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quors: Thus all Pretenders advance, as fast as they can, to a Feaver or a Diabetes. I must repeat to you,
that I do not look with an evil Eye upon the Profit of the ' Idols, or the Diverfions of the Lovers; what I hope • from this Remonstrance, is only that we plain People
may not be served as it we were Idolaters; but that ' from the time of publishing this in your Paper, the • Idols would mix Ratsbane only for their Admirers, and take more Care of us who don't love them. I am,
S I R, Tours, R
Monday, June 11.
Quid Domini facient, audent cum talia Fures? Virg.
May 30, 1711. Have no small Value for your Endeavours to lay before the World what may escape their Obser
Vation, and yet highly conduces to their Sere vice. You have, I think, succeeded very well on
many Subjects; and seem to have been conversant in very
different Scenes of Life. But in the Considerations & of Mankind, as a SPECTATOR, you should not romit Circumstances which relate to the inferior Part of
the World, any more than those which concern the
greater. There is one thing in particular which I won• der you have not touched upon, and that is the
ge• neral Corruption of Manners in the Servants of « Great Britain. I am a Man that have travelled and • seen many Nations, but have for seven Years last past • resided constantly in London, or within twenty Miles « of it: In this Time I have contracted a numerous • Acquaintance among the best Sort of People, and • have hardly found one of them happy in their Ser
vants. This is Matter of great Astonishment to Fo• reigners, and alt such as have visited Foreign Coun• tries; especially since we cannot but obserye, That
. there is no Part of the World where Servants have • those Privileges and Advantages as in England: They
have no where else such plentiful Diet, large Wages,
or indulgent Liberty : There is no Place wherein they ·labour less, and yet where they are so little respectful, more wasteful, more negligent, or where they so frequently change their Masters. To this I attribute, in a great measure, the frequent Robberies and Lofles which
we suffer on the high Road and in our own Houses. · That indeed which gives me the present Thought of • this kind, is, that a careless Groom of mine has spoiled
me the prettiest Pad in the World with only riding him ten Miles, and I assure you, if I were to make a Register of all the Horses I have known thus abused by
Negligence of Servants, the Number would mount a * Regiment. I wish you would give us your Observa
tions, that we may know how to treat these Rogues, ' or that we Masters may enter into Measures to reform
thein. Pray give us a Speculation in general about Servants, and you make me
"P.S. PRAY do not omit the Mention of Grooms in particular,
THIS honest Gentleman, who is so desirous that I : should write a Satyr upon Grooms, has a great deal of Reason for his Resentiment; and I know no Evil which touches all Mankind so much as this of the Misbehaviour of Servants.
THE Complaint of this Letter runs wholly upon Men-Servants; and I can attribute the Licenciousness which has at present prevailed among them, to nothing but what an hundred before me have ascribed it to, The Custom of giving Board-Wages : This one Instance of false Oeconomy is sufficient to debauch the whole Na. tion of Servants, and makes them as it were but for some Part of their Time in that Quality. They are either attending in Places where they meet and run into Clubs, or else, if they wait at Tayerns, they eat after their Masters,
and reserve their Wages for other Occasions. From hence it arises, That they are but in a lower Degree what their Masters themselves are; and usually affect an Imitation of their Manners: And you have in Liveries, Beaux, Fops, and Coxcombs, in as high Perfection as among People that keep Equipages. It is a common Humour among the Retinue of People of Quality, when in their Revels, that is when they are out of their Masters Sight, to assume in a humorous Way the Names and Titles of those whose Liveries they wear. By which means Characters and Distinctions become so fainiliar to them, that it is to this, among other Causes, one may impute a certain Infolence among our Servants, that they take no Notice of
Gentleman though they know him ever so well, except he is an Acquaintance of their Master's.
MY Obscurity and Taciturnity leave me at Liberty, without Scandal, to dine, if I think fit, at a common Ordinary, in the ineanest as well as the most sumptuous House of Entertainment. Falling in the other Day at a Viąualling-House near the House of Preers, I heard the. Maid come down and tell the Landlady at the Bar, That my Lord Bishop swore he would throw her out at Window if she did not bring up more Mild Beer, and that my Lord Duke would have a double Mug of Purle. My Surprize was encreased, in hearing loud and rustick Voices speak and answer to each other upon the publick Affairs,
by the Names of the most Illustrious of our Nobility; i till of a sudden one came running in, and cry'd the House
was rising. Down came all the Company together, and away! The Ale-House was immediately filled with Climour and scoring one Mug to the Marquiss of such a Place, Oyl and Vinegar to such an Earl, three Quarts to my new Lord for wetting his Title, and so forth. It is a Thing too notorious to mention the Crowds of Servanis, and their Insolence, near the Courts of Justice, and the Stairs towards the Supreine Assembly, where there is an universal Mockery of all Order, such riotous Clamour and licentious Confusion, that one would think the whole Nation lived in Jeft, and there were no such thing as Rule and Distinction among us.
*THE next Place of Resort, wherein the servile World are let loose, is at the Entrance of Hide-Park, while the Gentry are at the Ring. Hither People bring their Lacquies out of State, and here it is that all they say at their Tables, and act in their Houses, is communicated to the whole Town. There are Men of Wit in all Conditions of Life ; and mixing with these people at their Diverfions, I have heard Coquets and Prudes as well rallied, and Insolence and Pride exposed, (allowing for their want of Education) with as much Humour and good Sense, as in the politest Companies. It is a general Obfervation, That all Dependants run in fone measure into the Manners and Behaviour of those whom they serve: You shall frequently meet with Lovers and Men of Intrigue among the Lacquies, as well as at White's or in the Side-Boxes. I. remember some Years ago an Instance of this Kind. A Footman to a Captain of the Guard used frequently, when his Master was out of the Way, to carry on Amours and make Assignations in his Master's Cloaths. The Fellow had a very good Person, and there are very many Women that think no further ihan the Outside of a Gentleman belides which, he was almost as learned a Man as the Colonel himself: I say, thus qualified, the Fellow could scrawl Billets-doux lo well, and furnish a Conversaţion on the common Topicks, that he had, as they callit, a great deal of good Business on his Hands. It happened one Day, that coming down a Tavern Stairs in his Master's fine Guard Coat, with a well-dress’d Woman masked, be met. the Colonel coming up with other Company, but with a ready Assurance he quitted his Lady, came up to him, and faid, sir, I know you have too much Respect for your self to cane me in this honourable. Habit : But you see there is quis Lady in the Cafe, and I hope on that Score also you will put: off your Anger till I have told you all.another time. After 3 little Pause the Colonel cleared up his Countenance, and with an Air of Familiarity whispered his Man apart, Sirrah, bring the Lady with you to ask Pardon for you, then aloud, Look to it, Will, r'll never forgive you elfe. The Fellow went back to his Mistress, and telling her with a loud Voice and an Oath, That was the honestest Fellow in the World, conveyed her to an Hackney-Coach.
BUT the many Irregularities committed by Servants in the Places above-mentioned, as well as in the Theatres of which Masters are generally the Occasions, are too various not to need being resumed on another Occafion. R
Tuesday, June 12.
Petite hinc juvenesque fenesque Finem animo certum, miserisque viatica canis. Cras hoc fiet. Idem cras fiet. Quid? quasi magnum Nempe diem donas; sed cum lux altera venit, Jam cras hefternum confumpfimus; ecce aliud cras Egerit hos annos, et semper paulum erit ulira. Nam quamvis prope te, quamvis temone sub uno Vertentum fefe fruftra sečtabere canthum. Per. Smy: Correfpondents upon the Subject of Love are very numerous, it is my Design, it possible, to
range them under several Heads, and address my felf to them at different Times. The first Branch of them, to whofe Service I shall dedicate this Paper, are those that have to do with Women of dilatory Tempers, who are for spinning out the Time of Courtship to an immoderate. Length, without being able either to close with their Lovers, or to dismiss them. I have many Letters by me filled with Complains against this sort of Women.
In one of them no less a Man than a Brother of the Coif
, rell's me, that he began his Suit Vicessimo nono Caroli fecundi, before he had been a Twelve-month at the Temple; that he prosecuted it for many years after he was called to the Bar; that at present he is a Serjeant at Law; and notwithstanding he hoped that Matters would have been long since brought to an Issue, the Fair One ftill demurrs. I am so well pleased with this Gentleman's Phrase, that I shall diftinguish this Sect of WOmen by the Title of Demarrers. I find by another Letter from one that calls himself Thirsis, that his Mistress has been demurring above these feven Years.