Jenny. Oh, yes!-I have decorated her out like any king's coach-horse. Sophia. It's very well. Jenny. With her ribands and ringlets stuck about and dangle-ating down her back; and all herSophia. It's very well. It's all very well; but it will be no wedding. Jenny. (As de.) I hope not. Soph a. He told her to her face that he loved me, and offered to give her the money back. He'll never have her.-And if he does I don't care.-I know I shall die broken-hearted, but I don't care. I'll tell all to my dear grandma', for I'll not stay in this wicked city.-No! He sha'n't see me pine away. I know my ghost will haunt him; but I can't help it. I never wished him any harm, and had he but been true-hearted and have waited for me, I would. But it's no matter. He sha'n't see a tear that I shed, nor hear the least sign that I heave. Enter the WIDOW WARREN. Jenny. (Looking, admiring, and walking around her.) Well, ma'am-I declare you're a pictur Widow. Do you think I look tolerably, Jenny? (Walking and surveying herself.)-Shall I do execution? What is the matter, child? Sophia. Mark my words, he'll never have you. [Exit Jenny.] [street door.) Sophia. He never will. (Knocking heard at the Widow. Run, Jenny, see who it is. Go up to your chamber, child. Sophia, (Much agitated.) No. I will stay here. Widow. Begone to your chamber, I say, miss. Sophia. Beat me if you please, kill me, but I will not. Enter JENNY, introducing MR. DORNTON. Dornton. Your humble servant, madam. Widow. Sir, your very most humble servant (With great respect.) [me? Dornton. I presume you are unacquainted with Widow. (Simpering) I believe I can penetrate, sirDornton. Can you, madam? Widow. (With her fan before her face.) You-You come on the-part of-young Mr. Dornton. Dornton. Yes-yes, madam! Widow. And know his father? Dornton. Hem-(Shrugs.) Why Thorgh I have kept him company from the day of his birth to this very hour, they tell me I don't know him yet! Widow. Ay indeed! Is he so odd? Dornton. Sometimes-To my great regret I have sometimes found him a very absurd old gentleman! Widow. I am sorry for it!-Because as I am soon become-hymeneally-his intimate-relation-I (With maidenly affectation). to Dornton. You would wish for a sensible indulgeut -Papa?-(Smiles.) Widow. It's natural, sir. (Simpering.) Dornton. Ha! I dare not say too much in his favour. Widow. Nay, though I have a vast hum-haregard for young Mr. Dornton-I own I have no great predilection of opinion for the father. (Nodding very significantly.) Dornton. (Suddenly.) Nor he for you, madam! Dornton. I am sure so! Widow. I warrant, sir, he is, as you say, a very precise acrimonious person. Dornton. I said no such thing, madam! Widow. Ah! a little caution, sir, to be sure, becomes gentlemen of your cloth. Dornton. Cloth again!-I don't know what you mean by my cloth! but Mr. Dornton, madam, is little older than yourself; nor does he think himself half so repugnant. Widow. Sir! Dornton. (Recollecting himself.) Madam-I-I teg your pardon-I-(Bowing.) Widow. (Knocking heard.) Oh! here, I dare say comes the bridegroom. tell her after this who I am. (Walks up the stage.) Dornton. (Aside.) My curst vivacity! I can never Enter HARRY DORNTON, in haste. Widow. (Eagerly.) Oh, you rover! Harry. Well, my kind widow! (Mr. Dornton turns round at hearing his son's voice, and gradually approaches.) My loving, compassionate widow! I am come post haste to cast myself once more on your bounty! Widow. Hush! [aid! Harry. To intreat instant commiseration, and Widow. Hem! hem! (Aloud.) Dornton. (Surprised.) I do! Widow. (Aside.) It is the parson!-Would you be so indulgent as to be seated, sir? Dornton. Excuse me, madam. Widow. Would you be pleased to take any refreshment, sir? Dornton, Madam! Widow. A morsel of seed-cake, a French biscuit, a bit of orange-loaf, a glass of constantia, or a jelly? -I know these little cordial comforts are agreeable consolations to gentlemen of your cloth. Dornton. (Surveying himself.) Cloth! Harry. I have not a minute to spare! Widow. (Whispers.) He's here! He's come! A waspish, tetchy-Hem!-(Aloud.) Your friend has been here some time, Mr. Dornton! Harry. My friend! What friend? Widow. Your friend the clergyman. (Pointing to Mr. Dornton.) Turning, sees his father at his elbow.) My father! Widow. His father! (A pause.) Dornton. Well, Harry, why do you look so blink? I am glad you are here.- Your coming and the mutual sincerity with which this lady and I have Widow. I do not want the money, sir! Filthy money-(Whimpering restrainea.) And as to what I said, though you have arrested Mr. MilfordHarry. Ha! (Starts, considers and looks at his watch.). [Mr. Dornton Widow. I am sorry-I beg your pardon-And if Dornton. Why don't you speak, Harry? Where are you going? (Harry Dornton crosses hastily.) Come back, Harry!-Stay, I say! Harry. I cannot stay!-I must fly!-My honour is at stake. Exit. Dornton. (Alarmed.) His honour!-His honour at stake!-Here, here, madam!-(Offering money.) Widow. Nay, sir Dornton. 'Sdeath, madam, take your money. (Exit. Widow. Cruel-usage!-Faithless men-BlindStupid! "I'll forsake and forswear the whole sex. (Bursts into tears.) Enter JENNY, with great glee, on tip-toe, as if she had been on the watch. Jenny. Ma'am ma'am! Mr. Goldfinch, ma'am! Widow. Hey! Mr Goldfinch?-Was that what you said, Jenny? (Brightens up.) Where? Jenny. Below, ma'am. I persuaded him to come up, but he is quite surly. Widow. Oh! he is coming? Well! I think I will see him-Yes-I think I will [for me. Jenny. I always told you, ma'am, Mr. Goldfinch Widow. Did you? Jenny. But he says he will have your written promise this very night, or never speak to you more.-I hear him. (Adjusting the Widow's dress.) La, ma'am, you had better give a few touches hereabout. Your eyes will have double the spirit and fire. [Exit. Widow. Will they? Enter GOLDFINCH. Gold. Me flinch? Game to the backbone! [Exit. Re-enter the WIDOW WARREN. Gold. Here I am once more, widow. Widow. Ah, rambler! Gold. Are you cured of the tantarums? Gold. Must I keep my distance? Gold. Am I a gentleman now? Widow. Killing! Gold. Look you, widow, I know your tricks.Skittish! Won't answer the whip! Run out of the course! Take the rest!-So give me your promise. Widow. My promise- ! Gold. Signed and sealed. Widow. Naughty man.-You shan't-I won't let you tyrannise over a palpitating heart! Gold. Palpi- What does she say? Widow. Go, intruder. Gold. Oh! What you won't? Enter MILFORD. Milford. So, Charles; where's the widow? Gold. I'm the lad; all's concluded; going post for old Silky. (Offers to go at every speech, but is eagerly stopped by Milford.) Milford. Silky did you say? Gold. I'm to pay the miserly rascal fifty thousand pounds down. But mum: that's a secret. Milford. You are raving. Gold. Tellee, he has her on the hip; she can't marry without his consent. Milford. But why? Gold. Don't know. The close old rogue won't tell. Has got some deed, he says. Some writing. Milford. Indeed! Gold. Yes; but it's a secret. I shall be a higher fellow than ever, Jack. Go to the second spring meeting-take you with me-come down a few to the sweaters and trainers-the knowing ones-the lads. Get into the secret-lay it on thick-seven hundred to five Favourite against the field. Done! I'll do it again! Done! Five times over. Ditto repeated. Done, done. Off they go! - winner lays by-pretends to want foot-Odds rise hightake 'em-winner whispered lame-lags afterodds higher-and higher. Take 'em-creeps up breathes 'em over the flat-works 'em up hillpasses the distance post-still only second-bettin chair in an uproar-neck to neck-lets him out Dernton. What you will, Harry; do with rre --slows him the whip-shoots by like an arrow what you will. Oh! who would not be a father! -oh! d-o a hollow thing. That's your sort! [Exernt [Erit. SCENE IIL--The House of the Widow Warren Milford. Fifty thousand to Silky for his consent because of some instrument, some writing? If it Enter MILFORD and MR. SULKY. should be the--? It must; by heaven, it must. Milford. The fool, Goldfinch himself, informed [Exit hastily. me, sir, that Silky is to receive fifty thousand pounds for his consent. SCENE II.—The Ring in Hyde Park. Sulky. Fifty thousand ! Zounds! Why then the old scoundrel must have got possession of the will. Enter HARRY DORNTON, looking at his watch. Milford. Which is indubitably meant to be de stroyed. Goldfinch is just retarned with Silky. Harry. How long must I wait? I see nothing of They are now with the widow, all in high glee, and Milford; I'll cut off that bailiff s ears if he has be are coming up here immediately, no doubt to settle trayed me. (Walks about.) the business in private. Enter MR. DORNTON out of breath. Sulky. What can be done? Milford. We must hide ourselves somewhere, Dornton. So, Harry. and spring upon them. Harry. My father again. Sulky. I hate hiding; it's deceit, and deceit is the Dornion. (Panting.) What do you do here, Harry? resource of a rascal. Harry. Sir-I-I want air. Milford. But there is no avoiding it. We canDornton. So do I; a pretty dance you have led pot get legal assistance in time. Here are two me. What brought you hither? (Sudden recollec- closets, do you go into one, and I'll shut myself up tion.) Where's the money you had of the widow? in the other. We shall hear what they are about, (Pause; seeming to dread an answer.) Where is the and can burst upon them at the proper moment. money, Harry? Sulky. Well, if it must be so; but it's & vile, Harry. (Reluctantly.) Gone, sir. paltry refuge. Dornton. Gone! Milf I hear them coming; make haste. Harry. Most of it, [Exeunt Sulky and Milford into the closels. Dornton. And your creditors not paid? (Another pause.) And your creditors not paid ? Enter SILKY, WIDOW, and GOLDFINCH. Harry. No, sir. Sil. Ha, ha, ha! I told you, madam, I should Dornton. I suspected—I foreboded this. (Farry hear from you when you wanted me; I knew it Dornton walks up the stage.) He has been at some must come to that. But you are a lucky man, Mr. gaming-house, lost all, quarrelled, and come here Goldfinch, and I'm a lucky man; ay, and you are a to put a miserable end to a miserable existence. lucky woman too, madam. We are all in luck. Oh! who would be a father! (With extreme an- Gold. Ay, d-e, old one, you have been concerned guish.) in many a good thing in your time. Enter Waiter. Sil. Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha! To be sure I have. I must provide for my family, Mr. Goldfinch. Waiter. (Looking round, serveying Mr. Dornton.) Widow. It is indeed a fortunate event. Do you Pray, sir, is your name Dornton? not participate my raptures, Mr. Goldfinch ? Dornton. It is. Gold. To be sure: it's a deep scheme; it's knowWaiter. Then I am right. Mr. Milford, sir, has ing a thing or two; eh, old one? Pigeoning the sent nie with this note. [Erit. greenhorns. Harry. (Advancing.) It is for me, sir. Sil. All so safe, too, so snug. I am so pleased, Dornton. How do you know, Harry? and so happy; it's all our own; not a soul will know Harry. Sir, I am certain. I must beg of it but our three selves. Dornton. This is no time for ceremony. (Reads.) Gold. Oh, yes; one more, old one. Dear Harry, forgive the provocation I have given you; Sil. (Alar med.) Ay, who? who? forgive the wrong I have done your father. -Me!-1 Gold. Your father, Belzebub. will submit to any disgrace rather than lift my hand Sil. Lord! Mr. Goldfinch, don't terrify me. against your life. I would have come and apologised Widov. To be sure, it must be owned you are a even on my knees, but am prevented. shocking old rogue, Mr. Silky. But there is no J. MILFORD. doing without you. So a ake haste with your deeds (Stands a moment, crumpling the letter.) Why, and your extortions; for really we should be very Harry! What? What is this? Tell me, tell me. glad to be rid of your company. It is in paying Milford's debts you have expended Sil. Well, well, I'm ready; I'll not long interHarry. It is, sir. [the money? rupt you amorous haste. I am a man of business; Dornton. (Af er raising his clasped hands in rapture, I expected how it would be, and have a legal inas if to return thanks, suddenly suppresses his feelings.) strument here, ready drawn up by my own hand; But how had he wronged me? Why did you come which, when it is signed and sealed, will make ali here to fight him ? Widow. But where is the will? (safe. Harry. Sir-He-he spoke disrespectfully of you. Sil. Oh, I have it. First, however, let us be ser (A pause) cure. (Locks both the chamber doors; is going to read, Dornton. (With his ey's fired on his son, till unable but looks round, sees the clo et doors, and with great any longer to contain hin elf he covers them with one anxiety and cunning locks them too.) hand and stretches out the other.) Harry! Gold. You're an old trader in sin. There's no Harry. (Taking his father's hand but turning his being too deep for you. back likeurise to conceal his agitation.) My father! [linch? Sil. Ah, ha, ha, ha! Do you think so, Mr. GoldDornton. Harry! Harry! (With struggling affec Gold. But I should like to see you on your deathtion) (A pause.) [ford. bed. (A blow from one of the closets.) Harry. Dear sir, let us fly to console poor Mil- Sil. Bless my soul! What's that? ROAD TO RUIN. -1.5 Gold. Zounds! odd enough. I believe he'l.com-' Donunton, I knew yout father, sir : 'tis happy for ing for you before your time. him that he is dead; if you will försake these Winery strane semble ! courses and apply to trade--(Gold. starts from the Widow. Come, come, let us get the shocking busi- Gold. Damn trade! Who's for the spring meetness over. Where is the will? ing? Cross 'em and wind 'em! Seven to five you Gold. Don't shake so, man. don't name the winner! I'm for life and a curricle! Sil. Well, well. First sign the bond. (Widow A cut at the caster, and the long odds! Damn and Goldfinch guing to sign, another knock heard.) trade. The four aces, a back hand, and a lucky Lord have mercy upon me! nick! I'm a deep one! That's your sort. [Exit. Gold. I smell sulphur. Sulky. And now, madamWidow. Save me, Mr. Goldfinch. Widor. Keep off, monster! You smell of malice, Sil. The candles burn blue. (A pause.) cruelty, and persecution. Gold. Psha! Zounds, it's only some cat in the Sulky. No, madam: I smell of honesty. A drug Sil. I heard it in both the closets. [closet. you nauseate, but with which you must forcibly be Gold. Why then there are two cats. Come, I'll dosed! I have glanced over the will, and find I sign:-(Widow and Goldfinch sign the bond.) have the power. 3 Sil. Where's the promise ? Widow. Let me go, goblin! You are a hideous Gold. Here it is. (Laying it on the table.) person, and I hate the sight of you! Your breast is Sil. And here is the will, which, that all may be flint. Flint! Unfeeling Gorgod, and I abominate Safe, we will immediately commit to the flames. you, [E.cit. (Is going to burn it at the candle; four successive loud Sophia. Nay, you are a kind, good cross old soul; knocks are heard, one from each of the doors. Sulky and I am sure you will forgive my poor ma'. We starts, drops og candle, and overturns the o: her.) Lord ought all to forget and forgive. Ought not we, Dir. have mercy uponi us! Dorton ? Gold. My hair stands on end L Harrg. With rapture, and looking to his father.) Widor. (Vidlene Anocking'at both ciosets, and as the Do you hear her, sir ? doors.) Save me, Mr. Goldfinchi Protect me! Ah! Dornton Harry has told me of your innocent, (Shrieks. Sulky and Milford burst open the closets, pure, and insuspecting Heart. I love you for and seize on the bond and promise, then open the having oalled me an ugly monster. chamber doors) Sophia. (70 Harry) La! Mr. Dornton, how could you Enter JENNY with lights, and SOPHIA, HARRY DORNTON, and MR. DORNTON. Sulky. Harry, give me your hand. You have a generous and a noble hature; but your generosity Sophia. Dbar, ma', what's the matter? would have proved more pernicious than even your Sulky. Where is the will? (silky recovers himself, dissipation. No misfortunes, no not the beggary and snatches it up.) Give it me sou old scoundrel and ruin of a father, could justify so unprincipled Give it me this instant, or I'll throttle you! ( Wrests a marriage. it from him.) Dornton And now (to Mr. Sulky.) my friend! Milford. So, gentlemen. You are a pretty pair of Milford. My father! Sulky. And you are a very worthy lady. [knaves. Harry. My Widow. Don't talk to me, man! Don't talk to Sulky. Who! if you wish to get another word me! I shall never recover my senses again. from me to-night, have done. (l'urning to Silky.) Harry. What has happened, gentlemen? How I hate fawning. came you thus all locked up together? Sil. Ah, Mr. Sulky! you will have your humour. Dornton. Are you here, Mr. Silky! Sulky. The undiscriminating generosity of this Sulky. Yes; there's the honest, grateful, friendly young man supported you in your day of distress; Mr. Silky! who would betray his friends, plunder for which, serpent-like, you turned to sting your the living, and defraud the dead, for the ease of his preserver. Curscience, and to provide for his family. Sil. Ah! you will have your humour. Gold. Old one! You're done up! Sulky. Yes; and it is my humour to see that Sulky. And here is the girlish old coquette, who your villany shall be exposed in its true colours. would rob her daughter, and leave her husband's Hypocrisy, falsehood, and fraud, are your famison to rot in a dungeon, that she might marry the liars. To screen your avarice, you made it believed first fool she could find. that this gentleman had been the cause of lodging Gold. Widow ! you are dished. (Sulky examines the the detainers, and had done the dirty work of last chance. which even you were ashained. But the creditors will.) Lost broken gamester, nurtured Dornton. A nurtured in idle-shall receive their full demand. ness, ignorance, and dissipation; whose ridings, Dornton. The proposal is just. Listen to that racings, and drivings are over, and whose whole worthy man; and if you can, be honest with a good train of horses, dogs, curricles, phaetons, and foole grace. Every thing will then be readily adjusted, ries must come to the hammer immediately, is no and I hope to the satisfaction of all parties. Sophia. Ob, la 1 [great loss, [Exeunt omnes. A COMEDY, IN FIVE ACTS.-BY GEORGE FARQUHAR 1. Mir. "No, MY FAIR ANGEL."Act iv, scene 2. Persons Represented. DUGARD. PETIT. wwww ORIANA. abroad, but he's too cunning for a domestic; I must dispose of him some way else. Who's here? Old Mirabel, and my sister!-my dearest sister! Enter OLD MIRABEL and ORIANA. Oriana. My brother! Welcome! Dug. Monsieur Mirabel, I'm heartily glad to see you. Old Mir. Honest Mr. Dugard, by the blood of the Mirabels! I'm your most humble servant. Dug. Why, sir, you've cast your skin, sure; you're brisk and gay; lusty health about you; no sign of age, but your silver hairs. Old Mir. Silver hairs! Then they are quicksilver hairs, sir. Whilst I have golden pockets, let my hairs be silver, an' they will. Adsbud! sir, I can dance, and sing, and drink, and-no, I can't wench. But Mr. Dugard, no news of my son Bob in all your travels? Dug. Your son's come home, sir. |
