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your teeth on edge. All of them have their teeth in perfection.

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Squire. Thanks to the Chevalier, your den

tist.

Mother. And not a single grey hair on their heads.

Squire. That's more owing to the peruquemaker, than to their youth.

Mother. No; not one above twenty-two, as I'm an honest woman!

Squire. I believe the one as much as the other. It seems, then, that I've lost my la-

bour.

Mother. (curtseying.) Unless my years may obtain favour in your sight. But I doubt whether I have the proper testimonials engraved on my forehead.

Squire. Oh, you've too humble an opinion of yourself. If you have consulted your glass to-day, you must have seen marks of that which will ever command respect.

Mother. Oh I won't pretend to enter the lists with your old widow in that respect; where I've one wrinkle, she has ten; and therefore, in your eyes, she is ten times more amiable. Well, 1

I shall, perhaps, be old enough in time to have you for an admirer; but then you may be like old Lord Queensware; you will relish nothing but green fruit. Poor old soul! The last night he was here, coughing out some gallant things to a young new comer, I verily thought he would have coughed out his last tooth with them.

Bess Bloomer. Be quiet, Mr. Merryman, I Vow and protest, you'll do me chief.

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Squire. Al, Dickey, what are you about there? You will always be driving the girls up into a corner.

Mother. Why do you make such an outcry, Bess Bloomer? To my certain knowledge, you ought to have done with that folly, at least, two years ago.

Bess Bloomer. Lord, I'm not afraid of him, if he will keep his face farther off; but he sticks his fiery nose so close to my face that I'm afraid, he'll singe some of my curls..

All. Ha! ha! ha!

Squire. Why, Dickey, that comet of yours is a terror to every body; it would make a good

gunner's linstock. 'Tis lucky we are not in a powder magazine.

Merryman. There may be some inflammables here for all that.

Bess Bloomer. Then to guard against accidents, you had better quench your nose in a bowl of wine.

Mother. Well mentioned, Bess. I suppose you mean to give us a supper, Squire, since it is so long since we had one at your expense?

Squire. Aye, aye, let us play a scene or two of the Strangers at Home!

Mother. Shall I order the supper?

Squire. Yes-let it be good; and send in some wine whilst it is getting ready.

Merryman. Aye, aye, let's have in the decanters, and, d'ye hear? Don't forget some brandy; for really the wine is so intolerable now-a-days, that brandy is indispensably necessary to qualify it for drinking.

Mother. Well, I will go and give the necessary orders.

[Exit. Squire. Come, lads and lasses! let's be seated; every turtle by his mate. How shall we amuse

ourselves? What say you to a song?-Come, I'll begin a favourite Glee, and see that you all play your parts.

GLEE.

When Arthur first at court began
To wear long hanging sleeves,
He entertain'd three serving men,
And all of them were thieves, &c. &c.

[Scene closes.

CHAPTER XIV.

CONTAINS OTHER SCENES FROM THE SAME COMEDY.

SCENE.-A Street at dead of night.

Enter the Squire and his Party, much inebriated.

Squire. WELL, my boys, what frolic shall we go upon next?

Cutlas. Oh! if we can find nothing else to do, there are plenty of watchmen asleep at this hour; we'll take away their lanthorns, and beat them about their heads, if they have the impudence to wake.

Watchman. (without.) Past two o'clock !

Cutlas. Here's one of them awake for a wonder, but by his brogue, he's an Irishman that has blundered out in his sleep.

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