more, sir; let me but get him into the bands of matrimony, I'll spoil his wand'ring, I warrant him; I'll do his business that way, never fear.

Dug. Well, sister, I won't pretend to understand the engagements between you and your lover; I expect when you have need of my counsel or assistance, you will let me know more of your affairs. Mirabel is a gentleman, and as far as my honour and interest can reach, you may command me to the furtherance of your happiness: in the mean time, sister, I have a great mind to make you a present of another humble servant; a fellow that I took up at Lyons, who has serv'd me honestly ever since.

Ori. Then why will you part with him?

Dug. He has gain'd so insufferably on my good humour, that he's grown too familiar; but the fellow's cunning, and may be serviceable to you in your affair with Mirabel. Here he comes.

Enter PETIT.

Well, sir, have you been at Rousseau's?

Pet. Yes, sir, and who should I find there but Mr. Mirabel and the captain, hatching as warmly over a tub of ice, as two hen pheasants over a brood- -They would not let me bespeak any thing, for they had dined before I came.

Dug. Come, sir, you shall serve my sister; I shall still continue kind to you-Wait on your lady home, Petit.

Pet. A chair, a chair, a chair!

[Exit.

Ori. No, no, I'll walk home, 'tis but next door.

SCENE II. A Tavern.

[Exeunt.

MIRABEL and DURETETE discovered rising from the

Table.

Mir. Welcome to Paris once more, my dear captain; we have eat heartily, drank roundly, paid plentifully, and let it go for once. liked every thing but our women, they look'd so lean and tawdry, poor crea

tures! "Tis a sure sign the army is not paid.-Give me the plump Venetian, brisk and sanguine, that smiles upon me like the glowing sun, and meets my lips like sparkling wine, her person shining as the glass, and spirit like the foaming liquor.

Dur. Ah, Mirabel, Italy I grant you; but for our women here in France, they are such thin brawn-fall'n jades.

Mir, There's nothing on this side the Alps worth my humble service t'ye-Ha, Roma la santa! Italy for my money; their customs, gardens, buildings, paintings, music, policies, wine and women! the paradise of the world-not pester'd with a parcel of precise old gouty fellows, that would debar their children every pleasure that they themselves are past the sense of: commend me to the Italian familiarity: Here, son, there's fifty crowns, go pay your girl her week's allowance.

Dur. Ay, these are your fathers for you, that understand the necessities of young men; not like our musty dads, who because they cannot fish themselves, would muddy the water, and spoil the sport of them that can. But now you talk of the plump, what d'ye think of a Dutch woman?

Mir. A Dutch woman's too compact; nay, every thing among 'em is so; a Dutch man is thick, a Dutch woman is squab, a Dutch horse is round, a Dutch dog is short, a Dutch ship is broad-bottom'd; and in short one would swear the whole product of the country were cast in the same mould with their cheeses.

Dur. Ay, but Mirabel, you have forgot the English ladies.

Mir. The women of England were excellent, did they not take such unsufferable pains to ruin what nature has made so incomparably well. But come, Duretete, let us mind the business in hand; mistresses we must have, and must take up with the manufacture of the place, and upon a competent diligence we shall find those in Paris shall match the Italians from top to toe.

Dur. Ay, Mirabel, you will do well enough, but what will become of your friend? you know I am so

plaguy bashful, so naturally an ass upon these occasions,

that

Mir. Pshaw, you must be bolder, man: travel three years, and bring home such a baby as bashfulness! A great lusty fellow! and a soldier! fie upon it.

Dur. Lookye, sir, I can visit, and I can ogle a little --as thus, or thus now-but if they chance to give me a forbidding look, as some women, you know, have a devilish cast with their eyes—or if they cry—what d'ye mean? what d'ye take me for? Fie, sir, remember who am, sir-A person of quality to be us'd at this rate! 'Egad, I'm struck as flat as a frying-pan.

I

Mir. Words o'course! never mind 'em: Turn you about upon your heel with a jantée air; hum out the end of an old song; cut a cross caper, and at her again.

Dur. [Imitates him] No, hang it, 'twill never do.Oons, what did my father mean by sticking me up in an university, or to think that I should gain any thing by my head, in a nation whose genius lies all in their heels? Well, if ever I come to have children of my own, they shall have the education of the country; they shall learn to dance before they can walk, and be taught to sing before they can speak.

Mir. Come, come, throw off that childish humour, put on assurance, there's no avoiding it; stand all hazards, thou'rt a stout lusty fellow, and hast a good estate; look bluff, Hector, you have a good side-box face, a pretty impudent face; so that's pretty well.This fellow went abroad like an ox, and is return'd like [Aside.

an ass.

Dur. Let me see now how I look. [Pulls out a Pocket-glass, and looks on't] A side-box face, say you? -'Egad, I don't like it, Mirabel.-Fie, sir, don't abuse your friends, I could not wear such a face for the best countess in Christendom.

Mir. Why can't you, blockhead, as well as I?

Dur. Why, thou hast impudence to set a good face upon any thing; I would change half my gold for half thy brass with all my heart. Who comes here? Odso, Mirabel, your father!

Enter Old MIRABEL.

O. Mir. Where's Bob? dear Bob?
Mir. Your blessing, sir.

O. Mir. My blessing! Damn ye, ye young rogue; why did not you come to see your father first, sirrah? My dear boy, I am heartily glad to see thee, my dear child, faith-Captain Duretete, by the blood of the Mirabels, I'm yours-well, my lads, ye look bravely, faith.-Bob, hast got any money left?

Mir. Not a farthing, sir.

O. Mir. Why, then I won't gi' thee a souse.
Mir. I did but jest, here's ten pistoles.

O. Mir. Why, then here's ten more; I love to be charitable to those that don't want it :-Well, and how d'ye like Italy, my boys?

Mir. O the garden of the world, sir; Rome, Naples, Venice, Milan, and a thousand others-all fine.

O. Mir. Ay, say you so? And they say, that Chiari is very fine too.

Dur. Indifferent, sir, very indifferent; a very scurvy air; the most unwholesome to a French constitution in the world.

Mir. Pshaw, nothing on't; these rascally gazetteers have misinform'd you.

O. Mir. Misinform'd me! Oons, sir, were not we beaten there?

Mir. Beaten, sir! the French beaten!

O. Mir. Why, how was it, pray, sweet sir?
Mir. Sir, the captain will tell you.

Dur. No, sir, your son will tell you.

Mir. The captain was in the action, sir.

Dur. Your son saw more than I, sir, for he was a looker on.

O. Mir. Confound you both for a brace of cowards: here are no Germans to overhear you; why don't ye tell me how it was?

Mir. Why, then you must know, that we marched up a body of the finest, bravest, well-dressed fellows in the universe; our commander's at the head of us, all lace and feather, like so many beaux at a ball—I don't

believe there was a man of 'em but could dance a charmer, morbleau.

0. Mir. Dance! very well, pretty fellows, faith! Mir. We caper'd up to their very trenches, and there saw peeping over a parcel of scarecrow, olivecolour'd, gunpowder fellows, as ugly as the devil.

Dur. 'Egad, I shall never forget the looks of 'em while I have breath to fetch.

Mir. They were so civil indeed as to welcome us with their cannon; but for the rest, we found 'em such unmannerly, rude, unsociable dogs, that we grew tir'd of their company, and so we e'en danc'd back again. O. Mir. And did ye all come back?

Mir. No, two or three thousand of us stay'd behind. O. Mir. Why, Bob, why?

Mir. Pshaw-because they could not come that night. But come, sir, we were talking of something else: pray how does your lovely charge, the fair Oriana?

O. Mir. Ripe, sir, just ripe; you'll find it better engaging with her than with the Germans, let me tell you. And what would you say, my young Mars, if I had a Venus for thee too? Come, Bob, your apartment is ready, and pray let your friend be my guest too; you shall command the house between ye, and I'll be as merry as the best of you. [Exeunt.