as good a gentleman, too, as ever came into a family, and one that never

Sid. Why did Constantia meet anybody in this manner?

Betty. (Starting with surprise.) O! heavens! I beg, sir, you will not misapprehend me; for I assure you, I do not believe they did any harm; that is, not in the grove; at least not when I was there; and she may be honestly married for aught I know. O! lud, sir, I would not say an ill thing of Miss Constantia for the world. I only say that they did meet in the dark walk; and all the servants observe that Miss Constantia wears her stays very loose, looks very pale, is sick in the morning and after dinner; and, as sure as my name is Betty Hint, something has happened that I won't name; but, nine months hence, a certain person in this family may ask me to stand god-mother; for I think I know what's what, when I see it, as well as another

Sid. No doubt you do, Mrs. Betty.

Betty. (Going and returning). I do indeed, sir; and so, your servant, sir. But I hope your worship won't mention my name in this business; or that you had an item from me.

Sid. I shall not, Mrs. Betty.

Betty. For, indeed, sir, I am no busybody, nor do I love fending nor proving; and I assure you, sir, 1 hate all tittling and tattling, and gossiping, and backbiting, and taking away a person's good name. Sid. I observe you do, Mrs. Betty.

Petty. I do, indeed, sir; I am the farthest from it in the world.

Sid. I dare say you are.

Betty I am indeed, sir; and so your humble Sid. Your servant, Mrs. Betty. [servant. Betty (Aside, in great exultation.) So! I see he believe every word I say-that's charming. I'll do herɔusiness for her, I'm resolved. [Exit. Sid. What can this ridiculous creature mean by her dak walk, her private spark, her kissing, and all herslanderous insinuations against Constantia, whoseconduct is as unblamable as innocence itself? I see envy is as malignant in a paltry waiting wench, as in the vainest or most ambitious lady o the court. It is always an infallible mark of the basest nature; and merit in the lowest, as well a in the highest station, must feel the shaft of envy'constant agents-falsehood and slander.


SCENE I-A Library


Enter CONSTANTIA and EGERTON. Con Mr. Sidney is not here, sir. Ege I assure you I left him, and begged he would stay till I returned.

Con His prudence, you see, sir, has made him retire; erefore we had better defer the subject till he is resent; in the meantime, sir, I hope you will perm me to mention an affair that has greatly alarmd and perplexed me: I suppose you guess what is?

Ege I do not, upon my word. ConThat is a little strange. You know, sir, that pu and Mr. Sidney did me the honour of brealasting with me this morning in my little Ege We had that happiness, madam. [study. ConJust after you left me, upon opening my book f accounts, which lay in the drawer of the readig desk, to my great surprise, I there found this ce of jewels, containing a most elegant pair of earings, a necklace of great value, and two bankills in this pocket-book, the mystery of whiclsir, I presume, you can explain? Eg I can.

CoThey were of your conveying, then?
Eg They were, madam.

CoI assure you, they startled and alarmed me. Eg I hope it was a kind of alarm, such as blushg virtue feels, when with her hand, she gives her hrt and last consent.

Co It was not indeed, sir.

Eg Do not say so, Constantia: come, be kind at on; my peace and worldly bliss depend upon this pment.

Co What would you have me do? Eg What love and virtue dictate. CoO! sir, experience but too severely proves, that ich unequal matches as ours, never produce aughbut contempt and anger in parents, censure frome world, and a long train of sorrow and repentce in the wretched parties; which is but too ofterntailed upon their hapless issue.

E. But that, Constantia, cannot be our case:


my fortune is independent and ample; equal to luxury and splendid folly. I have a right to choose the partner of my heart.

Con. But I have not, sir; I am a dependant on my lady-a poor, forsaken, helpless orphan: your benevolent mother found me, took me to her bosom, and there supplied my parental loss, with every tender care, indulgent dalliance, and with all the sweet persuasion that maternal fondness, religious precept, polished manners, and hourly example could administer-she fostered me: (weeps) and shall I now turn viper, and with black ingratitude sting the tender heart that thus hath cherished me? shall I seduce her house's heir, and kill her peace? No; though I loved to the mad extreme of female fondness; though every worldly bliss, that woman's vanity or man's ambition could desire, followed the indulgence of my love, and all the contempt and misery of this life, the denial of that indulgence, I would discharge my duty to my benefactress-my earthly guardian, my more than parent.

Eger. My dear Constantia, your prudence, your gratitude, and the cruel virtue of your self-denial, do but increase my love, my admiration, and my misery. Con. Sir, I must beg you will give me leave to return these bills and jewels.

Eger. Pray do not mention them: sure my kindness and esteem may be indulged so far without suspicion or reproach: I beg you will accept of them; nay, I insist.

Con. I have done, sir; my station here is to obey. I know, sir, they are gifts of a virtuous mind; and mine shall convert them to the tenderest and most grateful use.

Eger. Hark! I hear a coach; it is my father. Dear girl, retire and compose yourself. I will send my lady and Sidney to you; and by their judgment we will be directed: will that satisfy you?

Con. I can have no will but my lady's. With your leave, I will retire; I would not see her in this con


Eger. Dear girl, Adieu!

[Exit Constantia. Enter SAM. Sam. Sir Pertinax and my lady are come, sir; and my lady desires to speak with you in her own room.-Oh! here she is, sir. [Exit.

Enter LADY MACSYCOPHANT. Lady M. (In great confusion and distress.) Dear child. I am glad to see you; why did not you come to town yesterday, to attend the levee; your father is incensed to the utmost at your not being there.

Eger, (With great warmth.) Madam, it is with extreme regret I tell you, that I can be no longer a slave to his temper, his politics, and his scheme of marrying me to this woman; therefore, you had better consent at once to my going out of the kingdom, and my taking Constantia with me; for without her I never can be happy.

Lady M. As you regard my peace, or your own character, I beg you will not be guilty of so rash a step. You promised me you would never marry her without my consent. I will open it to your father. Pray, dear Charles, be ruled: let me pre


Sir P. (Without, in great anger.) Sir, wull ye do as ye are bid, and haud your gab, you rascal! You are so full of gab, you scoundrel! Take the chesnut gelding, return to town directly, and see what is become of my Lord Lumbercourt.

Lady M. Here he comes. I will get out of his way; but, I beg, Charles, while he is in this illhumour that you will not oppose him, let him say

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[Exit Lady M. Sir P. (Without.) Here, you Tomlins, where is my son Egerton?

Tom. (Without.) In the library, sir.

and of aw national distinctions whatever, relative to the three kingdoms? (With great anger.) And, you blockhead! was that a prudent wish before so many of your ain countrymen? or was it a filial language to hold before me?

Eger. Sir, with your pardon, I cannot think it unfilial or imprudent. (With a most patriotic

Sir P. (Without.) As soon as the lawyers come, be warmth.) I own I do wish, most ardently wish, sure bring me word.


Sir P. Weel, sir! vary weel! vary weel! are nat ye a fine spark? are ye nat a fine spark, I say? Ah! ye are a-So you wou'd not come up till the levee?

Eger. Sir, I beg your pardon; but I was not very well; besides, I did not think my presence there was necessary.

Sir P. (Snapping him up.) Sir, it was necessary; I tauld you it was necessary: and, sir, I must now tell you that the whole tenor of your conduct is most offensive.

Eger. I am sorry you think so, sir; I am sure I do not mean to offend you.

Sir P. I care not what you intend. Sir, I tell you, you do offend. What is the meaning of this conduct, sir?-Neglect the levee!-'death, sir, you -what is your reason, I say, for thus neglecting the levee, and disobeying my commands?

Eger. (With a stifled, filial resentment.) Sir, I am not used to levees; nor do I know how to dispose of myself; nor what to say or do in such a situation.

Sir P. (With a proud, angry resentment.) Zounds! sir, do you nat see what others do? gentle and simple, temporal and spiritual, lords, members, judges, generals, and bishops; aw crowding, bustling, and pushing foremost intill the middle of the circle, and there waiting, watching, and striving to catch a look or a smile fra the great mon, which they meet wi' an amicable reesibility of aspect a modest cadence of body, and a conciliating co-operation of the whole mon; which expresses an officious promptitude for his service, and indicates that they Îuock upon themselves as the suppliant appendages of his power, and the enlisted Swiss of his poleetical fortune; this, sir, is what you ought to do; and this, sir, is what I never once omitted for this fiveand-thraty years, let who would be minister. Eger. (Aside.) Contemptible!

Sir P. What is that you mutter, sir? Eger. Only a slight reflection, sir, not relative to you.

Sir P. Sir, your absenting yourself fra the levee at this juncture if suspeecious; it is looked upon as a kind of disaffection, and aw your countrymen are highly offended at your conduct. For this, sir, they do not look upon you as a friend or weel-wisher either to Scotland or Scotchmen.

Eger. (With a quick warmth.) Then sir, they wrong me, I assure you; but, pray sir, in what particular can I be charged, either with coldness or offence to my country?

Sir P. Why, sir, ever since your mother's uncle, Sir Stanley Egerton, left you his three thousand pounds a-year, and that you have, in compliance with his will, taken up the name of Egerton, they think you are grown proud; that you have estranged yourself fra the Macsycophants; have associated with your mother's family-with the opposeetion; and with those who do not wish well to Scotland: besides, sir, the other day, in a conversation, at dinner, at your cousin Campbell M'Kenzie's, before a whole table full of your ain relations, did you not publicly wish a total extinguishment to aw party,

for a total extinction of all party; particularly, that those of English, Irish, and Scotch, might never more be brought into contest or competition : unless, like loving brothers, in generous emulation for one common cause.

Sir P. How, sir! do you persist? What! would you banish aw party, and aw distinction between English, Irish, and your ain countrymen.

Eger. (With great dignity of spirit.) I woull, sir. Sir P. Then d-n you, sir; you are nae trie Scot. Ay, sir, you may look as angry as you vill, but again, I say, you are nae true Scot.

Eger. Your pardon, sir; I think he is the true Scot, and the true citizen, who wishes equal justice to the merit and demerit of every subject of Great Britain! amongst whom I know but of two distinctions. those?

Sir P. Weel, sir, and what are those-wiat are
Eger. The knave and the honest man.
Sir P. Psha! rideeculous!

Eger. And he who makes any other, let him be of the north, or of the south-of the east, or of the west-in place, or out of place, is an enemy to the whole, and to the virtues of humanity.


Sir P. Ay, sir, this is your brother's imudent doctrine; for the which I have banished Im for ever fra my presence, my heart, and my frtune. Sir, I will have no son of mine, because, trulyhe has been educated in an English seminary, prsume, under the mask of candour, to speak against is native, land or against my principles. Scotchmen, sir, Scotchmen, wherever they meet throughout globe, should unite, and stick together, as i were, in a political phalanx. However, nae mair f that now; I will talk at large to you about tha anon. In the meanwhile, sir, notwithstanding yor contempt of my advice, and your disobedience ill my commands, I will convince you of my patenal attention till your welfare, by my managementf this voluptuary, this Lord Lumbercourt, whose aughter you are to marry. You ken, sir, that theellow has been my patron above these five-andhraty years.

Eger. True, sir.

Sir P. Vary weel. And now, sir, you te, by his prodigality, he is become my dependan and, accordingly, I have made my bargain with hi: the devil a baubee he has in the world but whatomes through these clutches; for his whole estate, which has three impleecit boroughs upon it-mak!-is now in my custody at nurse, the which estte, on my paying off his debts, and allowing hima liferent of five thousand pounds per annum, i to be made over till me for my life, and at my dean is to descend till ye and your issue. The peeige of Lumbercourt, you ken, will follow of coure So, sir, you see, there are three impleecit boughs, the whole patrimony of Lumbercourt, and peerage at one slap. Why, it is a stroke-a hit a hit. Zounds! sir, a mon may live a century, ad not make sic an hit again.

Eger. It is a very advantageous bargain ideed, sir; but what will my lord's family say to it.

Sir P. Why, mon, he cares not if his famil were aw at the devil, so his luxury is but gratified only let him have his race-horse to feed his vanit; his

harridan to drink drams with him, scrat his face,
and burn his periwig, when she is in her maudlin
hysterics; and three or four discontented patriotic
dependants, to abuse the ministry, and settle the
affairs of the nation, when they are aw intoxicated;
and then, sir, the fellow has aw his wishes, and aw
his wants in this world and the next.

Tom. Lady Rodolpha is come, sir.
Sir P. And my lord?

Tom. Not yet, sir, he is about a mile behind, the servants say.

Sir P. Let me know the instant he arrives.
Tom I shall, sir,

(Exit. Sir 2. Step you out, Charles, and receive Lady Rodolma; and I desire you will treat her with as much nspect and gallantry as possible; for my lord has hirted that you have been very remiss as a lover. Adzooks! Charles, you should administer a whole orrent of flattery till her; for a woman ne'er tinks a mon loves her, till he has made an idiot o her understanding by flattery: flattery is the prine bliss of the sex, the nectar and ambrosia of ther charms, and you can ne'er gi' 'em o'er muckl on't; so, there's a guid lad, gang and mind your fittery. [Exit Egerton. Ah! I must keep a devilis tight hand upon this fellow. Ah! I am frightaed out of my wits, lest his mother's family should seduce him to desert to their party, which would otally ruin my whole scheme, and break my heart. A fine time of day for a blockhead to turn patrio when the character is exploded, marked, proscrbed! Why, the common people, the vary vulgar have found out the jest, and laugh at a patrio now-a-day, just as they do at a conjurer, a magian, or any other impostor in society.

Tom Lord Lumbercourt.


Lord. Sir Pertinax, I kiss your hand. Sir. Your lordship's most devoted. Lord. Why, you stole a march upon me this mornig gave me the slip, Mac; though I never wante your assistance more in my life. I thought you wald have called upon me.

Sir My dear lord, I beg ten millions of pardons fr leaving town before you; but ye ken that your Irdship, at dinner yesterday, settled it that we sheld meet this morning at the levee.

Lord. That I acknowledge, Mac; I did promise to be tere, I own.

Sir You did, indeed; and accordingly I was at the vee, and waited there till every soul was gone; nd seeing you did not come, I concluded that yer lordship was gone before.

Lord. Why, to confess the truth, my dear Mac, those id sinners, Lord Freakish, General Jolly, Sir Amony Soaker, and two or three more of that set, laihold of me last night at the opera; and, as the Geral says, "from the intelligence of my head ts morning," I believe we drank pretty deep ere woarted: ha, ha, ha!

Sir Ha, ha, ha! nay, if you were with that party, by lord, I do not wonder at not seeing your lordsh at the levee.

Lord. The truth is, Sir Pertinex, my fellow let me sle too long for the levee. But I wish I had seen y before you left town; I wanted you dreadfully.!

Siri I am heartily sorry that I was not in the way; it on what account did you want me?

Lord. Ha, ha, ha! a cursed awkward affair; and-, ha, ha!-yet, I can't help laughing at it, neithe though it vexed me confoundedly.

Sir. Vexed you, my lord? Zounds! I wish I

I had been with you! But, for heaven's sake! my lord, what was it that could possibly vex your lordship? Lord L. Why, that impudent, teasing, dunning, rascal, Mahogany, my upholsterer; you know the Sir P. Perfectly, my lord. [fellow ? Lord L. The impudent scoundrel has sued me up to some d-d kind of a-something or other in the law, that I think they call an execution.

Sir P. The rascal!

Lord L. Upon which, sir, the fellow, by way of asking pardon-ha, ha, ha!-had the modesty to wait on me two or three days ago, to inform my honour-ha, ha, ha!-as he was pleased to dignify me, that the execution was now ready to be put in force against my honour; but that, out of respect to my honour, as he had taken a great deal of my honour's money, he would not suffer his lawyer to serve it, till he had first informed my honour; because he was not willing to affront my honour-ha, ha, ha!-a son of a w

Sir P. I never heard of so impudent a dog. Lord L. Now, my dear Mac-ha, ha, ha!-as the scoundrel's apology was so very satisfactory, and his information so very agreeable, I told him that, in honour, I thought that my honour could not do less than to order his honour to be paid immediately.

Sir P. Vary weel, vary weel! you were as complaisant to the scoundrel till the full, I think, my ford.

Lord L. You shall hear, you shall hear, Mac; so sir, with great composure, seeing a smart oaken cudgel that stood very handily in a corner of my dressing-room, I ordered two of my fellows to hold the rascal, and another to take the cudgel, and return the scoundrel's civility with a good drubbing, as long as the stick lasted.

Sir P. Ha, ha, ha! admirable! as good a stroke of humour as ever I heard of. And, did they drub him, my lord?

Lord L. Most liberally, most liberally, sir; and there I thought the affair would have rested, till I should think proper to pay the scoundrel; but this morning, just as I was stepping into my chaise, my servants about me, a fellow called a tipstaff, stepped up, and begged the favour of my footman, who thrashed the upholsterer, and of the two that held him, to go along with him upon a little business to my Lord Chief Justice.

Sir P. The devil!

Lord L. And, at the same instant, I, in my turn, was accosted by two other very civil scoundrels; who, with a most insolent politeness, begged my pardon, and informed me that I must not go into my own chaise!

Sir P. How, my lord, not into your ain carriage? Lord L. No, sir; for that they, by order of the sheriff, must seize it, at the suit of a gentlemanone Mr. Mahogany, an upholsterer.

Sir P. An impudent villain!

Lord L. It is all true, I assure you; so you see, my dear Mac, what a d-d country this is to live in, where noblemen are obliged to pay their debts just like merchants, cobblers, peasants, or mechanics: is not that a scandal, dear Mac, to this nation?

Sir P. My lord, it is not only a scandal, but a national grievance.

Lord L. Sir, there's not a nation in the world has such a grievance to complain of.

Sir P. Vary true, my lord, vary true; and it is monstrous that a mon of your lordship's condition is not entitled to run one of these mechanics through the body when he is impertinent about his money;

but our laws shamefully, on these occasions, make no distinction of persons amongst us.

Lord L. A vile policy, indeed, Sir Pertinax. But, sir, the scoundrel has seized upon the house, too, that I furnished for the girl I took from the opera. Sir P. I never heard of sic an a scoundrel! Lord L. Ay, but what concerns me most, I am afraid, my dear Mac, that the villain will send down to Newmarket, and seize my string of horses.

Sir P. Your string of horses? Zounds! we must prevent that at all events, that would be sic a disgrace. I will despatch an express to town directly, to put a stop till the rascal's proceedings.

Lord L. Pr'ythee do, my dear Sir Pertinax.
Sir P. O! it shall be done, my lord.
Lord L. Thou art an honest fellow, Sir Pertinax,
upon honour!

Sir P. O! my lord, it is my duty to oblige your
lordship to the utmost stretch of my abeelity.

Tom. Colonel Toper presents his compliments to you, sir; and having no family down with him in the country, he and Captain Hardbottle, if not inconvenient, will do themselves the honour of taking a family dinner with you.

Sir P. They are two of our militia-officers does your lordship know them?

Lord L. By sight only.

[our business. Sir P. I am afraid, my lord, they will interrupt Lord L. Not at all I shonld be glad to be acquainted with Toper; they say he's a jolly fellow. Sir P. O! devilish jolly, devilish jolly; he and the Captain are the two hardest drinkers in the country.

Lord L. So I have heard: let us have them by all means, Mac; they will enliven the scene. How far are they from you?

Sir P. Just across the meadows; not half a mile. my lord; a step, a step.

Lord L. O! let's have the jolly dogs, by all means. Sir P. My compliments, I shall be proud of their company. [Exit Tomlins.] Guif ye please, my lord, we will gang and chat a bit with the women; I have not seen Lady Rodolpha since she returned fra the Bath. I long to have a little news from her about the company there.

Lord L. O! she'll give you an account of them, I warrant you. (A very loud laugh without.) Lady R. (Without.) Ha, ha, ha! weel, I vow, cousin Egerton, you have a vast deal of shrewd humour. But, Lady Macsycophant, which way is Sir Pertinax?

Lady M. (Without.) Straight forward, madam. Lord L. Here the hairbrain comes: it must be her by the noise.

Lady R. (Without.) Allons, gude folks: fallow me-sans ceremonie. Enter LADY RODOLPHA, LADY MACSYCOPHANT, EGERTON, and SIDNEY. Lady R. (Running up to Sir P.) Sir Pertinax, your most devoted, most obsequious, most obedient vassal. (Curtsies very low.) Sir P. (Bowing ridiculously low.) Lady Rodolpha, down till the ground, my congratulations and duty attend you; and I should rejoice to kiss your ship's footsteps.

Lady R. Never better. Sir Pertinax; as weel as
youth, health, riotous spirits, and a careless, happy
heart can make me.

Sir P. I am mightily glad till hear it, my lady.
Lord L. Ay, ay; Rodolpha is always in spirits,
Sir Pertinax. Vive la bagatelle is the philosophy of
our family: ha, Rodolpha, ha?

Lady R. Traith it is, my lord; and upon honour,
I am determined it shall never be changed with
my consent. Weel, I vow-ha, ha, ha! Vive la
bagatelle would be a most brilliant motto for the
chariot of a belle of fashion. What say you till my
fancy, Lady Macsycophant?

Lady M. It would have novelty, at least, to recommend it, madam.

Lady R. Which of all charms is the most delightful that can accompany wit, taste, love, or friendship; for novelty I take to be the true jemne scai quoi of all wordlly bliss. Cousin Egerton, should you not like to have a wife with vive la bagatele upon her wedding chariot?

Eger. O certainly, madam.

Lady R. Yes, I think it would be quite out of the common, and singularly ailegant.

Eger. Indisputably, madam; for, as a metto is a word to the wise, or rather a broad hin to the whole world of a person's taste and principles, vive la bagatelle would be most expressive, at firt sight, of your ladyship's characteristic.

Lady R. (Curtsies.) Oh! Maister Egeron, you touch my very heart with your approbaton: ha, ha, ha! that is the vary spirit of my inention, the instant I commence bride. Weel, I m immensely proud that my fancy has the appobation of so sound an understanding, and so poished a taste, as that of the all-accomplished (urtsies) Mr. Egerton.

Sir P. Weel, but, Lady Rodolpha, I wanted to ask your ladyship some questions about he company at the Bath; they say you had all th world there.

Lady R. O, yes! there was a very great mb there indeed, but vary little company. Aw canille, except our ain party. The place was crowed with your little purse proud mechanics; an oddkind of queer looking animals, that have started irill fortune fra lottery-tickets, rich prizes at sea, gmbling in 'Change-alley, and sic like caprices of ortune; and away they aw crowd to the Bath, to lern genteelity, and the names, titles, intrigues, and on mots of us people of fashion-ha, ha, ha!

Lord L. Ha, ha, ha! I know them; I kow the things you mean, my dear, extremely well. I have observed them a thousand times, and wndered where the devil they all came from-ha, ha ha!

Lady M. Pray, Lady Rodolpha, what wre your diversions at Bath?

Lady M. Guid traith, my lady, the compay were my diversion; and better nae human folbs ever afforded-ha, ha, ha! sic an a mixture, ancsic oddities!-ha, ha, ha! a perfect gallimaufry Lady Kunegunda M'Kenzie and I used to gan about till every part of this human chaos, on pupose to reconnoitre the monsters, and pick up ther frivolady-lities-ha, ha, ha!

Lady R. (Curtsying very low.) Oh! Sir Pertinax your humeelity is most sublimely complaisant; at present unanswerable! but I shall intensely study to return it at fifty fald.

Sir P. Your ladyship does me singular honour. Weel, madam; ha! you look gaily; weel, and how, how is your ladyship after your jaunt

till Bath?

Sir P. Ha, ha, ha! why that must havebeen a high entertainment till your ladyship.

Lady R. Superlative and inexhaustible, ir Pertinax-ha, ha, ha! Madam, we had in on group, a peer and a sharper, a duchess and a pimaker's wife; a boarding-school miss and her grandmother; a fat parson, a lean general, and yellow admiral-ha, ha, ha! aw speaking together, and bawling and wrangling in fierce contentia, as if

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