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impudent piece of brass that ever spoke with a for a man. Certainly, we don't meet many such at tongue. He has taken possession of the easy chair a horse-race in the country. by the fireside already. He took off his boots in the Hard. If we should find him so—but that's impos. parlour, and desired me to see them taken care of. sible. The first appearance has done my business. I'm desirous to know how his impudence affects my I'm seldom deceived in that. daughter: she will certainly be shocked at it,

Miss H. And yet, there may be many good qualiEnter Miss HARDCASTLE, plainly dressed. ties under that first appearance. But as one of us Well

, Kate, I see you have changed your dress as I must be mistaken, what if we go to make further bid you; and yet, I think, there was no great oc- discoveries ? casion.

Hard. Agreed. But depend on't, I'm in the right. Miss A. I find such a pleasure, sir, in obeying Miss H. And depend on't, I'm not much in the your commands, that I take care to observe them, wrong.

(Exeunt. without ever debating their propriety,

Enter Tony, running in with a casket.. Hard. And yet, Kate, I sometimes give you some Tony. Ecod, I have got them. Here they are. cause, particularly when I recommended my modest My cousin Con's necklaces, bobs and all. Mv gentleman to you as a lover to-day,

mother sha'n't cheat the poor souls out of their Miss H. You taught me to expect something ex- fortin, neither. O! my genius, is that you ? traordinary, and I find the original exceeds the de

Enter HASTINGS. scription.

Hast. My dear friend, how have you managed Hard. I was never so surprised in my life. He with your mother! I hope you have amused her has quite confounded all my faculties.

with pretending love for your cousin, and that you Miss H. I never saw anything like it; and a man are willing to be reconciled at last. Our horses will of the world, too!

be refreshed in a short time, and we shall soon be Hard. Ay, he learned it all abroad.

ready to set off. Miss H. It seems all natural to him.

Tony. And here's something to hear your charges Hard. A good deal assisted by bad company, and by the way. [Giving the casket.] Your sweethcart's a French dancing-master.

jewels. Keep them, and hang those, I say, that Miss H. Sure, you mistake, papa! A French would rob you of one of them. dancing-master could never have taught him that Hast. But how have you procured them from your timid look, that awkward address, that bashful mother? manner

Tony. Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no Hard. Whose look? whose manner, child ? fibs. 1 procured them by the rule of thumb. If I

Miss H. Mr. Marlow's. His mauvaise honte, his had not a key to every drawer in mother's bureau, timidity, struck me at first sight.

how could I go to the alehouse so uften as I do? Hard. Then your first sight deceived you; for I An honest man may rob himself of his own at any think him one of the most brazen first sights that time. ever astonished my senses.

Hast. Thousands do it every day. But, to be plain Miss H. Sure, sir, you rally! I never saw any one with you, Miss Neville is endeavouring to procure so modest.

them from her aunt this very instant. If she suc. Hard. And can you be serious ? I never saw such ceeds, it will be the most delicate way, at least, of a bouncing, swaggering puppy since I was born. obtaining them. Bully Dawson was but a fool to him.

Tony. Well, keep them till you know how it will Miss H. Surprising ! He met me with a respectful be. But I know how it will be well enough; she'd bow, a stammering voice, and a look fixed on the as soon part with the only sound tooth in her head. ground.

Hast. But I dread the effects of her resentment, Hard. He met me with a loud voice, a lordly air, when she finds she has lost them. and a familiarity that made my blood freeze again. Tony. Never you mind her resentment; leave me

Miss H. He treated me with diffidence and re- to manage that. I don't value her resentment the spect; censured the manners of the age; admired bounce of a cracker. Zounds! here they are. Morthe prudence of girls that never laughed; tired me rice ;-prance.

[Exit Hastings. with apologies for being tiresome; and then left the Enter Mrs. HARDCASTLE and Miss NEVILLE. room with a bow, and, Madam, I would not for the Mrs. H. Indeed, Constance, you amaze me. Such world detain you.'

a girl as you want jewels! It will be time enough Hard. He spoke to me as if he knew me all his for jewels, my dear, twenty years hence, when your life before ;-asked twenty questions, and never beauty begins to want repairs. waited for an answer ;-interrupted my best remarks. Miss N. But what will repair beauty at forty, will with some silly pun; and when I was in my best certainly improve it at twenty, madam. story of the Duke of Marlborough and Prince Mrs. H. Your's, my dear, can admit of none. Eugene, he asked if I was not a good hand at mak- That natural blush' is beyond a thousand ornaments. ing punch. Yes, Kate, he asked your father if he Besides, child, jewels are quite out at present. Don't was a maker of punch!

you see half the ladies of our acquaintance, my Lady Miss H. One of us must certainly be mistaken. Kill-day-light, and Mrs. Crump, and the rest of

Hard. If he be what he has shewn himself, I'm them, carry their jewels to town, and bring nothing determined he shall never have my consent.

but paste and marcasites back ? Miss H. And if he be the sullen thing I take him, Miss N. But who knows, madam, but somebody he shall never have mine.

that shall be nameless, would like me best with all Hard. In one thing, then, we are agreed—to re- my finery about me? ject him.

'Mrs. H. Consult your glass, my dear, and then Miss H. Yes, but upon conditions; for if you see if, with such a pair of eyes, you want any better should find him less impudent, and I more presum- sparklers. What do you think, Tony, my dear, does ing; if you find him more respectful, and I more im- your cousin Con. want any jewels, in your eyes, to portunaie-I don't know the fellow is well enough set off her beauty ?

Tony. That's as hereafter may be.

Tony. Stick to that. Ha! ha! ha! stick to that. Miss N. My dear aunt, if you knew how it would call me to bear witness. oblige me.

Mrs. H. I tell you, Tony, by all that's precious Mrs. H. A parcel of old-fashioned rose and table. the jewels are gone, and I shall be ruined for eter. cut things. They would make you look like the Tony. Sure I know they're gone, and I am to court of King Solomon at a puppet-show. Besides, say so. I believe I can't readily come at them. They may Mrs. H. My dearest Tony, but hear me. They're be missing, for aught I know to the contrary. gone, I say,

Tony. Apart to Mrs. H.] Then why don't you Tony. By the laws, mamma, you make me for to
tell her so at once, as she's so longing for them ? laugh, ha! ha! ha! I know who took them well
Tell her they're lost. It's the only way to quiet her. enough, ha! ha! ha!
Say they're lost, and call me to bear witness.

Mrs. H. Was there ever such a blockhead, that
Mrs. H. (Apart to Tony.) You know, my dear, can't tell the difference between jest and earnest. I
I'm only keeping them for you. So, if I say they're tell you I'm not in jest booby.
gone, you'll bear me witness, will you ? He! he! he! Tony. That's right, that's right: you must be in a

Tony. Never fear me. Ecod! I'll say I saw them bitter passion, and then nobody will suspect either of taken out with my own eyes. [Aside to Mrs. H.] us. I'll bear witness that they are gone.

Miss N. I desire them but for one day, madam. Mrs. H. Can you bear witness that you're no Just to be permitted to shew them as relics, and then better than a fool ? Was ever poor woman so beset they may be locked up again.

with fools on one hand, and thieves on the other ? Mrs. H. To be plain with you, my dear Constance, Tony. I can bear witness to that. if I could find them, you should have them. They're Mrs. H. Bear witness again, you blockhead you, missing, I assure you Lost, for aught I know; and I'll turn you out of the room directly. My poor but we must have patience wherever they are. niece, what will become of her? Do you laugh, you

Miss N. I'll not believe it; it is but a shallow unfeeling brute, as if you enjoy'd my distress ? pretence to deny me. I know they're too valuable Tony. I can bear witness to that. to be so slightly kept As you are to answer for the Mrs. H. Do you insult me, monster? I'll teach loss

you to vex your mother, I will. Mrs. H. Don't be alarmid, Constance. If they Tony. I can bear witness to that. [Ereunt. be lost, I must restore an equivalent. But my son Enter Miss HARDCASTLE and Maid. knows they are missing and not to be found.

Miss H. What an unaccountable creature is that Tony. That I can bear witness to. They are miss- brother of mine, to send them to the house as an inn: ing and not to be found, I'll take my oath on't. ha! ha! ha! I don't wonder at his impudence.

Mrs. H. You must learn resignation, my dear; Maid. But what is more, madam, the young genfor though we lose our fortune, yet we should not tleman, as you pass'd by in your present dress, ask'd lose our patience. See me, how calm I am. me if you were the bar-maid. He mistook you for

Miss N. Ay, people are generally calm at the the bar-maid, madam. misfortunes of others.

Miss H. Did he? Then, as I live, I'm resolv'd to Mrs. H. Now I wonder a girl of your good sense keep up the delusion. Tell me, how do you like my should waste a thought upon such 'trumpery. We present dress ? Don't you think I look something shall soon find them; and, in the meantime, you like Cherry, in the Beaux' Stratagem? shall make use of my garnets till your jewels be found. Maid. It's the dress, madam, that every lady Miss N. I detest garnets !

wears in the country, but when she visits or receives Mrs. H. The most becoming thiugs in the world, company, to set off a clear complexion. You have often seen Miss it. And are you sure he don't remember my how well they look upon me. You shall have them. face or person ?

[Erit. Maid. Certain of it. Miss N. Was ever anything so provoking, to mis- Miss H. I vow I thought so; for though we spoke lay my own jewels, and force me to wear trumpery. for some time together, yet his fears were such, that

Tony. Don't be a fool. If she gives you the gar- he never once looked up during the interview. nets, take what you can get. The jewels are your Indeed, if he had, my bonnet would have kept him own already. I have stolen them out of her bureau, from seeing me. and she does not know it. Fly to your spark, he'll Maid. But what do you hope from keeping him in tell you more of the matter. Leave me tó ma- his mistake. nage her.

Miss H. In the first place, I shall be seen; and Miss N. My dear cousin!

{E.cit. that is no small advantage to a girl who brings her Tony. Vanish! She's here; and has missed them face to market. Then I shall perhaps make an already. Zounds ! how she fidgets and spits about acquaintance; and that is no small victory gained over like a Catherine wheel!

one who never addresses any but the vilest of her sex. Enter Mrs. HARDCASTLE.

But my chief aim is to take my gentleman off his Mrs. H. Confusion! thieves ! robbers! We are guard; and like an invisible champion of romance, cheated, plundered, broke open, undone.

examine the giant's force before I offer to combat. Tony. What's the matter, what's the matter, Maid. But are you sure you can act your part, and mamma?. I hope nothing has happened to any of disguise your voice, so that he may mistake that, as the good family.

he has already mistaken your person? Mrs. H. We are robbed. My bureau has been Miss H. Never fear me; I think I have got the broken open, the jewels taken out, and I'm

undone. true bar cant. Did your honour call? Attend the Tony. O! is that all? ha! ha! ha! By the laws, Lion there : pipes and tcbacco for the Angel : the I never saw it better acted in my life.' Ecod! I Lamb has been outrageous this half hour. thought you was ruined in earnest, ha! ha! ha! Maid. It will do, madam; but he's here. [Erit Mrs. H. Why, boy, I am ruined in earnest. My

Enter MARLOW. bureau has been broken open, and all taken away. Mar. What a bawling in every part of the house .

I have scarce a moment's repose. If I go to the Mar. Yes, my dear, a great favourite. And yet best room, there I find my host and his story. If I hang me, I don't see what they see in me to follow. fly to the gallery, there we have my hostess with her at the ladies' club in town, I'm called their agreeacurtsy down to the ground. I have at last got a ble Rattle. Rattle, child, is not my real name, but moment to myself, and now for recollection. one I'm known by. My name is Solomons. Mr.

Miss H. Did you call, sir? Did your honour call ? Solomons, my dear, at your service. Offering to

Mar. (Musing. As for Miss Hardcastle she's too salute her.] grave and sentimental for me.

Miss H. Hold, sir! you were introducing me to Miss H. Did your honour call ?

your club, not to yourself. And you're so great a Mar. No, child. (Musing.) Besides, from the favourite there, you say? glimpse I nad of her, I think she squints.

Mar. Yes, my dear. There's Mrs. Mantrap, Miss H. I'm sure, sir, I heard the bell ring., Lady Betty Blackleg, the Countess of Sligo, Mrs.

Mar. No, no. (Musing.) I have pleased my Longhorns, old Miss Biddy Buckshin, and your father, however, by coming down, and I'll to-morrow bumble servant, keep up the spirit of the place. please myself by returning. (Taking out his Miss H. Then it's a very merry place, I suppose ? tablets and perusing )

Mar. Yes; as merry as cards, supper, wine, and Msss H. Perhaps the other gentleman, called, sir. old women can make us. Mar. I tell you no.

Miss H. And their agreeable Rattle! ha, ha, ha! Miss H, I should be glad to know, sir. We have Mar. Egad! I don't quite like this chit. She such a parcel of servants.

looks knowing, methinks. [Aside.) You laugh, Mar. No, no, I tell you. (Looks full in her face.] child. Yes, child, I think I did call. I wanted—I wanted Miss H. I can't but laugh to think what time -I vow, child, you are vastly handsome.

they all have for minding their work or their family. Miss H. O la, sir, you'll make one ashamed. Mar. All's well; she don't laugh at me. (Aside.]

Mar. Never saw a more sprightly, malicious eye. Do you ever work, child ? Yes, yes, my dear, I did call . Have you got any Miss H. Ay, sure.

There's not a screen or å of your-a-what d'ye call it, in the house ? quilt in the whole house but can bear witness to that.

Miss H. No, sir, we have been out of that these Mar. Odso! then you must shew me your emten days.

broidery. I embroider and draw patterns myself a Mar. One may call in this house, I find, to very little. "If you want a judge of your work, you must little purpose. Suppose I should call for a taste, apply to me. (Seising her hand.] just by the way of trial, of the nectar of your lips, Miss H. Ay, but the colours don't look well by perhaps I might be disappointed in that too. candle-light. You shall see all in the morning.

Miss H. Nectar! nectar! that's a liquor there's Mar. And why not now, my angel ? Such beauty no call for in these parts. French, I suppose. We fires beyond the power of resistance.-Psha! the keep no French wines her, sir.

father here! My old luck! I never nicked seven, Mar. Of true English growth, I assure you. that I did not throw ames the aces three times Miss H. Then it's odd I should not know it. We following.

[Exis. brew all sorts of wines in this house, and I have Enter HARDCASTLE, who stands in surprise. lived here these eighteen years.

Hard. So, madam! so, I find this is your modest Mar. Eighteen years! Why, one would think, lover; this is your humble admirer, that keeps his child, you kept the bar before you were born. How eyes fixed on the ground, and only adored at humble old are you?

distance.-Kate, Kate, art thou not ashamed to deMiss H. O! sir! I must not tell my age. They ceive your father so? say women and music should never be dated.

Miss H. Never trust me, my dear papa, but he's Mar. To guess at this distance, you can't be much still the modest man I first took him for; you'll be above forty. (Approaching.) Yet nearer I don't convinced of it as well as I. think so much. (Approaching.) By coming close Hard. By the hand of my body, I believe his imto some women they look younger still: but when pudence is infectious ! Didn't I see him seize your we come very close indeed—[ Attempting to kiss hand? Did'nt I see him haul you about like her.]

milk maid? and now you talk of his respect and his Miss H. Pray, sir, keep your distance. One modesty, forsooth! would think you wanted to know one's age, as they Miss H. But if I shortly convince you of his do horses, by mark of mouth.

modesty, that he has only the faults that will pass Mar. I protest, child, you use me extremely ill. off with time, and the virtues that will improve with If you keep me at this distance, how is it possible age, I hope you'll forgive him. you and I can ever be acquainted ?

Hard. The girl would actually make one run mad Miss HI. And who wants to be acquainted with I tell you I'll not be convinced. I am convinced you? I want no such acquaintance, not I. l'm He has scarcely been three hours in the house, and sure you did not treat Miss Hardcastle that was he has already encroached on all my prerogatives. here awhile ago in this obstropolous manner. I'll You may. like his impudence, and call it modesty; warrant me, before her you look dash’d, and kept but my son-in-law, madam, must have very dif. bowing to the ground, and talk’d, for all the world, ferent qualifications. as if you was before a justice of the peace.

Miss H. Sir, I ask but this night to convince you. Mar. Egad! she has hit it sure enough. (Aside. Hard You shall not have half the time; for I In awe of her, child ? ha, ha, ha! A mere awkward, have thougths of turning him out this very hour. squinting thing. No, no; I find you don't know Miss H. Give me that hour, then, and I hope to me. I laughed and rallied her a little; but I was satisfy you. unwilling to be too severe. No, I could not be too Hard. Well, an hour let it be then. But I'll sovere, curse me!

have no trifling with your father : all fair and open, Miss H. O! then, sir, you are a favourite, I find, do you mind me?

[Exeunh among the ladies ?


Hast. He must not see my uneasiness. [Aside.] ACT IV

Mar. You seem a little disconcerted, though,

methinks. Sure, nothing has happened? SCENE I.-An old-fashioned House.

Hast. No, nothing. Never was in better spirits

in all my life. And so you left it with the landlady ? Enter Marlow, followed by a Servant.

who, no doubt, very readily undertook the charge. Mar. I wonder what Hastings could mean by Mar. Rather too readily; for she not only kept sending me so valuable a thing as a casket to keep the casket, but through her great precaution, was for him, when he knows the only place I have is going to keep the messenger too. Ha, ha, ha! the seat of a post-coach at an inn-door. Have you Hast. He, he, he! They are safe, however. deposited the casket with the landlady, as I ordered Mar. As a guinea in a miser's purse. you ? Have you put it into her own hands ?

Hast. So, now all hopes of fortune are at an end, Seru. Yes, your honour.

and we must set off without it. Aside.) Well, Mar. She said she'd keep it safe, did she ? Charles, I'll leave you to your meditations on the

Serv. Yes, she said she'd keep it safe enough; she pretty bar-maid; and, he, he, he! may you be as ask'd me how I came by it; and she said she successful for yourself as you have been for me. (Er. had a great mind to make me give an account of Mar. Thank ye, George; I ask no more. Ha, myself.

(Erit. ha, ha! Mar. Ha! ha! ha! they're safe, however. What

Enter HARDCASTLE. an unaccountable set of beings have we got amongst. Hard. I no longer know my own house. It's This little bar-maid, though, runs in my head most turned all topsy-turvey. His servants have got strangely, and drives out the absurdities of all the drunk already. "Pll bear it no longer; and yet for rest of the family. She's mine; she must be mine, my respect for his father, I'll be calm. [Aside. ] or I'm greatly mistaken.

Mr. Marlow, your servant. I'm your very humble Enter HASTINGS.

servant. [Bowing low.] Hast. Bless me! I quite forgot to tell her that Mar. Sir, your humble servant.-What's to be I intended to repair to the bottom of the garden. the wonder now? (Aside.] Marlow here, and in spirits too !

Hard. I believe, sir, you must be sensible, sir, Mar. Give me joy, George! Crown me, shadow that no man alive ought to be more welcome than me with laurels! Well, George, after all, we your father's son, sir. I hope you think so. modest fellows don't want for success among the Mar. I do, from my soul, sir; I don't want much

entreaty. I generally make my father's son welcome Hast. Some women, you mean.

But what success wherever he goes. has your honour's modesty been crown'd with now, Hard. I believe you do, from my soul, sir. But that it grows so insolent upon us ?

though I say nothing to your own conduct, that of Mar. Didn't you see the tempting, brisk, lovely, your servants is insufferable; their manner of drinking little thing that runs about the house with a bunch of is setting a very bad example in this house, I assure keys to her girdle ?

you. Hast. Well, and what then ?

Mar. I protest, my very good sir, that's no fault Mar. She's mine, you rogue, you. Such fire, of mine. If they don't drink as they ought, they such motion, such eyes, such lips—but, egad! she are to blame. I ordered them not to spare the would not let me kiss them though.

cellar; I did, I assure you. Here, let one of my Hast. But are you sure, so very sure of her? servants come up. My positive directions were,

Mar. Why, man, she talk'd of shewing me her that as I did not drink myself, they should make up work above stairs, and I'm to improve the pattern. for my deficiencies below.

Hast. But how can you, Charles, go about to rob Hard. Then they had your orders for what they a woman of her honour ?

do? Mar. Psha! psha! we all know the honour of the Mar. They had, I assure you; you shall hear from bar-maid of an inn. I don't intend to rob her, take one of themselves. (Enter Servant, drunk.] You, Jemy word for it; there's nothing in this house I sha'nt remy! come forward, sirrah? What were my honestly pay for.

orders ? Were you not told to drink freely, and Hast. I believe the girl has virtue. *

call for what you thought fit, for the good of the Mar. And if she has, I should be the last man in house ? the world that would attempt to corrupt it.

Hard. I begin to lose my patience. (Aside.] Hast. You have taken care, I hope, of the casket Jer. Please your honour, liberty and Fleet-street I sent you to lock up? 'Tis in safety ?

for ever! Though I'm but a servant, I'm as good Mar. Yes, yes, it's safe enough; I have taken as another man; I'll drink for no mar before sur care of it. But how could you think the seat of a per, sir, d-e! Good liquor will sit upon a good post-coach at an inn-door a place of safety? Ah, supper, but a good supper will not sit upon-hiccup numskull! I have taken better precautions for you - upon my conscience, sir.

(Exit. than you did for yourself-I have

Mar. You see, my old friend, the fellow's as drunk Hast. What ?

as he possibly can be. I don't know what you'd Mar. I have sent it to the landlady to keep for have more, unless you'd have the poor devil soused you.

in a beer-barrel. Hast. To the landlady!

Hard. Zounds! he'll drive me distracted if I Mar. The landlady.

contain myself any longer (Aside.) Mr. Marlow, Hast. You did ?

sir, I have submitted to your insolence for more Mar. I did. She's to be answerable for its forth. than four hours, and I see no likelihood of its coming, you know.

corning to an end. I'm now resolv'd to be master Hlasi es; she'll bring it forth with a witness. here, sir; and I desire that you and your drunken

Mar. Wisn't I right? I believe you'll allow that pack may leave my house directly. I acted prudently upon this occasion.

Mar. Leave your house !fure you jest, my good

friend. What, when I'm doing what I can to please Mar. So then, all's out, and I have been dyou ?

imposed on. Oh, confound my stupid head! I shall Hard. I tell you, sir, you don't please me; so I be laughed at over the whole town. I shall be stuck desire you'll leave my house.

up in caricatura, in all the print-shops. The DulMar. Sure you cannot be serious. At this time lissimo Macaroni. To mistake this house, of all o'night, and such a night? You only mean to others, for an inn, and my father's old friend for an banter me.

inn-keeper. What a swaggering puppy must he Hard. I tell you, sir, I'm serious; and, now that take me for! what a silly puppy do I find myself! my passions are roused, I say this house is mine, sir; There again, may I be hanged, my dear, but I misthis house is mine, and I command you to leave it took you for

the bar-maid. directly.

1 Miss H. Dear me! dear me! I'm sure there's Mar. Ha, ha, ha! A puddle in a storm. I nothing in my behaviour to put me upon a level shan't stir a step, I assure you. (In a serious tone.) with one of that stamp. This your house, fellow; It's my house; this is my Mar. Nothing, my dear, nothing; but I was in house; mine, while I choose to stay! What right for a list of blunders, and could not help making have you to bid me leave this house, sir? I never you a subscriber. My stupidity saw every thing the heard of such impudence, curse me, never in my wrong way: I mistook your assiduity for assurance, whole life before.

and your simplicity for allurement. But it's all Hard. Nor I, confound me if ever I did. To over-this house I no more show my face in. come to my house, to call for what he likes, to turn Miss H, I hope, sir, I have done nothing to disme out of my own chair, to insult the family, to order oblige you. I'm sure I should be sorry to affront his servants to get drunk, and then to tell me, this any gentleman who has been so polite, and said so house is mine, sir. By all that's impudent, it makes many civil things to me; I'm sure I should be sorry me laugh. Ha! ha! ha! Pray, sir, [bantering '-(pretending to cry) --if he left the family upon my as you take the house, what think you of taking the account. I'm sure I should be sorry people said rest of the furniture ? There's a pair of silver can. any thing amiss, since I have no fortune but my dlesticks, and there's a fire-screen, and a pair of character. bellows, perhaps you may take a fancy to them? Mar. By heaven, she weeps ! This is the first

Mar. Bring me your bill, sir, bring me your bill, mark of tenderness I ever had from a modest woman, and let's make nomore words about it.

and it touches me. (Aside.) Mar. There's a set of prints too. What think Miss H. I'm sure my family is as good as Miss you of the Rake's Progress for your own apartment ? Hardcastle's; and, though I'm poor, that's no great

Mar. Bring me your bill, I say; and I'll leave misfortune to a contented mind; and, until this moyou and your infernal honse directly.

ment, I never thought that it was bad to want forHard. Then there's a bright, brazen warming-pan, tune. that you may see your own brazen face in.

Mar. And why now, my pretty simplicity ? Mar. My bill, sir.

Miss H. Because it puts me at a distance from one Hard. I had forgot the great chair, for your own that if I had a thousand pounds I would give it all to. particular slumbers, after a hearty meal.

Mar. This simplicity bewitches me, so that if I Mar. Zounds! bring me my bill, I say, and let's stay I am undone, I must make one bold effort, and hear no more on't.

leave her. (Aside.) Excuse me, my lovely girl, you Hard. Young man, young man, from your father's are the only part of the family I leave with relueletter to me, I was taught to expect a well-bred, tance. But, to be plain with you, the difference of modest man, as a visitor here; but now I lind him our birth, fortune, and education, makes an honourano better than a coxcomb and a bully; but he will ble connexion impossible; and I can never harbour be down here presently, and shall hear more of it. a thought of seducing simplicity that trusted in my

[Erit. honour; or of bringing ruin upon one, whose only Mar. How's this? Sure I have not mistaken the fault was being too lovely

[Erit. house! Everything looks like an inn : the servants Miss H, I never knew half his merit till now. He cry coming ! the attendance is awkward ; the bar- shall not go, if I have power or art to detain him. maid too to attend us. But she's here, and will I'll still preserve the character in which I stooped further inform me. Whither so fast, child? a word to conquer, but I will undeceive my papa, who perwith you

haps may laugh him out of his resolution. [Exit. Enter Miss HARDCASTLE.

Enter Tony aad Miss NEVILLE. Miss H. Let it be short, then; I'm in a hurry. Tony, Ay, you may steal for yourselves the next I believe he begins to find out his mistake, but it's time; I have done my duty. She has got the jewels too soon quite to undeceive him. (Aside.) again, that's a sure thing; but, she believes it was

Mar. Pray, child, answer me one question. What all a mistake of the servants. are you, and what may your business in this house Miss N. But, my dear cousin, sure you won't forbe ?

sake us in this distress. If she in the least suspects Miss H. A relation of the family, sir.

that I am going off, I shall certainly be locked up, Mar. What, a poor relation ?

or sent to my aunt Pedigree's, which is ten times Miss H. Yes, sir; a poor relation, appointed to worse. keep the keys, and to see that the guests want no- Tony. To be sure, aunts of all kinds are d-d bad thing in my power to give them.

things But what can I do? I have got you a pair Mar. That is, you act as the bar-maid of this inn. of horses that will fly like Whistlejaeket, and I'm

Miss H. Inn!' o la !-what brought that into sure you can't say but I have courted you nicely be. your head? One of the best families in the county fore her face. Here she comes; we must court a Keep an inn! Ha! ha! ha! old Mr. Hardcastle's bit or two more, for fear she should suspect us. house an inn!

(They retire, and seem to fondle. Mar. Mr. Hardcastle's house! Is this house Mr.

Enter Mrs. HARDCASTLE. Harcastle's house, child ?

Mrs. H. Well, I was greatly fluttered, to be sure ; Mis H. Ay, sir, whose else should it be?

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