stood upon my head or my heels? What the devil had I to do in parliament? What's my country to me? Lady Con. Who mentioned your country, sir?

Sir Bash. I desire you won't mention it-I have nothing to do with it.-No, nor with your debts-I have nothing to do with them; and I desire you will tell your people to come no more after me.— -I know how to prevent that-notice in the Gazette will exempt me from your extravagancies.-I did not live in the Temple for nothing!

Fur. I protest I never heard any body talk so mean in all my days before.

Lady Con. Don't you be so pert, pray.-Leave the room- -go both of you down stairs.

[Exeunt FURNISH and SIDEBOARD. Sir Bash. I have kept it up pretty well before my servants. She's a fine woman, and talks admirably!

[Aside.

Lady Con. Is there never to be an end of this usage, Sir Bashful? Am I to be for ever made unhappy by your humours?

Sir Bash. Humours!-I like that expression prodigiously!-Humours indeed!

Lady Con. You may harp upon the word, sir.-Humours you have, sir, and such as are become insupportable.

Sir Bash. She talks like an angel! [Aside.] Madam, [moderating his voice] I should have no humours, as you call them, if your extravagancies were not insupportable. What would the world say?—Let us canvass the matter quietly and easily-what would the world think of my understanding, if I was seen to encourage your way of life?

Lady Con. What will they think of it now, sir?Take this along with you, there is a certain set of people, who, when they would avoid an error, are sure to fall into the opposite extreme.

Sir Bash. There's for you!That's a translation from Horace-Dum vitant stulti vitia.-O, she is a notable woman! Aside.

Lady Con. Let me tell you, Sir Bashful, there is not in the world a more ridiculous sight, than a person wrapping up himself in imaginary wisdom-if he can but guard against one giant-vice, while he becomes an easy prey to a thousand other absurdities.

Sir Bash. Lord, I am nothing at all to her in an argument! She has a tongue that can reason me out of my senses-I could almost find in my heart to tell her the whole truth.- [Aside.] Lookye, madam, you know I am good-natur'd at the bottom, and any thing in reason

Lady Con. When did I desire any thing else?-Is it unreasonable to live with decency? Is it unreasonable to keep the company I have always been us'd to ?—Is it unreasonable to conform to the modes of life, when our own fortune can so well afford it?

Sir Bash. She's a very reasonable woman, and I wish I had but half her sense! [Aside.] I'll tell you what, my Lady Constant, to avoid eternal disputes, if á sum of money, within moderate compass, would make matters easy-I know you have contracted habits in lifeand I know the force of habit is not easily conquer❜d.— I would not have her conquer it: my pride would be hurt if she did. [Aside.] And so, madam, if a brace of hundreds-why should not I give her three hundred! [Aside.] I did not care if I went as far as three hundred-if three hundred pounds, my Lady Constant, will settle the matter-why, as to the matter of three hundred pounds

Enter FURNISH, with a bandbox.

Fur. Your ladyship's things are come home from the milliner's. [Showing the bandbox. Sir Bash. Zookers! this woman has overheard me!

[Aside.] As to the matter of three hundred pounds, madam, [loud, in a passion] let me tell you it is a very large sum-ask me for three hundred pounds, madam! -Do you take me for a blockhead?

Lady Con. What does the man fly out so for?

Sir Bash. What right have you to three hundred pounds? I will allow no such doings-is not my house an eternal scene of your routs, and your drums, and your what-dye-call-'ems?-Don't I often come home when the hall is barricado'd with powder-monkey servants, that I can hardly get within my own doors?

Lady Con. What is the meaning of all this, sir?

Sir Bash. Have not I seen you at a game at loo, put the fee simple of a score of my best acres upon a single card? And have not I mutter'd to myself-If that woman now were as much in love with me, as she is with pam, what an excellent wife she would make?

Lady Con. Yes, I have great reason to love you, truly!

Sir Bash. Death and fire!-You are so fond of play, that I should not wonder to see my child resemble one of the court cards, or mark'd in the forehead with a pair-royal of aces. I tell you, once for all, you are an ungovernable woman-your imaginations are as wild as any woman's in Bedlam.-Do go thither, go; for I tell you, once for all, I'll allow no such doings in my house. [Exit SIR BASHFUL. Lady Con. His head is certainly turn'd!-Did any body ever see such behaviour?

Fur. See it!--no, nor bear it neither.-Your ladyship will never be rightly at ease, I'm afraid, till you part with him.

Lady Con. Oh, never; it is impossible!-He not only has lost all decency, but seems to me to have bid adieu to all humanity. That it should be my fate to be married to such a quicksand! But I'll think no more of him.

Fur. Oh, madam, I had quite forgot; Mrs. Love. more's servant is below, and desires to know if your ladyship would be at home this morning.

Lady Con. Yes, I shall be at home.-Step with me to my room, and I'll give you a card to send Mrs. Lovemore. Of all things let a woman be careful how she marries a narrow-minded, under-bred husband.

Enter SIR BASHFUL and LOVEMore.

[Exeunt.

Sir Bash. Walk in, Mr. Lovemore, walk in!-I am heartily glad to see you!-This is kind.

Love. I am ready, you see, to attend the call of friendship.

Sir Bash. Mr. Lovemore, you are a friend indeed. Love. You do me honour, Sir Bashful.-Pray how does my lady?

Sir Bash. Perfectly well!-I never saw her look better. We have had t'other skirmish since I saw you, Love. Another?

Sir Bash. Ay, another!—and I did not bate her an ace. But I told you I had something for your private ear-Pray now, have you remark'd any thing odd or singular in me?

Love. Not the least-I never knew a man with less oddity in my life.

Sir Bash. What, nothing at all? He, he! [Smiles at him.] Have you remark'd nothing about my wife? Love. You don't live happy with her-but that is not singular.

Sir Bash. Po!-I tell you, Mr. Lovemore, I am at the bottom a very odd fellow.

Love. Not at all.

Sir Bash. Yes, yes, yes,-I am-I am indeed-as old a fish as lives-and you must have seen it before

now.

Love. Not I, truly! You are not jealous, I hope?

Sir Bash. You have not hit the right nail o'the -no-no-not jealous. Do her justice, I am

head-r

secure there-my lady has high notions of honour. It

is not that.

Love. What then?

Sir Bash. Can't you guess?

Love. Not I, upon my soul!-Explain.

Sir Bash. He, he! [Smiling and looking simple.] You could never have imagined it-I blush at the very thoughts of it. [Turns away.

Love. Come, come, be a man, Sir Bashful-out with it at once, let me be of your council

Sir Bash. Mr. Lovemore, I doubt you, and yet esteem you. Some men there are, who when a confidence is once repos'd in them, take occasion from thence to hold a hank over their friend, and tyrannize him all the rest of his days.

Love. Oh fie!-This is ungenerous!-True friendship is of another quality-it feels from sympathy, and is guarded by honour.

Sir Bash. Mr. Lovemore, I have no further doubt of you-and so- -Stay, stay a moment-let me just step to the door.

[Goes on tiptoe. [Aside.

Love. Jealousy has laid hold of him.
Sir Bash. Servants have a way of listening.

[Pushes the door open with both hands. Love. He has it, through his very brain! [Aside. What has he got in his head?

Sir Bash. No, no- —all's safe—there was nobody. Mr. Lovemore, I will make you the depositary-the faithful depositary, of a secret, which to you will appear a mystery. My inclinations, Mr. Lovemore-nay, but you'll laugh at me.

Love. No-upon my honour!-No, no.

Sir Bash. Well, well, well.-My inclinations, I say, are changed-no, not changed-but-they are not what